RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious

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Caretakr -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:18:05 PM)
That's fine Bearlee. I have mild ADD. Crowds and gawkers ruin my focus, and that ruins my enjoyment. It's why I don't attend public events.

peta -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:20:28 PM)
i have found that the touch of a Sadist is something not only wanted but craved for. There is something so intensely hot about His mannerisms, His approach, His 'bite'. i do agree that a Dom should know the submissive well before anything too extreme, but i am not one to act shyly when i am around the right type of man. Oh and hello everyone, i am peta. peta

Caretakr -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:22:05 PM)
Hello peta. Welcome.

peta -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:40:03 PM)
Hi right back at you and thank you. peta

popeye1250 -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:41:03 PM)
Welcome aboard, Peta!

peta -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 2:44:40 PM)
Thank you Popeye!! Love the name peta

CreativeDominant -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 3:28:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SusanofO quote: ORIGINAL: CreativeDominant "and the use of my own brake for not wanting or being willing to damage someone physically/emotionally/mentally all comes into play". Creative: How do you determine, personally, when to "put on the brake"? Is it different for each scene (yes, I suppose it is). I am not meaning to get too personal here. I just want to know if determining that is different than when you are doing a non-Sadistic scene. Thanks. Well, now he's gone, too. If anyone else can answer that question, feel free. **And thank you to everyone, for the replies, so far. I appreciate them - a lot. - Susan I'm back again. [;)] I'm really enjoying the thread so far...so many responses that give a person something to think about. As I noted in my second post to you, yes the brake is different with each scene and with various partners. My first submissive was a person that always perspired during a scene...didn't matter whether it was cool or hot in the room but she perspired. It was always in an even manner though. One time I had moved to using my Serpent's Bite toy on her and she began to sweat profusely after only 3 or 4 strikes. She had never responded in this fashion before so I stopped and asked her if she was alright. She did not/could not answer. I tried the squeeze method...nothing for almost 2 minutes. I tipped her chin up and looked in her face and saw tears streaming down her face and the most godawful/godwonderful look in her eyes. I stopped the scene, untied her and just gathered her up into my arms. She soon started crying and after she stopped, she thanked me for stopping because if I had hit her 1 or 2 more times, she'd have gone out. So, in this case, it was a matter of doing several things discussed on here recently...reading the person I was with, being aware of things I had learned in previous scenes with others and with her, knowing beforehand what I intended to do and using a variation on the 'mindfuck' (as discussed on another thread) to help get her into a masochistic frame of mind before play ever started and seeing how much into that state she got, and not relying simply on a safeword to stop my play. I think most play in the BDSM realm is sadistic/masochistic at its heart. There is an energy level that happens between two people engaging in the 'game' and when it's right, it helps to feed the situation...when it's wrong, if you're paying real damn close attention (and, in MOO, you should be), you can pick up on that too. Not that I think that you should wait until the energy goes wrong to stop a scene. Part of the fun in sadism sometimes is stopping just when you know your partner could/wants/craves to do more.

kyraofMists -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 7:08:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KnightofMists I have done many heavy Kicking scenes. Back, Buttocks, Chest, Upper Arms, Thighs have all be places that my foot has landed. Heavying kicking can be an incredible play. A couple weeks ago when I went to Ft.Lauderdale to visit kyra, we went go the hotel overlooking the beach. Her first thought of the room was standing against the window getting the hell kicked out of her. She asked for it.... and being the sadist I am... I told her maybe... she's still waiting for it .... that mental/emotional twist is fun sometimes. Now as she reads this she is going to wonder if she should of asked or shouldn't of asked... mmmm more twist! But, as last thought... Yeah I will be kicking the hell out of her again... she can count on it... but she will not know when. To ask or not to ask.... to kick or not to kick..... which will get me a kicking play quicker, asking for one, or kicking you the next time we are in play? w The first time I did that started an wonderful kicking scene... kyra

SusanofO -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/20/2006 11:58:23 PM)
Somone just mentioned biting. I don't think I'd like that and it really would scare me (except for those litle nibbles on our necks we've all had beofre, of course). I mena nasty, hard chomping. Ouch!!! Gonna have to think that over. - Susan

TheShadows -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 2:51:26 AM)
I know it's a little late into the discussion, but as a Sadist, I feel obligated to add my two cents...lol. As everyone else has already stated, a lot of knowing when to put the brakes on depends on the person, the flow of the scene itself, the place, etc. All those things hold true for me as well. As a Sadist, it's ultimately my goal to hurt, not harm. And yes, there's a BIG different, IMO. I want screams, tears, and blood. Not broken bones and late night trips to the ER. In a purely S&M scene, the masochist reaching subspace is secondary to me, which may sound crude but... <OFFSHOOT>Which brings me to another subject...I'd rather hurt someone that doesn't really want to be hurt than someone who wants it. For me, it adds that little extra touch of control, that little extra feeling of power, and sparks that little voice in my head that says..."You shouldn't be doing this, you should feel a little bit bad cuz this person really doesn't like it...BUT YOU KNOW YOU DON'T, SO KEEP GOING! MWAHAHAH!" LOL. I want the person to NOT like it.</OFFSHOOT> I think the ultimate scene for me would be the one where I wouldn't have to put on the brakes, and could do everything and anything I wanted to do, within safety and legal boundaries, of course. Don't get me wrong. The Brakes are important. But just once, I'd like to see what I'm capable of, what my husband is capable of Sadistically, and what we'd be capable of doing together, to one serious masochist who wants to find out exactly how far they can go, too. To pose an actual question: Sadists...Would rather hurt someone that wants to be hurt, or someone that doesn't want to be hurt? As always, YMMV... TheShadows

