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RE: Slave Journaling - 10/10/2007 9:06:58 PM

slaverosebeauty

Posts: 1941
Joined: 12/12/2004
From: Cali
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I have journaled long before MJ an I started our relationship; I did it for different reasons, to get things out of my head, to share my medical trials and to encourage other ladies to get to the doctor, so share part of my life and a glimpse into my journey; now, I started a new one that is a training journal. MJ thought it might be best, that way t was a bit more controlled, only people who are on my friend's list on lj for that particual journal can read it, as can He. I find it relaxing some times to just write, its also a form of therapy. I have had past partners that wanted me to journal daily, an I did; its not required of me now, so I don't. If it as, I'm sure people would get tired of hearing about my moron co-workers and how I want to leave.

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Post #: 41

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/10/2007 10:01:26 PM

slavegirljoy

Posts: 1207
Joined: 11/6/2006
From: North Carolina, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx
I have a question and it is not meant to offend anyone. So many Masters want their subs/slaves to journal: their thoughts, feelings, desires, fantasies, how they feel about their submission, why they want to be a slave, how they feel they can do better/more....all as a way to understand their sub better and to know better how to get the best out of their submission. The question: why don't Masters do the same thing?

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
Generally because of stereotypes and because journaling keeps fems busy

Actually, i don't journal to keep busy. i don't need to journal to keep busy or, for any other reason. i journal because i like to and because my Master enjoys reading it. i have plenty that keeps me busy, without the need for any additional tasks, just for the sake of filling my time. In fact, i have to make a point of scheduling time just to be able to write in my journal on any sort of regular basis.

i began keeping a journal because i wanted to and my Master gave me permission to. Journaling has never been a requirement for me. i do it for my benefit and He enjoys reading it.

quote:

and feeling connected so the dom doesn't actually have to exert any actual energy on their part to maintain a chunk of the relationship.

Although, i suppose there are some who are like this, my Master isn't one of them. He exerts a tremendous amount of actual energy on, not only maintaining Oour relationship, but, also on earning a living and providing for His household and giving His slave the physical discipline and pleasure-pain that i crave and donating platelets to the Red Cross and taking His family on fun outings and helping His friends and family and fixing things around the house and, so on and, so on.

quote:

Knowledge is power, a lot of relationships try to build on the dom knowing all and the sub knowing none or as little as necessary.

i've never known a relationship such as this, except in the case where the man is married and is making an effort to keep it a secret, although they probably do exist. As for my relationship, my Master wants me to be knowledgeable. He encourages my studies and keeping myself informed about a variety of subjects and enjoys having discussions with me on a wide variety of topics. i don't equate knowledge with power. There have been many very knowledgeable people, throughout time that have not had much power. Power is power, plain and simple.

quote:

Lots of subs get off on believing their dom can read them just like an open book (until the dom starts reading things they don't like, or not DOING what they want).

Maybe so but, not me. i happen to get off on the fact that my Master has complete control and power over me. He is good at reading my body language and can pick-up on my different moods but, He can't read me like an open book. That's why He tells me to talk to Him. He doesn't read my mind. He has me sit down and tell Him what's going on. He encourages me to write in my journal and to be honest and there have been some entries i have made that caused Him to feel bad and that resulted in His having me speak to Him about what i wrote and His asking questions about it and Wwe ended up having some very deep and meaningful conversations, as a result.

quote:

Slaves are supposed to anticipate what their masters want, but not actually ever "understand the mystery."

What mystery? i am here to serve my Master's needs and i know what He likes and i have things ready for Him when He wants them, such as, His morning coffee and newspaper ready when He gets up and His bed turned-down when He gets home from work. i ask Him if there's anything He wants, the rest of the day. He doesn't expect me to read His mind and know that He wants something, before He desires it. He let's me know when He wants something and then i get it or do it.

quote:

This is all the ideal fantasy stereotype perspective at least.

i'm not sure who's ideal fantasy you are describing here. It sure doesn't fit my ideal fantasy or my Master's. We are happily living Oour fantastic reality, without any of what you have described here. Perhaps Wwe are just the exception to the rule.

As to the question about why Masters don't keep journals, if you go to My-journal.com, you will find that there are quite a few journals that are written by Dominant men, just as there are many that are written by submissive men and many others that are written by vanilla men. Oh yeah, and there are some that are written by women, too. And, those are just the ones that are made public. Journalers have the option of making their journals private so, don't know how many of those there are.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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Post #: 42

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 2:47:11 PM

littlebitxxx

Posts: 732
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx
I have a question and it is not meant to offend anyone. So many Masters want their subs/slaves to journal: their thoughts, feelings, desires, fantasies, how they feel about their submission, why they want to be a slave, how they feel they can do better/more....all as a way to understand their sub better and to know better how to get the best out of their submission. The question: why don't Masters do the same thing?

