RE: "No Limits Slave"

RE: "No Limits Slave" (Full Version)

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LW3 -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 2:21:16 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: marieToo This is just a general comment I wanted to throw in The whole Hard limits things (especially with 'newbies' that have had no bdsm experiences) has come from those ridiculous websites with those assinine lists of what you would or wouldnt do. This then becomes the meaning of the question "what are your limits"...etc. I mean.. its valid of course to discuss with potentials what squicks you, what scares you , what thrills you etc. But when people have been looking on bdsm websites (and we all know alot of ppl begin their research online) for the past 15 years coming across the infamous "Limits Lists", it tends to become the new definition and it tends to box it in for alot of people to just mean whether or not you're willing to perform certain physical acts. yeah. that's true. but... It will do no harm answer "this slave's only limit is 'no permanent injury'" instead of "this slave don't have limits" it's a limit. an evident one but it's a limit.

charismagirrl -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 3:52:28 PM)
i agree with u marie as far as things getting skewed due to the lists and people (newbies and not) thinking that those activities lists are everything. That being said, the activities list can help open up the mind of someone as to the possibilities that are out there within the activities area. Alot don't know about alot of it and they are a great starting out place for play. However, they should in no means seem to anyone to be all inclusive of what may be called on you if you are to be a slave.There are all kinds of limits within ppl and those (the things on the activities lists) are just a fraction.

kitty2MLoneWolf -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 4:06:42 PM)
You know..it seems to me that there are lots of concepts being thrown into the fire when they are in fact different concepts. No limits does NOT equal non consensual.. but we seem to forget that slaves always do consent and believe it or not.. we can also take away consent..most would like to think that true slavery / ownership is a forever thing.. but lets be realistic (even though a few posts are forgetting we are talking about BDSM and not murdering rampaging uncontrolled unthinking adults) if someone is trying to harm me in a way to cause me disfigurement, dismemberment, or death.. I can always choose not to consent to continue to be owned by this person. To those who want their argument to be compelling.. please remember most of us are more willing to listen to your arguments when you wish to be realistic instead of sensationalistic. If I want that kind of forethought.. I can go to the movies.

Lordandmaster -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 6:32:41 PM)
That's a very good point. I mean, I'm open to most things, but sex with statues? Nuh uh. quote: ORIGINAL: marieToo The whole Hard limits things (especially with 'newbies' that have had no bdsm experiences) has come from those ridiculous websites with those assinine lists of what you would or wouldnt do.

marieToo -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 6:48:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster That's a very good point. I mean, I'm open to most things, but sex with statues? Nuh uh. all in good time. Never say never. lol

velvetears -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 7:08:34 PM)
Susan: i agree it's essential to find a responsible Master who you can trust, because no matter if you're sub/slave, have limits/no limits, when all is said and done, the verbiage is tossed aside and you are tied spread eagled to a bed, no matter what was promised or discused, the only thing thats going to keep you safe is how well you chose. i think intuition can be a good guide as well. There have been times i have ignored it and later regretted it. i liked the visual this statement gave me, "Somebody who can hold you in the palm of their hand without crushing you, but knowing they could if they wanted to is an image that springs to my mind." It reminded me of a site i stumbled onto that was full of stories about guys with a fetish for shrinking women to control them lol. A "leapof faith" almost implies to me that there was some doubt left but you were going to go try anyway. Faith means believing in something even though there is no evidence or proof, right? For me to surrender everything i am gonna needs absolute proof that i am making the right choice. But i think i understand the spirit in which you intended it to be interpreted, that you need to get to a point where you trust yourself enough to follow your instincts and not allow fear to hold you back. Mercnbeth: You are absolutely right when you say women will tolerate abuse rather then be alone. In fact there is another popular thread on this very issue going on right now. The sub admits she'd rather stay in an abusive relationship because her only alternative is to face life alone. The mind and emotions take far longer to heal then the body. The body will eventually heal, it will produce scar tissue that is even tougher then the original skin. Emotional damage is far riskier - some people can bounce back others can be broken and never the same again, it all depends on the individual, how resilient they are and many other characteristics of personality. i agree that at the end of the day labels really don't matter much. There are probably many out there living up to ideals the labels represent and don't even know it. They are just doing their own thing. i would like one day to be in a relationship again with someone, but i am in no rush. i definately want to be able to negotiate, have limits and safewords as in my last relationsip these things weren't options and after all was said and done, i simply wasn't happy. Not anxious to repeat that experience again anytime soon. i learned and grew from it and know much more about myself now then ever. i do believe a sub should do all she can to not put restraints or limitations on her dom, but that to me is different then saying she should give up all rights to have them. Thank you both for your thoughtful posts :-)

ImpGrrl -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 7:29:58 PM)
This is consensual slavery. Even those of us in absolute-type relationships must twist and warp the "real-world definition" of "slave" to make it fit. quote: ORIGINAL: Kree Re: "no limits slave" Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.0.1) - Cite This Source new! slave /sleɪv/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[sleyv] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation noun, verb, slaved, slav‧ing. –noun 1. a person who is the property of and wholly subject to another; a bond servant. 2. a person entirely under the domination of some influence or person: a slave to a drug. The term "no limits slave" makes no sense. By definition, a slave is chattel to be used by their owner for whatever purposes the owner deems proper. There have been comments that a "no limits slave" share the limits of their owner, which might be subject to change, thus changing the dynamic. The dynamic of "slave" would not change if a real world definition of slave were applied. The owner might have a radical shift in their thinking, or actions, which would not change the simple fact that a slave is "a person who is the property of and wholly subject to another, a bond servant". Perhaps there should be a BDSM law that says if you claim to be a slave, you must have the real world definition of slave tattooed on your arm and read it 10 times per day. If you claim to be a "no limits slave" you must read it 1000 times per day. I have no desire to start a discussion of submissive vs slave because we all should acknowledge that the term slave means little in a BDSM context. 99.99% of the people proclaiming their slavery are submissives with deep feelings of submission, not slaves. That other .001% likely contains some that actually do live as real world slaves, but we probably dont hear much from them because they dont sit around posting to internet boards. The word slave has become a romanticized version of "submissive" that bears little or no resemblence to the real definition of the word, thus making "no limits slave" an oxymoron at best.

angelic -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 7:40:41 PM)
wow... i've come home from work and look at all i missed today! [;)] Mercnbeth i always appreciate your thoughts and you definitely made me (almost) [;)] rethink my position. You in one post (sorry i'm just too darned tired to work with the quote thing (i'm NOT a no-limit slave) [8D]... stated that beth had limits... she had Your limits. Thank Yyou Aall for the wonderful thoughts and dialogue. (Albeit the spider thingie is a bit [:'(])... It's wonderful when a few can actually come into a thread and have a thought provoking discussion without flames (yes there are and always will be those that can't play like adults). . To those that can and do... thank you very very much.

LW3 -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 10:38:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kitty2MLoneWolf if someone is trying to harm me in a way to cause me disfigurement, dismemberment, or death.. I can always choose not to consent to continue to be owned by this person. then, as I understand, that's one of your limits. I may be wrong but this sounds to me as a limit on what your Master can do with you and it's better if (s)he knows before trying to do it and causes you to choose not to consent.

marieToo -> RE: "No Limits Slave" (9/5/2006 11:09:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: velvetears no matter if you're sub/slave, have limits/no limits, when all is said and done, the verbiage is tossed aside and you are tied spread eagled to a bed, no matter what was promised or discused, the only thing thats going to keep you safe is how well you chose. Amen.

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