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RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 11:33:21 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		mmmmmmmm another contradiction?  or maybe....

first you stated...

quote:


I'd have to say that the person you are with has been pretty darn insulting to a lot of people on these boards and has doggedly attacked many people's beliefs in ways that could be considered no less than puerile(the correct spelling btw)...but then again....I could be wrong


and then you state

quote:


or that I personally feel that her behavior is even out of line.


or maybe .. since you had to say that the person he is with has been pretty darn insulting... and that you personally feel that her behavior is even out of line.... it would suggest that you find it acceptable for a person to be pretty darn insulting.

Personally... I agree with your first quote.  She has been rather insulting and condescending to alot of different people and no I don't think it is appropriate behavior.  And yes she has apologized at times and at other times she has not....

Oh and one last thing... Replace the word She with KoM.. or Me... or many many others.... I think unfortunately that we are all guilty of this from time to time.


_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 281
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 11:41:05 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I try to monitor my own behavior, learn from my mistakes, be a better person on a daily basis. I think some people are insulted by my opinions, and I try not to call names on people... I have apologized, even sent an email to one individual that continues to insult me regularly to offer an apology.

I will admit it when I feel I have done wrong. I have even done so on this thread. I just try my best on a daily basis.. and for all my arrogance and I have plenty) I am a very compassionate person that tries to make the world a better place in my own small way...

and for those who can't stand me... I am hoping to start work in about a week, so I will not be around much anymore anyways...



_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 11:47:57 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I try to monitor my own behavior....


many of us do try

"let the person free of sin cast the first stone"  I suppose it makes sense... at least there would be alot less stones being thrown.

but the truth is we cast stones and we need to remember that we cast stones at ourselves at the same time when we do.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 283
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 11:55:49 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

mmmmmmmm another contradiction?  or maybe....

first you stated...

quote:


I'd have to say that the person you are with has been pretty darn insulting to a lot of people on these boards and has doggedly attacked many people's beliefs in ways that could be considered no less than puerile(the correct spelling btw)...but then again....I could be wrong


and then you state

quote:


or that I personally feel that her behavior is even out of line.


or maybe .. since you had to say that the person he is with has been pretty darn insulting... and that you personally feel that her behavior is even out of line.... it would suggest that you find it acceptable for a person to be pretty darn insulting.

Personally... I agree with your first quote.  She has been rather insulting and condescending to alot of different people and no I don't think it is appropriate behavior.  And yes she has apologized at times and at other times she has not....

Oh and one last thing... Replace the word She with KoM.. or Me... or many many others.... I think unfortunately that we are all guilty of this from time to time.



Ahhhh but I didn't say as to whether or not I personally feel her behavior is out of line. What I said was:
quote:

I never said I had been personally insulted or that I personally feel that her behavior is even out of line.  


What I was attempting to point out is the irony that Sinergy made a comment to Scooter stating he would be horrified if someone he was with engaged in a specific behavior....and that behavior that he specified is one that could just as easily be attached to the person he IS with by others. You yourself, have just said that you find her insulting at times.

For the record, I don't find it acceptable for a person to be pretty darn insulting, although I have to admit that there are probably many here who would count me in that crowd. Sometimes it is simply their perception....and sometimes it is with my full intent. I am quite aware when I am being catty or nasty/nice....and I'm pretty sure julia is aware of those times when she is too. You are absolutely right, we are all guilty....and I am certainly not excluded in that group.

< Message edited by mistoferin -- 9/30/2006 11:58:06 AM >

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~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

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"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 284
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 11:58:50 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		One finger pointed out at someone else, three pointed back at oneself... but it is best to call attention to the matter at hand then it is to bring up everything that ever happened in the history of CM. An insult is an insult, and trying to say it is not one is not very intellectually honest....

And yes I have been intellectually dishonest in my lifetime... I can admit it, if I didn't admit when I was wrong I could never improve as a human being or a submissive...

It has been hard to bite my tongue on this one, but on the otherhand it really doesn't matter... my Daddy knows me, how I speak, how I am, what makes me tick, and what motivates me.... I have to say I am very honored he sees me as worthy of him... and since he feels I am, there must be something worthwhile about me...smiles

I am sure twicehappy's owners feel the same way, and rightfully so.

just a little sappiness,

If I have EVER insulted someone it is usually unintentional, and I apologize as that is not what motivates me in this world.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 285
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 12:01:19 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

I find it amusing the way some posters tend to stalk her from thread to thread, 


I stalk her to find out where she's hiding the candy corn.



I ate it all .. yes this was wrong of me...I apologize


"My grandmother apologized to me once.  ONCE!" 
Joe Piscopo, Johnny Dangerously

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 286
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 12:44:49 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin
Well "teetering on the brink of insanity" would be more descriptive. Oh but wait....descriptive....could that word possibly have a meaning? Speaking of insanity....what if I was insane....suicidally insane....and I called the suicide hotline and told the person who answered that I was contemplating suicide....but that person was one of those people who believes that words have no concrete meaning. So they responded to my cry for help with "Congratulations!!!" and hung up the phone. Now that would be tragic would it not? Or would it be? Maybe their definition of "tragic" is what I define as "hilarious". Then they would be laughing at my funeral. Or is it even proper to have a funeral for a porcupine who commits Hari Kari? Or would committing Hari Kari make my porcupine status null and void and turn me into a lemming? Or wait, I guess they couldn't call me a lemming unless I agreed to it. But I'd be dead. So, do you still have the right to be called only by what you self identify as even after death???? I mean after I'm dead I really won't "be" anything but dead right? Or maybe "dead" doesn't really mean "dead".

