kazinja
Posts: 24
Joined: 8/15/2006
Status: offline
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Allyn did not provide the sub's three line message, nor his exact reply, so we should be careful stating an opinion and even more, passing judgement. His answer seems a little bit highbrow, his profile is not free of arrogance, but nevertheless I tend to side with him. I have received my share of unbelievable responses from submissives. They have little to do with dyslexia or other learning disabilities. If someone is dyslectic and just says so, this will nearly always be met with a lot of goodwill. From my line of work, I know quite a few dyslectics and most of them are nice, intelligent, talented, sociable people with no other communicational handicap than their spelling. I would be offended if I were a dyslectic, and this excuse were used for the kind of ill-mannered approach that many of us experience more often than we care to.
There are a few telltale signs that betray the lack of investment that a lot of submissives (and probably Dom(mes) too) are ready to make, when they are trying to meet people on the net. Poor spelling –not always caused by dyslexia or LD- is but one; others are poor phrasing, lack of use of capitals and interpunction, no proper beginning or ending (I mean polite rather than correct), no answers to questions, showing no real interest in the other party, giving a three word answer to a one-page polite answer to their initial contact!). Or closing a chat when you are in mid-sentence. I could go on… To rephrase a saying: “don’t attribute to dyslexia, that which can be adequately explained by bad manners”.
Yes, this is the web, but why would you accept things here that would be unheard of in real life? Why is it not OK to point out unpleasant or at least ineffective ways of behaviour? If everyone shrugs his shoulders because ‘that’s the way it is on the web’, how are things ever going to change? Complaining will not solve traffic congestions, as LA stated, but pointing out less desirable ways of communicating might bring about an improvement in internet etiquette, if repeated often enough and given the right priority.
Impoliteness, laziness, rants, abusive language are by no means symptoms of dyslexia or other learning disabilities and I hope Allyn’s criticism did not include a direct reference to the sub's intelligence. This in itself would imply a lack of refinement.
All those poor underpriviledged subs and Doms that can’t help they cannot communicate right?? Ah, come off it! There’s an awful lot of plain bad manners and laziness going around on the net. It sounds silly to me to try to cover that up by suggesting it’s dyslexia or LD.
Most dyslectics that I know are able to start sentences with a capital and end them with a period. These are easy to use and essential for easy reading. Try reading twenty-line posts with elliptic phrasing and no use of capitals or interpunction whatsoever. There are spellingcheckers, there are friends willing to go over one’s writings (I have mine proofread most of the time, as I am not a native speaker, but alas, my sub’s out for the night). Better use a proofread and/or copy-pasted letter for a first approach, mayby even explaining your weak points, than one that’s guaranteed not to appeal to the adressee.
By the way, would you have a Dom(me) that wouldn’t have you for a sub if you were dyslectic??
Well then…
regards
Kazinja’s Ronald
< Message edited by kazinja -- 9/2/2006 5:41:22 PM >
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RE: Contacting Dominants - 
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...good point girl...Tempting
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