Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: m f comparisions


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: m f comparisions Page: <<   < prev  5 6 [7] 8 9   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 3:39:11 PM   
dreamlady


Posts: 737
Joined: 9/13/2007
From: Western MD
Status: offline 		(I'm only using your quote as a reference point, and my post is not necessarily directed to you for a reply.)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

...what I am seeing here is the idea that male subs are weak and malleable. And that it pisses the fuck out of some self proclaimed female dominants that others are calling them out on it.
<snip>
Yup, my man didn't have to compete with "Pro Doms". . . . I'm just trying to understand, as much as I can from my POV, what the heck makes the "M/f" relationship something special.

I hope I don't regret this, because the last thing I want to see is this turning into a complaint thread or about finDoms and professional BDSM providers.

A poster named crumpets posted about maleness and femaleness having ascendency over submissiveness, and I'm inclined to agree. Then it was pointed out that financial domination is more the domain of Dommes, and that male Doms who practice this are still relying upon the participation of male subs. I cannot validate this, but I understand there are pro subs and pro switches whose client base is comprised of male Dominants, the common denominator being that of maleness in being willing to pay for sexual and/or BDSM services. That there may be exceptions to this does not negate commonality.

So, is it overly simplistic to chalk this up to gender differences? That the modus operandi of males differs from that of females, when seeking out a fetish delivery system, regardless of which side of the D/s kneel they're on.

Circling back to the most frequently heard/expressed complaints by Dominants, then. Now I will address you in terms of a couple remarks you made that struck me as "poor little rich girl" when it comes to Dommes complaining about subs. (I think you meant male subs in particular.) I'm wondering whether you feel any Dominant who "complains" about submissives is just sour grapes, or if there is a significant difference in substance between F/m and M/f, either as to a Dominant's expectations of submissive performance or any other characteristic. (This isn't to put you on the spot, and anybody can opine, but I am curious about this angle.)

To kick this off then, taking fetishists for example, do male Doms express a similar degree of frustration with all the female fetishists or female bottoms out there who aren't "truly" submissive?

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 121
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 3:41:18 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		It was directed to the OP Lucy, and littleladybug I think you need to calm down. You don't know me, that's my point. I just playfully suggested I have knowledge of quantum physics and for whatever reason you took that personally. Earlier I didn't even want to respond but you and quizzical were going at each other much to GotSteel's amusement. I was pointing out that a lot of people on this thread were doing naught more than playing into his hands. Men and women are different, always have been even at a mental level and if you don't believe me I do have a friend who is a psych professor who'll be happy to elaborate further or you can review studies about it yourself. When I tried to stop the women on here from fighting each other all of the sudden everyone (yet again) started personally attacking me for little to no reason. This has to stop at some point. It's fine to have debates, I like being playful on here, not where people are legitimately getting upset over...I'm not even sure. I never had a problem with you or Lucy but I dont' like people trying to bait me into some sort of weird "outing" tactic. It's underhanded, dirty, mean and uncalled for. Bottom line. Threads have started about me before and have lasted this long and this getting ridiculous. Who even does this? I have heard of high schoolers doing this sort of thing but not adults. It's so obvious what this man is doing especially when he insinuates I'm "name calling" and people actually believe that.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 122
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 3:48:05 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		Then i wont respond to it.....
but i sure as hell have no interest in anyones "outing".
the paranoia over being disagreed with, seems to be strong today, and making dumb assumptions to.
I dont get it.
happily

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 123
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 3:49:50 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

Then i wont respond to it.....
but i sure as hell have no interest in anyones "outing".
the paranoia over being disagreed with, seems to be strong today, and making dumb assumptions to.
I dont get it.
happily


*Rereads the OP* Paranoia, really?

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 124
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 3:57:01 PM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		im not talking about the op.......shrugs


_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 125
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:07:22 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		The op is the premise for this entire discussion that followed? But uhm...OK...
Good angle to approach the topic I have to add dreamlady.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 126
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:23:30 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

It was directed to the OP Lucy, and littleladybug I think you need to calm down. You don't know me, that's my point. I just playfully suggested I have knowledge of quantum physics and for whatever reason you took that personally.


What? You've suggested that you have knowledge in a lot of things...but I don't see quantum physics.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
Earlier I didn't even want to respond but you and quizzical were going at each other much to GotSteel's amusement. I was pointing out that a lot of people on this thread were doing naught more than playing into his hands.


That says a whole freaking lot right there.

What I saw him saying had little to nothing to do with all else that was going on. Or was it? Was it a "male thing" that I just didn't see? Did he and every other male out there get a "kick" out of this? Is that what males are wont to do?

