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Emotions and submission - 8/1/2006 8:17:15 PM

quietsub1955

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

i 'm writing to ask other submissives if they've experienced unexplainable emotions after being flogged, cropped, ect. by their Dom/Master. i know that i am not the first submissive to have emotions sneak up on her and i'm sure that i won't be the last. i'm hoping that in sharing this with other submissives, i can not only make sense out of these emotions, but to also help myself explore and search more deeply into myself to better understand not just the emotions, but my submission as well. i do not cry for no reason, nor is it easy for me to cry in front of anyone. i knew that the tears were not because He hurt me, physically, mentally or emotionally. i'm almost positive that the tears were not because the flogging was over and i survived it. i'm very sure that they were not due to post traumatic stress disorder. i strongly feel that the tears are due to sharing something so intimate with Master. Crossing what once was a barrier with Him, giving myself completely to Him, knowing that i was completely safe with Him, as well as knowing that He cares as deeply for me as i do Him. i feel that the tears are possibly a way for the intense, deep feelings to come out, especially because i don't think words could describe them. i look forward to hearing what others have experienced as well as their thoughts on unexplained emotions.thank you for taking the time to read this. ~quietsub1955~

Post #: 1

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/1/2006 8:23:22 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quietsub,

I know that you asked this of submissive, but...

Perhaps your experience was a cathartic one...something that enduces the spontaneous release of emotion, usually as tears or laughter. I am a student of, as well as a teacher of, cathartic flogging. I see this kind of thing, and experience this kind of thing, all the time. No need to worry.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 2

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/1/2006 8:30:36 PM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

I agree...I think there is a cathartic nature to the tears that come in this manner. I would also suggest that they come because you are in a situation where you feel free and safe to let them flow.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 3

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 4:53:57 AM

quietsub1955

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

Thank You MasterFireMaam and erin for replying to my post. i welcome input from A/all. It's not that i am worried about the emotions, but that i am trying to understand them.
Your suggestions that the tears are cathartic in nature sounds very reasonable, i do tend to keep my emotions from all but Master and a friend that i know i can trust completely. So, for my mind to purge emotions at that time makes perfect sense.

erin, i agree that feeling safe and free also enabled me to let my emotions out in the open.
Thank Y/you again for the kind and informative replies.

~quietsub~

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 4

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 5:53:04 AM

twicehappy

Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

Relax, tears are not uncommon after what you experienced, nor is laughter or a wide range of many other emotions.

For me immediately after i am simply limp and exhausted but that is usually followed by an intense mental awareness of my submission, a sort of gratitude to my owners, a feeling of closeness and love, of being safe.

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 5

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 6:02:21 AM

marieToo

Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: quietsub1955

i 'm writing to ask other submissives if they've experienced unexplainable emotions after being flogged, cropped, ect. by their Dom/Master. i know that i am not the first submissive to have emotions sneak up on her and i'm sure that i won't be the last. i'm hoping that in sharing this with other submissives, i can not only make sense out of these emotions, but to also help myself explore and search more deeply into myself to better understand not just the emotions, but my submission as well. i do not cry for no reason, nor is it easy for me to cry in front of anyone. i knew that the tears were not because He hurt me, physically, mentally or emotionally. i'm almost positive that the tears were not because the flogging was over and i survived it. i'm very sure that they were not due to post traumatic stress disorder. i strongly feel that the tears are due to sharing something so intimate with Master. Crossing what once was a barrier with Him, giving myself completely to Him, knowing that i was completely safe with Him, as well as knowing that He cares as deeply for me as i do Him. i feel that the tears are possibly a way for the intense, deep feelings to come out, especially because i don't think words could describe them. i look forward to hearing what others have experienced as well as their thoughts on unexplained emotions.thank you for taking the time to read this. ~quietsub1955~

During my first experiences with the physical aspects of Ds, ("sessioning", as some call it) I used to cry afterwards. Not uncontrollable sobbing or anything like that. Just a little soft quiet cry, having no idea why. Im still not sure why. It wasnt unhappiness or pain or anything of that sort. Maybe just a release of sorts.

