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RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 1:24:39 AM   
meatcleaver


Posts: 9030
Joined: 3/13/2006
Status: offline 		If you can do without someone for a year, you can do without them for life.

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 1:59:02 AM   
adommeforu


Posts: 847
Status: offline 		May I ask what you mean by "do without"?

(in reply to meatcleaver)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 2:01:23 AM   
ShyMistress


Posts: 173
Joined: 6/21/2006
From: your sexiest nightmare ;)
Status: offline 		I probably am way off, but here is My take...

He could have sold her at her own request. It may have been that she wished to experience something as a slave or submissive that He was not willing to provide, so they arranged her absence for a year.

At their reunion, His request of a "vacation" would then simply be (in My opinion) a way to regain the trust between them, and to ascertain that He was still what she wished for a dominant, and that she was still His ideal for a submissive/slave.

Personally My slaves are with Me or not, once I see a need to have them removed from My presence or House they stay gone.

_____________________________

"Everyone is a potential naked slave to You once You become a Trainer." -Anne Rice-

~*~ Proud Owner of kajiradream, patiently awaiting her return Home ~*~


(in reply to Rumtiger)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 3:25:15 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		I'm giving my Fred Mertz, puzzled look, as I listen to Lucy splain it to Ricky.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 4:28:53 AM   
MasterC46910


Posts: 108
Joined: 4/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Devilslilsister

Um.. i bet he doesnt think i could take a time out, but i know i could.  Not to long ago, it was pretty much a "time out" with no words being said about it.  It literally crushed me - but who the hell wants to stay down for long?  i managed the "time out" by simply changing my thinking around, changing my focus, and getting myself involved in other things.  I also put on my old "i couldnt give a flying fuck over a rolling donut" attitude and well that always helps = )

We um sorta just took another time out, forced by me.  i got hurt by something and refused to speak to him.  Effectively it was a time out with no words said (again lol)  Now while i forced it for my own personal reasons - it was difficult.  Takes alot of energy as i also had to put on my "i dont care clothes" . 

If it were to happen for a year?  i would distance myself so far from him and fall so deep into my hole of not giving two wits that i dunno if after the year i could go back to being me.  It'd take a massive toll on me that he would have to take ages to heal.  Of course knowing him, he would dig until he found me and could make it better.

And of course, if he sold me - the first thing i'd do when i saw him was nail hiim as hard in the nuts as i could.  Either that or i'd bid my time until i could catch hiim vulnerable and then nail him some other painful way.  JUST for being an asshole and selling me.    Cos that would seriously piss me off.  Though i doubt if he sold me, that it would take me a year to extract myself from whatever situation and find him where ever he was TOO nail in him the nuts. 





Huh...Does the mean he will not be returning my deposit?

(in reply to Devilslilsister)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 7:42:01 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Ok lol for those of you confused on the story line, jonathon (master) feels in the first book that he is leaning towards wanting to do vanilla things with carrie (slave) and finds himself unable to train her properly so decides to sell her at auction. If i remember rightly the organisation she is put up for auction with only gives a 12 month contract on slaves and from then it is up to slave and master if they wish the contract to last any longer.
When carrie goes with her new master jonathon has written a letter requesting she meet up with him after the 12 month is up, hence the meeting at the cafe in avignon. From there they hold a vanilla relationship for most of the book with bdsm stories from their past twelve months in. She is now free and he wishes to claim her again but the terms of her submission to him now would be difficult for her as explained by reasons in the book which i wont go into.
 
Hope that clears it up a little for tose of you who didnt get it lol.
 
Rumtiger - why is it fcked up to sell a slave if she consents to it?
 
 
 

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to Rumtiger)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 8:01:30 AM   
charismagirrl


Posts: 297
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline 		Sounds like an interesting read.

i lived a life of "time in" /"time out" for years and it drove me nuts. Ultimately i had no respect for the dom and was really controlling things when we were on a"time in"...it was way ugly.

my Daddy is naturally who he is, and i am naturally who i am. The concept of time out has never occured. It would almost be like asking a cat if it wanted to take time out and be a dog. Impossible.

That being said i like the way LA put things, my relationship seems to fall into that vein. We aren't high protocol, we do vanilla things together but he's always my Daddy & i'm always His slave.


_____________________________

For today i won't say but...
For today i wont say just...
For today i will simply obey....
For today i will trust that You are right...
For always i will be your imperfect slave

http://www.mycollarspace.com

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 8:22:11 AM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		First, don't try to make logistical sense out of erotic fiction.  It's not reality.
 
Second, reality dictates that there is a difference between a relationship dynamic (ie: control) and its manifestation in structure (ie: rules, obligations, chores, etc.).  From a personal point of view, I do not believe that I could ever (and I do not use the term "ever" lightly) take a "time out" from the relationship dynamic (ie: I could not be "not in control).  Still, I believe that in the process of exerting control, a Dominant (me for example :) ) may decide to set aside structure for sound reason (an example would be illness as has been previously mentioned). 
 