Generally because of stereotypes and because journaling keeps fems busy and feeling connected so the dom doesn't actually have to exert any actual energy on their part to maintain a chunk of the relationship.

Knowledge is power, a lot of relationships try to build on the dom knowing all and the sub knowing none or as little as necessary. Lots of subs get off on believing their dom can read them just like an open book (until the dom starts reading things they don't like, or not DOING what they want).

Slaves are supposed to anticipate what their masters want, but not actually ever "understand the mystery."

This is all the ideal fantasy stereotype perspective at least.

Thank you, LA, that's pretty much what I thought. I'm not saying all relationships are like this but yeah, stereotypical fantasy M/s perspectives...yup yup.

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It is the meaningless little acts that become meaningful in the doing.

The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

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Post #: 43

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 4:07:41 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

I have a question and it is not meant to offend anyone. So many Masters want their subs/slaves to journal: their thoughts, feelings, desires, fantasies, how they feel about their submission, why they want to be a slave, how they feel they can do better/more....all as a way to understand their sub better and to know better how to get the best out of their submission. The question: why don't Masters do the same thing?

You are assuming that Masters (Universally) don't do it. I would suspect that there is some that do.

I don't require my girls to write in a journal.. but they do have journals and write in it when the Mood strikes them. It was particularly useful for Alandra since she is not one to be much for talking. She has often shared thoughts in writing. It has been a push to get her to Verbalize her thoughts instead of resorting to me reading her thoughts. At the same time... I am well.. Intense in conversations. Both girls actually find it easier at times to present their thoughts to me in writing before they actually speak to me. In some ways.. the use of journaling was due in part to weakness of not listening deep enough. As I improved on the weakness, the need of journaling has actually decreased. In the end... there was alot of reasons that journaling was used.

Now.. for myself.. I do journal when the mood strikes me. The journalling is not to communicate to my girls but to communicate to myself (remember.. I don't listen so well?!) What I actually journal about is already Common Knowledge with the girls. I might not of been so good at listening to them at times... but.. I am extremely good at sharing my thoughts and feelings with them. I very much an open book... They have questions.. they are answered...

Journaling is a Tool to communicate to others and often just to ourselves. I don't see it as some big romantic lifestyle thrill. What matters.. is journaling EFFECTIVE to the goals one is trying to achieve? In the past... journaling has been rather effective... but now it not as an effective use of energy because skill in other tools have improved that require less energy with the same effectiveness. It's still a tool... but it just is not used as often as it once was.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Post #: 44

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 5:53:16 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Mine is on livejournal. I write very little that is private, simply because I write little about the sex I have or the play I have. I write about my FEELINGS about these things, however. I also simply write about life, my personal growth and my spirituality.

http://masterfiremaam.livejournal.com/

Master Fire

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Post #: 45

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 5:57:26 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

I have a question and it is not meant to offend anyone. So many Masters want their subs/slaves to journal: their thoughts, feelings, desires, fantasies, how they feel about their submission, why they want to be a slave, how they feel they can do better/more....all as a way to understand their sub better and to know better how to get the best out of their submission. The question: why don't Masters do the same thing?

We do.

http://masterfiremaam.livejournal.com/

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

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Post #: 46

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 6:07:46 PM

beltainefaerie

Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
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I keep a journal on my own, but it is a livejournal and Master enjoys reading accounts of our scenes and my processing. He does not keep a journal regularly, but occasionally writes about our scenes as well. I do not expect him to read my journals all the time, but I will usually let him know when I posted something scene or relationship related, should he wish to read it. We also spend a lot of time discussing things in real life, since he values my mind as well as my body.

(in reply to littlesubjess)

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RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 7:22:54 PM

AFlyInYourWeb

Posts: 284
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DiurnalVampire

I have one question. Are there any male slaves that keep journals?

In some past relationships, yes; in others, no.

It really is up to the individual Domme's tastes whether I journal or not, whether she reads them or not, and if she cares to comment or not.

Properly used, I see it as a mechanism for mental control and information-gathering by the Mistress. I agree it should not be used in place of other communication, but rather as a supplement.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

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Post #: 48

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 8:33:21 PM

knotslandingdom

Posts: 23
Joined: 9/28/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlebitxxx
I have a question and it is not meant to offend anyone. So many Masters want their subs/slaves to journal: their thoughts, feelings, desires, fantasies, how they feel about their submission, why they want to be a slave, how they feel they can do better/more....all as a way to understand their sub better and to know better how to get the best out of their submission. The question: why don't Masters do the same thing?

