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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 8/30/2006 8:34:55 AM

Ladyofthemanor

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quote:

ORIGINAL: greysunnydays

What I'm getting from a lot of people is they are taking what I am sayng to another level. I'm talking strictly about play, not if you can eat or not. Lol.

From my eyes, if your Dom/Master/Mistress asks you to beg, than have at it. I just hesitate on the asking part because the way I see it, it should always be up to the Dom in the group. I know "Well, it's just asking. I'm not demanding it" has come up.

Now if it's something he's mentioned previously "I'm going to flog you later" and forgets....I don't mind reminding him. He has already stated he was going to. Lol.

All in all, it's interesting to see all of your guys different opinions. Or not so different. Many of you agree with each other. Lol.

EXACTLY!!!!! i completely understand where are you are coming from!!! and you don't know if it was forgotten, or intentionally forgotten, as a way of saying NO!

i am a 24/7 TPE slave, and this topic is a major issue for U/us. Master thinks his slave should ask/communicate slave needs/wants/desire to her Master.

As a slave i believe that as a slave i shouldn't have any needs, desires or wants, and by asking i am topping from the bottom. No, i am not a doormat slave that is just how i was trained as a slave. It is very hard for me to ask for what i want, but then to ask for it, and if it is forgotten or told not tonight, i feel defeated, and rejected. Also, i have in my head a 3 strike rule if i ask for something 3 times and if it is told no, or forgotten, then i will NOT ask again. Because what is the point, this is something that i am struggling to over come in our relationship. Also, i would say my Master and i have a great relationship and open communication, expect when it comes to this point/issue.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/1/2006 3:02:23 AM

youngslavegirl82

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Joined: 8/7/2006
From: Norway
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MasterO encourages her to express her thoughts and feelings, and allows her to tell Him about her wishes. It is of course totally up to Master if what she wishes will happen.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/1/2006 5:16:58 PM

ImpGrrl

Posts: 575
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Ladyofthemanor
i am a 24/7 TPE slave, and this topic is a major issue for U/us. Master thinks his slave should ask/communicate slave needs/wants/desire to her Master.

As a slave i believe that as a slave i shouldn't have any needs, desires or wants, and by asking i am topping from the bottom. No, i am not a doormat slave that is just how i was trained as a slave.

It sounds like you're setting yourself up for frustration, maybe even failure, by believing that you shouldn't have needs, desires, or wants.

And which is more important - "how you were trained as a slave", presumably by someone else in your past, and what your owner wants?

Holding to the former over the latter shows, to me, misplaced priorities as a slave.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/1/2006 5:55:06 PM

cielo

Posts: 11
Joined: 9/1/2006
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greetings all,

i would not only ask, i would beg and beg hard. It is always his decision in the end, and i will know when to stop begging.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/2/2006 7:43:04 AM

Celeste43

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From: NYS
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He finds it very enjoyable to know that I'm desperately horny and want his time and attention.

However I have difficulty coming right out and asking for it because of fear of rejection. I'm more likely to snuggle up against him and rub against him and so on.

If I'm in the mood for a spanking, I tend to wiggle my ass at him. A definite nonverbal message!

In either case, my expressing a desire is not rude, it's simply me telling him what I'm thinking about. He still has the option of grabbing me or telling me to sit down and read a book.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/2/2006 7:41:04 PM

eyesopened

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i should think a Master would be happy to hear "Master, i so need You" i might not understand D/s or M/s relationships enough to understand why He would not want to know how much you need Him. That's not topping from the bottom or even making a request but rather giving Him information on your needs.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/2/2006 9:57:46 PM

Sirandlittle1

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Joined: 12/22/2005
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Beware the use of the phrase a slave/sub SHOULD. Its so subjective to each relationship and rarely carries over to the next. As for a switch should, blimey, who'd of thought, if a switch 'should' wouldnt they be a sub? by your definition?
Personally, i am allowed to communicate my wants, needs etc. If he wishes, he'll indulge me. Nobody is truly telepathic, sometimes asking helps. Sometimes begging helps even more