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 6

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 6:04:30 AM

glimmer

Posts: 2
Joined: 2/7/2005
Status: offline

You could be my doppleganger. I feel so much love for my Dom after a beating, especially when he sweetly holds me in his arms as I weep. I am overcome.
Thank you for posting this.

Also, I think flogging triggers a hormonal reaction ... the body is, after all, in shock. And hormones can knock us for a loop.

sub glimmer

(in reply to marieToo)

Post #: 7

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 4:32:00 PM

quietsub1955

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

Thank you twicehappy, marietoo, and glimmer for your replies. i feel that i have a better understanding of these emotions and knowing that others go through similar emotions is comforting.

i'm sure that i will experience a variety of emotions as my submission deepens, and i know that my Master will guide me through what comes.

i am glad that this forum is here and that there are T/those that are not only willing to reply, but do so with compassion.

Thank Y/you again,
~quietsub~

(in reply to glimmer)

Post #: 8

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 5:24:31 PM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

Crying after an intense scene or big orgasm is normal for me. It's like it allows me to let go which I do noty day to day life.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 9

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 5:35:05 PM

angielouwhos

Posts: 87
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

For me the intense release of emotion is normal and often. It usually takes the form of crying for me, I cry easily and often. There are times though I will be giddy and laughing after an intense time.

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 10

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 5:48:42 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear quietsub1955, Ladies and Gentlemen;

The human body is rather a unique vessel, to which chemicals are within our body to which changes. Emotions are just one trigger to a series of changes of body chemestry inside and outside. Pheromones which are chemicals, mixing with adrenaline and or endorphines. The senses, such as smell which ties into the sense of smell and the olfaction glands also engage, with other senses, such as touch, hearing, sense of being can also be engaged.

Being primal, we're given these natural emotions, chemicals to which survival, such as 'gut instincts' or 'sense' also tap in when cornered and unable to escape and must endure impact. So, body's natural state of survival will engage as to preserve the host body.

Things such as love or hate are the two strongest emotions. Both can trigger a bout of crying for example. When the body is out of chemical balance from emotional means, the body corrects itself as to return into a less stressful state of 'being.' So, the body corrects itself to stay balanced as much as possible. A sigh, for example adds more oxygen into the blood stream and that feeds into the muscles as to give all the muscles a quick reset. Just like any body function, from coughing, sneezing, weeping, laughter, sighs--they are many adjustments the primal beast called 'human' goes back to it's most efficient state of being and efficient energy use. True, it may be a form of healing but, the start of that process comes within. The goal is peace, less stress, security, sense of self, joy, success and or happiness. Catharsis is the 'intent' of such external application as to create the domino effect that triggers your natural chemical 'balance' into motion. Each individual's recipe for that Catharsis moment will be different and will never be exactly the same the next time.

Hopefully this will assist you in understanding how Masters/Mistresses use the body to do wonderful and primal things to 'right' itself.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 11

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/2/2006 7:59:12 PM

babysburnin

Posts: 421
Joined: 2/16/2006
Status: offline

I cried during/after my first few sessions with my Dom. I understand what you are saying...nothing was wrong, so why did I cry?

I still don't know the answer to those first few times - I guess intensity. Now, if I cry, I know it's because we have hit on something - and it comes out when we are holding each other afterwards.

_____________________________

-Babysburnin

"Love is, above all else, the gift of oneself."
- Jean Anouilh

"The highest proof of virtue is to possess boundless power without abusing it."
- Lord Macaulay

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 12

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/3/2006 7:26:03 AM

quietsub1955

Posts: 6
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

thank Y/you bobbi, angielouwhos, Lady Hugs, and babysburnin for replying to my post.

To know that other submissives experience similar emotions helps me to accept these feelings and understand them better.

