RE: Why?

RE: Why? (Full Version)

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MasterKalif -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 1:05:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross quote: ORIGINAL: MasterKalif Bear, I agree with you, a minimum politeness and correctness would be to reply something even if they are not interested. However you have a good attitude, if they don't reply they are the ones missing out, they are not worth anymore of your thoughts. As to why....I think many answered that question already. There is absolutely nothing within the realms of politeness and certainly not correctness which suggest that one has ANY obligation to return the solicitations of a complete stranger in an email format. If you want to be grateful for the ones who actually respond, then do so. But don't put the onus on the other person for responding to YOUR actions where none exists. I guess it's an irk of mine- people feeling they are obligated to a response. Why? Because YOU decide you want to write a stranger an email, that stranger SHOULD send you something back? Hardly. LuckyAlbatross there is never an "obligation" to do anything, however if the world acted in such a way, nothing would ever get done. My point was referred more to those profiles that say "I wont reply to any short responses or those that have not read my profile". Fair enough, then you actually write a thoughtful introduction after reading the profile carefully and still no reply....to which comes the question....why all that BS if she won't write any reply back regardless? If everyone took the attitude of being to shy or lazy to reply, then no one could get to know each other or reach an eventual relationship of some sort through CM. so my point is not that I feel "entitled" to some special reply or treatment, but rather that those submissives not write they wish long though-out responses if they don't even care...so you follow their rules of engagement and they do not uphold it...you do it short and sweet and you get complaints sometimes... In any case, I do not have this problem, but I can understand where Bear and others are coming from. Anyways there is no right or wrong over this, merely personal views, and courteousy.

MizSuz -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 5:14:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNbear Why is it that you send someone an email they read it, but do not respond back. I like to think that we are all adult here and can handle someone saying that they are not interested. Is it really that big of a deal? Bear, I see that you've gotten a lot of replies to this and I certainly won't beat the dead horse. However, I will share an exchange with you. My profile, in it's entirety, reads as follows: quote: BY DEFAULT I BLOCK ANYONE WHO EMAILS ME ASKING TO SERVE! NO DISCUSSION, NO SECOND CHANCE, YOU JUST GET BLOCKED. For clarity - NOT ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS FOR SERVICE AT THIS TIME and NO - THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT I WILL KEEP YOUR NAME AND CONTACT YOU WHEN I AM. Have a nice day. And this is the sort of email I often get (this is actually an edited cut and paste of a recent email): quote: Mistress, i am a slaved owned by Master {name removed}, he has asked me to contact you. i am a slave in need of punishment. Master would like me handed over to you. slut has earned many demerits and am to be punished. Master would like to watch me receive this gift from someone sucha s yourself. i need to feel the leather upon my butt, breasts and pussy. Master would like be bound tightly, gagged..whipped...flooged. Toys and plugs are to be used to open me greatly. This is not spam nor is it a joke, Master has asked slave to beg for this. If you are interested please respond, i have yahoo and aol instant messanger. Thank you for taking the time to read this. Now, I'll grant you that this email reads like a HNG poser looking for whack material, but how do I know that's what it actually is? When I wrote back (because they are local to me), which is something I usually don't do as I usually just block, I said "Where'd you get the idea I'd be interested?" "I can't imagine a responsible dominant wanting to give a valued sub or slave to someone they haven't even spoken to" "good luck in your search but I'm not your match" I got a nasty little reply back along the lines of "wow, you're having a bad day. Good luck you're going to need it" and I was blocked. I'm not sure what she/he thought I would need luck FOR as I think it's pretty clear I'm not looking. So tell me, considering the above scenario what exactly should I have bothered to respond to? I did respond, though, because they are local and I thought perhaps rather new to it all. So instead of just handling them as promised I took the time to address the email itself (proving I did read it) and respond with no thanks. As others on this thread have suggested, it just opened me up for nastiness. This is why I usually don't respond. Why bother? I don't ask for pornographic emails, but I certainly get more of those than I do of people politely inquiring about my health. The polite inquiries about my health and such I DO answer. But I think that people bringing their kink, uninvited, to my email box is just rude and I have no obligation to be kind or considerate in return.

