RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (Full Version)

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puella -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 4:08:03 AM)

Though I am generally a bit disdainful (personally) of people who offer requirements to random strangers on internet chat sites, especially about physical appearance, I do not see anything so wildly offensive about the OP.  There certainly is nothing more offensive in  why  people would take the time and effort to post a picture to represent themselves which is obviously not the most flattering, than there is in say... asking why so many submissives are fat, or asking to only chit chat with girls who are much much younger.. the list of offensive threads on these forums is innumerable.  We live in an age where physical beauty reigns supreme in the processing of many things, including over all desirability.  Not all of us (myself included) may like that, but it does not change the reality of our society. 



twicehappy -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 4:34:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: puella

Not all of us (myself included) may like that, but it does not change the reality of our society. 


Nor will it if we keep accepting it as the way to behave either.



marieToo -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 4:47:55 AM)

FP:

Your new photos are very sweet. [:)]



MissyRane -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 8:19:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Personally I don't care wether a person even has a photo up at all. Two of my favourite CM posters do not have photos on their profiles. I care more about the person they reflect in their words than any dolled up photographic image.

Wise words[:)] and I have to agree to them too because I don't give a damn whether a person has a picture or not but it BUGS THE SHIT OUTTA ME when I'm just chillin' browsing through profiles..AND the damn search thingy always JUMPS OVER the damn profiles without picture it just plain sucks and discriminates against profiles that don't share a pic[:'(] I recommend changes!



Yang4yin -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 8:49:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

..AND the damn search thingy always JUMPS OVER the damn profiles without picture it just plain sucks and discriminates against profiles that don't share a pic[:'(] I recommend changes!



When you start your search, try unchecking "Photos Only."



FelinePersuasion -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 9:45:55 AM)

Thank you marie!:) I had them taken after the job  information interveiw I went to:D even after brushing my hair down the tips are still curling:D

quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

FP:

Your new photos are very sweet. [:)]



MissyRane -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 11:10:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Yang4yin

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

..AND the damn search thingy always JUMPS OVER the damn profiles without picture it just plain sucks and discriminates against profiles that don't share a pic[:'(] I recommend changes!



When you start your search, try unchecking "Photos Only."

I don't have it ticked...but when you choose "profile >>"  then it always picks up the profiles that use pictures..and it pisses me off!



jesskitty -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 12:48:38 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AbstractSavant

I honestly see nothing wrong with wishing people would present themselves nicely in personal-ad photographs. I wouldn't be apt to respond to soemone that looked unkempt, no matter how well-worded the profile.

i'm confused about what your talking about here. your talking about not wanting to respond to someone that looks unkempt, but i was merely saying that it doesn't matter personally to me and personally i belive he's showing an example of how american society is conditioning people to think. sure there is always a amount of physical attraction but once again this is the itnernet and people can be photogenic or not and look abit different in pictures than in real life so i don't think you can truly be physically attracted to the person until you see them in person. furthermore, i'm assuming your making a response to my makeup response, so do you belive not having makeup on and being natural with what we entered the world as is being unkempt?  i belive there is a difference between not being hygenical and not wearing makeup,having your own personal style/self to your pictures.



puella -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:33:22 PM)

I guess.... the thing is, there is nothing wrong with finding certain things desirable, in fact it is very natural.. sometimes those things are greatly impacted by a societal view and conditioning, sometimes they are innate, either way, they are a part of who you are and a part of what you naturally find attractive.

To expect others to relearn a new 'natural attraction' is not only unlikely to happen, but judgmental.  You are in effect just imposing upon them your standards of attraction.

I am assuming this man desires more than a tidy picture to identify a partner, but the fact of the matter is, he is looking at the external representation.  Sometimes, the way we choose to visually represent ourselves says a lot about how we view ourselves.

All in all he said nothing inflammatory or insulting... he did not call anyone names, he just noted that there is a lot of 'untidiness' about some of the pictures.  I find that personally less detestable than calling subbies fat or old or ugly or... the list goes on to some of the things we have seen here on these forums.

I am also willing to bet I am giving this guy a lot more credit than he deserves in thinking his post runs even to that depth.. hehe.




TreSwank -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:39:35 PM)

I think that this fellow's underlying message is, "Focus your effects into making yourself pretty and presentable to males, according to abitrary masculine opinion, even if our profile pics happen to be the portrait of blandness."  How the fuck are you gonna take two hours to get ready for the bar, when a man won't even use conditioner, or take the time to gel up his hair for you?

What do you girls think about that?  I mean, keep in mind that all of this is coming from a fellow who, despite putting a great emphasis on presentability, doesn't even smile in his profile pic.  I definitely AIN'T the portrait of attractive male, but at least I've the "smiling" part down cold.  TreSwank may be an asshole who refers to himself in the third person, but he's never gonna tell a woman that her aesthetic-sense isn't good enough to suit his tastes.



LaTigresse -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:46:51 PM)

Spanky, sounds good if you can convince the women of it![:D]



MrrPete -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:52:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

Well, I thought my pic was at least presentable.


I think it is.



puella -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:58:08 PM)

Well, Senior Swanky...

In general, given the medium we are in... I do not think he is terribly off base.  He is a dominant male addressing submissive females ( or I am assuming those are the profiles he is perving).  Generally speaking, in a sort 'personals' type of site, I do not think that his suggesting to submissives to present themselves to Dominant men with a bit of care is all that shocking, whether you subscribe to his sentiments or not.  Most of the Doms/ Masters I have known tend to be quite interested in the way a woman chooses to present herself to a Dominant.



cuddleheart50 -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 2:58:25 PM)

Thank you MrrPete. [:D]



MistressDeAnnya -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 3:00:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DougDammitt

Well Sexy Red, often we do things for security reasons.  Play safe, play smart - stalkers can love you to death.


You have your reasons for doing what you do, and others have thiers. Such is life.
 
Mistress DeAnnya
p.s. hiding behind sunglasses wont save your life.. but a respectable attitude might.
<shakes head>



Mercnbeth -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 3:00:50 PM)

Damn, and we just put our pictures out there so people can see what we look like. I need to go look at them again and make sure the background is "acceptable". Sorry!



LaTigresse -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 3:06:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

Damn, and we just put our pictures out there so people can see what we look like. I need to go look at them again and make sure the background is "acceptable". Sorry!


I thought so also but I guess we are supposed to be marketing our "wares".



puella -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 3:15:06 PM)

I am not suggesting that you or anyone else has to  to do anything with their pictures, including posting any at all.  I am saying that if this guy was looking at pictures sent to him by submissives looking for a relationship or on their personal ad posted here on Collarme (presumably stating they are looking for a partner of some sort), and given this is  a site which deals with (to some degree) finding a partner within the lifestyle... then his OP is not completely out of bounds.  Not everyone here IS looking to meet someone... but those who are...well, it doesn't seem like rocket science to me, but then again, it also doesn't really matter.



LaTigresse -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 3:21:07 PM)

You are correct, I was just having fun with it.



MstrDouglas -> RE: Presenting Yourself in Pictures (9/11/2006 4:09:30 PM)

My preference is to have someone show me the everyday person in their photos.  I dislike the ones that they have either had taken professionally or spent half the day getting "gussied up" for.  Give me the real, everyday, "down and dirty" person, the kind that you know you will recognize them if you were to meet them on the street.  And yes I do know mine has a wierd overall color to it, dont know what happened, other than using a cheap digital camera to take it, I'll have to try to get a better one up. 



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