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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 2:18:25 PM   
RosaB


Posts: 852
Joined: 1/10/2005
Status: offline 		Thanks Dauric.  Maybe I'll rent the dvd just to see that ole meany and yes the visuals were beautiful.

Rosa

< Message edited by RosaB -- 8/17/2006 2:20:16 PM >

(in reply to Dauric)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 3:39:36 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		Part of it spoke to me in a D/s way, now that I think more about it.  He made her change her dress, change her hair, before they went out to the cocktail party.  I wasn't attracted to the way he beat the crap out of her though.

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 3:44:19 PM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		I'm gonna have to watch it again and see what i missed the first time. I definately had no real clues about bdsm the first time i saw it. Mind you i was watching the nightmare on elm street films the other day and there is a part in it where the gym teacher is tied up and whipped pretty badly with a towel - never saw the bdsm in that first time round either.

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 3:50:03 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

I guess when I was watching it.. I toyed with this idea:  Is it just TPE to the extreeme?  We all have read or known someone where they say whatever Master/Mistress wants is my will.. what if THIS was an example of that.

Or a submissive that refused to use her safeword?

I know it's about spousal abuse..but the things he has her do like keeping the hand towel borders  just exactly straight.. and alphabetizing the pantry cans.  The "taking" of her when he wants..  these and having her wear what he wants her to.  These are the parallels I see. 

For one it is abouse.. for the lifestyle it's play... or extreeme devotion.  The line is very fine I think.

I have known some submisives in so deep..they can't see the difference anymore.


He stifled her, kept her from her mother, kept her from friends and basically isolated her.  She feared him. She could not speak her mind.  There was no warning for his wrath, it just came whenever it came and for no explained reason.  I can not fathom that being part of a healthy D/s dynamic, or being appealing in any way.

As for the cans...well that's just OCD.  My cans are the same way, as are my towels.  But then I'm freaky like that.  :)


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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 3:59:42 PM   
MissTlTTYMilk


Posts: 142
Joined: 6/17/2006
Status: offline 		i think the difference between BDSM and what happened in the film is that Julia's character did not want to be his captive--she was a <gasp>noncompatible wannabe.......But i do see the BDSM undertones that can be analyzed in the film as well as the examples mentioned above......didnt He attempt to try breath play with the mother?  i dont mean to make fun of an abusive situation-- i can only hope the film was fictional.  It interesting to analyze films for BDSM and related undertones.....thank you OP for pointing this film out.

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:02:59 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		No, I saw her as being nonconsensually abused and controlled.

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(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:11:14 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline 		Next time you see it.. just forget it's about spousal abuse.. and see where it takes you.

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:19:54 PM   
Emperor1956


Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline 		I saw it when it first came out, and I remember thinking "This guy's an asshole...and they want us to see WHY he's an asshole so they load him up with a lame case of OCD (the cans, the towels)."  I assume that was a writers' trick to invoke some "villian empathy".  I remember thinking about whether there was a B/D/S/M subtext and concluding it was a pretty bad movie, and had no B/D/S/M qualities.

Why are you all bagging on Julia Roberts?  She was a great piece of eye candy on Andy Garcia's arm in those abysmal "Ocean 11-12-13-45-88-etc." movies.

E

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"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to LotusSong)
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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:21:26 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

Why are you all bagging on Julia Roberts?


too much teeth, mouth.


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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:43:14 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline 		That was somebody else here.. I didn't say anything about Julia :)

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:47:53 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

Why are you all bagging on Julia Roberts?  She was a great piece of eye candy on Andy Garcia's arm in those abysmal "Ocean 11-12-13-45-88-etc." movies.

Mmmm, Andy Garcia....
(I have told Master that Andy is my boyfriend on the side, except he (Andy) doesn't know it yet).

(in reply to Emperor1956)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/17/2006 4:53:20 PM   
popeye1250


Posts: 18104
Joined: 1/27/2006
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline 		Emporer, I just don't think that Julia Roberts is that attractive looking.
Not a very good actor either.
I'm more of a Jamie Lee Curtis type myself.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 9:14:50 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie


He stifled her, kept her from her mother, kept her from friends and basically isolated her.  She feared him. She could not speak her mind.  There was no warning for his wrath, it just came whenever it came and for no explained reason.  I can not fathom that being part of a healthy D/s dynamic, or being appealing in any way.

As for the cans...well that's just OCD.  My cans are the same way, as are my towels.  But then I'm freaky like that.  :)




How many submissives are in the situation of TPE wher the Master/Mistress does just that? 

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Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
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Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 9:28:45 AM   
Dauric


Posts: 254
Joined: 7/13/2006
Status: offline 		A situation where that happens isn't WIITWD, it's abuse. TPE isn't where power is taken, it's where power is given.

$0.02,

Dauric.

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 10:30:05 AM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dauric

A situation where that happens isn't WIITWD, it's abuse. TPE isn't where power is taken, it's where power is given.

$0.02,

Dauric.


And of course no submissive ever gives her "heart. mind. body and soul" over to master.. and most definintly does he never say.."I will USE youas I wish"

..people are human.....and how do we gauge absolute power?

What I am sayin here is YES.. it's ABOUT Spousal ABUSE.

What I AM saying ALSO.. is that it COULD also be a romantisized concept of TPE where master was given  her power and he went ballistics with it.

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Life Lesson #1

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 4:25:43 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie


He stifled her, kept her from her mother, kept her from friends and basically isolated her.  She feared him. She could not speak her mind.  There was no warning for his wrath, it just came whenever it came and for no explained reason.  I can not fathom that being part of a healthy D/s dynamic, or being appealing in any way.

As for the cans...well that's just OCD.  My cans are the same way, as are my towels.  But then I'm freaky like that.  :)




How many submissives are in the situation of TPE wher the Master/Mistress does just that? 

No clue.  We can start a poll perhaps.  How many threads on this very site do you see, where the massive concensus is that a slave or submissive should NOT be ruled in fear, should NOT be isolated, and should NOT be hit in anger, or punished without explanation?

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 6:43:12 PM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

Or a submissive that refused to use her safeword?

I never thought of that. You could be right.


I think that "Send the Police....I've just shot an intruder" was a pretty definite safeword.

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RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 6:54:42 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I think that "Send the Police....I've just shot an intruder" was a pretty definite safeword.


Excellent, excellent, excellent! 

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Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 6:59:29 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

I think that "Send the Police....I've just shot an intruder" was a pretty definite safeword.


One of my favorites. :) And I wonder why Doms don't like to play with me.. huh (JK!)

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


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Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Sleeping with the Enemy - 8/18/2006 7:00:57 PM   
SirKenin


Posts: 2994
Joined: 10/31/2004
From: Barrie, ON Canada
Status: offline 		No, no D/s element involved.  I hated that movie.  I can not stomach the abuse of women, whether it be on a big screen, in the news or in person.  I find no entertainment value there and I think the producer should be ashamed of themselves for even coming up with the movie to begin with.

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