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RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 8:16:25 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		Yes, sorry pandoral, I forgot. How dare a man have any consideration for his own gender. To be PC these days with gender politics, you have to be a gynocentric dirtbag.

< Message edited by respectmen -- 12/19/2015 8:17:49 PM >

(in reply to PandoraFoxxx)
Profile   Post #: 101
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 8:41:48 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

It's hard to see how men can be sexually liberated when women are always trying to make the rules on how we should run our sexuality.
If your sexuality is nonconsentually sending a complete stranger a picture of your genitals as a way of saying hello - then you need to be told there are rules. And that applies to whether you're male or female.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 102
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 9:01:53 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline
quote:

If your sexuality is nonconsentually sending a complete stranger a picture of your genitals as a way of saying hello - then you need to be told there are rules. And that applies to whether you're male or female.


As been explained in this thread, that's basically the nature of such websites. You would have a point if you were talking about vanilla dating sites. You do get men who do it on them sites and in that case I think they are wrong for it. On the other hand, on a sexual personals site like this, it's a whole different ball game.

I don't understand why women act like a flying cockroach landed on them whenever they see a cock pic on a website through a computer screen. It's so simple to just move on. Click to the next web page and its all history. There is nothing wrong of not liking it but to whine about it to the point of demanding men to not do it is going beyond too far. Men shouldn't get their sexual freedom taken away on a sexual website. I thought BDSM websites are supposed to be the most liberated websites when it comes to sexuality. The women seem to tell a different story though lol.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 103
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 9:14:34 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen


As been explained in this thread, that's basically the nature of such websites. You would have a point if you were talking about vanilla dating sites. You do get men who do it on them sites and in that case I think they are wrong for it. On the other hand, on a sexual personals site like this, it's a whole different ball game.


Your argument is that we should accept bad behavior because this is a BDSM site.

So, even though my profile clearly states that I'm just here for the forums - I should be tolerant of the socially stunted people who send me pictures of their genitals anyway.

I disagree - Just because this is BDSM doesn't mean that morals, manners and common courtesy get thrown away.



_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 104
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 10:29:15 PM   
PandoraFoxxx


Posts: 182
Joined: 1/3/2011
From: San Mateo, CA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen


As been explained in this thread, that's basically the nature of such websites. You would have a point if you were talking about vanilla dating sites. You do get men who do it on them sites and in that case I think they are wrong for it. On the other hand, on a sexual personals site like this, it's a whole different ball game.


Your argument is that we should accept bad behavior because this is a BDSM site.

So, even though my profile clearly states that I'm just here for the forums - I should be tolerant of the socially stunted people who send me pictures of their genitals anyway.

I disagree - Just because this is BDSM doesn't mean that morals, manners and common courtesy get thrown away.




Common courtesy doesn't apply to him. Don't you realize that? He's being OPPRESSED by females!

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 105
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 10:50:30 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		These poor women wouldn't be getting their titties in a tangle if they simply didn't expect men all around the world to change for them instead of going to a website like POF. That way, you can get a man taken off the site if he sends any sexual pictures or says anything sexual in their emails or profiles.

But no, the women here just can't seem to accept that the world wont change for them instead of finding a solution. In POF, you can mention that you're looking for a BDSM relationship, you just can't go on with details.

If you don't like the nature of sexual personal sites, leave. Simple as that. I don't like how this site makes women generally act. Instead of me demanding women to change, I simply don't seek women on these sites anymore. Problem solved.

(in reply to PandoraFoxxx)
Profile   Post #: 106
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/19/2015 11:03:11 PM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline
quote:

Your argument is that we should accept bad behavior because this is a BDSM site


Speaking of behaviour and what is good or bad. Last time I checked, BDSM is socially taboo with most people in the vanilla world. We are all in this place for this same reason, to find someone who will accept what you seek which most people anywhere else would not accept. I thought the idea of such a website is to be more open minded compared to what's normal in the vanilla world, even something sexual that is totally looked down upon in the vanilla world. I thought the idea of a kink community is that we should be accepting to others even if you are not into what they are and if they like to run their sexuality different to you.

Not being accepting to see a cock on a computer screen on a sexual website is just as silly to not expect any sexual pics at all on a sexual personals website. Women even want to take it further than that and not allow men to talk about anything sexual at all on a personals sexual site or else they are "do me" lol.

So if you don't want to talk about anything sexual or see sexual pics, POF is the place for you. This site wont be.

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 107
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/20/2015 1:15:35 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		apart from the fact that genitalia as a primary picture is against TOS< which you actually agree to before being allowed in.


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(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 108
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/20/2015 3:19:57 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

quote:

Your argument is that we should accept bad behavior because this is a BDSM site


Speaking of behaviour and what is good or bad. Last time I checked, BDSM is socially taboo with most people in the vanilla world.