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cutiepie74019

i personally would never ask for attention because as a slave/submissive/switch should be happy with the attention that he/she is recieveing for they're some/dome/switch , and i too would find it rude to ask a dom/dome that

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 12:14:09 AM

hispossession

Posts: 161
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Master has always said that I may beg him for anything. It doesn't mean that I'll get it but it's not disallowed. I think that one of the ways that asking/begging might be construed as bratty or inapporpriate or whatever is if you sulk when you don't get the answer that you want. Master, as intuitive as he is, is not a mind reader, a fact that he reminds me of constantly, and expects me to communicate my needs and wants to him. It's up to him to decide if he should indulge me or not.

I personally don't enjoy the "beating" part of our relationship. Master reserves that for punishment. He is incredibly good at teasing/tormenting me in many many other ways though... and I do love those!!

< Message edited by hispossession -- 9/3/2006 12:16:32 AM >

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 12:24:31 AM

marieToo

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Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
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quote:

ORIGINAL: greysunnydays

Would you ask the Domly One/Master/Mistress to be flogged or beat or to have sex with you...or anything along those lines? I'm curious as to the responces. In my eyes, I believe it should be up to the Dom/Master/Mistress rather or not play is going to partake. I find it a tad rude..(Now please don't be offended..these are just my thoughts.) if a sub/slave/switch (in bottom mode.) asks to be flogged or what not. Should that not be up to the Dom/Master/Mistress?

Hypothetically speaking, I would ask for the whipping, but only had to one time. Since I have only been with sadists, asking to get beat was never really something that I had to worry about. Ask for sexual pleasure? no way. I have served in two Ds relationships only. So my experience isnt that vast. One of the relationships was mostly sexual. The other involved no sex. It was a complete service type of relationship. In the first one, I never had to ask for sex since he liked using me that way exclusively. In the second one....it was different...way differnt....I didnt really even have sexual desires for him necessarily. If it had continued , Im sure he wouldve gotten around to using me that way, but I wouldnt have asked him for it, whether i desired it or not. I did however crave some basic human affection from him...for example to be in his arms after a whipping. I could see possibly asking for permission to touch him in a non sexual way if I needed to, but to ask for sex...no friggin way. I mean NO way.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 1:29:36 AM

slave4Darby3d

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I find that I really don't have to ask for much. My Master and I seem to be pretty on the same page. But, occasionally I do blurt out something here or there. He tends to ignore the outburst - which is perfectly fine. To me, the asking is sometimes enough...

But, IF I were going to ask for something... it would be a shoulder to ankle flogging with his blue flogger. warm stripes of undivided attention...mmm

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 1:04:25 PM

soldierfunuk

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I can ask Mistress for anything - of course it is up to her whether I get it or not. We are totally open in our wants, thoughts and emotions.

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 1:08:46 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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I don't think there's anything wrong with asking--as long as you understand, of course, that the domly one/master/mistress doesn't have to do something just because you asked for it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: greysunnydays

Would you ask the Domly One/Master/Mistress to be flogged or beat or to have sex with you...or anything along those lines? I'm curious as to the responces. In my eyes, I believe it should be up to the Dom/Master/Mistress rather or not play is going to partake. I find it a tad rude..(Now please don't be offended..these are just my thoughts.) if a sub/slave/switch (in bottom mode.) asks to be flogged or what not. Should that not be up to the Dom/Master/Mistress?

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RE: Would you ask Him/Her? - 9/3/2006 1:34:03 PM

ayasha

Posts: 149
Joined: 12/10/2005
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a slave can ask a Master to be flogged just because one feels the need for it whether it be for pleasure, to keep them on track as far as their submission/obedience goes, for discipline, whatever. It is not rude, nor disrespectful. A slave can not expect the Master to play with her whenever she desires - that is His choice, but to occasionally ask? smiles, that is a good thing.

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