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Masters - 9/13/2006 7:21:24 PM   
sweeth0nesty


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/28/2005
Status: offline 		When a master tells you one thing, like you will be my slave until the time i can no longer be a master, and then i will release you/give you to another is that a red flag? Also, when he directs that he wants things this way, and gives a list, then does nothing, what is a slave to do?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:24:21 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Is this an internet dom?

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
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RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:28:50 PM   
jazzygal


Posts: 6
Joined: 9/13/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweeth0nesty

When a master tells you one thing, like you will be my slave until the time i can no longer be a master, and then i will release you/give you to another is that a red flag? Also, when he directs that he wants things this way, and gives a list, then does nothing, what is a slave to do?


It would be a red flag for me, whether he were an internet dom or one you have spent time with. 

You should do whatever your mind tells you is the smart thing to do.  Personally I would tell him to get a clue and walk out the door.

Everything is a two way street.

jazz

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:31:09 PM   
sweeth0nesty


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/28/2005
Status: offline 		no i live with him

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:31:50 PM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline 		Giving/selling to another makes for wonderful fantasy, but should not be thought of as serious, unless that's your deal (I suppose).

If a Dominant gives a list of rules or requirements, but doesn't follow through on them, what kind of Dominant could that be?

Hopefully, if you call yourself 'a' slave as you mention, you are not 'his' slave.

Words are meaningless without some substance behind them.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
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RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:34:41 PM   
sweeth0nesty


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/28/2005
Status: offline 		I am his slave, wasn't like this when we 1st moved in together but now things seem to have changed. I have know him a little over a year and things were great, then the move in and now its like were living our own lives sperate but together without the s/m

(in reply to mstrjx)
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RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:36:57 PM   
angelic


Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline 		i am a bit confused about the last part of your OP.  He gave you a list of things to do... why does he need to do anything, i mean if he gave you the list to accomplish and how he wanted it done and you are the slave.....  (i'm tired and it may just be my brain is overloaded).

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~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci


(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
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RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 7:55:11 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		It says in your profile that he is looking for another slave to add to your household. I think he has more than enough slaves living with him already.
It sounds to me like he has tired of bdsm play with you, and there is nothing else there in the relationship. This is the slow agonizing part that will not end until you leave or he releases you.

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Boycott Whales!

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
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RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 8:01:05 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		It sounds from what information that you have given that he isn't really too interested in the BDSM as he is in having a housekeeper perhaps? Also this giving you away thing, don't go along with that unless its some kink you have, its just his way of saying "Once Im tired of you I'm going to pawn you off on this other guy."..You deserve better then that and if he is looking for a new slave when he can't even deal effectively with the one he has, makes him a fairly weak Dominant. At least thats my opinion.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 8:05:57 PM   
sweeth0nesty


Posts: 6
Joined: 7/28/2005
Status: offline 		no not a list of things to do, things he says he is going to do to make it a more master/slave relatationship then does nothing

(in reply to angelic)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 8:09:56 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweeth0nesty
When a master tells you one thing, like you will be my slave until the time i can no longer be a master, and then i will release you/give you to another is that a red flag?

No, it's being honest.  You have to decide if you want that sort of relationship or not.

quote:

Also, when he directs that he wants things this way, and gives a list, then does nothing, what is a slave to do?

Uhhh what should he be doing? 

I guess if you've got a problem then you need to go to him and say "I am confused about this, can you help clarify?" and go from there.

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 9/13/2006 8:10:55 PM >

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 8:12:24 PM   
PrimitiveLogic


Posts: 145
Joined: 4/25/2006
From: Md.
Status: offline 		Sounds like the old marriage adage...He said," I do.'", then didn't. Far too often once the chase has ended, everything else does as well. It is an odd dynamic when the woman has to withhold herself in order to keep his interest; instead of becoming everything they both thought things would be.
Like the other posts have spoken...protect yourself by being your own best advocate.

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 8:55:22 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PrimitiveLogic

Sounds like the old marriage adage...He said," I do.'", then didn't. Far too often once the chase has ended, everything else does as well. It is an odd dynamic when the woman has to withhold herself in order to keep his interest; instead of becoming everything they both thought things would be.
Like the other posts have spoken...protect yourself by being your own best advocate.


Been to that rodeo, and I do not want to ride that bull again....smiles. I thought D/s could help get a couple past stupid vanilla games like that one...

