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RE: Another perspective - 9/25/2006 10:23:00 AM   
CrappyDom


Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		For some I guess virgins and such are fine.

For someone of my stature and experience what do I care if they have been with others and in general would prefer that over little if any experience.  The more people they have experienced they more they will realize how superior I am, how much more talented and creative I am than the others they have been with.

For those who know me and wonder if the above is sarcasm, it most certainly is not, I am just that good.

(in reply to LadyHugs)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Another perspective - 9/25/2006 10:59:00 AM   
Severian


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/12/2006
Status: offline 		Many good suggestions here. I appreciate everyone's input!

Actually, I did find out what had caused her date to go bad and it was over something I would not have done. I did not break the contact 'on the spot.' The conversation happened on her way home from the date. She had picked up some food on the way home. I needed to eat as well so it was agreed that she would call me after she finished eating. She did not call and I had enough time to assess my feelings on the matter to know that our connection was becoming more and more displeasing. I attempted to call her but she did not answer. Then I received a call from her where she did not say anything (interestingly enough by that time I had sent an e-mail - very polite - explaining how I felt I was being treated.) She never tried to explain her position.

My lifestyle preference is that of Dominant for that is what pleases me and gives me the excitement I need to please someone who's lifestyle is a compliment to my own. Above all I am still human and that means that I am open to misinterpreting what I perceive. I make errors (which in this current situation I feel I made many.) I have much to learn. I think ending this was most likely the correct thing to do but I did so for the wrong reasons.

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Another perspective - 9/25/2006 5:51:00 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		It sounds like there are better connections out there for you. I would make sure you are on the same page about seeing other people or not seeing other people in the future if you sense a connect... expectations should be reasonable on both sides...smiles

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Severian)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Another perspective - 9/25/2006 6:25:29 PM   
justheather


Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline 		If you were getting weird vibes from her before the discussion about her being out on another date, it could be that she just said that in the hopes that you would break up with her. Some people cant come out and say "Im sorry it's just not working out for me", they have to "make" the other person do the "breaking up".

I do not think exclusivity is a reasonable request at that stage of getting-to-know-you. I dont know why she could not have just said she was "out" instead of "out with another Dom". Perhaps she was trying to let you know that she was still looking around, but didnt really choose the most tactful way to express it.

I agree with Julia that it sounds like it just was not a good match. Keep your chin up.


_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to LadyHugs)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Another perspective - 9/25/2006 6:27:11 PM   
justheather


Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline 		By the way, CrappyDom, are you travelling with the touring company of Spamalot? Because I just saw it last week and the guy playing King Arthur looks JUST LIKE YOU. I'm not kidding, it was uncanny.

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
And paste me in that book you always carry.
-Billy Collins

(in reply to CrappyDom)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Another perspective - 9/26/2006 1:26:01 AM   
Pimpernell


Posts: 198
Joined: 12/10/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justheather

If you were getting weird vibes from her before the discussion about her being out on another date, it could be that she just said that in the hopes that you would break up with her. Some people cant come out and say "Im sorry it's just not working out for me", they have to "make" the other person do the "breaking up".


My last girfriend did exactly that, making the relationship so unpleasant that I would break up with her and she would be the poor victim.  Now I can't stand any form of passive-aggresive behaviour.

(in reply to justheather)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Another perspective - 9/26/2006 10:47:40 AM   
Nimkii


Posts: 67
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline 		They want to date and were not into anything serrious thats cool. Perhaps some one else will suit there needs better then I. No skin off My nose. They want something different and unique then they will stick around. It doesn't take me long to figure out who is serrious and who just desires to be a play slut.

(in reply to Pimpernell)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Another perspective - 9/27/2006 1:30:22 AM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Severian

How would you react to a potential sub telling you the reason they weren't there to take your call was because they were on a date?


Doesn't matter what I think/how I'd react. It matters what you think and you seemed pretty clear on that.

D (owner of j)

_____________________________

Possibly.

(in reply to Severian)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Another perspective - 9/27/2006 6:45:31 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		we spoke for over a month before meeting, and by the end it was multiple phone calls, emails and chat daily. Yet he didn't ask for exclusivity until after the first meet simply because neither of us could predict if there would be chemistry or not.

(in reply to LadyHugs)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Another perspective - 9/27/2006 12:11:18 PM   
LASub4Real


Posts: 169
Joined: 1/10/2005
Status: offline 		Well, previous to the Dom date disclosure you stated that you were already feeling a level of "animosity" from her. It sounds like perhaps this wasn't really going to work out regardless. That happens all the time, and you are probably the better for cutting it off when you did. Also, disclosure goes both ways. As a sub myself who chats, emails, and phone calls Dommes, I would feel that if I had someone else I was dating at the time, that I would disclose that immediately. Why? Because I'm the one who's already semi-involved with someone else so I have no problem offering that information regardless of it has been asked of me.

LAsub

(in reply to Severian)
Profile   Post #: 30
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