RE: lying about yr age (Full Version)

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agirl -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 6:38:59 AM)

Hmmm, I don't have a huge problem with people lying about all sorts of things, depending on the circumstances. Sometimes the reason for the lie can be quite poignant.

Maybe you could take something from the fact that she felt comfortable enough to be honest with you, after being in your company, about something that mattered enough to her to lie in the first place.

Sometimes the things that people lie about can seem daft if it's something that we'd have no angst about being frank over.

agirl




becca333 -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 6:49:40 AM)

Ok, ok I'll 'fess up.  I'm not  49, slightly saggy and middle aged.  I'm actually 24 and totally gorgeous, but I thought if I lied about my age I'd have a better chance of meeting people. 



WhipTheHip -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:34:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied
I met someone who did not disclose his real age until a few weeks after we met.  Needless to say, it was one of many lies.

 
I met someone who did disclose their real age right away.  Needless to say, it was the only thing they were honest about.
 
Ted Bundy was honest about his age.   Hence, all people who are honest about their age are probably serial killers. 
 
Some people say, "If someone lies to me about one thing, I never fully trust them again."
 
Personally.  I certainly would never want to have anything to do with such a judgmental,
self-righteous, hypocrite.   
 
Trust is something earned over time.  People who demand trust are nortoriously untrustworthy.   
But some people just have a problem trusting others, and are so hypercritical and judgmental
that if you ever disappoint them no matter how hard you try, they will never trust you again.  Who
wants such a person in their life? 
 
I am a trusting person.  I tend to give people trust before it is earned.  And I never
ask others trust me.  I don't feel insulted when someone I know asks me to
substantiate some claim.   In fact, I don't like putting people in a position where
they have to trust me because I think that is unfair to them and imposing.   I am
human.  I often succeed where others fail, but I don't offer guarantees.  I make
no promises.   Sometimes I mispeak.   Sometimes I employ hyberbole. 
Sometimes I speak figuratively.   I rarely deliberately tell lies.  But sometimes I
do.  I am fairly open about my shortcomings and my deficits.  People who know
me tell me I am too open and honest, but that is my nature. 
 
I certainly want to be with a partner who is understanding, accepting, forgiving,
and who does not sweat the small stuff.  I have always tried my best to be a
genuinely good person.  I have always tried my best to follow my conscience
and not my emotions or baser instincts.  Some people think I'm a saint. 
 
I'm no saint, far from it.  But I try harder than anyone I have ever met to be
a saint.   I am sexual sadist, and have all kinds of sexual fantasies, and
try to find a consensual partner.  I am not controlled by sexual desires, but
by my beliefs and principles.  Moreover, I try my best to always treat all
others how I would want to be treated if I were in their place. I am pretty
sincere.  I don't pull punches.  I am not a game player.   
 



WhipTheHip -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:43:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
On one hand age is just a number so does it realy matter.
On the other hand thiugh if they are lying about their age what else ar they lying about.

 
If they lie about their age, they could be a serial killer or an ax murderer. You never know.
And if they tell the truth about their age, you can believe everything else they say.    You
just got to love all these people who never tell a lie, and are absolutely always honest
about everything no matter what the circumstances.



WhipTheHip -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:51:27 AM)

quote:
 During the intial telephone conversation, each one admitted to Me that he was not the age he had in his profile.  One was actually 55 and the other 57.  In both cases, they said they had problems with Dommes not wanting a sub over 50, so they put 50 in their profile. 

It's one thing to just be a little vain, but, my problem with that is, they are disrespecting that person, because it's their right to want someone a certain age, and it's dishonest and manipulative to lie to get what you want.  Oh I know I know it happens in the world all the time...doesn't make it right.  

 
It seems to me these guys were honest with you, and gave the information you wanted before the transaction was complete.  Collarme.com does not give users the option of not giving out their age.  No one is obligated to tell a stranger or the world any personal information about themselves.   

 



MyNameisMaam -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:52:10 AM)

laughing about krista's reply...that should be on a t-shirt!



WhipTheHip -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 8:08:56 AM)

> As my Master and I have discussed and agreed, less than 100% honesty is 100%
> dishonesty.   Lies by omission or deception are still lies.
 
