longwayhome
Posts: 1035
Joined: 1/9/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: KL70
I saw this humorous list of stereotypical subs and was wondering if there's any other types.
Top 7 subs.
1. Poor Me sub : This sub always has something going wrong in her life. Of course, it's never her fault, as she's always being played upon and victimized by others. If only she found the perfect Dom, her life would be problem free and forever-blissful.
2. Just Do Me sub : This sub just wants to be beaten. It doesn't really matter by who, or what, as long as she or he can feel the lash. Frequently misbehaving on purpose, this sub can drive a Dom crazy.
3. Barbie sub : This sub likes the way she looks in leather fashions. She's afraid of the whip and has never seen a clamp in her life.
4. He Hurt me sub : This sub, without any negotiations, talks of limits or safewords, rushes out to play with a Dom she met 2 days ago online. After letting him tie her up and whip her, she decides he's a menace to society and can't wait to tell all her sub friends he's a bad Dom.
5. I Just Need a Man sub : This sub, after exhausting all her meeting places, decides the D/s world would be a good place to meet a man. She really has no interest in D/s, but just needs someone to spend the rest of her life with. She's a close relative of Poor Me sub. Amazingly, when she gets her Dom, she suddenly loses interest in any type of sex.
6. No one can top me sub : This sub longs to submit, yet claims no Dom is strong enough to top her, so is really just a Domme in disguise.
7. The 'submission is the greatest gift I can give' submissive : This submissive has stars in her eyes and naivity in her heart. She swoons at the mere thought of any Dom, asking her to pass the salt.
She writes her Dom's name in the corner of her notebook with little hearts and flowers around it. She declares there's no better way to love than through submission and that D/s is a better and higher manner of loving, than anything a silly old vanilla person might do. She lives on an emotional roller-coaster.
Fucking hilarious. Laugh - I almost did.
How about the "I'm fed up to the back teeth of subs and Dom/mes who do nothing but moan all the fucking time on these boards about how shit subs or Dom/mes are just because they can't get someone to put up with their self-important whinging and sense of entitlement sub".
Or the "Come back once you've worked out how to treat someone like a fully-formed human being instead of a cardboard cut-out sub".
You could go for the "I swear if I hear another drawn out thread ranting about scammers and findoms I'll remove my own liver and watch myself eat it sub"
Alternatively, I particularly like the "Get over yourself, get a life, get a partner or have a good hard shag then return more mellow sub"
Or even the grilled vegetables and cheese sub. Much less hassle, doesn't answer back and gives you a warm feeling inside.
... and breathe.
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RE: Top 7 sub list. Are there any more types ? - 
*rolls eyes* 
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