It's actually not as taboo as you might think except for the more extreme stuff.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
We are all in this place for this same reason,

Agreed.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
to find someone who will accept what you seek which most people anywhere else would not accept.

That's debatable.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
I thought the idea of such a website is to be more open minded compared to what's normal in the vanilla world, even something sexual that is totally looked down upon in the vanilla world.

Most of us are more open-minded.
That's why we are here and not on PoF.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
I thought the idea of a kink community is that we should be accepting to others even if you are not into what they are and if they like to run their sexuality different to you.

See above.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
Not being accepting to see a cock on a computer screen on a sexual website is just as silly to not expect any sexual pics at all on a sexual personals website.

This is NOT what we are saying.
Are you soo dense that you cannot see the difference between something IN-YOUR-FACE that you haven't asked for and something that you can provide if and when asked??
As Lucy said - it's against the ToS to have your main pic containing genitalia.
Simple rules that you want to break just because it's a kink site.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
Women even want to take it further than that and not allow men to talk about anything sexual at all on a personals sexual site or else they are "do me" lol.

Again... we say that you don't start the conversation/mail with kink.
Not that we don't want to talk about it - just don't LEAD with it!
That's because those that do are generally "do me" types and come across as desperate.
Nobody wants someone who is desperate.

If you can't see the difference, you are doomed to be single and left to play with Lady Palmer.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
So if you don't want to talk about anything sexual or see sexual pics, POF is the place for you. This site wont be.

And this is where you show your total ineptitude.

Most sensible people try to lead with their best bit; to put their best foot forward in an effort to attract our target.
If you cannot grasp the simple fact that if you put your dick in the spotlight as your opening gambit, people will see you as shallow with nothing better to offer.
As several have said, it's not the dick that's important, it's the person hanging off the other end of it.


_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
George Orwell, 1903-1950


(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 109
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/20/2015 3:47:14 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
Speaking of behaviour and what is good or bad. Last time I checked, BDSM is socially taboo with most people in the vanilla world.

Oh, Gawd. Here we go with this clap trap again. "The vanillas are all against us, so everything a kinky person wants to do should be great as long as we label it kinky." If you want to sing that song, you might want to keep in mind that BDSM is supposed to have something to do with consent. It doesn't mean if you're an exhibitionist, that I don't have the right not to observe.

quote:

We are all in this place for this same reason, to find someone who will accept what you seek which most people anywhere else would not accept.

That's not correct, either. Not everybody is here to date and you are perfectly aware of that. It's no different than people who go to the munch or the play party for the social aspect, rather than cruising for play.

quote:

I thought the idea of such a website is to be more open minded compared to what's normal in the vanilla world, even something sexual that is totally looked down upon in the vanilla world.

Ah, so if people *don't* want to be involved in your particular version of WIITWD, it's not "open-minded". That must mean that you consider yourself closed minded when you have your limits and boundaries, right? I mean, we want to make sure everybody is being treated equally.

quote:

I thought the idea of a kink community is that we should be accepting to others even if you are not into what they are and if they like to run their sexuality different to you.

There's a difference between accepting that your sexuality is different than mine and you being allowed to impose your sexuality on other people. If you find the person or people who enjoy your exhibitionism with cock shots and you want to swap photos to the point that even Viagra can't give you an erection anymore, fantastic! Go for it! Have a blast!

What you don't get to do is skip that neat concept of consent that says the other person has the right to choose whether they want to be involved with your kink or not.

quote:

Not being accepting to see a cock on a computer screen on a sexual website is just as silly to not expect any sexual pics at all on a sexual personals website.

Wait. A second ago, it was all about how it was a KINK site. Now, it's a sexual site because you say so? What about the people who separate the two?

Actually, nobody said you can't have sexual pics on the site. You can have all of the dick pics that you want in photos #2-14. That's exactly how they found a middle ground between you having the freedom to post pics of your junk and me not having to see it if I don't consent to viewing. I also get to delete emails that include pics that I don't want to see or remove them from my viewing page.

quote:

Women even want to take it further than that and not allow men to talk about anything sexual at all on a personals sexual site or else they are "do me" lol.

Talk about it all you want. In return, if it's on the forums, other people are just as permitted to say they have no interest in engaging with you. That even includes stuff like they aren't willing to talk with you personally about said kink, but they are more than happy to talk about it with sub X for whatever reason.

quote:

So if you don't want to talk about anything sexual or see sexual pics, POF is the place for you. This site wont be.

Considering the fact that this is a BDSM site, even though you want to keep labeling it as something else, I'm pretty sure that all of us engaging in BDSM (or those wanting to) can share the joint.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 110
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/20/2015 2:15:46 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

Are you soo dense that you cannot see the difference between something IN-YOUR-FACE that you haven't asked for and something that you can provide if and when asked??