Lady Hugs, Your explanation was very informative and helped to shed a better understanding of how the body and mind work. Thank You for taking the time to share that.

i wish Y/you all well.

~quietsub~

(in reply to babysburnin)

Post #: 13

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/7/2006 4:36:28 PM

shahar

Posts: 8
Joined: 1/28/2006
Status: offline

I almost always cry after a session. Or during.. or before. It's not that I'm upset or anything, I just feel so........full of emotion, that the only way I can release that pressure is with tears. I enjoy the pain, I love knowing that I can take as much as is given and turn what is supposed to be "bad" into something useful. Sometimes in order to build ourselves back up, we have to break down what is left of our walls and our internal protections, and the tears are for that too, they cleanse and refresh a weary mind and help put things into perspective.

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 14

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/7/2006 5:39:15 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I agree...I think there is a cathartic nature to the tears that come in this manner. I would also suggest that they come because you are in a situation where you feel free and safe to let them flow.

Exactly, I had that exact experience this last weekend, with an old familar playmate, over a spanking. I love when it happens, as it's not a common occurance with me.

The way I judge these things is that if it is simply a cathartic experience, I'm usually feeling very happy and contented once it passes. If there is lingering emotional undercurrents, that don't subside fairly quickly, than I look within to see if it's anything more than just a release.

It's always wonderful to have these cathartic releases with a person who is adept and comfortable at recognizing them, and simply holds you, and whispers to you, and doesn't freak out, and think they've done something wrong.

(I loved hearing "You're safe, sweetheart, you're safe..." over and over, yesterday...Feeling mighty relaxed today! ::grin::)

_____________________________

Cin

quote:

My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 15

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/7/2006 6:07:45 PM

TNstepsout

Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline

Yes I turn into a blubbering mess and I hate it.

(in reply to Vancouver_cinful)

Post #: 16

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/7/2006 6:20:12 PM

Vancouver_cinful

Posts: 1911
Joined: 2/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: TNstepsout

Yes I turn into a blubbering mess and I hate it.

It's very hard to accept when you're a strong, proud person.

When it first happened I would fight it, or hide it, or apologize for it. But the doms I played with, were guite complimented that I could let go and be vulnerable with them. They were very happy to provide such a healing experience.

Now, I consider it something special that happens between two people who trust each other, and care about each other. They're treasured moments for me, now.

_____________________________

Cin

quote:

My Karma Account is huge, but I just can't seem to make a withdrawal!!

http://cinful.wordpress.com

(in reply to TNstepsout)

Post #: 17

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/8/2006 6:53:20 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

As others have stated, tears are a release of emotion. I laugh when I am beaten and it begins to really smart. It is the way I release the emotions I feel. I also laughed the day after my father died over something completely silly and stupid, and I couldn't stop laughing because I couldn't cry. It is the way the body or spirit releases pain sometimes. It just shows the depths of the emotions when we burst into laughter or tears at times like these.. and it is cathartic.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 18

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/8/2006 1:59:56 PM

crybaby

Posts: 28
Joined: 1/14/2005
Status: offline

Hey, quietsub, I once was told that crying during sex was a sign you were afraid of intimacy. Having given my virginity to my owners, I'm not sure if I would cry during sex with anyone else, but sometimes I find myself crying, not only after but during, just for the feeling that you couldn't be any closer, some one being inside you figuratively and literally. Sometimes I think I'm crying for feeling so good, for some one making me feel so good. Relieving, definitely. Ha, I'm mostly a sex slave so I realize you are talking about more than just during sex, but I can only input on what I know :)

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 19

RE: Emotions and submission - 8/11/2006 6:13:32 PM

boytoy4female

Posts: 103
Joined: 8/10/2006
Status: offline

Yes, unexplainable emotions is the name of the game. After an intense session, I often have what I call a "sub hangover". I've also learned that when I'm in the vanilla world, I can't try to analyze those emotions, because they make no sense to vanilla me. That's the gift we subs give

(in reply to quietsub1955)

Post #: 20

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