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RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 2:40:48 PM   
MASTERRocker


Posts: 277
Joined: 9/19/2006
From: Kitchener-Waterloo, ON
Status: offline
Yes  I concur   Jasmyn is DEFINATELY a woman.....

(in reply to Jasmyn)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 2:45:03 PM   
ToGiveDivine


Posts: 650
Status: offline
duuuuuh, what's a woman?

(See, just like that I screwed up again - I can't resist a good bit of sarcasm now and again)

(in reply to Jasmyn)
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RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 3:20:39 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ToGiveDivine

duuuuuh, what's a woman?


(as my arm gently  encircles his shoulders..) "It's been a looong time.. hasn't it..."     <---clue

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to ToGiveDivine)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 6:24:30 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong
The first thing is .. if one has a chip on their shoulder regarding men- get rid of it. Domination is not a"get-even club." One does not do this by mimicking the negative traits of our male counterparts.


Well spoken.  Still, it can be really good fun to put on a "wife beater" t-shirt and smoke a cigar while doing a sissified bitch in skirts up the ass with a giant strap-on.  :)

quote:

Don't "sell yourself." If everything you do is contingent upon how much gifting you get you knock yourself down a notch (in my opinion). As long as a woman puts a price on her head.. she degrades herself for she is saying she can be bought. If a gift is given to you of a free heart.. then it's an honor.. a TRUE tribute. You have "arrived".


I take exception to this.  Sex workers are bad, why? 


quote:

Honor each other. The golden rule applies. A woman is "superior" because of her ability to be compassionate.  Don't put that quality on the back burner because you are "domme".


For me, consensual D/s has nothing to do with "superior" or "inferior".   Nor does your gender or sexuality have anything to do with your worth as a person.  I think it's a bad mistake to assume that it does.  Your D/s preference does not automatically confer any special worth or status that you haven't earned by your actions in the real world.

quote:

A woman's greatest power is her heart and mind.  (After all, we've outwitted them THIS long)


Any human being's greatest power is whatever he or she deems it to be and works hard on developing in himself or herself.

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 6:29:04 PM   
MistressKita


Posts: 14
Joined: 3/9/2005
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words taken right out of my mouth najakcharmer

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
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RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/26/2006 6:38:40 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
This is my opinion.  This is my belief.  This is what I believe.

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Najakcharmer)
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RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/27/2006 11:49:24 AM   
LASub4Real


Posts: 169
Joined: 1/10/2005
Status: offline
Wow that was really inspirational, even from a sub's point of view. A very thoughtful approach. Thank you.

LAsub

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/27/2006 8:04:53 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LASub4Real

Wow that was really inspirational, even from a sub's point of view. A very thoughtful approach. Thank you.

LAsub


You're welcome .  No charge

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to LASub4Real)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/29/2006 5:12:42 AM   
LadyEllen


Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ToGiveDivine

Guys NEVER get sex for free - it always costs something in some way.  The thing is whether the cost is worth it.  For the right person, the cost is always worth it.


I felt uneasy, reading that TGD. It seems to suggest that the sole purpose of women is to provide sex to men, and that other than for that purpose, they are irrelevant at best, and at worst an expensive inconvenience.

It also ignores that any relationship costs both sides - perhaps in different ways on each side, but it costs. In our culture (outside of bdsm), a woman who is with a man is still more or less expected to devote her life to him, giving up all her own aspirations and interests in favour of the relationship, whilst a man is expected to maintain his career, nights out and interests, as she stays at home with his children, and makes housework her hobby. He might be expected to share the income, but he doesnt lose very much by comparison with what his wife gives up.

But youre right, for both parties, in a good relationship the cost is always worth it.

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to ToGiveDivine)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/29/2006 9:14:51 AM   
MistressTexas


Posts: 425
Joined: 5/30/2006
Status: offline
I speak as a Pro (as usual :) ) and hope I offend no-one. I have personal relationships with subs, both male and female, who tribute me with nothing more than their time and servitude. A box of chocolates, my favorite flowers, or some other trinket is lovely, but not expected. However when I meet someone, who offers me nothing on a personal level, who's laundry list of wants, dont wants, likes and dislikes has relegated them to the ranks of searching fr a pro, then yes. That sub will pay for my time and skill level. I don't have a chip on my shoulder towards men, other than *heaven forbid* I actually have to be sexually attracted to a man to have a relationship with him. I work a very vanilla job as well, and I work hard at it. I work to pay my bills, and even as a Pro, I am selective in who I session with.
I beleive LotusSong makes a graceful and wise post. Most of her posts are in the same vein, and I respect her for that. Jasmyn, I think you jumped right over the top in reading "between the lines" of LS's post. I respect your opinion, but I think you need to go back and read your own post.. think about how it comes off.
I forget who said this (sorry), but the statement "good pro's suffer along with the rest, one bad pro gets 100x more press than all the good ones" is so very true. I appreciate the statement, as I've been trying to figure out how to phrase it for quite some time now. I apoligize for my disjointed and somewhat rambling post.. nightshift tires me out.

(in reply to LadyEllen)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Advice to a Domme - 9/30/2006 7:14:00 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressTexas

I forget who said this (sorry), but the statement "good pro's suffer along with the rest, one bad pro gets 100x more press than all the good ones"


I think I said that in one of my posts :)

(in reply to MistressTexas)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Advice to a Domme - 10/1/2006 2:59:40 AM   
mons


Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline
greetings loutsong
 
that was so well said. i have always carried myself with what is in me. i am kind gentle person i wil not let anyone take that from me. i can not be a sadist domme if i am not into that i have some of it but not like some of the males want it. i had said in many chat rooms and on here. if you can not control yourself you can not control anyone at all. we as woman have the strenght to hold many lives in our hands. when i say i am a gentle domme with a strict side i mean it i do walk the walk and talk the tlak . yes i seen post that were just horrible and i do write what i think on it but i try not to isult my writing is a mess lol but i write at it and as many can see it is getting better then before. i am a self taught woman i learn to paint and i love life i love men oh yes my sexual feeling towards black me is different but i respect them. i learned and will always learn from some of you here on the cm boards .
 
your very right to write this my mother who was from the south tuaght me to be a lady at all times and this message she give me is still with me i am a lady and no one will change it. i hope all listen to this wonderful message and take it to heart into you heart. i did not think or know that some thougth dommes were man hater i am shock. not a man hater i love them the shape of many all have something that is nice and sexy bald or long hair short ot tall they have something i want
 
great post lotus
 
mons

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Advice to a Domme - 10/1/2006 5:42:35 AM   
DivaDuchess


Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline
Hmmm ... I'm not a Pro Domme, so don't charge for my training.  I simply train.  I've done auctions at the end of training.  The slave sets her price and I try to get as close to it as I can.  I've actually gotten MORE once.  Do I take the cash?  Nope ... it goes in a 5 year locked CD for the slave.  She earned it, in spades.  She now has pride in herself, which is the point all along.




_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to Jasmyn)
Profile   Post #: 33
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