Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: confused on slave protocal?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: confused on slave protocal? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/19/2006 7:02:28 AM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: patina

I am a lot confused on certain protocal of the slave status.  If she is the property of the Dom what about her personal items, her income,(retirement) her house, her car.  If she can be given to another Dom what happens to those things.  If she is kicked out does she keep her poessions.  If she is lent to another Dom and he disgusts her will her Master understand and rescue her.  I know and am sorry for so many questions. 
Slavery is different for different people. What you need to do is determine what it is for you before you try and find someone that shares that view. For some it means totallity in their submission. They own nothing and are thankful for what the Master gives them. If thats you then go with it. If not, then by all means make that known in any relationship you're thinking of getting into. But in the end, only you can determine the type and depth of slavery you want and you should do so before you get involved with another.

_____________________________

If you love somebody, you have to be willing to break them.

Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.

Have you slapped your slave today?

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/19/2006 7:12:22 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		It's dependent on what is negotiated between the Master/slave or Dom/sub. If you do not want to do a total asset turnover, put that as part of your negotiations. If you do, I'd say that no, you don't get the things back...but that, too, can be negotiated. You could turn them over to your Dom for management, rather than an asset turnover. But, be sure they can do it!

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/19/2006 5:13:53 PM   
charismagirrl


Posts: 297
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		patina- First off it sounds as if you were fed some misinformation by your ex Dom. Secondly, having said that you aren't a slave, but a sub, then this type of action really shouldn't apply to you. i am a slave (i finally found the right One)...i have been a sub, a bottom and a Domme. (pro and lifestyle)

This type of subject always gets me going...not just the financial aspect but the idea that so many subs or slaves who long to serve so deeply end up getting taken in by Doms who really aren't fit to wipe their feet on.

I agree totally with all that everyone has said regarding waiting until you are in a long term relationship and marriage, not only a marriage but the long term part, (sooo many woman and men in the world, vanilla included, get into quick marriages with schemers.) before you would sign anything over to another.

A good Dom/me  will have your interests at heart...they will want to help you build a nest egg should anything happen to them.If they feel that you're better with finances they may even appoint you in charge of such tasks. They won't be afraid that you'll leave if you have the means to do so, because they'll be secure in knowing that they care for your needs  (sometimes even wants) well as you serve their wants, needs and will. They'll know that in your heart of hearts that you are where you need to be.

my Daddy/Master takes care of me financially as well as emotionally and in every other conceivable way....i am beholden to him and i am His slave (and live to serve him in any way i possibly can) because He is the only One i ever chose to give myself to in this way.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/20/2006 4:11:10 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: patina

I am a lot confused on certain protocal of the slave status.  If she is the property of the Dom what about her personal items, her income,(retirement) her house, her car.  If she can be given to another Dom what happens to those things.  If she is kicked out does she keep her poessions.  If she is lent to another Dom and he disgusts her will her Master understand and rescue her.  I know and am sorry for so many questions. 

Things like that are negotiated out (er, should be) prior to embarking on a long term contractual relationship.  Don't forget that technically, slavery is illegal in the US.  There's not a court in the world that's going to say, "Oh, he's the master, he gets everything" just because he says so.  If you're married, that's something entirely different -- get an attorney involved and draw up proper pre-nups so that in the event you're left out in the cold, you're not penniless.  (Most sane dominants want to make accomodations for a slave in the event that something unfortunate like death happens.)

Now.....protocol, that's determined by the individual Master/Mistress.  I have specific protocols for dress, comportment and presentation.  Other dominants do not.  I think that's something best answered by the person you're serving (or going to serve.)

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/20/2006 4:14:27 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: peterK50

I have a lovely farm in Lexington Ky., 100+ acres of prime land in the middle of horse country. Undeveloped land goes for about $7,000 an acre & mine has fences, barns, paddocks etc., so you do the math as to it's value. I have Dom/mes all the time who want to come & "enslave" me. Gee, I wonder why? My possessions are not for someone who thinks they should have them due to their position. I may leave it to them in my will but until then, you're on your own pal.

Aw come on peter, you can keep the property...I just want to see you mucking the stalls naked with your bare hands.

