RE: Age is a issue now..

RE: Age is a issue now.. (Full Version)

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siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/5/2004 4:27:54 PM)
Well, I see that no one is going to be able to talk any sense into you. I will have to agree with afmvdp on this one and write you off as yet another troll. You argue in circles and make points that are not even worth arguing. From what I understand it's ok for you to speak your mind, but as soon as someone speaks out against you you attack them calling them lazy? As I mentioned before, being high profile has nothing to do with anything, it has to do with what sticks out in people's minds. People don't remember the serious, mature ones, they remember that ones that make an ass out of themselves. Those people then judge everyone in that group by the actions of the assholes. That is natural human nature, we build schemas, these schemas are created based on the behavior of a few people (usually the not-so-nice ones). These schemas become stereotypes, which, in turn, become stigmas. This is the way that humans are, this is how we learn and develop from the time that we are infants. This "debate" (if it can be called that) is over for me. You have attacked my religion and that is unacceptable. If you wish to continue this you can apologize for attacking my faith and we can continue. Or, if I used too big of words for you to understand please feel free to ask for clarification.

happypervert -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/5/2004 5:25:29 PM)
quote: I'm still an asshole, though. That's about the only thing you've written that makes sense to me. Unfortunately, that is one trait that is unrelated to age. Good luck!

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/5/2004 5:28:48 PM)
quote: That's about the only thing you've written that makes sense to me. Unfortunately, that is one trait that is unrelated to age. heehee, I have to agree with you there. I love your signature too, it's cute and true [:D]

proudsub -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/5/2004 5:52:11 PM)
quote: I love your signature proudsub, it's so true. Thank you[:D]

RiotGirl -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/5/2004 10:24:07 PM)
Access Denied

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/6/2004 6:04:01 AM)
quote: ...but I think your response shows nothing but disrespect by relating something that some of us "kids" take likely more seriously than most of the so called "adults" we should be taking our mentoring from. Thanks but no thanks. This is confusing, I guess I did not read it properly before. If I showed disrespect then I apologize, that was not my intent and I still don't see it. My comment about my 7 years of experience not mattering was merely something that I have said many times and it has always been ignored, but when an older lifestyler says it they get paid attention to. That is all I was trying to say. If someone can explain to me where the disrespect was that would be wonderful because I still don't see it.

afmvdp -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/6/2004 8:10:08 AM)
That response was directed at lilserenity, the starter of this thread in her referencing of creating a bdsm board game so us "young" people can pretend and play at home. Which I found laughable as I had been in the life 3 years longer than her at nearly half her age. I apologize for any confusion in this matter.

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/6/2004 9:04:26 AM)
Oh, ok, I misunderstood. I thought that you were saying that my reply to the thread was disrespectful and I did not mean it to be so. A bit sarcastic perhaps, but not disrespectful. Thanks for the clarification [:)]

harmony3709 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 3:04:47 AM)
Most people have preferences in whom they chose to date, whether it be age or some other issue, such as certain areas of interest with regard to play or preferring a monogomous relationship versus a poly, etc. This is strictly a matter of personal preference and if someone prefers someone younger, someone older, the same age.......why should that matter or anyone take offense to this or worse, ridicule or insult those whom you don't happen to be attracted to, but they were attracted to you? With regard to socializing in general, making friends, becoming part of the same lifestyle organization -- sure, it would be great if we could all just get along and be one big happy *tolerent* family.....but the fact is that probably just ain't gonna happen any time soon. Debating the fact is unlikely to change a closed mind -- however, it is extremely ineffective to argue that making generalizations are wrong and then in the very same post become the generalizer (albeit unlikely a word) and verbally slam a segment of the population.....as I've seen in so many of the posts in this thread. There are differences in stages of life -- my teenagers roll their eyes at things I say and do........I roll my eyes at things my parents say and do.......it's part of where we are at that time in our life's journey, our knowledge, our experience, our perspective. So what is wrong with this? Why become defensive about it? It's who you are and exactly where you should be. You don't need to defend yourself, nor take the offense either. Tolerence, folks, tolerence. Be as willing to have an open mind about a new idea or concept or perspective as you are to trying a new toy. Play safe and be well, (all youngsters and oldsters) harmony