CreativeDominant -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 6:44:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TheShadows I know it's a little late into the discussion, but as a Sadist, I feel obligated to add my two cents...lol. As everyone else has already stated, a lot of knowing when to put the brakes on depends on the person, the flow of the scene itself, the place, etc. All those things hold true for me as well. As a Sadist, it's ultimately my goal to hurt, not harm. And yes, there's a BIG different, IMO. I want screams, tears, and blood. Not broken bones and late night trips to the ER. In a purely S&M scene, the masochist reaching subspace is secondary to me, which may sound crude but... <OFFSHOOT>Which brings me to another subject...I'd rather hurt someone that doesn't really want to be hurt than someone who wants it. For me, it adds that little extra touch of control, that little extra feeling of power, and sparks that little voice in my head that says..."You shouldn't be doing this, you should feel a little bit bad cuz this person really doesn't like it...BUT YOU KNOW YOU DON'T, SO KEEP GOING! MWAHAHAH!" LOL. I want the person to NOT like it.</OFFSHOOT> I think the ultimate scene for me would be the one where I wouldn't have to put on the brakes, and could do everything and anything I wanted to do, within safety and legal boundaries, of course. Don't get me wrong. The Brakes are important. But just once, I'd like to see what I'm capable of, what my husband is capable of Sadistically, and what we'd be capable of doing together, to one serious masochist who wants to find out exactly how far they can go, too. To pose an actual question: Sadists...Would rather hurt someone that wants to be hurt, or someone that doesn't want to be hurt? As always, YMMV... TheShadows I would state that I would qualify my answer by saying this: I want to play with someone that wants to play with me. In real terms, that usually involves someone who wants to be hurt. Now is where the 'but' comes in...[&:] Yes, I play with those who want to be hurt but I make sure they are people who also want those hurt limits 'pushed' a bit. It IS much more fun to take someone who says "I like a few marks but I'm not sure if I could handle them all over my ass" and then, doing just a couple more than a few but not completely covering their ass. When they say "Oh God, that's tight enough, please Sir" when you're putting clamps on their nipples, I love to tighten them up one more turn of the screw. Of course, as I've noted before...there's a lot to be said for the sadism of leaving them not only wanting but craving just a bit more ... and not doing it that session.

Caretakr -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 6:52:41 AM)
I prefer those who can suffer a bit to the happy masos. So it's a bit of both.

SusanofO -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 8:10:50 AM)
Thanks for the reply Shadows (even if you did scare me a little, he). - Susan

Sensualips -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 11:47:02 AM)
quote: I am enjoying the heck out of this discussion. Me too. quote: Crowds and gawkers ruin my focus, and that ruins my enjoyment. It's why I don't attend public events. And yet for others, the exact opposite is true. I love the feeling of being completely focused despite an audience or other scening going on nearbye. For me, it can be an enhancement.

SusanofO -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 12:03:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Sensualips quote: I am enjoying the heck out of this discussion. Me too. quote: Crowds and gawkers ruin my focus, and that ruins my enjoyment. It's why I don't attend public events. And yet for others, the exact opposite is true. I love the feeling of being completely focused despite an audience or other scening going on nearbye. For me, it can be an enhancement. *I have never done any form of public play, so have no legitimate opinion here, yet (and no built-in predjudices, either). - Susan

Caretakr -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 12:03:09 PM)
I have to like people in an audience to enjoy exhibition. If there is anyone watching that I don't like-the thought that I am giving them any enjoyment ruins it for me.

Bearlee -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 12:11:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Caretakr I prefer those who can suffer a bit to the happy masos. So it's a bit of both. Yes, I know what you mean. Someone called me a 'mental masochist' yesterday! I got all insulted and felt like pouting cuz I'll stand for him while he leaves long welts with a single-tail or cane... 'That's not physical enough?', I asked. He just laughed and said 'Yeah, but you don't LIKE the pain...you're just willing to suffer for me.' And he likes that part very much, is seems. [:)] Course, it also may have had to do with that humiliation stuff... lordy!

Caretakr -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 12:14:56 PM)
Orwell summed up my feelings on Domination and Sadism in this quote from 1984: quote: 'The real power, the power we have to fight for night and day, is not power over things, but over men.' He paused, and for a moment assumed again his air of a schoolmaster questioning a promising pupil: 'How does one man assert his power over another, Winston?' Winston thought. 'By making him suffer,' he said. 'Exactly. By making him suffer. Obedience is not enough. Unless he is suffering, how can you be sure that he is obeying your will and not his own? Power is in inflicting pain and humiliation. Power is in tearing human minds to pieces and putting them together again in new shapes of your own choosing. [;)]

Bearlee -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 12:16:56 PM)
Damn! I think you scare me sometimes, Caretakr! bearlee

peta -> RE: How Far Can A True Sadist Really Go? Just Curious (7/21/2006 5:42:20 PM)
He scares nicely though. peta

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