RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak and Spinless? "

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/16/2006 9:24:01 PM

Lordandmaster

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I don't like spineless subs because I'm not sexually attracted to invertebrates.

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/17/2006 4:14:58 PM

degradess

Posts: 68
Joined: 7/15/2005
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Some do find it easier to go into the sub domain by becoming totally subservient. I was a sub for some time and , depending on the dom, it works. I am in the position to compare both sides since I am tryng to go pro domme. I could theorize that too much subserviance led to my burn out, among other reasons. As a domme I would generally agree that in a long term domme/slave arrangement the "yes mistress" could get old without some intelligence in the rest of daily life. As a pro of course the total subserviance serves my interests so it has a place. The idea of it taking more strength to let go is accurate also, as I do have a dom, just one, and it took a lot for me to totally surrender control , but it had a freeing affect on me. Since then I have embarked on my journey into being a domme, and I credit that to his bringing out that strength in me.

(in reply to MistressDolly)

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/17/2006 6:08:58 PM

mellian

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I get the impression that for alot of good Dommes they prefer a sub that is not weak or spineless as they to easy to dominate, along with being to dependent and not really able to take care of themselves.

-mellian

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 2:33:31 AM

lilshmekel

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im new to this. and dont think of myself as weak. granted i have not popped my "bdsm cherry"...meaning its only a fantasy so far. But the thing is, i would not want a dom who also wasn't someone i considered a friend as well. Meeting the right person is hard...and online seems impossiable...

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 3:10:55 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
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From: Philadelphia, PA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: lilshmekel

im new to this. and dont think of myself as weak. granted i have not popped my "bdsm cherry"...meaning its only a fantasy so far. But the thing is, i would not want a dom who also wasn't someone i considered a friend as well. Meeting the right person is hard...and online seems impossiable...

It's a smart thing that if you want to meet someone and serve them in person that you buck up and go MEET real BDSM people! You're going to have to do it one of these days to get where you want to be!

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 5:37:50 AM

WhiteRadiance

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I do not equate submission with weakness. I believe it takes true strength to submit.

No matter what someone calls themselves- they all have thoughts and opinions of their own. And being submissive does not mean you have no rights at all.

Perhaps you think being obediant is a sign of weakness.
Saying "yes Mistress, yes Mistress" may actually take a great deal of spine and strength.. in the case of my own sub, it certainly does.

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 8:52:11 AM

strob

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDolly

Greetings Strob,

First, I believe you're referring to "slaves", not subs. Real slaves relinquish all their rights, wants and desires, subs do not.

Well thank you all for nice replies to my post; it seems that you all are very unanimous about what you prefer...I suppose I should have asked are any of Dommes prefer slaves rather then subs.

greetings
mario

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 9:46:26 AM

maledave777

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Joined: 8/5/2006
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strob,

I am a sub and not a slave. I would prefer to find a Dominant Woman looking for a sub. I feel she would want me to think for myself sometimes. I feel she would like my opinion about some things. I feel she does want me to have a backbone. As a sub, I willingly give myself to serve her.

maledave777

< Message edited by maledave777 -- 9/18/2006 9:49:05 AM >

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 9:49:48 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
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I like slaves...but it does not mean I want a mindless, weak or spineless one. Regardless of whether one identifies as a sub or slave it does not mean that the person can not have opinions and be able to express them. I don't equate submission or slavery to mindelss, spineless or weak

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/18/2006 10:21:41 AM

BlkTallFullfig

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quote:

ORIGINAL: strob
I should have asked are any of Dommes prefer slaves rather then subs.
mario

Yes, I would prefer a slave if all things were equal, though in reality, things never are that simple... M

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/19/2006 10:03:28 AM

MistressDolly

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Hi Strob,

Regarding your question of preferance between a slave or a sub: it all depends on the level of submission I am looking for. Currently, I don't need a REAL slave but I know someone who needs and desires slaves and buys them at slave auctions for one year or longer contracts. These slaves relinquish ALL their rights and go through intensive training before being auctioned off. Again, it's not easy to be a real slave and they are by far weak.

Real slave or sub, both surrender their wills - except a real slave does it on a more intense level.

( By real slave, I am not referring to subs who play a slave in scenes. I call my subs "slave" all the time while playing.)

Submission is not only a desire, it is a DECISION and I respect both slaves and subs.

I hope this answers your question.

Fondly,
Dolly

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/19/2006 10:12:11 AM

FLsubmalecd

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My Domme said it best I think. She wants a submissive, but not a doormat. I am not a doormat but will obey and serve M' Lady in any way She desires minus some mutually agreed upon hard limits. I am not weak and definately not spineless. Who would want such a person?

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/19/2006 11:47:10 AM

Dommeseeksone

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LOL... If I wanted a spinless brainless twitt where would be the pleasure. I would just go buy more batteries. A slave is someone who should think and be able to respectfully ecspress thier thaughts to me. Even if my word is the last one. But where is the submission it all if they never had a thaught or spine to begin with. And hell let's face it I still want a man not a worn to warm my bed.

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 3:31:29 PM

MistressTaboo

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My husband is my slave…he’s not a spineless yes man…in his work he’s a very macho dominate male…complete with the Texas man swagger…but at home he’s very much a slave… Does he disagree? Yes…does he have an opinion? Yes? Does it count for much…depends on what it is…Kids and finances we are equal…all else I rule. If he whines that the time I set for his chastity is too long I don’t even acknowledge it, unless he gets repetitive then I just extend it. Can he say No I don’t feel like a beating tonight…nope…Can he say I really don’t feel like making dinner or cleaning the dishes…nope. Does he give me a hard time...sometimes…is he an intellectual challenge…always…and I love him for it… Mistress Taboo

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 6:53:03 PM

joyinslavery

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Oh, this is so funny and does make me giggle. Of course the answer is NO, right? Every Domme out there - NO WAY, right? Yeah, right.

Btw, the OP asked about a "weak and spineless" male. I'm not sure why intelligence keeps getting worked in to the replies. Then again, I think I could take a guess as to why.

Funny.

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 7:05:11 PM

MzScorpio1

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No" I personally prefer someone who has a mind, and I like My subs a little naughty

MzScorpio

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 8:01:24 PM

LotusSong

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I had a spineless sub once.. I'll never forget Slave "Slinky". I loved the way he'd go down the stairs.....first his head..then his bottom..then his head..then his bottom.. :)

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 8:05:54 PM

michaelGA2

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personally, i'm tired of being a doormat, ignore and being taken advantage of...where's the fun?

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 8:17:25 PM

Invictus754

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quote:

ORIGINAL: strob
...I was wondering if there are any Dommes that like their subd weak and spinless...

Not only do I want a sub who has intelligence and thinking ability, I want one who can spell / type.

Spinless sounds like a malfunctioning washing machine, lol.

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RE: Re: "Does being a sub mean you have to be weak... - 9/20/2006 10:05:50 PM

LASub4Real

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The problem is that spineless persons have no passion. It's the mental equivalent of sex with a crash dummy. I've never met a Domme yet who didn't wish to be challenged by her sub. That's not the same thing as challenging her authority, mind you. Intelligence is sexy, "getting her" is sexy, being able to articulate your passion for her as a unique individual is damn sexy.

LAsub

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