Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

What exactly is an online romance?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> What exactly is an online romance? Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 3:51:44 PM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		I know  I am asking a very  simple question ...but  I find the wording  sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal  contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand  looking for  friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how  you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being  cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 4:15:43 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Think of two centuries ago, when people communicated by letter. Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen as I recall has a letter romance. The courtship of Robert Browning and Elizabeth Barrett Browning was by letter. If you can't afford to go visit every weekend, you write, chat and phone.

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 6:51:08 PM   
sophia37


Posts: 1433
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline 		celeste said it as well as I could.

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 7:02:39 PM   
Donnalee


Posts: 339
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline 		Maybe if you thought of how couples who are separated in the military keep up their romance, it would give you some ideas.  Or how non-custodial parents keep their relationship alive with their children while they're separated.  You use emails, IMs, cams, computer phone calls, cell phones, pictures, videos, text messages, phones, and letters. 

My husband and I met overseas and corresponded (before the internet) by letter and phone in between twice monthly visits.  We were married within 8 months of the first meeting, and have been for 16 years.  It's not something new with the internet!

I think you'll find some biases against anything but full time face to face relationships on these boards and others, but there are plenty of people that are heavily invested in them and feel the full range of emotions associated with any other form of romance.

(in reply to sophia37)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 7:08:02 PM   
Noah


Posts: 1660
Joined: 7/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

I know  I am asking a very  simple question ...but  I find the wording  sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal  contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand  looking for  friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how  you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being  cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding


What, exactly, is an offline romance?

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 8:24:43 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

I know  I am asking a very  simple question ...but  I find the wording  sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal  contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand  looking for  friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how  you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being  cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding


I think your question is centered around relationships that are purely relegated to the cyber realm. If I'm correct I can understand your confusion because these situations have not been solidified in the flesh. As we all know it is easy to become emotionally and mentally beholden to someone, but the lack of physical contact does not provide the validation of these feelings on either side. For some this is an ideal way of relating that fits into their particular circumstance without complication. I believe it is possible to develop a connection, but I would never trade a look, touch, or the comfort of someone's arms for random keystrokes and conversation on the internet.

porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 9:36:23 PM   
Noah


Posts: 1660
Joined: 7/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: porcelaine
...

I believe it s possible to develop a connection, but I would never trade a look, touch, or the comfort of someone's arms for random keystrokes and conversation on the internet.

porcelaine


Never? That was the word you used.

If your beloved partner was across the state on business or confined to a foreign hospital you would actually prefer to take physical comforts with some third person who happened to be in arm's reach rather than, say, talk to your lover on the phone or via chat if that was the most intimate option available?

That's your business, I guess.

But what do "random keystrokes and conversation" have to do with the question? In what way are the words and letters of any romance--near at hand or far--profitably seen as random?

As for me, when my girlfriend is not with me I would--and in fact often do-- gladly trade away (random or otherwise) physical strokes and conversation off of the internet with someone else for the chance to conduct my relationship with her at a distance by phone or in chat.

In fact she would not now be my girlfriend but for the romance we first conducted over the internet, through the mail and on the phone.

We all like rubbing, porcelaine, but isn't romance a meeting of hearts and souls first of all?

(in reply to porcelaine)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 9:46:10 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Noah, do you recall the name of the movie where hannibal lector and mrs robinson kept up this long correspondence over the pond and they were booksellers?

Winston Churchill and his old lady traded a couple posts. Et Al.

In fact, before the internet there were many long distance love affairs carried out with no or little physical contact.

if myron kant were here today, he could wax long and eloquent about these things., why don't you Noah?

LOL,
Mycroft Kant, esq.  capitalist and philosopher. 

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to Noah)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 10:45:24 PM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Noah,

Give us all a break, you are intelligent enough to know what she meant, in fact, she clearly spelled it out. 

I read all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Tolkien books, all of the Narnia series, and even an obscure series called The Stainless Steel Rat and a couple of others over the phone to my pet while she was away at school.  However, we had and did spend time with each other and had a "real" relationship prior and even during the time apart.

Of course I would rather spend time with her on the phone than cheat on her, but that isn't what porcelaine meant and she clearly spelled it out.

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 10:50:53 PM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline 		I met my husband, quite accidently, via an online romance. Mostly it was over the phone, to be honest, with very little online after we got to that stage. Except for the nasty photos and videos of course.
When you spend 4 - 5 hours a night on the phone for a year you get to know someone pretty well. Once we met in person and confirmed the chemistry was the same, we were married a couple of months later.

Usually, though, online romance does not transfer to real life.  It's a huge risk. I strongly recommend people that have online romances to meet immediately so you don't spend years of your life on a fantasy.**

Akasha

** in the case of my "online romance" - I was still dating men in real life because I didn't think the online thing would ever stand the test of real life. Oops. my bad.


_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/4/2006 10:53:05 PM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Noah




What, exactly, is an offline romance?



This is just a stab in the dark on my part.  But Im guessing that an offline romance, is a romance that is conducted.....ummm....offline. 

This question is even worse than  "what is a farm supply store?".  lmaooo...Sorry, I couldnt resist. :) 


(in reply to Noah)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/5/2006 6:46:25 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		Well, WTF?


Don't leave us hanging here, M2.........what is it?


Ron


_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to marieToo)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/5/2006 6:53:34 AM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

Well, WTF?


Don't leave us hanging here, M2.........what is it?


Ron



Its my practice to never leave good men 'hanging'. lol

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/5/2006 6:53:45 AM   
kitty2MLoneWolf


Posts: 149
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Noah,

I read all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Tolkien books, all of the Narnia series, and even an obscure series called The Stainless Steel Rat and a couple of others over the phone to my pet while she was away at school. 


Falls in lust over CD once again.. Damn man.. you ARE the perfect male! LOL

_____________________________

used to be jessieme but I got a life <grin>

Dont worry about what other people think....they dont do it very often!

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/5/2006 7:22:29 AM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		I think in many ways online romance can be a lot more thrilling and prolong the oooh ahhh factor awhile.  On the Internet you don't deal so much with the reality of daily living and can concentrate on one another and all those things that you adore about each other.  It is romantic and a lovely fantasy.  When that type of situation compliments a real time situation in the example of a long distance relationship or temporary separation, it can be a lot of fun.  For example, when we were moving to Houston from Cali, my husband left 4 months before I did.  We had a pretty healthy internet romance going on during that time.  Romantic, hot and although online it was based in reality.

But, when online is all you have and all you ever will have, it is only fantasy.  The feelings of romance can still be there much the same as when you have a crush on a star after watching a great movie or you dream about the hero in your favorite book.  Pleasurable, sure.  Will that translate to the same feelings in real life?  Maybe, maybe not. 

I am with Akasha here with if you meet someone online, try to meet in person sooner than later.  If all you want is the fantasy, entertain yourself, knock yourself out.  But if you want someone there with you, at some point fantasy must meet reality and better sooner than later.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to kitty2MLoneWolf)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What exactly is an online romance? - 9/5/2006 7:22:47 PM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		Then , if I may  ask this question concerning online romancing here. So if someone states this in their profile interest that they are seeking "online romance",  then is it another way of saying "a longterm  relationship."Or is it differnt. I really am trying to figure out  if the two terms  should mean the same thing  so that I am clear on their meanings.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
Profile   Post #: 16
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> What exactly is an online romance? Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.168