Do you believe in instant emotional connections, aka "love at first sight?"

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Do you believe in instant emotional connections, aka &q... - 9/12/2006 10:41:57 AM

GeekyGirl

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I'm just curious how many of you felt an instant connection or a "love at first sight" type feeling when you met your partner.

Obviously "love" , true love, is something that takes time and trust to build. But what I'm referring to is that feeling of "I've known you all my life" or feeling instantly "at home" with someone as if you'd been involved with them for years.

If you did have that instant feeling of connection, did it last or did it just burn passionately for a short time and then dissipate?

I ask because I met a wonderful dominant this weekend whom I had been corresponding with via phone and email for a couple of weeks and as soon as I met him, I felt as if he were my best friend. I was just immediately comfortable with him. We spent the night hanging out and cuddling on his bed watching movies like an old married couple.

After hanging out for several hours,we eventually proceeded to become physically intimate and there was none of the awkwardess that usually accompanie a first encounter with a new partner. It was like we just "read" each other perfectly. It was the oddest experience of my life, but also one of the most pleasant.

I spent the majority of the weekend with him and I just feel this amazing connection such as I've never felt before (not even with my ex husband.) It was just WEIRD.

So I guess I'm just wandering how many others have gone through that and how it worked out for them. I don't want to fall head over heels for this guy too quickly but I'm having a very hard time keeping my feelings in check. I don't want to become too infatuated too quickly and then get hurt...but things just feel so RIGHT with him! I've had plenty of lovers/sex partners in my past but never felt anything like this before.

Has anyone else had a similiar experience?

< Message edited by GeekyGirl -- 9/12/2006 10:43:10 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:04:32 AM

subinsouth

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Joined: 6/20/2006
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i have had this same sort of experience - - - something just clicked when you are able to look them in the eyes. it is a scary feeling at best. . . .but hey, how do you stop a freight train? you will never know until you try so just sit back and enjoy the bliss. good luck to you!

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may it be for me as You will

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Post #: 2

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:05:57 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl
I'm just curious how many of you felt an instant connection or a "love at first sight" type feeling when you met your partner.

I've felt it before, and not felt it. I certainly didn't feel it at all with my older partner.

quote:

If you did have that instant feeling of connection, did it last or did it just burn passionately for a short time and then dissipate?

Yes to all. :)

quote:

So I guess I'm just wandering how many others have gone through that and how it worked out for them. I don't want to fall head over heels for this guy too quickly but I'm having a very hard time keeping my feelings in check. I don't want to become too infatuated too quickly and then get hurt...but things just feel so RIGHT with him! I've had plenty of lovers/sex partners in my past but never felt anything like this before.

Has anyone else had a similiar experience?

Sure. In poly it's known as "new relationship energy" or "NRE" because, as we are open to new partners, we can experience that connection much more freely and frequently than monogamous people.

It's great that it feels right for you, just remember your own words- it still takes time. Time will see whether your new relationship energy will firm itself into a lasting strong connection between you both.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 3

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:10:55 AM

OhReallyNow

Posts: 249
Joined: 9/11/2006
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With my late Master it was an instant connection that lasted and strengthened for more than 5 years, until his passing.
With my other relationships, there was a small tug of attraction but nothing compared to what I had felt previously. Both those relationships have settled into just play sessions now.

_____________________________

~ When anger rises, think of the consequences
CONFUCIUS ~

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Post #: 4

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:12:44 AM

Mavis

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i call it "x-factor chemistry" and it's rare, but it does happen. isn't it great? But i don't think it is that much of an indicator of if a relationship will "make it"... although not having to make some hurdles definately gives you a leg up. Taking it sensible, and it looks like you are.. realising there is still time in grade to build something.. and also realising that your x-factor might have clicked, but it's possible it was just anothr good date for Him.. don't let expectations jam up the works. Good luck!
:)