See, not all dominas want the same thing LOL

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to peterK50)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/22/2006 6:49:35 AM   
LadyHugs


Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Dear peterK50, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I have to say, that I do agree with you.  I would strongly advise an Revokable Trust, to where you have yourself as Trustee.  Then you can designate who will be co-trustee, when you no longer are able to manage your affairs, to include the property.  You have the power and control of said property until your unable, such as stroke, heart attack and don't have a sound mind or be able to speak for yourself and or death.
 
As far as slavery being illegal in the USA, that is correct.  However "Indenture" is still enforceable by law.  That is why some of us do not draw up a 'slave' contract but, a contract of Indenture.  It will be held up in any court, as it is an agreement, a treaty, a bond, a contract and or a deal.  Something to be mindful of, as this was used to still 'enslave' individuals in a different manner, used in the Colonial period and to this day.
 
I do agree that everybody in negotiations regardless of dominant and or submissive, keep their finances out of the clutches of another's control.  It use to be where dominants put excess money from a slave's paycheck (when it was male dominant/female dominant) relationships; into a Trust fund/Escro account in her name.  Back in the 1970's all men took care of the women in the scene.  Not all women still have equal pay for same jobs and it was far worse in the 1970's.  Male slaves did give their Mistresses an allowance and set it up into a Trust/Escro account, as to provide for them but--they never gave up full control, unless they wanted to.  This goes for the female slaves as well--they could give a portion of their income to the dominant--it all was negotiated; never automatic and--It must be tailored to the current/future needs of both individuals.
 
There are different protocols that are out there; some are dungeon protocols, social protocols and personal/relationship protocols.  Protocols establish rules, etiquette if you will in how to behave and what is tolerated and not. 
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to peterK50)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/23/2006 3:03:31 AM   
Avrilkiller


Posts: 45
Joined: 6/17/2006
Status: offline 		i agree with pretty much everyone else, it seems. Do so at your own risk and your own comfort.
While S/He may ask that you do so, i think a responsible and well-meaning Dom will understand if you aren't ready to do this immediately or until you decide yourself.
Personally, i prefer U/us both to have (roughly) O/our own accounts and things, but i also gave Him my information in case He ever needed or wanted that money for whatever reason. But i've been in this relationship for several years and marraige is a factor, so...
Hey, whatever makes you the most comfortable and happy.

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/23/2006 4:05:43 AM   
UnvailedPurpose


Posts: 61
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		The mindset I embrace does not afford the luxury of irresponsibleness and/or the dismissing of rational thought.
Self-preservation and the continuance of zestful challenging happy and pleasurable living is the primary responsibility of each of us. Financial security plays a disproportionate but necessary roll in both self-preservation and happiness. I personally can find no rational or logical reason to relinquish or entrust my assets to another or even share the extent of...or planning for...furthering the accumulation of additional assets. My life and what I chose to do with it is my responsibility and regardless if I subject myself to the authority of another or not…I remain responsible for my assets choices conduct behavior and thinking.

(in reply to Avrilkiller)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/23/2006 7:18:47 AM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: patina

I am not a slave and probably never will be one as i'm too strong willed but a previous Dom tried to tell me this is how a slave does. This is the same one whom I got ticked off at and told him he could F--- OFF.   No man talked to me or called my mom names like he did, we were through I was leaving him.  I am now trying to find out if all he told me was true about this lifestyle, it seems it was not.  I will have to forget all I know and learn from scratch.


It sounds like you have pretty good judgement (good judgement would have been not getting in with this guy)...and handled the situation correctly by moving away. F--- off isn't the route I would take but hey I'm a Dominant the message is clear enough for the masses. "I'm pissed and I'm outta here"

Sounds like you did get some bad information that isn't with your motivation. The good news is that everyone's kink is different so no that's not how I operate. Though you will find those that will say you were wrong, didn't know your "place" or broke the rules (even before they know what YOUR rules were).
Interview, talk, learn, talk some more, learn some more THEN think about another relationship. By then you should have a better idea of what type of rules work for you, what kinks don't and the kind of person you're seeking. Females are sought after, intelligent and "together" subs will bring a Dominant running. The important part is being able to sift through the numbers to find what works for you.

