Where did you learn what you know?

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Where did you learn what you know?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Where did you learn what you know?

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 6:52:49 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

Where did you learn what you know? From the feet of a single mentor? A book or two? What formed you?

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 6:54:35 AM

mstrjx

Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline

Books and magazines, demonstrations, jumping in.

In roughly that order. With a lot of ongoing reading over the years.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:00:36 AM

Tikkiee

Posts: 1099
Joined: 4/6/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Where did you learn what you know? From the feet of a single mentor? A book or two? What formed you?

Interesting question. I thought that I knew pretty much about who and what I was and am; only recently have I discovered that there is alot more to me than what I see. So, right now, I am learning from a man who is helping me to discover that.
As to what formed me. My past formed me, my present is molding me, and I can only pray that the future cements it into a stability that I can be comfortable with.

/sigh

edited again because I can not type today.

< Message edited by Tikkiee -- 10/5/2006 7:01:50 AM >

_____________________________

~~@ cass @~~

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:02:17 AM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrjx

Books and magazines, demonstrations, jumping in.

In roughly that order. With a lot of ongoing reading over the years.

Jeff

Any specific author or speaker where you said "yeah.. THAT's my style"?
I read Mistress Steele (the link I posted here about Submissive Frenzies is from her site if anyone wants to peruse her further) and devoured the information as it just felt "right" for me. The first book I read was The Loving Dominant. When I saw that silly movie Exit to Eden.. and saw how Delaney worked with the slave in his first spanking scene.. THAT is the persona that most closely matches mine. Controlled Dominance without being burly about it :)

Techniques I learned from watching demos and from acquaintances.

(in reply to mstrjx)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:06:01 AM

becca333

Posts: 1050
Joined: 4/11/2006
Status: offline

Reading, imagination, more reading, several wonderful Doms, discussions with some very kind and helpful friends and extensive research on the net (Yes, it's all work, work, work - but I'm dedicated.)

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:16:10 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

I have read a little, talked to a lot of people, and the dominants in my life taught me the most.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:17:06 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

Several things.

Lot of reading and lots of trail and error with a partner or two.

Then we moved to NYC and we joined clubs, went to munches, and I found a few mentors to teach me things. I don't believe in having only one mentor, I think that is foolish. Each person has different experiences and skills to share.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:55:31 AM

BrutalAntipathy

Posts: 412
Joined: 7/8/2005
Status: offline

I started out with a girl ( Yes, girl, get over it! ) a couple of years older than me when I was a kid. Neither of us really had a clue what we were doing, but despite claims to the contrary concerning unmentored learning, nobody got injured. A few years later I joined a Gorean group, which lasted right up until I started asking questions about why their practices ignored so much of the philosophy of the novels. I also read a lot of related material, and was disgusted at how fluff bunny it all was. Since that time, I have sought advice on techniques when I felt that the use of certain items could be dangerous if not used correctly. Canes are a good example of this. I found 6 people that used canes well, and asked their advice. When I found that all of their answers and suggestions matched, I began practicing on my then current slave at a dungeon that 2 of the 6 frequented so that I could put their suggestions into supervised practice. Other than for learning, I have no use for public " play" and
" scenes ". After all, I am not an actor.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 7:55:32 AM

MasterC46910

Posts: 108
Joined: 4/17/2006
Status: offline

Starting with a formal group, experience, reading, interaction with otheres, still learning, growing and evolving.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:03:59 AM

Iskander

Posts: 264
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline

The physical side of bdsm, the ropework, whipping, etc... I learnt from reading, watching, talking to others and practice...

The mental side of dominance has just always been there, from about 10yo I have been involved in training german shepherds, I have had cats that actually do what they are told, I gave a friend of mine a kitten once, he wont let anyone touch him without ripping their arm off, (except the friend that I gave him to, she loves the critter), yet to this day I can pick him up, cradle him upside down like a baby and tickle his belly... (anyone else dies

)
I have helped turn 'problem kids' into normal well adjusted kids... I didn't have to learn that, it just is, and I can not explain what I do, or how I do it... Heck for a long time I didn't even think of it as dominance, but being able to see things from other beings perspectives... (know thy enemy, walk a mile in their shoes... that kind of thing)

Iskander...

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:06:56 AM

CrappyDom

Posts: 1883
Joined: 4/11/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

I learned from my mistakes of which there have been many which is why I now know so much.

(in reply to Iskander)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:10:32 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Iskander

...I have had cats that actually do what they are told...

heh. it's true. i generally hate cats

but His cat is actually quite likeable.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to Iskander)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:15:39 AM

deltadawn

Posts: 224
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Where did you learn what you know? From the feet of a single mentor? A book or two? What formed you?

I first learned through books and research. Later from attending munches, dungeons. Experimenting, exploring. It was my Master who formed me.

dawn

_____________________________

Beneath his wings, I can fly.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:47:47 AM

Iskander

Posts: 264
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

I learned from my mistakes of which there have been many which is why I now know so much.

When I grow up I wanna be just like CrappyDom....

Iskander...

(in reply to CrappyDom)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 8:52:26 AM

DivaDuchess

Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline

I have always been very dominant. All my life. Then I read an article or two that showed me that I'm not alone and that I'm not as weird as vanilla folks around me tend to think I am *lol*. From there ... I just kinda ran with it. Mostly instince and a deep caring for those around me to find who they are inside and out. So ... now I train and am in the process of seeking a slave for our own home.

Hope that helps with your question.

_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to Iskander)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 9:06:08 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

A movie, books (fiction and nonfiction), a lot from a specific person, demonstations, hands-on, workshops, my current set of gurus that include Masters and slaves.

The beginnings of that was mostly figuring out what I was NOT. It wasn't until I started reaching out to the national community that I really figured out who/what I am.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 9:09:11 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

I learned form a Mentor and a lot of hands on experience. My mentor introduced me to some very experienced submissives. I learned a lot from them. I keep a open mind and learn from these forums and other sites. Just when you thing you know it all something new pops up.

(in reply to DivaDuchess)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 9:31:36 AM

Daddysredhead

Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline

I am still learning, but it started from my current Master, books (The New Bottoming Book, The Loving Dominant, Beauty and Submission), the boards, other people in the lifestyle - by talking to them or watching them at the dungeon.

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut

(in reply to Dnomyar)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 9:47:15 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Iskander

quote:

ORIGINAL: CrappyDom

I learned from my mistakes of which there have been many which is why I now know so much.

When I grow up I wanna be just like CrappyDom....

Iskander...

You already are. if ya know what i mean

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to Iskander)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: Where did you learn what you know? - 10/5/2006 9:57:28 AM

Chatt22nooga

Posts: 44
Joined: 9/25/2006
Status: offline

The world has not gone mad...the people in it have....the world will be here until the sun burns out and the dark and cold will bring about another species here...to the gajee,goes the task of telling the future...MasterDECKER esq....

(in reply to gypsylee)

Profile

Post #: 20