LadyPact
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quote:
ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA
I've read that men could view 50 female profiles, who are all within age and distance range, and be attracted to most all and send out emails. A woman could look at 50 male profiles, who are all within age and distance range, and not be attracted to any of them. I've also read that even though an attractive female could be hounded by 100's of men, she may not be attracted to any of them. I've read posts on this site saying the same thing. Even attractive women have a hard time meeting men because she may not be attracted to anyone who is "hitting" on her.
Not terribly sure that I agree with attractive women having a hard time meeting men unless they are going by the *quality* of men that are often found on sites and most men fish with the wrong bait. I'll explain that.
The reason the guy views 50 female profiles and be attracted to most of them is because (generally) men are visual. They see the picture, think the woman is attractive, and that's enough to prompt his interest. Women, on the other hand, (again, generally) are more attracted to mental and emotional connection. When that's lacking, the physical appearance doesn't matter as much. They want the guy that they feel is actually engaging with them. Let's face it. Kind of hard to do from a profile alone. Until the interaction happens where both people are connecting, that's absent for the woman.
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However, at the BDSM club I go to in Los Angeles, this just isn't true. It seems like most of the women are in relationships. The attractive women will only talk to attractive men and will snub anyone else. This is also true at the college I go to. Attractive women don't seem to have any problem meeting men and getting into relationships.
First things first. It happens to be my personal opinion that attractive women don't NEED the internet to find partners. (This is also a contributing factor on sites like this why there are fewer women on it than men.) They might use it for convenience or because they aren't interested in kink clubs or whatever but most of them don't really need it. I know it's a shock but dating really was a thing before the internet came along.
The kink club is going to be different than the internet. When couples go to the kink club, they are doing it for something that isn't at home. It might be the want to dress for an event, the social aspect, kink furniture or suspension points that they don't have at home, an evening away from the UMs that are at home... Whatever their reason. They go and know that they have a person to play with if they want to.
Single, attractive women who happen to be rope bunnies have no problem finding play partners. They just plain look good in rope, so male tops interested in rope are always wanting to scene with them. Female tops don't tend to have a problem, either. Particularly if they are good tops and folks at the club know them fairly well.
Single people going to the kink club, more often than not, are going to interact with the people who have something to do with why they went to the club in the first place. I think snubbing is a bad word for it because what they want from their night out is just as important to them as the reason you went to the kink club is important to you. You just may not be involved in that interest according to them, so they are going to prioritize their time related to why they went in the first place.
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Does anyone else see the discrepancy between what research and posts say and real life?
Not really because you are trying to compare apples and oranges. There's a lot of white noise on sites like this. Read any of the threads you'll ever find regarding emails from men that are horrible, lack effort, want instant gratification, and the stuff that most women are going to reject.
Research may say it but because I do have some interaction with some people in your age group in the local kink community, most of them that I know are dating and they aren't having difficulty doing it.
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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT
Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD
Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.
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It Seems Research Is Different Than Real Life? - 
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