lovingmaster45 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 3:26:46 AM)
I ahve resisted adding my 2 cents in this thread; but cannot hold it any longer. First let me say I agree with Merc; age does make a difference. BUT... I have had some wonderful exceptions to the rule. I started early; I was 15; she was my 25 y/o HS typing teacher. I became her sex slave. We were caught. My Mother was the Chair of the school board that fired Mistress Cathy. I was sent to a Methodist retreat (Lake Junaluska in NC) for "christian counseling". You all can see how that turned out. If I were King, all 15 y/o males would be assigned to 30 y/o females for training and all 15 y/o females would be assigned to 30 y/o males for training. The "pairing" would last 15 years. Then it would be time to switch leaving the 45 y.o folks the freedom to pursue a "mature" relationship. I have been married for 10 years to a woman (Head Bitch Barbie is 40, for those of you who were at Black Rose) who is younger than my daughter and my sub is younger than my granddaughter (sub danielle is 20.). I have had a sub who was 60 and I have trained a sub who was 16. Both these were "exceptions". My preference is for women between 35 and 45; but I will never let my preferences interfere with a great relationship. My advice; be open to life. But do not tolerate fools in any age group. Anyone, regardless of age who lives an on-line existence in this lifestyle is not worth my time. And the Gor segment to me is a lot like the "trekkies" I see at the Star Trek conventions. They have a fantasy life because it is easier than getting a real personality.

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 5:51:22 AM)
While I understand that people have preferences in everything and I understand that, so do I, what I am upset about is that people automatically put younger people in the dumb and inexperienced group. In my case, I usually have more real life experience then many of these individuals. I generally don't throw this fact into their face unless they throw something into mine. I am a relatively passive person unless something really gets me. The thread got to me. People talking aobut the unexperienced players on this site and generalizing about all the young people. afmvdp and I spent some time defending the younger age braket, stating that there are serious young people, and some have more experience then the older people that were talking about them. Then karmaslave had to come in and make a fool out of himself and show that, indeed, young people are immature and stupid. This really got to me, but I was going to let it go and think of it as a joke. When asked, however, he stated that he was serious so I had to make a post. In his next post he attacked my faith so I have now blocked him and consider this over. I missed the part where I verbally slammed a portion of the population. Were you talking about where I said that "people like you are the reason that we aren't taken seriously"? Because that is not a generalization (at least not according the the definition of generalization that I was given, if you have a different one or if you are refering to another statement please share)

proudsub -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 9:35:52 AM)
quote: I started early; I was 15; she was my 25 y/o HS typing teacher. I became her sex slave. We were caught. My Mother was the Chair of the school board that fired Mistress Cathy. There was an incident like that here in WA and the teacher was convicted of statutory rape and went to prison for 7 yrs. Your teacher was lucky that being fired was all that happened.

Destinysskeins -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 11:18:23 AM)
Greetings, Just some background information so that my opinions can be given a reference point... i'm divorced, single mother of two children, white and 26 yo. i either initiated or posted a query in a previous thread (damn CRS disease but i can't remember which it was offhand) a thread regarding ways in which to find BDSM events which cater to my own age range. i did so after becoming fed up with attending events in which i was viewed as one of a slight number of superior prospects by members of quite a considerable age difference to myself. This feeling is akin to being the only seal swimming around in a pool of sharks. At the time i desired an opportunity to be in an environment with my peers in which i could relate to them, enjoy spending time with them and partake in activities that held mutual interest for all. Does this mean that i did not wish to spend time with those in older age brackets? Nope. Does this mean that i'm incapable of doing so in an appropriate manner. Nope. Does this mean that i felt the desire to go somewhere with others in my own age bracket (whom i've limited access to do such due to my family committments) from time to time? Hell, yeah! Finally, do i think that my marital status, number of children, racial background and age have anything to do with what i'm posting other than to serve as a valid reference point? shrugs whatcha think?