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 5

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:18:10 AM

sweetpamela

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oh i believe in it...when i met i had been emailing and talking on the phone with my partner and when we finally met and he kissed me for the first time...he took my breath away and i knew right then and there that we were meant for each other. when we became intimate it was incredible and such a natural event...we never felt uncomfortable around each other and we still feel this way. we can not wait to see each other and the more we talk, text, email, and see each other the more we fall in love...

best of luck to you!

sweetpamela

(in reply to Mavis)

Post #: 6

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:26:58 AM

mstrjx

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Joined: 11/27/2005
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It has happened to me on plenty of occasions, but I have actually tried to curtail that sort of thing lately. Maybe I'm answering a different question altogether.

With this Lifestyle and the Internet Age I, like a lot of people, don't find (basically don't look for) people in the produce department of the grocery store. You are more likely to meet at a scene gathering, if a personal face-to-face meeting is for the first time. I haven't been to one of those in a while, although I know I should.

So, the way I've met most people over the years was by telephone (yes, before the Internet there were phone personal ads) or via the web. I've met some wonderful people over the years, and others, too (how diplomatic). I used to engage in some wonderful flirty conversations with a level of emotional connection prior to meeting.

Lately, however, over the past few years, my approach is to go slower. I try not to get caught up in 'leading', emotional conversations before meeting. Enough to know whether meeting is important, sure, but I don't want 'that' much of a connection to form until I meet someone. I don't wish for someone to like me too much, which is quite possible, only to find out that I resemble a horribly mutated troll. (I blame it on my genes.) It just doesn't seem fair.

So, no trolls for you, until meeting. At that point, I'd love to get swept off my deformed trollish feet.

Jeff

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Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

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Post #: 7

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:29:28 AM

cuddleheart50

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From: Kentucky
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I've never felt "love" at first sight...but I have felt "lust" at first sight.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to mstrjx)

Post #: 8

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:36:58 AM

losttreasure

Posts: 875
Joined: 12/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

I ask because I met a wonderful dominant this weekend whom I had been corresponding with via phone and email for a couple of weeks...

Yes, in the sense that you've noted above; you might have only just met him in person, but you'd gotten to know about him online for a while first.

I cannot speak for FirmHandKy, but when he and I first met, it felt like... coming home. I think I surprised him when taking his proferred hand as I did not shake it, but instead stepped up and kissed him.

That connection for me has not diminished in the least, and though it's only been a few months, I don't forsee it changing. Of course, life comes with no guarantees... but to catch the brass ring, you must reach out for it.

Best wishes.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 9

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:40:33 AM

Dnomyar

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Joined: 6/27/2005
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Love and lust are not the same. You can have both feelings at the same time. With lust you want to sleep with the person and send them home. With love you want to sleep with the person and keep them there.

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

Post #: 10

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:43:51 AM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
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quote:

With lust you want to sleep with the person and send them home. With love you want to sleep with the person and keep them there.

That's an oversimplification.

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- Albert Einstein

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 11

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 11:44:46 AM

cuddleheart50

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Yep, I totally agree with that.

_____________________________

Dance like no one is watching,
Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you've never been hurt
and live like it's heaven on Earth.

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 12

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 12:16:33 PM

GeekyGirl

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Joined: 8/21/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

I've never felt "love" at first sight...but I have felt "lust" at first sight.

See for me, it wasn't about lust....the lust kicked in after several hours of just "being together". We spent pretty much the whole weekend together and only ended up in the bedroom twice...the rest of the time we just sat and talked about anything and everything.

For most of the weekend, sex wasn't really on our minds. But when it happened it was awesome :)

I think that's what really got me....the fact that sex wasn't such a big part of things.

That said, over the course of the weekend, I have developed quite a bit of lust for him. :) He's the first guy in a little while that I've met who has all the physical traits I find attractive.

