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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 11:04:20 AM

Homestead

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quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

Perhaps we could actually begin to speak with a more unified coherence, and through embracing responsibility, accountability and honor in our choices and actions, show to the rest of our fearful fellow man that what we do is not simply a realm of dysfunctional "adult fantasy games."

I LOVE this idea.. I really do.

But...unified coherence? We can't even agree on what we all call ourselves (and I am NOT starting a sub vs. slave discussion here). I think we have a ways to go before we get to a unified coherence... unless of course, you'd all like to agree with ....

me.

*laughing* (gawd, I am so submissive!)

juliet

I don't like to use bdsm catch phrases like master and slave. I prefer more specific ones, like owner and servant.

When I speak of limits, it is by servant progative "sub" and owner perogative,(owner's limits are adopted by servant)

It's much less confusing if one simply abandons the meaningless terminolgy, and adapts more specific ones.

Coherence comes through coherence of thought and action. A limiting of the meanings of basic foundational principles. The less wriggle room allowed for argument and rationalization, the easier it becomes to weed out distractive elements from the mix.

Simple is often better.

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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 11:08:24 AM

TxBadMan

Posts: 198
Joined: 4/7/2006
From: Moody, Texas
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I think everyone should, to the very best of their ability, try to honor agreements that they have made with others.

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Chris

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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 11:25:01 AM

mp072004

Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
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Funny, I tend to run all of my life--not just the kinky parts--on negotiated agreements, contracts, covenants, what have you. You and I agree to do this, and we do it. We don't agree to things that we won't do. There are penalties, also agreed-upon, that we are obliged to realize if we break our agreements. Thus, it's morally wrong to not keep your bargains, and, if morality isn't enough, the penalties make it not expedient to act dishonorably.

Agreements, morality, and honor aren't, incidentally, about making people happy; they're about right action, which leads to a state of contentment or satisfaction. Morality and avoidance of penalty isn't all that provides the state of contentment, though--in my practical experience, life works better when people do what they say they're going to do.

What do I think about honoring agreements? Uh, I think it's good and correct.

Monica

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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 11:39:05 AM

GddssBella

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Joined: 2/24/2004
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G'morning all:

Not reading the entire thread, just answering the topic. If the situation becomes dire, meaning imminent harm or damage is about to happen, then I don't believe that breaking an agreement is dishonorable. You must safeguard yourself first and foremost. Otherwise, yes I agree, breaking a well structured and pre-negotiated agreement is dishonorable. When you give your word, it should be your honor. It should be without reproach or alteration. It is your bond. It is what makes others trust you. Being an oath breaker is despicable.

Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others...

Bella

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Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!"

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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 12:29:24 PM

amayos

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

...unified coherence? We can't even agree on what we all call ourselves (and I am NOT starting a sub vs. slave discussion here). I think we have a ways to go before we get to a unified coherence...

Slightly taken out of context, per your omission of a very important "more" in the area you're referencing. Generally, I contend that the "issues" often brought to the table of argument often do have reliable answers. Some matters will be forever relative, but basic tenets of accountability, direct communication and honesty, if widely accepted by the chimera, will in the very least give it more peace within and more credibility without. It is wrong to construct a banner or spearhead to this end, but it would be nice to see such behavior adopted collectively and autonomously throughout the social pool.

I likewise understand this constitutes a fantasy when speaking about large groups of humans, too.

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RE: Honoring agreements. - 9/4/2006 1:14:30 PM

Mavis

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Joined: 2/8/2004
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quote:

What do you think about honoring agreements?

Well, this is kind of stating the obvious.. You didn't expect anyone to answer in the negative..."Oh, i think agreements are not really worth honoring..." Or was the point of the question to see how many ways W/we could state O/our agreement with You?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Homestead

I don't like to use bdsm catch phrases like master and slave. I prefer more specific ones, like owner and servant.

Owner and servant are ALSO catch-phrases, as was pointed out in the "On Service" thread posted by losttreasure.. not all see themselves as primarily servants.. nor do all Doms expect such, although as a catch-phrase to define what we do it works ok.

Anyway, i think W/we all say yes to honoring agreements, the prob is when there is ambiguity in what has been a greed to, and in the case of dealing with humans, W/we encounter failures and shortcomings. i "agreed" to obey, and i failed to be pleasing. the agreement is i would, and i didn't. He can accept that and discipline or correct for it, or release me as breaching the agreement. Although He agreed to be tolerant of my being human, He defines "tolerant"... so did W/we agree i could be horrid and get away with it? No. but that's what happened. So did He fail in His agreement? naw.. because the higher agreement was that W/we would strive for growth, while not allowing a negative pattern to develop.

i think the agreement is safe.

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