Mercnbeth -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 12:15:47 PM)
quote: Finally, do i think that my marital status, number of children, racial background and age have anything to do with what i'm posting other than to serve as a valid reference point? shrugs whatcha think? One of the reasons I never post a response to a post without first looking at their profile is for just this reason. I think having a reference point is important not only for the poster but for the responder. I know some of my comments are influenced by the profiler's information. For example, if someone's profile indicates that they are from LA and can't find a lifestyle club, I'd know they never looked. But the same post from Crosswicks Creek, Montana may generate a different reply. Regarding age, well that too is a valid reference. Speaking only for myself, having had my first lifestyle experience in my teens, at 20 I would have resented any 30 year 'old fart' telling me how I should act. But I know my resentment would have been muted and I also know I was at least open to the possibility that I had more to learn. And since back then, clubs were few and far between, I didn't want to get kicked out of places I wanted to be, and lose my access to lifestyle people. Now there are many, many, many more options. I think now the issue isn't that the older group resents the younger or even envies them, I think its the manner of how the conflict in opinion is argued. I think it comes down respect. I place a very high value on respect. In my heritage and upbringing, people and other's positions and possessions were respected. You can lose all your money and possessions but if your respect is challenged and you don't defend it, then you are truly bankrupt. And I find more often now, that there are a large majority of the self identified TNG, that don't respect the groundwork laid for them by us older folk. Well, this old folk for one, won't, and really can't permit that in my life. Maybe some will see this as a conflict in what I've previously said, but I do not discount anyone because of their age. But when people indicate their immaturity and lack of respect in their conversation, correspondence, or posts; I don't waste any effort in responding. That holds true regardless of age. It's just that more often the age of a person meriting such disdain is under 30. Finally, I think confidence has a lot to do with the adamancy of the argument to the age issue. When you are less sure of your argument people tend to raise their voice to make up for their lack of validity. I wish I could give credit to it's author and quote it exactly, being old does allow for the excuse of senility, but I truly do live with this perspective in mind; "When I was younger I KNEW I knew everything. Now I know I know NOTHING."

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 12:21:33 PM)
It's not that I am not willing to learn or that I resent the older crowd. I dislike that I am immediatly judged by my age, without taking into consideration my experience, my knowledge and what my opinions are. I know that I have much more to learn, but I also know that I am more experienced then some of the people that reject my opinion based on my age.

perverseangelic -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 3:04:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: siamsa24 It's not that I am not willing to learn or that I resent the older crowd. I dislike that I am immediatly judged by my age, without taking into consideration my experience, my knowledge and what my opinions are. I know that I have much more to learn, but I also know that I am more experienced then some of the people that reject my opinion based on my age. Seconded. I get frustrated by the fact that what I say cannot be accepted as what I think -now-. So many people tell me "you'll learn more, you'll think differently." Yes, I will, and I will embrace that when it comes, but this is how I think -now-. I dislike that my "now" often can't be taken as such.

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 3:55:28 PM)
quote: "you'll learn more, you'll think differently." grrrrr, I hate that. I get that all the time from my mother and from my man. I may think differently later, but this is how I think now and that's what's important to me. I may be an idealistic college student, but isn't having new ideas and being willing to fight for them the way that things get done?

LadySonelle -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 4:12:37 PM)
Quite a lot of judgement going on here. "Little tykes" "missing their moms" etc... Tch! We all have to start somewhere. I am 52 years old and I find peopole making comments sucs as "cankles" "granny" "old woman"! We really ought to simply relate to people as people, not ages, dress sizes, shoe styles, etc. Remember, you can always learn something new from someone else, no matter who they are, how old they are or even how intelligent they are. Lessons come from some VERY unlikely places. Lady Sonelle Still learning!

Mercnbeth -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 4:17:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: siamsa24 quote: "you'll learn more, you'll think differently." grrrrr, I hate that. I get that all the time from my mother and from my man. I may think differently later, but this is how I think now and that's what's important to me. I may be an idealistic college student, but isn't having new ideas and being willing to fight for them the way that things get done? Would you rather they smile and nod knowingly and not say anything? Both you and perverseangelic communicate your thoughts intelligently and maybe you should consider anyone who uses your age perspective as an argument against you as a 'victory'. That means that they can't find anything else in your opinion to disagree. If CollarMe still exists 20 years from now and you are still posting remember not to use age as a debate point when the new breed of life-stylers address you and you reflect on what it was like back at the turn of the century! Meanwhile - ENJOY!

siamsa24 -> RE: Age is a issue now.. (12/7/2004 4:23:26 PM)
I would just rather that my opinion wasn't dismissed the same way that you may dismiss the opintion of a child. Just to kind of pat them on the head and basically say "oh, how cute, you want to have an opinion too. Look honey, little so-and-so wants to be like the grown-ups" I am considered an adult in every aspect except for that of my opinons, thoughts and ideas (with the exception of the academic world, I just submitted my first paper for publication, wish me luck [:D] ).

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