_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

Post #: 13

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 12:18:26 PM

GeekyGirl

Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Love and lust are not the same. You can have both feelings at the same time. With lust you want to sleep with the person and send them home. With love you want to sleep with the person and keep them there.

I tend to agree with this. One of the greatest parts of the weekend was just lying down in his arms and going to sleep with my head on his shoulder. I like the phrase used by Losttreasure. It was definately a feeling of coming home :)

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Post #: 14

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 12:22:04 PM

amativedame

Posts: 331
Joined: 9/23/2005
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I think love at first sight exists depending on your definition of love. To use your definition ("I've known you all my life") I think it does, and I have experienced it myself. I've never had mine burn out or dissipate... then again my actual definition of love would be different than that. I've had several "at sight" connections (which is what they are to me,) and to this day I've always kept in contact with each and every one of them although they don't always become more than friends.

My one play partner is a great example of that really, we would never work out in a real relationship sense, but our connection makes us great friends and great lovers. Just try to keep things in perspective. Great connections don't always mean great relationships. Its not bad to hope but try not to count your chickens before they hatch.

_____________________________

Always remember that great love and great achievements both involve great risk.

(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 15

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 12:24:09 PM

GeekyGirl

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Joined: 8/21/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mavis

and also realising that your x-factor might have clicked, but it's possible it was just anothr good date for Him.. don't let expectations jam up the works. Good luck!
:)

That's a point that I found kind of interesting. After the first night, I didn't tell him how I felt about him because I didn't want to sound like a stereotypical silly girl...but to my suprise, he told me the next day that he felt like he had known me before (at which point I admitted to having similiar feelings.)

I'm not known for jumping into relationships or being overly sentimental, so this is all very odd and new to me. It normally takes me a LONG time to gain an emotional connection with someone. I just don't hand my heart out easily, you know?

< Message edited by GeekyGirl -- 9/12/2006 12:26:25 PM >

(in reply to Mavis)

Post #: 16

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 12:31:52 PM

agirl

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Joined: 6/14/2004
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No-one elses experiences can validate what you feel/felt. They may SOUND similar and even correspond quite closely but they won't involve you or the chap concerned.

I couldn't possibly entertain the idea *loving* someone in a matter of weeks. I COULD certainly feel a *gelling* of some kind, but it'd be in a very limited fashion.

Yes, I've felt a *connection* with certain people in this way, but experience has shown me that it's not something for me, personally, to get too excited about , especially in a *relationship* sense. Newness and freshness can be extremely heady and there's a certain *light* that this can cast over many a thing. No matter how many positive *clicks* there are .........after that short amount of time there are FAR, FAR more things that are just not known.

These are the things that I'd say to my own daughter, who is the same age.

A few weeks and one meeting?....A nice beginning, a possible *good thing*.

The possibility is that you're on the threshold of something perfectly amazing..............but then again.........lol

agirl

(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 17

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 1:00:45 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
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It wasn't love at first site, but I felt connected with my girl after spending time with her energy. I have connected to a number of people, not just my girl, that way.

Master Fire

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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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(in reply to GeekyGirl)

Post #: 18

RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 1:18:17 PM

kimba1

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Joined: 4/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure
That connection for me has not diminished in the least, and though it's only been a few months, I don't forsee it changing. Of course, life comes with no guarantees... but to catch the brass ring, you must reach out for it.

oh my yes, smiles, it has been over a year now since my Master collared me, and we fell in love online, and when we met, it just confirmed that feeling of recognition and total connection we had had earlier. Love at first sight? before Him, I would have said, no way. Now, absolutely, and for us, amazingly, it just gets deeper and deeper every precious day ...

btw, i HAD to include that great quote by losttreasure!

(in reply to losttreasure)

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RE: Do you believe in instant emotional connections, ak... - 9/12/2006 1:20:22 PM

GeekyGirl

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Kimba, I think I'm like you...I never believed in it before. Now I'm changing my mind a bit.

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Post #: 20

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