RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus

RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (Full Version)

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wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 1:35:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP There is no relationship between that and getting an unwanted email from a guy who thinks talking about your physical attributes is complimentary. It isn't. The fact that you drool upon seeing a woman's cleavage is not a compliment. Far from it. Or that you have a think for women with that color and length of hair. We are no more required to respond to creepy come ons than we are to stay on the line with a cold call salesperson to thank them for their offer of vacuum cleaner demonstration when we aren't planning to accept it. In fact, by not wasting your time, we're probably being politer than if it were the opposite. The distance between what you and I are talking about is so great that it cannot be measured. But it is over-generalizations like this that bolster people in their misconception that unsolicited email is inherently a bad thing. Are you really that offended by an email that says something like, "We aren't close, but I just wanted to say that you have a very nice smile" or "We aren't seeking the same thing, but you express yourself very well in your profile"?

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 1:43:36 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact Let's keep in mind that I didn't call you a dumbass. What I am saying that you and I see the matter differently. You have made that quite clear. You only see worth in being pleasant to someone if it somehow benefits you. I am of no benefit to you, so it is quite disingenuous of you not to call me a dumbass.

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 1:45:31 PM)
I must say. I find it uproariously hilarious to read multiple unsolicited responses in defense of not responding to unsolicited email.

Wayward5oul -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 2:11:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez I must say. I find it uproariously hilarious to read multiple unsolicited responses in defense of not responding to unsolicited email. Actually, starting a thread in a public forum is inviting responses. So in this case, you did solicit comments. That does not mean that they have to agree with you.

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 2:35:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez I must say. I find it uproariously hilarious to read multiple unsolicited responses in defense of not responding to unsolicited email. Actually, starting a thread in a public forum is inviting responses. So in this case, you did solicit comments. That does not mean that they have to agree with you. Um, no. It actually doesn't inherently mean solicitation of responses. A post in a public forum often entails that, but not always. And the OP definitely did not. In contrast, messages sent directly to one individual are soliciting a response. So, with the exception of having everything completely bass-ackwards, you are exactly correct.

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 2:43:02 PM)
Went to my "Who's Viewing me?" page today. Saw a new picture there. I opened the profile to discover someone who is a sub, is over 2000 miles away, and is 22 years my junior. In short, we are triply non-beneficial to each other. I sent her the following note: quote: I saw that you viewed my profile. I'm guessing that you saw me on the message boards. In any event, I just wanted to say that you have stunning eyes and a beautiful smile, and that the sight of your picture on my "Who's Viewing me?" page brightened my day. Seven minutes later, she responded, confirming that the message boards are where she discovered me, and thanking me for the compliments. Now is that so hard, bubbeleh?

LadyPact -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 3:01:29 PM)
You have the time to send an email to everyone who shows up on the "who's viewing" list?

Wayward5oul -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 3:52:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez quote: ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez I must say. I find it uproariously hilarious to read multiple unsolicited responses in defense of not responding to unsolicited email. Actually, starting a thread in a public forum is inviting responses. So in this case, you did solicit comments. That does not mean that they have to agree with you. Um, no. It actually doesn't inherently mean solicitation of responses. A post in a public forum often entails that, but not always. And the OP definitely did not. In contrast, messages sent directly to one individual are soliciting a response. So, with the exception of having everything completely bass-ackwards, you are exactly correct. If responses are not wanted, then people should post their thoughts in their journal. That way it is there for all to see, yet no way to comment unless they send unsolicited emails that can be ignored. Pretending that posting in a public forum specifically designed for discussion is not an invitation for discussion is what is bass-ackwards.

Greta75 -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/13/2016 4:06:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez Are you really that offended by an email that says something like, "We aren't close, but I just wanted to say that you have a very nice smile" I don't know, I won't reply to this one at all. It's a bit creepy coming from a strange guy online. The other one, depending on my mood. Because if we aren't into the same thing, I usually can't be bothered to start a conversation unless I was seriously bored when I saw that. Anyway, this is not exclusively a woman's thing. Many men, basically all humans will only respond to what reaches them in a place where they feel the desire to respond. If a woman loves compliments about her physicality, she will respond to your compliments. But if she does not find that mentally stimulating as an introductory message, like for me, I tend to respond to people who mentally stimulate me with questions that make me think. That would confirm a response from me.

