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cynthiamarie -> RE: Doms and whores. (8/9/2006 3:44:56 PM)
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zenofeller, I'd say that because of the ratio of men to women, many women find a partner early and don't need to advertise, or have put their profiles on hold to prevent getting unwanted spamming type mail, leaving a seeming higher ratio of Dommes who want tribute.
Some things to point out, just for the sake of debate:
Women test men, and just because we're into BDSM doesn't mean that courting rituals don't apply...the man still buys the flowers or candy, and pays for dinner and the motel, if applicable.
Submissive women are often in lesser paying, service oriented jobs, and/or have many obligations to family and friends that drains their resources...many have custody of young children (financially much more draining than to the father who, from the women I know, pay anywhere from nothing to only $100 per month). Why should these women pay for dates? I don't understand why vanilla women ever pay for dates...they often become mere fuckbuddies to men who are not really interested in them romantically, and then the men use this saved money to pay for dates with women they consider hotties. Most of the male subs I chat with have very good jobs and can afford to take a woman out on a date, and even pay for a hotel/motel.
I can understand why some women demand tribute, when topping subs that aren't theirs. Men can be very demanding and a lot of hard work, and...many who want to bottom and explore BDSM play are very much "Do me!" subs. When someone demands under the guise of pleading to allow them to serve me online, order them to beat themselves, etc. as if they actually could be serving me...I'm to follow the script they wrote and yet they are "serving" me somehow, talk about self-delusional...anyway, the random thought that goes through my mind is that they need to be paying someone if they want a performing monkey.
Buying the toys to use on them has costed me hundreds of dollars. Same for clothing, and often not ones for me either. I have NOT taken tribute, but I can see why others do...I pretty much wore my deerhide suede flogger out on one bottom alone.
You get what you pay for; either the payment is in emotions or else the payment is in another form. Instead of asking why so many Dommes want tribute, ask yourself why so many males choose to be customers instead of boyfriends.
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i mean, there's more women into cuddling than men, you don't see men selling cuddling services do you ?
Yeah they do...many women pay with giving sex and get hugs instead of love and commitment.
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when did you last hear about a male dominant requiring "tributes" ?
Many do, but it's not called tributes...it's called "women's work", or supporting the Dom while he's down on his luck by sending him money or handing over all of your goods to him (including the title to the house and to the car). I know this is not for everybody, but then...neither are Dommes who expect tribute. They're a part of the lifestyle, not the only choice.
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there's a distinct yet similar category, of women that don't outright beg for money, but still are looking for something very speciffic. a nice house. a better matress than they can afford. real wine. real kashmir. a better car. lifestyle as in plush couch not necessarily as in sweat and blood. all the bdsm contraption then become something tollerated, for the caviar and mumm, it isn't as bad as it seems, it doesn't last that long, heck, why not sort of thing.
Our actors get paid for their work...if she tolerates this lifestyle in exchange for these things, that's the working arrangement between two people and none of my business. Nothing that could make me upset, or feel that anything is not fair. This is the business of the parties involved, and doesn't affect me...except when males approach me expecting to treat me like a prostitute...but I figure these types were out there before they even met Dommes who demanded tribute, and I send them on their way to find one who appreciates what they have to offer.
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most american's grand-grandmother was either an old world whore forcibly shipped to the new world, a woman someone bought for tobacco leaves, a black woman someone raped etc etc. all because there weren't that many women there, had to get the place populated somehow.
Some, not most. *Imagines pilgrim women being ex-prostitutes and laughs.* Many of us had our relatives come here after those times. We had an influx of Irish immigrants because of the potato famine, and many Chinese to build the railroad, and negroes who were imported for slavery were not prostitutes. Many became indentured servants and were brought to America because they were in jail over debt, and others became indentured servants just to pay for their voyage. Others were indiscriminately rounded up from the poor parts of town just so the country could get rid of some of it's surplus population.
My first relative here from my father's proud line was sent to America from prison, to avoid a death sentence from stealing a man's coat and cane. Yes, it's in a book at the library, called Early Criminals in America or something. He was an indentured servant for 7 years as punishment.
Ah, my proud heritage...*grins*
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