Greta75
Posts: 9968
Joined: 2/6/2011
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ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul
No way you can spin this. This is judgmental. This is implying that someone is abnormal and doesn't belong here.
Unlike red, I have apologised and in the future, I will word it differently with the same question. Because my intent was not to hurt people, I have no problem learning from it and changing the way I phrase things in the future. So man who I said it to admitted he was hurt from this. And I apologised. I don't know what else do you expect me to do about this other than what I have already done?
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The implication being that he is ashamed of it?
Actually that was my response to his implication that people should be ashamed for loving sex for sex.
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And this is another example of the error that you make in so many of your observations. You cannot tell context.
You can't hear tone in writings, so anything anybody writes me, whether it's sarcasm or joke, I will take it seriously that the person means exactly what that person says. There is no way for me to tell if the person is joking or being sarcastic. You may be able to see it and get it, because you came from the same culture, but I won't get it because we don't talk like that. I would really need the *sarcasm* symbol to be out there for me to get it as sarcasm.
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Yes, we know that you 'hear' all sorts of things. Time and time again you say 'a friend of mine from America told me...', and then you treat whatever your 'heard' as the gospel truth and make ignorant, blanket generalizations about the country. Or generalizations about some other country based on what you 'heard' about it.
But it is what I learn from people from those countries tell me about their own country. And many men are based in those countries, just travelling here for work, so of course I will believe they are not lying to me. Why would anybody want to lie to me about their own country and how it is like over there?
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You do know that there is a lot to bdsm that isn't about sex?
Of course there is many kinks without sex, that's why I asked him that question, so maybe he'll explain what his into that he hangs around here.
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Apparently, its everyone's interpretation. Still don't see it?
It's not everyone's interpretation. It's a few people's interpretation. You cannot lecture me that I cannot form my conclusions on a few people's opinion by now insisting that I form my conclusions on a few people opinions. Do make up your mind when you are dishing advice to me.
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Now you are accusing him of lying in the first place. Nice.
Actually any man who tells me his a virgin, it's my first instinct to not believe him, especially in a kink site. Yes I do find it hard to believe that a kink site would be filled with virgin men. And that is just my impression that usually men into kink are liberal about sex. So I was surprise he exists. Being surprise that someone of a particular made up exist isn't derogatory in any way. Just like most men are surprise that I hate to french kiss. Because that's not common.
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ORIGINAL: Greta75
So if you get paid for it, you are a whore. But if you don't charge for it, you are a genuine woman? Or normal? Interesting.
I use the word whore, like I use prostitute, and like I use sex worker. It's not derogatory but merely a description of their career. If there is a political correct word to use for sex worker that is the least insulting to people working in that industry, do enlighten me and I will always use that word in reference to them. As I said, I am not a political correct person but I have no problem to stop using words that hurt people who are actually in those careers, as I really respect them as human beings.
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You don't want to admit it, but yeah you did.
I didn't insult him. That's the truth. If he felt the way I worded things felt like an insult to him, that's how he feels about it, but does mean it is true that I intentionally insulted him and was trying to insult him. Two different things.
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All you have done is try to explain how everyone is misunderstanding you.
Because it's true.
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Your language is telling, even if you don't want to admit it.
I call the man I love the most, words like asshole and dickhead. It's just how I talk. My brothers call me bitch and whore lovingly. I know this is difficult for you, but I hang around people where such words can be used as words of love instead of hate. Because I've always felt, the best way to combat nasty words is to change their meanings and what they mean to you. It's exactly like in a D/S relationship sometimes when verbal humiliation play is going on, your dom may call you whore or slut but it's all words of love.
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Nothing against Ishtar, but this is a good example of your how treat things you 'heard' as the gospel, and base entire opinions and posts on that. Before Ishtar said this, you were basing your beliefs on what 'all the guys' told you. And going on quite a bit about it. Now, 1 person that you don't even know has told you something different, and you are ready to invalidate 'everything' you 'heard' from 'all they guys' before.
I have alot of respect for Ishtar even though I also had alot of clashes with her in the past especially over Gorean things. But one thing for sure, she is a role model to me in a way where she is what she is into and she's comfortable with her own sexuality and everything that she is. So anything she says, I do take as the gospel truth. And if it's the wrong interpretation, she will clarify to make sure people get accurate information. That's Ishtar.
< Message edited by Greta75 -- 10/3/2015 1:18:03 AM >
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RE: Men, Describe how it feels like to - 
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