Holy Christ....if words really don't have any basic meaning....why in the Hell are we all bothering to type all of these fricking words???????? Somebody just shoot me....but wait....are we all in agreement on what "shoot" means....I mean I don't want anyone force feeding me massive amounts of cotton candy or something?
LOL Erin.
I left this thread after my 2 posts because I'm definitely unable to discuss the non meaning of things, being a relatively concrete, cut through the bullshit type myself as that's what works for me.   I mean what would I be searching for if not a submissive or slave...  Maybe a submissive Dom?

I love/hate philosophy for this very reason...  I mean is it the love of learning, or the art of bullshitting?  Are we having this conversation to shareinformation, say we are open to one another's definitions, and learn to better understand each other, or to be the who argues best?   M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 9/30/2006 12:50:35 PM >

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RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 6:25:00 PM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl


must have had rocks in his/her head.  That is ridiculous.  If that were the case, every single slave who has ever agreed to submitting to a Master should be with that Master for the rest of her life (since she only submits once)....and we all know that doesn't happen very often, now does it?


Gee, must be the rocks in my head.......

I was with both my previous Masters until they day they each died, 3 1/2 years with the first and 18 years with the second. 

_____________________________

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The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

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Profile   Post #: 288
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 6:30:39 PM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Well "teetering on the brink of insanity" would be more descriptive. Oh but wait....descriptive....could that word possibly have a meaning? Speaking of insanity....what if I was insane....suicidally insane....and I called the suicide hotline and told the person who answered that I was contemplating suicide....but that person was one of those people who believes that words have no concrete meaning. So they responded to my cry for help with "Congratulations!!!" and hung up the phone. Now that would be tragic would it not? Or would it be? Maybe their definition of "tragic" is what I define as "hilarious". Then they would be laughing at my funeral. Or is it even proper to have a funeral for a porcupine who commits Hari Kari? Or would committing Hari Kari make my porcupine status null and void and turn me into a lemming? Or wait, I guess they couldn't call me a lemming unless I agreed to it. But I'd be dead. So, do you still have the right to be called only by what you self identify as even after death???? I mean after I'm dead I really won't "be" anything but dead right? Or maybe "dead" doesn't really mean "dead".

Holy Christ....if words really don't have any basic meaning....why in the Hell are we all bothering to type all of these fricking words???????? Somebody just shoot me....but wait....are we all in agreement on what "shoot" means....I mean I don't want anyone force feeding me massive amounts of cotton candy or something?


Mistoferin, i just spit my black russian all over the screeen.
 
When you visit for Halloween the first orgasm is on me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

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Profile   Post #: 289
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 6:37:15 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

You yourself, have just said that you find her insulting at times.



What is interesting is how vaguely worded this "insulting" thing is. 

I dont recall any posts where she called somebody names, breached protocol, stridently demanded that A/anybody
else agree with her opinion.

What she has done is stated her opinion and backed it up with
factual information.

She has also politely requested that the people who disagree with her provide some sort of link or reference work which she could go read to learn more about the issue.

If you would care to provide me with an actual example where she violated D/s protocols, I would be willing to read it.  But the idea that she is "insulting" and should be put out of everybody else's misery just seems a bit weird to me.  It is like a bunch of people got together, imprisoned her in Abu Graibh or Gitmo, and then convened a Kangaroo court to try her for the high crime of "she seems insulting to me"

But that is just me, and I could be wrong.

Sinergy



_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 290
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 6:41:39 PM   
twicehappy


Posts: 2706
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Of course.. I could be wrong ... but I think not.


And with that statement i have it confirmed to me that this is not about what i said or did not say, simply that you are rankled over my debate with Sinergy.
 
I am surprised and stunned, but so be it.  

_____________________________

Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.

The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.

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Profile   Post #: 291
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 6:54:41 PM   
adaddysgirl


Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline 		Well twicehappy, you seemed to have omitted a few words before my quote (let's get it right now so there is no misunderstanding).  i said WHOEVER COINED THAT PHRASE must have had rocks in their head.  i have seen that phrase all over the place.  Are you the one who originally coined it?  If so, i stand corrected.
 
While i admire your duration of slavery, i think it is fairly evident that most slaves have not experienced this type of longevity....and that was the point i was trying to make.   As a matter of fact, due to this phrase, i almost started a thread asking slaves why they have left previous M/s relationships.  If it is so true that they only submit once, then there should be NO ACCEPTABLE REASON for leaving, should there be? 
 
Oh...they found out the 'Master' was actually a nut?   Well, didn't they take the time to find this out before they 'submitted once'.  It is still a ridiculous theory to me.  Perhaps you have done this and again, while i do find this admirable, i do not see it as the norm, so the phrase itself is moot to me.
 