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
Men and women are different, always have been even at a mental level and if you don't believe me I do have a friend who is a psych professor who'll be happy to elaborate further or you can review studies about it yourself.


I'm sure you have a "friend" in just about every profession. You are JUST that important. I get that.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
When I tried to stop the women on here from fighting each other all of the sudden everyone (yet again) started personally attacking me for little to no reason.


And, please let me know when you tried to "stop" anything here. And, who are YOU to try to stop anything anyway?

Honestly, I would like to know when and where you have EVER tried to stop any controversy, between anyone.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

This has to stop at some point. It's fine to have debates, I like being playful on here, not where people are legitimately getting upset over...I'm not even sure. I never had a problem with you or Lucy but I dont' like people trying to bait me into some sort of weird "outing" tactic. It's underhanded, dirty, mean and uncalled for. Bottom line. Threads have started about me before and have lasted this long and this getting ridiculous. Who even does this? I have heard of high schoolers doing this sort of thing but not adults. It's so obvious what this man is doing especially when he insinuates I'm "name calling" and people actually believe that.


"Outing"? What does this even mean in this context?

I'm taking you by what you have said here, and quite frankly, I'm confused. You have a sub in Canada and apparently you have worked your magic with the powers that be up there to get his "paperwork" straightened out, and at the same time you have someone in NY you are giving orders to, too boot you have said that there has been a marriage proposal. One might think that you are the "fem dom" to be looked up to. Why not tell us all about that here, rather than concentrating on the negative? Shit, who am I? A sub who has had more than her own trials. Never had anything handed to her, and is trying to make things work with a local Dom who may or may not be her "soulmate".

*shrug* I simply don't get it.



(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 127
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:26:03 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline 		LOL wut? Stop trying is my suggestion because that attempt was as laughable as my "first experience was a PTSD Dom".

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/13/2015 4:50:05 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 128
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:29:16 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

LOL wut?


Tee hee

You are just the most adorable dom ever.


(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 129
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:30:47 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

Stop trying is my suggestion because that attempt was as laughable as my "first experience was a PTSD Dom".


And, that means ANYTHING because?


(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 130
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:38:23 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

What? You've suggested that you have knowledge in a lot of things...but I don't see quantum physics.

Oh right, you didn't catch that. Earth's magnetic field? That's quantum field theory.
quote:


That says a whole freaking lot right there.

What I saw him saying had little to nothing to do with all else that was going on. Or was it? Was it a "male thing" that I just didn't see? Did he and every other male out there get a "kick" out of this? Is that what males are wont to do?

Alrighty then. *smiles*
quote:


I'm sure you have a "friend" in just about every profession. You are JUST that important. I get that.

I do miss the Dutch Namibian on Wall St I was quite taken with, we had lovely economic debates.

quote:

And, please let me know when you tried to "stop" anything here. And, who are YOU to try to stop anything anyway?

Honestly, I would like to know when and where you have EVER tried to stop any controversy, between anyone.

Uhm....OK?
quote:


"Outing"? What does this even mean in this context?

I'm taking you by what you have said here, and quite frankly, I'm confused. You have a sub in Canada and apparently you have worked your magic with the powers that be up there to get his "paperwork" straightened out, and at the same time you have someone in NY you are giving orders to, too boot you have said that there has been a marriage proposal. One might think that you are the "fem dom" to be looked up to. Why not tell us all about that here, rather than concentrating on the negative? Shit, who am I? A sub who has had more than her own trials. Never had anything handed to her, and is trying to make things work with a local Dom who may or may not be her "soulmate".

*shrug* I simply don't get it.

Honestly I have my trials too. I just won't speak of them on a public forum. Especially one where just saying "men and women are different" causes this much controversy. Nor have I ever put you down, I thought it was neat you painted your nails different colors to suit your mood and thought I need to get that girly about mine one day. I have never had anything handed to me either, it has been offered but I have this obsession with living life authentically. I apologize if I have done you wrong but I have nothing against you. Truly and I'm kind of mad now GotSteel even started this because I am not trying to upset anyone. Plus I have always thought you were kinda hot LOL.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/13/2015 4:39:50 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 131
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:45:10 PM   
NookieNotes


Posts: 1720
Joined: 11/10/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
where just saying "men and women are different"


Personally, I think "men and women are different" is a very different beast from "Also people need to stop comparing male subs to female subs, it is a totally, totally different ballgame here. I wouldn't know where to begin."

It's a matter of degree. I agree with the first statement, not the second, at least as far as I understand/read it.

