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Ex-wife tales - 8/5/2006 9:38:37 PM

HarryVanWinkle

Posts: 1720
Joined: 5/8/2006
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I divorced my first wife because of her filthy habits. Every time I'd go to piss in the kitchen sink, it was full of dirty dishes. My second wife died when she ate some poisoned mushroom. My third wife died of a brain hemorrhage. She refused to eat the mushrooms.

My ex-wife once told me to give her nine inches and make it hurt. So, I fucked her three times, then slapped her silly.

My ex-wife told me I was a lousy lover. I don't see how she can make a judgement like that in two minutes.

My ex-wife told me my organ was too small. I told her her cathredal was too big.

Anybody got some more?

< Message edited by HarryVanWinkle -- 8/5/2006 9:39:01 PM >

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RE: Ex-wife tales - 8/5/2006 9:50:08 PM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

I'm an ex-wife and I rock!

I have a wedding dress for sale. It's beautiful, like new, and worn just once... by mistake.

Harry, my opinion is that that marriages work out much better when the male does the dishes.
<wicked smile>

(in reply to HarryVanWinkle)

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RE: Ex-wife tales - 8/5/2006 10:18:33 PM

enigmabrat

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Joined: 8/1/2004
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LOL use paper plates its easier

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Leather strap $85.00 on Master card
Wooden paddle $50.00 on Master card
ratten cane $48.00 on Master card

a Master that can use them all Priceless

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RE: Ex-wife tales - 8/5/2006 11:11:14 PM

MistressLorelei

Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: enigmabrat

LOL use paper plates its easier

If the male wishes to wash paper plates instead, I am fine with that as well.

(in reply to enigmabrat)

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RE: Ex-wife tales - 8/6/2006 4:10:46 AM

VandalHeart

Posts: 1333
Joined: 9/12/2004
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I've only ever been in one fight, and after I beat her ass to a bloody pulp, I said, "I told you when we got married never to run over my foot in that damned wheelchair!"

(I'm going to hell for that one)

< Message edited by VandalHeart -- 8/6/2006 4:11:07 AM >

_____________________________

I ask for so little. Just let me rule you, and you can have everything that you want. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave.
--King Jarenth of the Goblins, Labyrinth

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RE: Ex-wife tales - 8/6/2006 9:21:56 AM

cuddleheart50

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
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I want an ex husband thread.

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Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

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