Generally because of stereotypes and because journaling keeps fems busy and feeling connected so the dom doesn't actually have to exert any actual energy on their part to maintain a chunk of the relationship.

Knowledge is power, a lot of relationships try to build on the dom knowing all and the sub knowing none or as little as necessary. Lots of subs get off on believing their dom can read them just like an open book (until the dom starts reading things they don't like, or not DOING what they want).

Slaves are supposed to anticipate what their masters want, but not actually ever "understand the mystery."

This is all the ideal fantasy stereotype perspective at least.

Thank you, LA, that's pretty much what I thought. I'm not saying all relationships are like this but yeah, stereotypical fantasy M/s perspectives...yup yup.

So, in other words, your question was unnecessary, since you already had your answer. Unless, the reason for asking was only to seek validation from someone who would agree with your preconceived thoughts on this. In that case, it seems that you got what you wanted.

Just in case you might be interested in getting actual answers to your question, yes, some of us do make a point of keeping a journal. Mine happens to be written the old fashioned way, in longhand on yellow legal pads. I don't post it on a website for others to read. It's strictly for myself. I have also suggested to the women, I have been closely involved with over the years, that they might want to consider keeping a journal for their own use but, I would never require it. I believe that journal writing is a personal matter and shouldn't be forced on anyone.

Keeping a diary or journal is not unusual for men and much of recorded history has been taken from the diaries and journals of historic men and women, many of whom have been dominant.

Bill

(in reply to littlebitxxx)

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Post #: 49

RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 9:08:16 PM

sextoygirlNY

Posts: 194
Joined: 7/25/2007
From: Long Island, NY
Status: offline

greetings kajira,

journaling is a great tool not only for your Master to get a look into what is going on in your head, its also a great reflection tool for yourself and to monitor your growth. this one has been keeping a journal for over 15 years, she has had a website where she started journaling then recently went to livejournal. She also had hard copy regular black and white notebooks. The problem with that became she wanted to write so much more and the time it took to hand write it kept her from other duties....

Some things if she may suggest to keep in mind...
1)Although a journal is a great way to "vent" your anger and frustration out, try to keep it positive. Show all sides to how you are feel, not just the "bad stuff"
Same holds true for the "Good stuff" if there is a problem, concern question that you generally have, put it in and explain your feelings about it.
2)do not use a journal as a means to tell your Master something that you can't tell to his face. Or use it as an introduction into a conversation. In other words, there are times i will write something in my journal, Master will read, respond and discuss it. He also knows that with her temper, that he listens to her as to how she speaks after getting it out, not necessarily what is written on the paper.
3)journals can be private or public. All of this ones journals is public (please feel free to ask for addie) but sometimes you may want to keep it private for you and your Masters eyes only.

There were many times when a girl would read back on her journals, not believing that she ever had a mindset as such, or that she experienced that, or that was going through her mind at the time. Her entries were always long winded, and gave a lot of detail, this way even after 15 years, she can think back and remember that incident that was captured in words at the time she wrote it.

Journaling is also a great way for your Master to delved deep in your mind and mindset, finding out what it is that makes you tick, and enhance your training.
Good luck with the journaling, be yourself, be true, and write from your heart. The object is to write for you, not to write in reflection of what you "Think" your Master wants to hear...

Take care,
melanie

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RE: Slave Journaling - 10/11/2007 9:46:19 PM

sheepishone

Posts: 2
Joined: 2/13/2006
From: Texas but momentarily reside in Kansas
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Well, I've never been required to journal but I do because it helps me work things out in my mind. There have been times that I've been told to go write to try to get my head together but it's just for that specific time period. My Owner has access to my journals/blogs. If she chooses to read them, then it's for her to get insight into my thoughts and feelings and ideas. I'm never criticized or in trouble for what I write. The reason I chose to journal and give my Owner the password to my journal is because she owns all of me, including my thoughts. That's the privilege of Ownership.
The reverse of that is not true. Her thoughts are not mine. If she chooses to write and then share it with me, then I'm very grateful especially because I believe she writes very well. That is a privilege! But a Dominant doesn't have to do something just because they require us to do it. I cannot even request that she takes care of herself, although that is my first and most important rule. I do ask her to sometimes but not request it. There's a huge difference in attitude about that.
Merrie
Property of Primani Nova and Draco Infernus
House Infernus

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Post #: 51