And here all this time I thought nothing in this world was 100% pure.  I thought the
world was just different shades of grey.  Now, I learn that parts of the world are
really just black and white.   This is the most saintly web site I have ever been on.
I feel humbled and priviledged to be in the company of such righteous, and such
exceptionally honest people.

I admit to telling lies.  I never ask others to trust me.  Nor do I ever put others
who don't trust me in a position where they need to trust me.  I have no
problem proving what I what I say.  I don't feel slighted when people who
don't know me don't trust me.   I believe actions and deeds speak louder
the words.  Don't trust me.  I do not feel slighted when strangers ask me
to verify my claims.




SexyRed -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 8:31:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Bluebird

To the OP - From what I read, you spoke to this woman a few times to hook up for a no strings attached 3-some, and you are shocked that she didn't give you all the details of her life?  I personally don't lie about my age, but if I was just "hooking up" with strangers, I can think of plenty of things I wouldn't share.  I think you are making far too much of it.  I would be more concerned if she left out other details that might be more pertinent, such as STDs, personality disorders, etc.  If you are ok with that stuff, then I wouldn't sweat the age thing. 


Thanks, you said what I was feeling much better than I would. I find the OP's thread ludicrous. Your profile states you are seeking like minded women to join you and your partner for NSA. You say nothing about age. Then you quickly jump into it with her and then are upset that she is somewhat older.

Give me a freaking break. And for all the people who are so shocked that people lie online, believe me, there are far worse things to lie about than a few years in age. I know women who have men lie to them about having entire families.




Morrigel -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 8:48:44 AM)

Just as an aside, it seems to me that shaving a few years off her age in a profile is far less remarkable and far less telling than confessing the truth to you afterward.  Being afraid that someone will judge and reject you for a superficial reason is normal.  If she had not felt the desire to connect more honestly and deeply, she would not have confessed the truth.

After all--it's not as if you found out her real age by looking at her driver's license.  You didn't catch her in a lie--she confessed it openly.

*shrug*  To me that means far more than the minor transgression committed when I was an unknown stranger.  I'm well aware that this society is cruel and unforgiving to older women who still have sexual needs and want to be recognized as sexual beings.  I understand completely why someone would want to reduce the chance of being rejected before someone even met or spoke to her.  But...that's just me.

--M



rubyleu -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:00:32 AM)

yup.. i understand you all.. hell, who knows, i might take off a few yrs too when im 50.. as for my profile seeking NSA, its this site.. i have a few other profiles and that woman was met on another one. in fact, she contacted my Master at first and i took the time to write her back because He didnt have the time. in His profile (where she contacted Him), it stated He is seeking subs/slaves to join us. He then told her that if we were to keep meeting, she would become His sub. with that in mind, that would be my sister sub. So aint it kinda normal to feel a pissed off with someone not being honest with you, especially her knowing that she was asked for a commitment in the long run.
sure i appreciate she confessed.. but what else is she gonna bullshit me about to get her way, (if she does come around again) then confess after she gets what she wants. yeah, maybe i got a problem trusting ppl.. i just dont get why she didnt say it before.
maybe its hard for some folks to understand, kinda like you-had-to-be-there situation. shit... i never thought this post would grow this big. i think its great though, all these different kinds of opinions, no one taking it personally, some making jokes, some being sarcastic.. amazing. what an experience im having. i should do this more often..
THANKS EVERYONE!!!



rubyleu -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:08:37 AM)

Sexyred, you dont get it. im not upset she is older. im upset she didnt tell us the truth. with that in mind, im gonna change my profile and make sure women who contact us dont have to bullshit. or at least if they bullshit in their profiles, they dont have to be afraid of rejection.
what you dont understand either is... say i was one of those narrow minded ppl that want to play with partners in this and that age range. narrow minded is a bit harsh, cos its no one's business of anyone's choice, but i say narrow-minded because in time, ive realized age has nothing to do with having a great time. in fact, the older you are, the more experienced most ppl are, and more skillful.. but say i was one of those ppl that seek partners between 30-45. but i forgot to put it in my profile. but im a naive dumbass and dont know that ppl bullshit about their age and believe everyone...
personally, i would feel disrespectful to someone after fucking them and admitting them something. thats my opinion... its not the age, again i say it, its not the age.. NOT THE AGE.. its the bullshitting.
and now that i think of it, not that i caught her bullshitting a few times, but i did find some of her excuses weird in these past weeks, why she didnt reply to my emails, or IM's online.. who knows how much bullshit there can be. there are good liars out there. but there are also some ppl that are insecure in their age, but still.. i value honesty, openess, upfrontness..



