RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (Full Version)

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respectmen -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:25:22 PM)

So the OP is being criticised for having standards yet we are all suposed to accept women having standards....such as female standards not being met with 99 percent of men in this website.

I think judging women for being fatsos is mild compared to thinking 99 percent of a gender isn't good enough for you.




NoirMetal -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:25:36 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

how long has she been sposed to be "losing weight"
I need the laugh



1. I allowed her to move in with me about 6 months ago.
2. I've tried verbal abuse, physical punishment and humiliation
3. Nothing works and this is why I want to get rid of her

Try padlocking the reefer.




DesFIP -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:31:05 PM)

And the refrigerator.

How the hell is she supposed to lose weight with you filling the house with junk food and lying around all the time?
Try demonstrating healthy eating and exercise. Cook plant based meals and go for a two hour walk four days a week.





Lucylastic -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:33:57 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

how long has she been sposed to be "losing weight"
I need the laugh



1. I allowed her to move in with me about 6 months ago.
2. I've tried verbal abuse, physical punishment and humiliation
3. Nothing works and this is why I want to get rid of her


Yet you want another female to kick her out..
I was right, lol
Yeah, you are a treasure alright
domineering isnt the same as dominant. Or did your "mentor" tell you its the only way.




Lucylastic -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:41:16 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

So the OP is being criticised for having standards yet we are all suposed to accept women having standards....such as female standards not being met with 99 percent of men in this website.

I think judging women for being fatsos is mild compared to thinking 99 percent of a gender isn't good enough for you.


Abuse humiliation and physical punishment? is having standards? thats a high bar
*picking straw outta my teeth*





tamaka -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:48:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

So the OP is being criticised for having standards yet we are all suposed to accept women having standards....such as female standards not being met with 99 percent of men in this website.

I think judging women for being fatsos is mild compared to thinking 99 percent of a gender isn't good enough for you.


Abuse humiliation and physical punishment? is having standards? thats a high bar
*picking straw outta my teeth*




Actually that's what would cause a woman to eat more...as a coping mechanism to deal with the stressful environment. There's actually a term for it... it's 'armouring'. A woman will eat more to try to build protection. It's a subconscious coping mechanism.




peppermint -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 8:53:45 PM)

You need to check with your state to see what you need to do to legally evict her. In Montana you would need to give her 30 days written notice that is delivered to her by a process server. Only after the 30 days notice would you be able to bring in the sheriff to get her out.

To be frank, you sure sound like a horny net geek wussy.




Wouldyoucruelly -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/20/2017 11:20:04 PM)

Why not just talk to her, face to face. This is, for lack of better phrasing, a break up. In a break up, being honest and avoiding mind games will usually lead to the best outcome. In the situations where it does not, if you're the owner of the house, the law is on your side.

I vaguely understand dismissing her for failing to meet a goal, though the methods used to progress that goal are questionable. Really, if you can't lead yourself to make a decision, whether right or wrong, what makes you think you are able to lead others? I hope you gain the courage necessary to do so.




Greta75 -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 12:09:42 AM)

FR

Few questions.

While you have an agreement with her that she needs to lose 30lbs if she wants to be with you and I assume she has agreed to this.

But what was the time duration she was given to lose this 30lbs?

And did she promise she will lose it by herself? Or did she expect you to micro-manage her weight loss?

Because if she expected you to micromanage her weight loss.

I suggest, changing her diet to, eating nothing but fresh lettuce and cucumber all day, or any raw green leafy vegetables that is edible without dressing. No dressing allowed. She can eat as much of that as she can, snack all day on that all she wants. If she needs dressing, freshly squeezed lemon juice or balsamic vinagrette is all she is allowed.

And Baked salmon for dinner every night. She can use extra virgin olive oil to drizzle on it abit.

And at least 4 Litres of plain sugarless water or lemon water, green tea a day. Just make sure it's all sugarless.

She is gonna lose that weight. You will see results in one month. No exercise needed. You can try to make her do that for a month and if she breaks the diet, she moves out. She is not allowed to eat anything else but those 2 items.