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/24/2006 1:42:35 PM   
BD123


Posts: 201
Joined: 8/12/2006
Status: offline 		A slave should contribute to the household or game room, however her finicial status should be protected as any other individuals or as in marriage contracts.

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/25/2006 9:18:16 AM   
nightrosemom


Posts: 80
Joined: 4/17/2006
Status: offline 		As far as handing over all assets....i am a slave of my Master, i own nothing, i have a truck, i have a checking account, i have my money, my name is on the title to my truck, my name is on my checking account...but everything is essentially His...He controls the money we spend outside of bills and i pay the bills.  I would have it no other way, but you have to feel comfortable enough with your Master/Dom to do this...i didnt give up all possessions to Him until about 1 month ago. Now, i have heard that a deffinition of a slave means that Master comes first before all...but me and Master have both agreed that neither of us come before our daughter...or any other children we have...the deffinition of a slave or Master/Dom depends on what both parties believe.  my previous Dom said i would never be his slave because i wouldnt put him before my daughter. it just depends on how you feel, and who you ask.

As far as a slave beeing week...i have heard it said on this forum, a slave is only week if she has low self esteem...and this is true. a slave gives herself, and to do that you have to be strong....i roleplayed in the Gor lifestyle for a while and discovered very well that a slave must be strong willed to be able to handle some of what is sometimes dished out to her. 

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/25/2006 12:45:18 PM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Anyone who talks about taking your retirement or anything other than a few drops of body fluid should make you grab your purse and run.

The above might not apply in a relationship based on a decade or two but anything less than that it would be the kiss of death for me.

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/25/2006 3:02:04 PM   
truesub4u


Posts: 2949
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: marieToo

patina:

If it feels wrong, it is wrong.


Yep... this says it all. Always listen to those inner instincts.


_____________________________

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, Skill is knowing how to do it, and Virtue is doing it.

(in reply to marieToo)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/25/2006 6:22:03 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: patina

I am a lot confused on certain protocal of the slave status.


First thing to remember is that all relationships are unique.  No two will be exactly alike and the key is to find someone who wants the same things in their relationship that you do.

quote:

  If she is the property of the Dom what about her personal items, her income,(retirement) her house, her car. 


In our relationship, everything that I have now belongs to him.  However, it is structured in such a way as to protect me.  The money I earn from my job goes in a bank account in my name.  I have two different savings accounts, a retirement fund and a car in my name.  He will keep things this way to protect me in the event that something happens to him and alandra.  Each month I receive instructions on how I am to use this money and I have to account for it's use at the end of the month.

quote:

If she can be given to another Dom what happens to those things.


Given how?  Loaned out for a few hours or given away permanently?  My Lord has no desire to give either alandra or I away permanently, so it will not happen.  However, he does loan alandra out to others and one day will loan me out as well.  What happens to those things depends on what you agreed upon in the beginning of the relationship.

quote:

If she is kicked out does she keep her poessions. 


In my relationship, yes I would keep these things.  For others, it depends on what their agreement was.

quote:

 If she is lent to another Dom and he disgusts her will her Master understand and rescue her.


*g*  No, my Lord would not rescue me and in fact my disgust of the person would probably be the reason I was lent to them in the first place.  My Lord would not do anything that he thought would harm me but giving me to someone that I did not find attractive would challenge my desire to obey him. 

Knight's kyra

*edited to poor sentence structure

< Message edited by kyraofMists -- 9/25/2006 6:27:16 PM >

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to patina)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/28/2006 12:57:55 PM   
SherTenn


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/27/2006
Status: offline 		I am often amazed at slaves who talk about being 'loaned out'.
Am I gonna loan out my reference bnooks I depend on daily..?
Am I gonna loan you my car when I don't know what kind of driver you are.. or even if I do...?
Am I gonna loan $1000 to anyone, including my brother..?

So why in *hell* would I loan out my most precious possesion..?

Sher

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: confused on slave protocal? - 9/28/2006 1:23:36 PM   
gypsylee


Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

Anyone who talks about taking your retirement or anything other than a few drops of body fluid should make you grab your purse and run.



damn straight. maybe you ain't such a CrappyDom afterall

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.


(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 36
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: confused on slave protocal? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094