We have to remember that control can exist at all times, in all places, even if unexercised at that particular moment.  Yet there are realistic limitations as to how that control can be manifested in structure (ie: try ordering your girl to lift the ten ton boulder in your backyard and see if your control has limitations).  Those limitations may be permanent (as is the case with the boulder), or temporary (as is the case with illness).  Part of being in control (in my opinion) means knowing knowing the difference between the two, having realistic expecations, and being able to adapt to the ever changing conditions of life.
 
My humble (alright, no snickering) two cents.
 
John

< Message edited by Rover -- 10/11/2006 8:23:25 AM >

(in reply to charismagirrl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 9:45:46 AM   
becca333


Posts: 1050
Joined: 4/11/2006
Status: offline 		Real life is time out.  When we're together we don't waste a precious moment.

But really, how do you take time out from what you are?  You can stop doing certain things, but it doesn't change who you are on the inside.

(in reply to charismagirrl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 11:37:18 AM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ShyMistress

Personally My slaves are with Me or not, once I see a need to have them removed from My presence or House they stay gone.



Hello A/all,

While I dont do slaves, I have to agree with this.

Once I am done, I am done and I stay done.  I walk away or help them pack.

Just me, could be wrong, but there you go.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to ShyMistress)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 2:30:36 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		When I first read the OP, my immediate reaction was that no, I could not stop being who I am and that in order to take a time out in my current relationship I would have to stop being who I am.
 
However, my impression of the scenario presented is that it is not a current ongoing relationship but a couple who is deciding to get back together after not having a relationship for a year. In that instance, if something were to happen and my Lord and I did not have a relationship for a significant period of time and then decided to reunite, then I would not expect the relationship to just pick up where we left off. I would expect it to begin much like we started out the first time. We started out interacting as equals more or less and he didn’t have any authority in my life. His authority gradually grew over a period of months until I made the decision to give him all the authority in my life.

I also think that in some relationships, the protocols and kink can mask or cover up problems that exist either within the relationship or with a person. They can also be used in unhealthy ways to deal with emotions, security and personal issues.

An example is when SM or play is used as a stress reliever or as an outlet to express negative emotions. That is not necessarily an unhealthy way to use play as long as you also have the skills to manage these emotions in other ways as well. If play is the person’s only outlet for releasing this stress it could become an unhealthy situation for them. In my opinion, taking a "time out" on the kink and focusing on learning how to manage these emotions in other ways could be very healthy for the person and the relationship.

Just a different perspective on reasons to take a time out.

Knight's kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 3:32:31 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		He leases her out for one year. After the lease is up, he retrieves her but says that instead of going back into full M/s mode, they ought to go on vacation like normal people first. Makes sense to me. After a year of not seeing each other, they might discover they no longer are compatible.

It's a work of fiction ffs.

(in reply to Rumtiger)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 4:15:57 PM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		It's a work of fiction ffs.

fiction often reflects fact and vice versa.


_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 5:17:49 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

It's a work of fiction ffs.

fiction often reflects fact and vice versa.



So what you are saying is the factual experience of the world and the US with Monkeyboy at the helm is a reflection of an existential nightmare fiction work about the chimpanzees taking over the zoo and attacking the zebras who they suspect of having WMDs?

Where is my thorazine drip when I need it.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 5:25:48 PM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		I may be wrong, but isn't there another board to take your obsession with leftist politics?  If I'm not mistaken, there are even boards specifically for such fascinations.
 
Seriously, everything in life is not political, and everything political is not appropriate on lifestyle boards.
 
John

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 5:27:42 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

I may be wrong, but isn't there another board to take your obsession with leftist politics?  If I'm not mistaken, there are even boards specifically for such fascinations.
 
Seriously, everything in life is not political, and everything political is not appropriate on lifestyle boards.
 
John


I have no objection to you posting on them.

Sinergy

_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 5:50:12 PM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		Then you won't mind if I object to you incessantly bringing politics here to these lifestyle oriented boards.  :) 
 
Glad we solved that.
 
John

(in reply to Sinergy)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 5:57:10 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		People are free to write whatever they like within the tos. It seems like others would not be so concerned about posts they do not appreciate and pass them by instead of trying to dom anothers writing... personally I do not take well to others telling me how I should write a post as long as I am within the tos.

Perhaps you would be better served to pay attention to your own posts than to try to guide and direct others on the content of theirs... just an observation

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 6:05:57 PM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		No offense, julia, but I may have the impression that this board is for lifestyle oriented subjects from the following excerpts of the Moderator's instructions.
 
The opening line states:

"As the description for this section states, this is a forum for the open discussion of topics pertaining to BDSM and related subjects."

Further elaboration follows:

"General BDSM - Genuine and more serious discussion of BDSM. This is NOT a garbage pail or a catch all forum"
 
"Off Topic Discussion - This is where you can discuss politics, religion, astrology, cooking or anything else non BDSM related"

I allowed for the fact that I may have been wrong (perhaps you noticed that in my post).  I'm also prepared to be enlightened as to your interpretation of the forum instructions as posted above.
 
John

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Time out - 10/11/2006 6:37:09 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		Yup seems pretty straight forward interpretation to me...  but then... I could be wrong... But then I think not.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 40
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