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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 4:17:34 PM

bandit25

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I used to not be good at forgiveness until a very wise woman told me to look at kids. They forgive us parents so many things. Yes, we do the best we can, but how many times do we make mistakes? I know I sure have. Yet, my kids forgive me every time.

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 4:19:14 PM

ShiftedJewel

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quote:

I'm not very good at forgiveness, or forgetting, for that matter. Usually, if someone does me a great wrong, which for me usually involves a lie, my life goes on without that person. Bam, done, outta here. No forgiveness, no forgetting, just getting on with things. There are rare exceptions. My family, of course, is always an exception.

My sentiments exactly... my life goes on and I don't beat myself up because I never went to the person that wronged me and tell them I forgive them... That's just not me. The only difference between feastie and I, there are family members that I have not forgiven or forgotten what happened. And my life has been just fine for the last 23 years of not talking to that particular sister. Cold hearted? Yep. But when it comes to defending my nestlings, believe me, it's better that I walk out of your life then to stick around.

Jewel

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 4:38:00 PM

meatcleaver

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I've often thought of myself as easy going and can accept human frailty so I don't get hung up about minor wrongs done against me. Hell I could forgive big wrongs if I receive and apology. The only person I hold a grudge against is someone who did something big and called me crazy when I asked for apology. I never realised how mad and mean I can be when a big wrong has been done against me and has been compounded by the fact it was happily intentional and the person feels no regret at having done it. I'm getting on with my life but sooner or later I'll get even if no apology has been received and now I don't expect one. As for forgiveness being a gift, the only gift I would give this person is quick strangulation. The only reason I don't confront this person is because I probably would strangle her, I'm still so mad when I think about what she did.

It's pointless forgiving someone who doesn't want to be forgiven.

< Message edited by meatcleaver -- 7/14/2006 4:40:11 PM >

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 5:21:10 PM

IronBear

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From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Mind you, you could always kill em with kindness. It really pisses some people off when you tell them that you forgive them......

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 5:55:40 PM

meatcleaver

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Actually, that might be an idea Ironbear. Rot her insides with sugar.

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 5:58:42 PM

IronBear

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Hell yes and the best thing is that it stops you rotting with anger etc.

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Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/14/2006 6:23:28 PM

RosaB

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I find myself forgiving every damn day.

But first I count to ten. In all seriousness, grudges are a waste of healthy energy. Forgive, not saying, forget the eliments that caused the hurt, nor allow it to happen again if it can be avoided, but forgive and move on. Its the most freeing thing you can do for yourself aside for throwing darts at a picture of the wrong doer.

Rosa

< Message edited by RosaB -- 7/14/2006 6:26:44 PM >

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/15/2006 11:29:40 AM

Tikkiee

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Hmm, sorry, but I don't hold with the 'forgive others so you can begin the journey of healing'. No thank you. There are alot of things in my past that were done to me, and there is no way in hell that I will ever forgive the person's responsible for them. I have made peace with myself over what happened, and that's enough for me. The rest...they can rot in hell for all I care.

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RE: Forgiveness - 7/15/2006 11:56:39 AM

juliaoceania

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I understand this view, and as you can tell others share your views. I have not walked a mile in your shoes, I have no idea what happened to you, and your worldview is as valid to you as mine is to me. The important thing is peace of mind, and since you have found yours in your way that is ALL that matters. For others it is not that way, they must find closure in another way than you found yours... all paths leading to the same place are valid paths... in this case the destination is serenity and peace of mind... Im glad you have found your way back from the wrongs done to you.

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