Daddysgirl

_____________________________

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.

Frederick Douglas

"I am in a relationship which employs punishment because it fulfills me to do

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RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:02:57 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl
 If it is so true that they only submit once, then there should be NO ACCEPTABLE REASON for leaving, should there be? 

Maybe the Master didn't want her anymore.

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Profile   Post #: 293
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:10:01 PM   
adaddysgirl


Posts: 1093
Joined: 3/2/2004
From: Syracuse, NY
Status: offline 		That's a good point ownedgirlie.  i could see where that could be a possibility.  But my question then would be...why?  If she is the slave who fulfills all his needs in every way, shape and form, why would he want to get rid of her?  Hell, at the very least he could keep her on for servitude while he does whatever else he is doing.  So why would he not keep her in some capacity?
 
Daddysgirl

_____________________________

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence.

Frederick Douglas

"I am in a relationship which employs punishment because it fulfills me to do

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RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:14:54 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

That's a good point ownedgirlie.  i could see where that could be a possibility.  But my question then would be...why?  If she is the slave who fulfills all his needs in every way, shape and form, why would he want to get rid of her?  Hell, at the very least he could keep her on for servitude while he does whatever else he is doing.  So why would he not keep her in some capacity?
 
Daddysgirl


In the defense of the loyalty of slaves, I have seen several who post here that had masters pass away on them... I would think they are released in death, although some have trouble even then letting go (understandably), but I think that is the feeling for anyone that has lost a lifemate... my mom is widowed twice... both times left huge holes in her heart

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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Profile   Post #: 295
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:21:42 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: twicehappy

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

Of course.. I could be wrong ... but I think not.


And with that statement i have it confirmed to me that this is not about what i said or did not say, simply that you are rankled over my debate with Sinergy.
 
I am surprised and stunned, but so be it.  


you make assumptions to the meaning of my words... It just might be something else... which it is.  Of course you don't ask so what you know is only your own feelings and opinions being project at me and not hearing what I actually have said.  Your defensiveness is affecting your ability to actually listen to what is being said you make association when there is none.

You called Synergy, slave synergy.  He obviously took exception to it.  It was not exactly the most appropriate way to prove your point that how one labels another affects a person.   I use a simple phrase... and you are affected by it.. no less than how Synergy was affected by your label.  Yes your right that labels can affect a person.. in fact so can simple phrases and the words we speak.  The point is that this affect is often an assumption and a projection of our own feelings and not the feelings or opinions of the person that states the label or phrase... or just simple communication.

I suspect that there is more that a few here that is rankled... but I assure you that it is not me.  I suspect amused and intriqued at how words  are used to affect people would be closer to the way I am feeling with regards to this thread.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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Profile   Post #: 296
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:22:56 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I would agree that the death of a Master is an automatic release.
A slave may "beg" for release as well.  Although in the pure sense of slavery, the entire "begging release" thing does not make sense to me.


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Profile   Post #: 297
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:25:04 PM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

I suspect amused and intriqued at how words  are used to affect people would be closer to the way I am feeling with regards to this thread.


It's almost reached the train wreck status for me.


_____________________________

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- Albert Einstein

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Profile   Post #: 298
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:28:27 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

I suspect amused and intriqued at how words  are used to affect people would be closer to the way I am feeling with regards to this thread.


It's almost reached the train wreck status for me.



It surpassed that for me and has moved on to Hindenburg status...smiles

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 299
RE: BDSM Definitions? - 9/30/2006 7:30:39 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: adaddysgirl

That's a good point ownedgirlie.  i could see where that could be a possibility.  But my question then would be...why?  If she is the slave who fulfills all his needs in every way, shape and form, why would he want to get rid of her?  Hell, at the very least he could keep her on for servitude while he does whatever else he is doing.  So why would he not keep her in some capacity?
 
Daddysgirl

I could speculate all evening as to why a Master/Mistress may choose to not own a perfectly obedient slave anymore.  Why does anyone give up property?   Who knows what could be going on in someone's life that would cause him/her to come to such a decision?  Perhaps the owner is ill?  Perhaps the owner has issues to deal with and feels it is in the best interest of the property to not be owned anymore?  Perhaps he's a buy/trade/sell kind of owner and likes to turn around property?  Perhaps his value system has changed by some revelation and he does not wish to own a human anymore?  Perhaps she becomes ill and he can not be there through it, or simply doesn't want to? 

I state these things because it is really easy for us to sit at our computers and decide the what/why/how/where for others, when we really do not know.  In one post you emphatically stated there was "NO ACCEPTABLE REASON" (you capped this, in fact) for a slave to leave, and after one post pointing out that yes, there really is, you were able to realize that as well.  I mean no disrespect in pointing this out, and perhaps you meant for a slave to leave of her/his own accord. 

To comment on something else in your post, I do not believe anyone fulfills another person in every way, shape and form.  I believe if that occurs then said person has found perfection, which does not exist.  I think you were saying that for emphasis, but I would guess that most can not truly do this. 

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Profile   Post #: 300
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