Exactly. For a community that bases every thing on CONSENT - sending a picture of genitals without my consent goes against what we're supposed to be about.


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 111
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 4:35:13 AM   
respectmen


Posts: 2042
Joined: 8/28/2015
Status: offline 		A quicky for now. I am too tired to go in-depth with replies but I am interested in replying to LPs fallacies in the next couple of days.

It's really this simple, when you consent to joining a site like this, you are consenting to being exposed to sexual content that is not socially acceptable in the everyday world. You are consenting to be exposed to anti social behaviour which is simply BDSM. It's heavily anti social because people get sacked from their jobs for this.

It's a hypocritical standpoint to not like certain anti social behaviours from a website and make that the reason to not accept it and ridicule others for it because it's anti social and because it doesn't suit you while accepting other anti social types of behaviours when it suits you, your sexual turn ons.

When I mean accept it, I don't mean take the offer. In a kink community, I thought we should all be openly accepting towards others even if they are not your cup of tea.

If a pro domme or fin domme is entitled to only want a man's money on this site, why isn't a man entitled to only want his kinks fulfilled without any real relationship or friendship? I am not saying that I only want women for my sexual needs, but if a woman isn't judged for only wanting to exploit a man for his money through kinks, how is that any better than a man only wanting a woman for kinks and nothing more?

I am not saying pro dommes aren't entitled here. They are, even that many men feel annoyed by them.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 112
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 4:39:14 AM   
longwayhome


Posts: 1035
Joined: 1/9/2008
Status: offline 		Wow.

Having read this thread, the standard of women-hating discourse has certainly plummeted recently. Time was you could have a really good tussle with a post-modern anti-feminist who you disagreed with but actually had a go at a decent intellectual justification.

FFS (I hate text speak but I'm trying to swear less) - just stop whining!

If women generally don't like dick shots (especially out of context) just suck it up (so to speak). It's not anti-male and it's not an erosion of your civil liberties.

I'm a man and I like fair warning (or a bit of a warm up) before I get full-on genital shots, male or female, so I'm not keen on a muff or a night-stick as a primary profile pic.

Someone who likes you very much may gasp when they see your dick, but that's you, the candlelight and perhaps the prospect of whipping your ass. If that's never happened to you, find someone who is really important to you (and vice versa) - something less likely to happen if you use your dick as an ad. If you truely have a whopper, a small and specialist band of men and women are genuine size queens - good luck in finding them.


In the meantime don't lead with your dick (or think or vote or spend or stir tea with it). It's not one of your constitutional rights.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 113
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 5:13:24 AM   
freedomdwarf1


Posts: 6845
Joined: 10/23/2012
Status: offline 		@respectmen and @longwayhome
...and anyone else with the same PoV.

Although the site gives you fair warning of explicit imagery, it also states that you should NOT have explicit shots as your primary photo.
This forms part of the Terms of Service that you agreed to when you joined up.

If you can't stick to the rules, you should leave the site instead of arguing the point.
It really is as simple as that.


_____________________________

“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they do not want to hear.”
George Orwell, 1903-1950


(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 114
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 5:37:03 AM   
longwayhome


Posts: 1035
Joined: 1/9/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: freedomdwarf1

@respectmen and @longwayhome
...and anyone else with the same PoV.

Although the site gives you fair warning of explicit imagery, it also states that you should NOT have explicit shots as your primary photo.
This forms part of the Terms of Service that you agreed to when you joined up.

If you can't stick to the rules, you should leave the site instead of arguing the point.
It really is as simple as that.


Many apologies for taking exception with you but I share none of the views of @respectmen.

I am sorry that subtlety, sarcasm or parody doesn't always come across online, but careful reading would clarify the point that I disagree with anti-feminists and am tired of all their whining about the effect on their civil liberties. I am also quite explicit about thinking that gratuitous knob shots are not a good idea.

So thank you for inviting me to leave the site, despite the fact that I don't advocate cock shots in primary photos (or any photos for that matter) and am fed up with people who think it is their right to display their cocks at every occasion.

I don't always pick up on every mistaken impression as a result of one of my posts. However when it involves someone thinking I am advocating breaking the ToS, supporting a bunch of misogynistic old socks and promoting dick pics, I've got to make some sort of clarification.

I'm sure including me in your post was just an innocent misreading (as opposed to being malicious), but implying that I was advocating breaking the rules and, if I did, I should leave the site, was quite a big message to hang on such an error.

(in reply to freedomdwarf1)
Profile   Post #: 115
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 5:50:53 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
A quicky for now. I am too tired to go in-depth with replies but I am interested in replying to LPs fallacies in the next couple of days.