To the OP, it sounds as though you are not fully collared to this master of yours. You have to decide if you are ok with his terms, if you are not, I hope you have a way to move on with your life economically and emotionally. I would be planning for the day of my release so I would not be devasted by it with the prospect of homelessness.

Personally that situation would not work for me, and I would be searching for the escape pod, and if you have your gut telling you it is a red flag, his behavior is one... to you, and you are the one living with him so I guess your opinion is all that matters....

Take care of number one if he is talking about how he is going to release you.



_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to PrimitiveLogic)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Masters - 9/13/2006 9:18:02 PM   
AbstractSavant


Posts: 149
Joined: 6/5/2005
Status: offline 		It seems like he's trying to control your behavior and keep you in line by appealing to your fears of loss and rejection.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 12:20:33 AM   
ayasha


Posts: 149
Joined: 12/10/2005
Status: offline 		Until He can no longer be a Master?  What the heck kind of statement is that?  A Master is a Master till He dies - if He becomes ill, then the slave takes care of Him. 

He doesn't need to make a list of what to do to make things better - He needs to get off His ass and do it.  If He doesn't, it says a lot.  Do you support Him financially?  Do you sleep with Him/have sex with Him?  Are you the housekeeper/chef/laundress?  What is He getting out of keeping you around?  More importantly, what are YOU getting - it sounds like not very much. 

This one sees huge red flags - been there, done that.  If the relationship started out D/s and is not like that anymore, then one doubts it will get better.  Do you want to continue like this, or do you need more?  You  may have to make the decision in your own best interest. 

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 12:32:25 AM   
slave4Darby3d


Posts: 106
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		...the only thing the slave can do...

talk to the Master.  Communication is the key to any fulfilling and successful relationship.

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 12:43:00 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweeth0nesty
When a master tells you one thing, like you will be my slave until the time i can no longer be a master, and then i will release you/give you to another is that a red flag?

No, it's being honest.  You have to decide if you want that sort of relationship or not.

quote:

Also, when he directs that he wants things this way, and gives a list, then does nothing, what is a slave to do?

Uhhh what should he be doing? 

I guess if you've got a problem then you need to go to him and say "I am confused about this, can you help clarify?" and go from there.

I'll second LA's comments on this.  You've asked two separate questions which each deal with a separate issue.  The first question deals with the terms of a relationship you've apparently already agreed too, but I'll come back to that in a bit.

The second question is a bit vague, not enough info really to make any sort of judgement.  I'm going to take a guess based on some other comments.  Apparently, this list involved S&M activities that he isn't doing with you, that this is what he isn't doing that has you upset.  Two points here, strictly speaking as a Slave you don't have a right to demand that of him.  If you really want it and he won't provide then you have one option, walk out the door.  Second, if you're mostly interest in BDSM then you might be a Bottom, not a Slave.  Something to think about.  But before you go running for the door, I'd take LA's advice and discuss it with him and see what you can work out.  It might be possible you could work towards earning that BDSM play as a reward for providing other services.

So to sum up, on the first point, no that's not a red flag.  Its not to everyone's taste but it is sometimes part of Master / Slave relationships.  As to the second question, not enough enough to really say but its not sounding good for the relationship which sounds like it needs work on both your parts if its going to have any chance of surviving.

< Message edited by Padriag -- 9/14/2006 12:45:36 AM >

_____________________________

Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 2:03:01 AM   
eyesopened


Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline 		In my opinion He means "until i can no longer be Master [to you].  To me it sounds like He is no longer interested in a BDSM relationship with you (obviously) but likes you enough as a person that he doesn't want to just throw you out on your own and would like to find a replacement Master for you as He is finding a replacement slave.  He's trying to be kind but not doing a very good job of it.  i suspect you already know this, i suspect you already know the answer to your own question. 

_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to Padriag)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 2:14:35 AM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline 		greeting
 
i think i am hope i am not wrong this man may be not a true master, from what i understand master do not just give away someone without telling you why and what for and if your not collar you do not need to stay. there are some wonderful master wonderful strong honorable and with trust find someone better he is not it love and having a master does not mean using ot to give away
 
i wish you luck
 
mons

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Masters - 9/14/2006 3:06:31 AM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah, it sounds to  me like things aren't "working", at least for him, but he's not reeady to release you for whatever reason.  I'm with julia on this one...this definitely wouldn't work for me.  I'd leave.  Now, that's easy for me to say as I am financially secure (whatever the heck that means)...I have a good job and can support me and mine.

(in reply to sweeth0nesty)
Profile   Post #: 20
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