TxBlkMistress -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 10:35:16 AM)
totally agree, I get a lot of that as well. And for those that think it's rude for no response, I think it's just a rude that you didn't respect my wishes. But I don't gripe about it, I just ignore them, life is waaaaay too short.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 11:09:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kedikat I have had the pleasure to meet people who are so unsullied by the disappointments of life, or somehow so oblivious and/or forgiving of them. It is like being in the blessed company of innocence and pure openess. I can't imagine how they remain thus, but love the time with them. They are rare. I resist my impulse to enlighten them to the real world. And leave them before I am too frustrated with them. They amaze and confound me. Though I love bhuddism, I guess I am far from Nirvana. I've met people like that too... They make me want to try harder/do better, but I too am far from reaching that point, because I'm not innocent, or always forgiving. I should add the disclaimer though that I'm in no way advocating for the ignorant wankers who cannot read or type with one hand to have their needs fed... M

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 12:03:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterKalif LuckyAlbatross there is never an "obligation" to do anything, however if the world acted in such a way, nothing would ever get done. Well my stipulations had nothing to do with the world. They were about a VERY specific context. quote: My point was referred more to those profiles that say "I wont reply to any short responses or those that have not read my profile". Fair enough, then you actually write a thoughtful introduction after reading the profile carefully and still no reply....to which comes the question....why all that BS if she won't write any reply back regardless? If everyone took the attitude of being to shy or lazy to reply, then no one could get to know each other or reach an eventual relationship of some sort through CM. Kalif have no worries- trust me, people respond to the emails they want to respond to. Whatever rules they say they go by or try to go by or any of that- they don't answer the emails they don't want to answer and they do answer the emails they do want to answer. We're in absolutely no danger of everyone simply being silent and having no email communication. quote: so you follow their rules of engagement and they do not uphold it...you do it short and sweet and you get complaints sometimes... Yup. Guess what? When you take the risk of emailing a complete stranger online...you risk them not ever responding, for whatever reason they want. When you take the risks of having your email inbox open to everyone, you risk getting emails you don't want also. quote: Anyways there is no right or wrong over this, merely personal views, and courteousy. See that's the problem- it's NOTHING to do with courtesy. There is NOTHING in the rules of courtesy which state that someone has ANY obligation to send ANY response to a complete random email from a cyber stranger.

MizSuz -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 4:37:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross See that's the problem- it's NOTHING to do with courtesy. There is NOTHING in the rules of courtesy which state that someone has ANY obligation to send ANY response to a complete random email from a cyber stranger. Hear here. It's all well and good if someone decides they prefer a certain amount of decorum and choose to observe it, even to expect it of those who have expressed a desire to please. It's a horse of a different color when someone expects others, who have not expressed that desire, to take on same.

cheshireboy -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 5:19:02 PM)
when i get e-mail, many of times, i won't reply back right then and there...i like to think out my responses first...or i am too busy doing something else....it may take me a hour or two...and hell, sometimes, when i am in evil mood....i won't reply back to just see if they are going to send one of those "I know you read My email you worthless slave, and you didn't even have the respect I deserve to reply back right then." I guess it is a way to test patience...and self esteem. cheshire.

LotusSong -> RE: Why? (8/6/2006 7:02:55 PM)
I got a email this morning from a sub that rread "Hi Ma'am". That was it. He had no profile. Nothing about him at all. Being my profile is clear that I am married and not looking, I wondered what would have enticed him to contact me in the first place. Was I to write back and ask about the weather or was he hoping I'd give him some cyber orders? So I thought of this thread and sent back 'Good Day to you too- And that was it..

doll -> RE: Why? (8/7/2006 3:38:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MistressOfGa Hi TNBear, First, welcome to the boards :) I don't think that whether we are are adult or not has anything to do with it. I try to answer all of my mail, even if it is just a quick "Hello back, I'm am not interested at this time". But, those types of responses seems to encourage even more mail from the person I just told I was not interested in, followed by an angry letter calling me names because I showed a lack of interest. <Shrug> Adult attitude? No, but an ego buster? For sure. I am not here to boost anyones ego up nor am I here to tear it down. I am here for my own reasons, some of which I share with others, some I don't. I don't have to sit through a telemarketing call and I most certainly do not have to open some piece of trash mail I got in my mailbox out in front of my house either. My best advice to you is, just move on and hopefully you will catch the eye of someone who DOES want to respond to you :) Guess I will have to start emailing you since you never get on yahoo anymore when I do and we don't get to talk on the phone....god I so miss our coffee breaks....you moving here yet??? And to bear....welcome to the forums and yes the unanswered emails get annoying, but they are about as annoying as the unwanted derogatory ones some here get. Good luck.

LTRsubNW -> RE: Why? (8/25/2006 5:54:38 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TNbear Why is it that you send someone an email they read it, but do not respond back. I like to think that we are all adult here and can handle someone saying that they are not interested. Is it really that big of a deal? Bear Bear...I believe you've answered your own question. For some (regards you) it would appear to be. (Maybe they're just not that into you). Ya know?

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