Out of curiosity, it seems like we are also bringing male and female bottoms into the picture? And fetishists? Not just subs, right?


_____________________________

Nookie
--
https://datingkinky.com

I Write! A few of my books on Amazon: http://amazon.com/author/msnnotes

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 132
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:54:05 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NookieNotes


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
where just saying "men and women are different"


Personally, I think "men and women are different" is a very different beast from "Also people need to stop comparing male subs to female subs, it is a totally, totally different ballgame here. I wouldn't know where to begin."

It's a matter of degree. I agree with the first statement, not the second, at least as far as I understand/read it.

Out of curiosity, it seems like we are also bringing male and female bottoms into the picture? And fetishists? Not just subs, right?



Hmmm in my experience male subs and female subs are very different, both kink wise and service-submission wise as well as the way they see a Dominant female. I treat them differently as well and those reasons are applicable to my methods.

< Message edited by GoddessManko -- 3/13/2015 4:56:01 PM >

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to NookieNotes)
Profile   Post #: 133
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 4:56:20 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

I do miss the Dutch Namibian on Wall St I was quite taken with, we had lovely economic debates.


No doubt.

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko
Uhm....OK?
quote:



You mentioned that you tried to stop this "conflict" between quizzical kitten and myself. I would like to actually see where you tried to stop any conflict, at any point, on this forum. Should be simple, no?



(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 134
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:06:15 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug


You mentioned that you tried to stop this "conflict" between quizzical kitten and myself. I would like to actually see where you tried to stop any conflict, at any point, on this forum. Should be simple, no?



When she wanted to duct tape you I stepped in, maybe it was jealousy on my part.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 135
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:07:11 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko


quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug


You mentioned that you tried to stop this "conflict" between quizzical kitten and myself. I would like to actually see where you tried to stop any conflict, at any point, on this forum. Should be simple, no?



When she wanted to duct tape you I stepped in, maybe it was jealousy on my part.


Tee hee, probably so.

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 136
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:17:38 PM   
FelineRanger


Posts: 658
Joined: 9/4/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug


You mentioned that you tried to stop this "conflict" between quizzical kitten and myself. I would like to actually see where you tried to stop any conflict, at any point, on this forum. Should be simple, no?



Just one small clarification. I happen to know quizzicalkitten in the real world and know that nobody can stop her from doing anything unless she decides to stop. She's quite stubborn that way. And she eventually gets really pissed if you poke her in the ribs enough times.

_____________________________

Bill

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 137
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:18:27 PM   
GoddessManko


Posts: 2257
Joined: 3/6/2013
From: Dante's Inferno
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleladybug

Tee hee, probably so.


That made me grin. I knew I liked you.

_____________________________

Happy consent is the name of the game. You are my perfect Mistress. - my collared.

http://submissivemale.blogspot.com/

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame.

(in reply to littleladybug)
Profile   Post #: 138
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:29:57 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessManko

Hmmm in my experience male subs and female subs are very different, both kink wise and service-submission wise as well as the way they see a Dominant female. I treat them differently as well and those reasons are applicable to my methods.


What is your experience with female subs?

(in reply to GoddessManko)
Profile   Post #: 139
RE: m f comparisions - 3/13/2015 5:42:39 PM   
littleladybug


Posts: 1082
Joined: 5/30/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamlady
]

Circling back to the most frequently heard/expressed complaints by Dominants, then. Now I will address you in terms of a couple remarks you made that struck me as "poor little rich girl" when it comes to Dommes complaining about subs. (I think you meant male subs in particular.) I'm wondering whether you feel any Dominant who "complains" about submissives is just sour grapes, or if there is a significant difference in substance between F/m and M/f, either as to a Dominant's expectations of submissive performance or any other characteristic. (This isn't to put you on the spot, and anybody can opine, but I am curious about this angle.)



Ok, in terms of what I have seen as far as expectations from male dominants. It ranges from "let's meet and see" to "I will keep you in a cage, period". The majority I have seen trend toward the former.

I personally don't feel that all dominants that complain about not being able to find someone is suffering from "sour grapes". But, in my experience, there are a lot of them. There's a shitload, as I have seen, of "me Dom, you sub" going on, and I'm seeing that a lot from female dominants. And, when things go south, it's generally blamed on the sub-- because, you know, they haven't "done things right". Hence, my query-- what *is* the expectation? and, where does it come from?




(in reply to dreamlady)
Profile   Post #: 140
Page:   <<   < prev  5 6 [7] 8 9   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: m f comparisions Page: <<   < prev  5 6 [7] 8 9   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094