It's a very difficult diet to keep with. A friend of mine who was told he either goes on this diet, or prepare to die. Has lost more than 200lbs in one year on this diet prescribed by his doctor. So he kept it up, because it was his life or live.

But I'm sure she couldn't keep it up as motivating factors probably aren't strong enough. So if you put her on this diet, and tell her she has move out IF she breaks even any bit of it.

You solve your problem. Those are your terms. And if she religiously keeps to this diet, she will lose 30lbs.

PS: As a submissive, I would never be with a dominant who tells me, he wants me to lose weight. So to me, this woman AGREED to this silly term before she moved in. So I have no sympathy for her. But she might be hoping this dominant could be her free personal trainer.





DaddySatyr -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 12:37:27 AM)


Normally, since you did this by the numbers, I would, as well, but I am going to combine numbers "1" and "2"

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA

1. I agreed to let a female submissive to live with me.
2. In our agreement, she will lose 30 pounds.



Well, if the thirty pounds was such an issue, why didn't you insist the weight be lost before you allowed her to move in. As an addendum: why did you allow her to move in, in the first place?

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA

3. I've tried everything possible but she hasn't lost one pound!!



Has it occurred to you that the idea of the "plateau" is a very real phenomenon and that there's a "perfect weight" (health and happiness of the individual) which might not meet up with your obviously high standards?

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA

4. I want her to get out but she says she loves me.



Here's where you get to decide if being loved or being happy is more important to you.

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA

5. How do I get her out?



Nut up, buttercup. Be a man and tell her to get out. If she won't leave, call the authorities. DO NOT allow her to have mail delivered to your house or (in most states) she will be considered to have "taken up residence".



quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA

I'm currently seeking for another female submissive to move in. Hopefully she can kick her out.



What a pussy.



Michael




respectmen -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 12:53:59 AM)

Men get abused/ridiculed all the time for male undesirability. Such as living with mummy, having no job, being a loser in general.

I bet people would be singing a whole different tune if a woman mentioned that she made a deal with a man. The deal was he had to move away from his mum if they started dating. If he failed to do so, even people in here would be ridiculing the said man.







DaddySatyr -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 12:59:52 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen

Men get abused/ridiculed all the time for male undesirability. Such as living with mummy, having no job, being a loser in general.

I bet people would be singing a whole different tune if a woman mentioned that she made a deal with a man. The deal was he had to move away from his mum if they started dating. If he failed to do so, even people in here would be ridiculing the said man.



That may be true of some people. In fact, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and stipulate that it's true of most people, here.

That said, I am one of the last people on the planet to hand out "pussy passes".



Michael




ResidentSadist -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 3:23:35 AM)

I just wondered if you mentioned it to her? Like, "hey babe, remember that deal we made. Well, it appears you have chosen not to keep it. So I want you to move with 30 days."


quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA


quote:

ORIGINAL: Lucylastic

how long has she been sposed to be "losing weight"
I need the laugh



1. I allowed her to move in with me about 6 months ago.
2. I've tried verbal abuse, physical punishment and humiliation
3. Nothing works and this is why I want to get rid of her





UninhibitedDom -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 7:00:03 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA



1. I allowed her to move in with me about 6 months ago.
2. I've tried verbal abuse, physical punishment and humiliation
3. Nothing works and this is why I want to get rid of her


1. No you didn't. You took responsibility for providing a fudamental human need for another person. We need shelter, it's not a luxury. Presuming you didn't find her in a skip that need was being met by someone else, either herself or another previously and you took on that responsibilty. You made meeting that need conditional on her losing weight. Now thats retarded right off the bat but thats a seperate discussion. The time to discuss and agree how she will move out is before she moves in. By placing condionality on the roof over her head you or she need to be able to ensure the money or contacts are in place that she can move out if she doesn't meet that conditionality. You clearly failed to do so. Your fuckup.

