dr's visits (Full Version)

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subsa -> dr's visits (8/23/2006 3:26:32 PM)

the thread about long lasting marks brought a question to my mind.  how do you explain them to a doctor?  i did a search on this but didn't find much.  only one thread that wasn't about this topic but had a few posts pertaining to it.  (Lucky Albatross: i need search lessons please... lol) of course if you know you're going to have an appointment you can ask for a time of abstinance from those telltale markings but since some last soooo long i wouldn't want to stop for that long.  and what if its not a planned appointment?  i think there would be no raised eyebrows about the shaved appearance and even piercings are becoming very common but what about the marks?  any suggestions other than finding a doctor that is lifestyle aware?  (i'm trying that right now with not much luck). 



diamonddreamlove -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 3:39:43 PM)

How about wait til they ask and then tell them.  If the dr backs away from you looking at you like you have or are something dirty get a new dr.   But actually I do understand went to the dr today and he didn't say a word.  Was at a different dr last week and he didn't say a word some marks can be hidden or just appear like normal hard work and clutsyness have happened. 



sweetnurseBBW -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 3:40:43 PM)

As a nurse when I worked ER if we saw such marks by law in my state we have to ask if they are concensual. If so, no problem. The laws being what they are, it is a part of admission assessment to ask if anyone is hurting them at home. I had a young woman in a car accident , she was brought to the Ed strapped to the backboard. WE starting cutting her clothes off and i saw the look of horrow in her face. She pointed to her breasts, I asked her with no one else in the room if these were done by consent or no. She said yes. Any trained medical professsional should investigate the situation before jumping to conclusions. Plus more doctors and nurses are in this lifestyle than you know. If not and you explain where they came from they will just probably think you are weird as my NP does. As long as you tell them that you wanted it they cant do anything. HIPPA laws prevent them from sharing this info without your consent unless you are in immediate danger. So dont worry about. [:D]



subsa -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 3:52:09 PM)

thanks for the info sweetnurseBBW.  t thought the law was that they had to be reported regardless.  once, a friend who cut Master's hair, sliced him with the razor.  even though we kept telling them it was an accident they kept wanting to call the police and file a report.  i had been crying (it was a bad, deep cut) and they kept asking him if i did it. 



juliaoceania -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 5:05:25 PM)

Next time I go for a physical I am going to have them document that I enjoy BDSM sex so that if I ever have marks they know where they came from.



Slipstreme -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 5:41:24 PM)

I tell them upfront what I am into. So they aren't surprised. If they don't like it, fine, I won't pay my money to their practice.



SweetSarijane -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 5:43:14 PM)

The marks that got me to start that thread are still visible today and yesterday I went to see my doctor. She didn't see them as what I was there for didn't necessitate that area of my body being looked at, but she's a pretty cool doc and if it so happens that I go see her close to when I've played and she sees marks, I will tell her they are consensual. I won't offer more than is needed in the way of explanation as it's my business who I tell what to, but I doubt she'd freak over it.



juliaoceania -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 5:50:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

As a nurse when I worked ER if we saw such marks by law in my state we have to ask if they are concensual. If so, no problem. The laws being what they are, it is a part of admission assessment to ask if anyone is hurting them at home. I had a young woman in a car accident , she was brought to the Ed strapped to the backboard. WE starting cutting her clothes off and i saw the look of horrow in her face. She pointed to her breasts, I asked her with no one else in the room if these were done by consent or no. She said yes. Any trained medical professsional should investigate the situation before jumping to conclusions. Plus more doctors and nurses are in this lifestyle than you know. If not and you explain where they came from they will just probably think you are weird as my NP does. As long as you tell them that you wanted it they cant do anything. HIPPA laws prevent them from sharing this info without your consent unless you are in immediate danger. So dont worry about. [:D]


Perhaps in your state they are not mandated to report, but I am almost positive in my state they are. My niece went to the doctor and had bruises around her neck from her husband choking her. She was asked how it was done, and she flat out refused to say, so they filed a police report. They also charged him with spousal abuse and if he had not pled out he would have went on trial. In this state they do not need the testimony of the victim to charge. They have started trying these cases without the consent of the woman abused because women do not want to testify because either they are afraid or they have "made up" with the abuser (as my niece had). We do have some of the harshest laws about domestic violence though

On edit, it is best that everyone check their own state laws, and tell your healthcare provider about your "interests" so if it ever became an issue, well you are on record stating you have an interest in BDSM, which could stop a lot of unnecessary grief



redvanilla -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 5:58:00 PM)

This thread is very interesting, and something that I have been talking with my Dom about recently.  I myself am very anxious about the questions. 

