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debutante -> RE: Regarding Asexuality (9/1/2006 4:16:22 PM)
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Thanks for the *mostly* helpful replies haha.
In regards to some comments, we actually watched some porn together last night, and it was all hetero (ok... some lesbian haha). He was hard as a rock the whole time. Plus, like I said, he is totally willing to please me by fingering, going down on me and so on. I asked him about masturbation, and he says he does it, but very rarely. I asked about what he thinks about when he is doing it, and his responce was 'women in bondage'. Generally, I don't worry about the gay factor. Yes, of course I thought of it, but breaking it all down I just don't think that's the reason.
I do think the biggest thing is nerves. We discussed it a few nights ago, and he explained that he does see sex as a VERY big deal (I generally don't feel the same), and 1) I do think he has built sex up as the end all be all 2) that kind of pressure makes him extreemly nervous, and therefor he can't perform.
But he is completely willing to try to work it out with me. He told me the other night when we were talking about it that he does want to have sex, but he does feel a lot of nerves. He told me that if our relationship does become serious he will do his best to give me what I want, as long as I was willing to wait, which I am. I understand it might not happen, but if it does get serious, I hope it does.
Right now I'm not in a panic, but he did tell me that asexuality is something that many people in the bdsm community identify themselves as, and I was hoping to get some opinions, and I did. Thanks :)
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