2. You said she said she loves you. So theres oxytocin getting chucked about and unfortunately for her shes bonded with you. Probably by complete accident you are hitting her buttons. All of those things are fun for someone who's got in the right frame of mind especially with someone they think they love. They will be hitting her reward receptors. So they are fuck all use as motivation other than by withholding them. You weigh by your own admission 50% more than you think you should at an age when you should be fit for military service so I'm guessing you like food. If I throw you a bucket of fried chicken everytime you post some insipid shite what am I motivating you to do? Post more vacuous crap. I am guessing when you got together you told her some bollocks about how you would 'make' her lose weight with your Domly superpowers. What you've actually done is reward her for not losing weight. Well fucking done skippy.

3. So your profile says Dom. You're not. But thats not the issue. The issue is you're not an adult. Look at your profile and your posts. Wahh my sub won't lose weight. Wahh I can't get rid of her. Wahh want a new one that does what I say. Wahh i'm fucking seven. Thats embarrassing at 26, and until you get a grip it will get more embarrassing as you get older. Man up and take responsibilty. Assuming she actually wants to lose 30lbs and that 6 months was the agreed time you owe the girl 6 months at least from when you start actually helping her to do what you have asked her to do. I'm not a weight loss expert but its basically diet and exercise. Diet, if the house is full of fatty food and snacks whose responsibility is that? Yours. So sort your diet out and that will help her. Lead from the front. Exercise, do it together. Put in the miles on the bike with her, the lengths at the pool whatever your exercises of choice are. Together. Be a role model not a bully. In general and especially since you've made such a hash of it keep the Sm side completely seperate. Thats stuff you should be doing cos its fun for both of you. If you link withdrawing it to failure to lose weight if she struggles at times to keep losing weight and people do it just means less fun for both of you and thats a negative motivational source for both of you. Buy her a nice dress every time she drops 2lbs would be an example of positive motivation, but as I said i'm not an expert and I don't know the girl. Get to know her and start treating her like a human being and you'll figure out what hits her reward centres. Stop trying to lure some other poor sod into your lair to make sex at and focus on the person who against all the odds personality wise loves you.

You may never be a Dom. Or you might be a great Dom one day. Thats down to you, but its not essential either way. What is essential is being a man. So you can carry on drifting round the interwebs asking random people which Dom form you need to fill in to shitcan a sub cos she seems to be broken, or you can start taking baby steps towards growing up. Your call, and you have to live with the consequences. Whether you make it work with her or you find someone else or you're alone theres only one face going to look back at you in the mirror for the rest of your natural. Its in your hands whether thats the face of a man or a petulant little boy.




Greta75 -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 7:08:23 AM)

Honestly right..., there is something wrong with this chick who is "inlove" with a man who practically told her that she needs to lose weight to be with him. I can't even imagine ever loving such a man. It's such an asshole thing to do. How can she possibly fall inlove with THAT?

End of the day, such women with esteem problems are precisely for predator dominants like him.

That's why, I always say, women with low-esteem issues is not suitable to be a submissive, because to me, submissive need to be strong and self-assured. As you are dealing with dominants. They would take advantage of you, if you are weak and then get like no respect at all. It's a very strange thing. End of the day, healthy dominants want healthy submissives.

So all the fucked up dominants are gonna go for these vulnerable and fucked up submissives too.




WickedsDesire -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 7:32:13 AM)

Sometimes I weigh up all the information available to me.
The Ops profile, his posting history, and words and how they employ them

Sometimes I weigh up all the information available to me.
The Ops profile, his posting history, and words and how they employ those words...and i am undecided, so the benefit of the doubt rule will my applied

How does one end a relationship? You do it by telling them its over - this can be very complicated, or the repercussions etc. Nor should anyone hurl anyone onto the street - unless there is a good immdetate reason for them to do so: abusive etc

How does one lose weight - now that is actually very easy. Unless there is an underlying health problems. Is there? It will not be accomplished by calling someone a fat cunt or a fuking mess.

greta75 a very,very good point End of the day, such women with esteem problems are precisely for predator dominants like him crossed my mind to did that. beig alone is a lonely existence and few people are capable of that...and I am about 2 years sooneth. most people go the other way try anything, or try everything - a destructive cycle methinks

RM I am not going to disagree with you either but the relevancy of that to this thread escapes me a wee bit...is my who is the most shallow thread still abouty?