I suppose however that anyone interested in knowing what the reporting laws are in your state, you can likely call the domestic violence hotline in your area (anonymously if you like) and ask them.  I know in my area the only mandated reports are those injuries made with a weapon, most docs only report those made with a knife or gun.



sweetnurseBBW -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 6:09:16 PM)

Like I said a healthcare professional (good one) will investigate before reporting . Peopel lives can be ruined if things arent checked out before police are involved. Sometimes its pretty obvious that someone meant to try and kill someone or hurt fatally. Once you have seen a woman with series of scars and bruises, you dont forget what that looks like.



juliaoceania -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 6:13:18 PM)

Some people are into choking until someone passes out, so it could happen. Her situation was abuse, but it just as easily could have been WIITWD. Some people are into cutting and knife play also.

It just seems a no-brainer to me that I would inform my GP of this next opportunity considering my state's laws, not that I am into anything that serious, but I do like face slapping, and something could happen as a result of that. I would hate my Dom to be arrested if it could be prevented.



ghosttraks -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 6:23:58 PM)

I had to go to the emergency room for a fall and a bad cut to get stitches.

because it looked like it could have been a punch, a special nurse came around to ask questions.

It was a good thing it was not the week before. Then I had bruises along my throat, rope marks, a welt.

It is the law in some places they report things, to the authorities, even if you say it is BDSM.

Scary!



ghosttraks -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 6:28:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

Some people are into choking until someone passes out, so it could happen. Her situation was abuse, but it just as easily could have been WIITWD. Some people are into cutting and knife play also.

It just seems a no-brainer to me that I would inform my GP of this next opportunity considering my state's laws, not that I am into anything that serious, but I do like face slapping, and something could happen as a result of that. I would hate my Dom to be arrested if it could be prevented.


YEP! That would surely suck.

Plus, you would not be able to drop police charges. The police press the charges. Then the judge decides.

He could go to jail. If no bail $. No release until hearing. If weapon used, like knife, whip it could be aggravated assault; a serious crime.

Dominats have to be safe and careful too!



FelinePersuasion -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 6:28:38 PM)

I haven't gone in with marks, but my dr knows I am into bdsm and so there will be no embarrasment or the feeling of needing to hide  from my dr.



Slipstreme -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:10:22 PM)

quote:

YEP! That would surely suck.

Plus, you would not be able to drop police charges. The police press the charges. Then the judge decides.

He could go to jail. If no bail $. No release until hearing. If weapon used, like knife, whip it could be aggravated assault; a serious crime.

Dominats have to be safe and careful too


Ha! I would love to see them try. In my case, they would have to track down and press charges against 7 different people.



smilezz -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:13:20 PM)

For me.....i walked into see each of my Doctors, sat down with them and told them that i was into S&M, i would most likely at times have some bruising...cuts...etc.  I looked them dead in the eye and said:  Can you deal with this?  if not, i would find someone that could.  Neither of them batted an eye.  They asked alot of questions, i answered.
Since i had moved to Arizona, i needed to find Doctors, I have a great relationship with my Gyno. she knows everything.  I am now looking for a Family type Doctor that i will most certainly share the same information with.

In the long run, it's much better to be up front with them.  The WILL tell you if they can not deal with it.  If not, move on down to the next Doctor until you find one you are comfortable with.

~smilezz~



ghosttraks -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:28:38 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Slipstreme

Ha! I would love to see them try. In my case, they would have to track down and press charges against 7 different people.


Thats funny! I can see the keystone cops or F Troop running around like fools! hahahahaha [:D]

family doctor is one things. Emergency room is another. All should be well with such brave, smart people. Just cause... sh8 happens.



juliaoceania -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:30:06 PM)

It seems a lot better for them to have this information about you than to keep them in the dark about it, it just could be very important for them to know down the road



HarryVanWinkle -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:49:13 PM)

(fast reply)

I went for a physical once, the day after a heavy flogging.  My entire back was bruised.  The doctors didn't say a thing.  Perhaps it was due to the shit eating grin I had on my face.

If, in the future, a doctor should ask me about any marks I might have (and I LIKE marks,) I will tell him flat out that I am a sadomasochist and that getting such marks is my idea of having fun.  What are they going to do about it, tell my mommy?

If a medical person insisted on reporting the "abuse,"  I would refuse to name the "abuser."  If I was married and they thought it was my spouse, I would state that I was cheating and the "abuser" wasn't my spouse.

In the event of police interogation, I would state no more than that the marks were the result of consensual play and refuse to say anything more.



Slipstreme -> RE: dr's visits (8/23/2006 7:55:33 PM)

The sad thing is, at my gyno's practice, it is customary for them to report things, regardless. At least, I haven't yet been bugged by the social worker they were supposed to send to my house. And she isn't too happy with my chosen lifestyle, but oh well. That is her problem, not mine.



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