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 1:55:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact You have the time to send an email to everyone who shows up on the "who's viewing" list? No. Where did I say anything even approximating that?

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:04:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez Are you really that offended by an email that says something like, "We aren't close, but I just wanted to say that you have a very nice smile" I don't know, I won't reply to this one at all. It's a bit creepy coming from a strange guy online. Why would someone post a personal pic if they're creeped out by polite commentary on it? quote: ORIGINAL: Greta75 Anyway, this is not exclusively a woman's thing. Never said it was. My sole (and repeated) experience of unreplied emails is from women, and I've heard many other guys lamenting about the same thing. So I can't give any useful commentary on how guys act. But I do not doubt that many of them are just as rude.

wannapleez -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:09:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez quote: ORIGINAL: Wayward5oul quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez I must say. I find it uproariously hilarious to read multiple unsolicited responses in defense of not responding to unsolicited email. Actually, starting a thread in a public forum is inviting responses. So in this case, you did solicit comments. That does not mean that they have to agree with you. Um, no. It actually doesn't inherently mean solicitation of responses. A post in a public forum often entails that, but not always. And the OP definitely did not. In contrast, messages sent directly to one individual are soliciting a response. So, with the exception of having everything completely bass-ackwards, you are exactly correct. If responses are not wanted, then people should post their thoughts in their journal. That way it is there for all to see, yet no way to comment unless they send unsolicited emails that can be ignored. Pretending that posting in a public forum specifically designed for discussion is not an invitation for discussion is what is bass-ackwards. Your reading comprehension skills are sorely lacking. At no time did I cite an instance where responses were not wanted. I said that posting in a forum is not an inherent call for responses. If you want to hold on to the definition that these fora are always and inherently "specifically designed for discussion", I can't dissuade you from that.

Cinnamongirl67 -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:23:32 PM)
Hmmmm. I rarely get any mail at all and I wouldn't get creeped out by someone saying nice smile. But I'm not advertising either. I don't have an inviting profile plus you can only see the back of my head... So maybe I would get creeped out and paranoid if they said nice smile.[:D]

Wayward5oul -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:30:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Cinnamongirl67 Hmmmm. I rarely get any mail at all and I wouldn't get creeped out by someone saying nice smile. But I'm not advertising either. I don't have an inviting profile plus you can only see the back of my head... So maybe I would get creeped out and paranoid if they said nice smile.[:D] I don't have any pics up here, but I do on other sites, and anyone who sends me a 'nice smile' comment or something along those lines usually gets a polite thank you in reply. Its the ones where they say they want to cut your boobs off with a rusty knife that are likely to get ignored. True story. lol

Cinnamongirl67 -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:36:06 PM)
Ohhhhhhh my.... What a turn on. How come you get to have all the fun? I'll get my tetanus shot up to date just in case I get any hot emails like that.

Wayward5oul -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 2:38:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez If you want to hold on to the definition that these fora are always and inherently "specifically designed for discussion", I can't dissuade you from that. You are correct in that part at least. You can't dissuade me from that, nor anyone else who can read a dictionary. Do you even know 'forum' means? Or where the word came from?

LadyPact -> RE: yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus (2/14/2016 4:54:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wannapleez Why would someone post a personal pic if they're creeped out by polite commentary on it? Big shock. I have an answer. Most presenters have a personal pic. It's so attendees can recognize you outside of formal class time. My wax class happens to be in the same time slot as that really cool rope class that you want to go to so you can learn new knots, but you still have those wax questions you've been thinking about... How do you know me from the hundreds of other people at the con? It doesn't mean that I want people (figuratively) humping my leg through email.

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