UninhibitedDom
- fair comment - as you took more time than anyone else on this one and backed that up with a lot of good sensible stuff.

And for the record OP there is no such thing as a "slave" ive explained this all before and the numbers..i had it about 1/10 000 women and perhaps 1/1000 men - the rascals




MissKatya -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 9:17:14 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA


quote:

ORIGINAL: MadamexSarah

Abuse does not equal domination or being a dom. Just because you are a jerk who likes to control how your partner looks (while you probably could stand to lose a few too), that doesn't make you a Dom in any sense.


I agree that abuse does not equal domination but abuse can be part of domination. I'm not a jerk because I want to control how my partner looks. I want her to lose weight and she wants to lose weight. It's mutual consent. So what if I'm overweight? I'm 300 pound and I should weight 200 pounds. So what? This isn't about me. This is about her.


They don't make socks like they used to.

Hiya Starbucks!




LadyPact -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 9:22:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: WMDom26CA
1. I agreed to let a female submissive to live with me.

OK. Since it's your house, I'm going to assume that you discussed with her what terms you had to begin with.

quote:

2. In our agreement, she will lose 30 pounds.

Unlike some of the other posters, I'm not going to give you crap about this. She agreed to it as one of the conditions of her living there.

quote:

3. I've tried everything possible but she hasn't lost one pound!!

Well, you probably haven't, but that's inconsequential. It would probably be easier for her to lose it if she wasn't around the bad food habits that you have or the junk food that's probably in you house. However, part of the responsibility is hers, too.

quote:

4. I want her to get out but she says she loves me.

Her loving you also doesn't have anything to do with it. Sorry, but whoever wants out of a dynamic wins. Nobody is required to stay with somebody just because one of the parties has emotions for the other.

quote:

5. How do I get her out?

Have you told her that you want out of the dynamic and want her to leave? If you have, is she refusing to leave? You might have to look into how to have her legally removed if it comes to that. Not enough information on what discussions you've had with her about it to really answer.

quote:

I'm currently seeking for another female submissive to move in. Hopefully she can kick her out.

This part, to me, is stupid. Why would you need a female submissive to handle this for you? The only thing I can come up with would be if somebody else already lived there or another person's name was on the lease/mortgage so that person has a stake in whoever lives in the house, too. Is the situation such that it would be in your best interest to have another party present when telling the woman that you want to end the dynamic, when you want her out by, or something like that? Not the same as having the third party do it for you but if you want someone to overhear the conversation, you could do that with anybody. I'm not saying to fail to CYA if it's necessary.

As for the rest, be practical about it. There should be some reasonable answer for where will she go. What was her living arrangement before she moved in with you? If she gave up her house/apartment to move in with you, she's going to need the time to find another one. If she sold or gave away her household items, she's going to have to take care of that, too. What is your financial arrangement for staying with you? If she gave you her financial contribution for the month, either give that money back or she should have the option to stay until the end of the month. If her name is on any of the utility bills and such, take her name off, so she'll have the ability to start services at her new residence. The very same stuff that non-kinky people do when something doesn't work out.





LadyPact -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 9:45:34 AM)

No idea why this posted twice. Sorry, folks.

ETA - Well, since it's here, anyway.

quote:

ORIGINAL: respectmen
Men get abused/ridiculed all the time for male undesirability. Such as living with mummy, having no job, being a loser in general.

I bet people would be singing a whole different tune if a woman mentioned that she made a deal with a man. The deal was he had to move away from his mum if they started dating. If he failed to do so, even people in here would be ridiculing the said man.

Inconsequential. It wouldn't have mattered if the OP had been female and the sub had been male. I'd have said the same thing.

Even if it's a troll post, look at the very specific way that everything is phrased. It's not "we moved in together". It's "agreed to let the other person live with me". The implication is that it's his house, not their house. Whether D/s is involved or not, whoever owns the house makes the rules.








NoirMetal -> RE: How To Dismiss A Submissive (3/21/2017 10:27:29 AM)

You only have to give notice if you have a rental agreement. Guests can be told to vacate at any time.




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