It's really this simple, when you consent to joining a site like this, you are consenting to being exposed to sexual content that is not socially acceptable in the everyday world. You are consenting to be exposed to anti social behaviour which is simply BDSM. It's heavily anti social because people get sacked from their jobs for this.

A quick word on this. As you know, I've worked HR before, and here in the States, you can *find* a reason to fire almost anyone. Somebody had better be the best dang employee on the planet to be able to prove that the underlying reason was their sexuality. This is an entirely separate thread, of course, but I think you might have seen my comments on this before.

quote:

It's a hypocritical standpoint to not like certain anti social behaviours from a website and make that the reason to not accept it and ridicule others for it because it's anti social and because it doesn't suit you while accepting other anti social types of behaviours when it suits you, your sexual turn ons.

Sorry. It's crap. Every kinky person is going to like the kinks they like and dislike the ones they don't. The ones they don't, they don't have to view, participate in, and even choose to enjoy with some people while not with others.

quote:

When I mean accept it, I don't mean take the offer. In a kink community, I thought we should all be openly accepting towards others even if they are not your cup of tea.

I don't know why people promote this fairy tale. I don't see you saying anything about, oh, how female supremacy is terribly acceptable for you. Do you hang around (sorry, bad pun) when folks are doing anal hook suspensions or are engaged in creating crown of thorn pics? How do you feel about the pro ana/mia folks or the feeders? Might want to be careful about throwing that word "hypocrite" around.

quote:

If a pro domme or fin domme is entitled to only want a man's money on this site, why isn't a man entitled to only want his kinks fulfilled without any real relationship or friendship? I am not saying that I only want women for my sexual needs, but if a woman isn't judged for only wanting to exploit a man for his money through kinks, how is that any better than a man only wanting a woman for kinks and nothing more?

Did you miss the part where I said that if you found that situation, that would be great? Have at it. Just realize that most women don't find males who only want their kinks satisfied to be what they are looking for. It's just not a high demand area. If you want to compare the two, you have to look at the factor that there is a demand for one and not the other.

Nobody said you can't want what you want. At the same time, nobody has to give it to you, either. Just like I can't make you give me anything you don't want to give.

quote:

I am not saying pro dommes aren't entitled here. They are, even that many men feel annoyed by them.

Wonderful! I look forward to seeing your support on the matter in the various prodomme and fin kink threads in the future.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to respectmen)
Profile   Post #: 116
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 6:05:57 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		The temptation to post pictures Ive seen on profiles is getting stronger, like the guy laying on his back having a shit, or the guy with one leg up and a pic of his current poop making its way out of his arse, or the 350 lb guy bending over fully dressed but his arse and balls danglin like a rhino, or the girls playing with puke, or the diseased phimosis cock shot of a really sick looking penis, Menstral blood lovers covered in clots and tampons.
I wont, but yeah, Nick still hasnt explained that genitalia is not sposed to be a primary picture
Hey NICK????
why arent you challenging that?


_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 117
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 6:06:50 AM   
LadyConstanze


Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		I seriously don't have an issue with a kink that isn't mine, my kinks aren't everybody's cup of tea, fair dues, but I don't force my kinks on others, it's a matter of consent and respect, I view it the same way as BDSM in a vanilla environment, the people haven't consented to be part of a scene, so it's a violation of consent.

In case I go to a party, I don't go around and hit everybody with a whip who wears a slave collar, they haven't consented and they might actually have a dominant as well, so I would be disrespectful to their dominant AND I would be playing without consent.

Why is forcing a picture of genitalia on somebody acceptable?

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

http://exdomme.blogspot.com/2012/07/public-service-announcement.html

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 118
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 6:14:31 AM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic
The temptation to post pictures Ive seen on profiles is getting stronger, like the guy laying on his back having a shit, or the guy with one leg up and a pic of his current poop making its way out of his arse, or the 350 lb guy bending over fully dressed but his arse and balls danglin like a rhino, or the girls playing with puke, or the diseased phimosis cock shot of a really sick looking penis, Menstral blood lovers covered in clots and tampons.
I wont, but yeah, Nick still hasnt explained that genitalia is not sposed to be a primary picture
Hey NICK????
why arent you challenging that?

I was thinking something similar, though none of the pics in my stash have anything on some of those.



_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Lucylastic)
Profile   Post #: 119
RE: Can someone please tell the male subs - 12/21/2015 6:18:28 AM   
Lucylastic


Posts: 40310
Status: offline 		I have lots. sadly, I do consider it a personal flaw I cant quit.

_____________________________

(•_•)
<) )╯SUCH
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> A NASTY
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> WOMAN
/ \

Duchess Of Dissent
Dont Hate Love

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 120
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