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dreamlady -> RE: Tactful response? (8/27/2015 6:50:03 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Michael34786aa
Well, you can post one of a kind pictures, just taken and keep them posted here, and no were else and not post them on your facebook account, so when you do a search they don't come up. Just a thought
As for your family and friends finding out, life is too short to worry what other people think about you. If my brother was to walk up to me and say, hey I saw your picture on collar space, my answer would be. AND. I don't let other people control my life or my search for happiness.
Also for the problem of Tommy surfing the kink site, well she does kind of look like me, by the way Tommy, why were you on the site for? Does your Mother know.
Sure, I can post all the one-of-a-kind pictures that I like, but I have very distinctive features and am easily recognizable. I live in a rather small town.
Many of you men have absolutely no clue what it's like for a woman to have to ward off unwanted attention. The fact that many of the clueless (aka horny net geeks) assume that every woman on any kind of a sex-related/kink site is fast, loose & easy. Instant sexual objectification.
Then there are always obsessive personalities who harbor delusions of being God's gift to women, who take every rejection personally and/or who can't take no for an answer.
Do we really want a man who chooses to contact women just based on their looks? Yes, I have minimum standards, but I don't interact on line with men based strictly on how physically attractive they might appear.
Charm, intelligence, kindness, courtesy, and a sense of humor are far more impressive. These qualities can override a few parameters that would ordinarily be beyond my ranges of consideration. It depends, of course.
I have seen pop-up messages that I'm being viewed by so-and-so and 15-30 seconds later there is a notification of a message. He could be the fastest speed reader around, but I highly doubt trolling dude bothered to read through my profile.
Why I'm taking the time to explain this to a man who's older than I am, who acts as if he's entitled to have any given woman's photos splashed all over the place, is rather bizarre. I mention age because I feel as though you might be in your retirement phase, have few to little family ties or obligations anymore that you care to be bothered with, and essentially no longer have anything to lose. This puts you out on the fringe of society to one extent or another.
Besides, how do you even know the pics you're viewing are for real? How does anyone know you have posted a current picture of yourself? Nobody knows whether they are who they say they are until one starts interacting on a more meaningful level than the personae we project to others. This takes a certain amount of investment in time and effort.
That's why exchanging messages are important, the info gathering process, noting discrepancies and taking note of potential red flags, as well as utilizing other screening devices, are of tantamount importance.
People stumble onto sites inadvertently, click onto links unintentionally. There's a big difference between wandering onto a site, surfing sites, and maintaining a profile as a registered user on a particular site.
You may not be as private a person, but I am. I guard my privacy. Need to Know Basis.
That doesn't mean I'm not an open person. . . just not an open gate bereft of a vigilent gatekeeper. [:)]
DreamLady
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