Aileen68 -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:12:39 AM)

If she has you questioning things so much, maybe it's time to tell her thanks but no thanks.  Seems like you'll always be looking for things with her.  Time to move on and continue looking for someone else.



Nimkii -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:21:45 AM)

You lie about your age what else are ya willing to lie about. Next question



agirl -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:28:09 AM)

I don't find it that hard to understand, no.

I don't find it hard to understand why people aren't 100% honest at all. I don't find it hard to understand that people will lie about the strangest things.

Maybe you are feeling disrespected but that doesn't actually mean that disrespect was the intent...and until you ask, you'll not know.

agirl  



Morrigel -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 9:35:21 AM)

To be honest, it seems like this thread is also touching on the theme seen in a lot of other threads, which has to do with people being "real".  I think many people are uncomfortable and insecure with the freedom that others have to misrepresent themselves on the Internet in general.

I suppose the real question here is not just about honesty, but about wanting to be with someone who is strong and secure within themselves.  By lying about your age, you reveal weakness:  you are not comfortable with who you really are, and you do not trust others to embrace and affirm you if you tell the truth.

Being suspicious and uncomfortable with such a person is not entirely irrational.  It's not just a question about whether they are lying to you, at any given moment--people who are uncomfortable/unhappy with themselves have a tendency to lie to themselves, which can make them especially dangerous to others.  And after all, what inspires less trust than being distrusted?  She didn't trust you to be a good enough or deep enough human being to accept her real age, at least at first--that could be irksome/insulting at some level.

-M



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 12:23:20 PM)

I'm the big 4 0, and content with the woman I've become.
I have it on profile, and tell the truth when asked.   I know I look much younger, and still there is no reason to be dishonest about it.   Do I think it's the end of the world when someone shaves a couple of years off, no...  I do get annoyed when they shave 5-10years off though, and men DO IT ALL THE TIME believe me.   M  



WhipTheHip -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 5:45:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nimkii
You lie about your age what else are ya willing to lie about. 
 
I swear to God, every time I have ever run into a female who has
lied about her age, it always turns out she is a secret agent for
some foreign enemy government, or she is the head of a Columbian
drug cartel, or a psycho serial killer or one of bin Ladin's daughters.
Females who lied about their age also have to the nerve to lie about
how much money they have in the bank, and how much money they
really pull down each year.  Anyone who lies about their age is
obviously a sociopath who can't be trusted.. And the converse is
true, people who are honest about their age will never hurt you
or betray your trust.  Take my word for it.



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:52:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubyleu

yup.. i understand you all.. hell, who knows, i might take off a few yrs too when im 50.. as for my profile seeking NSA, its this site.. i have a few other profiles and that woman was met on another one. in fact, she contacted my Master at first and i took the time to write her back because He didnt have the time. in His profile (where she contacted Him), it stated He is seeking subs/slaves to join us. He then told her that if we were to keep meeting, she would become His sub. with that in mind, that would be my sister sub. So aint it kinda normal to feel a pissed off with someone not being honest with you, especially her knowing that she was asked for a commitment in the long run.
sure i appreciate she confessed.. but what else is she gonna bullshit me about to get her way, (if she does come around again) then confess after she gets what she wants. yeah, maybe i got a problem trusting ppl.. i just dont get why she didnt say it before.
maybe its hard for some folks to understand, kinda like you-had-to-be-there situation. shit... i never thought this post would grow this big. i think its great though, all these different kinds of opinions, no one taking it personally, some making jokes, some being sarcastic.. amazing. what an experience im having. i should do this more often..
THANKS EVERYONE!!!
Grin...actually I was going to ask you how you think you will feel when you too are 50, but you beat me to the draw..I was pleased to note that you know that there is a possibility that at 50 + you may be tempted to lie as well..we are human we all make mistakes, I guess it simply comes down to how high you feel the transgression is and what you wish to do about it. As someone stated she was forthcoming with the info rather than being caught in the lie..but also it was also after the fact, desperation on her part...probably...desperation attractive to any one ..NO..which is what I think may be the crux of your actual distaste...Tempting



SirStephan55 -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 7:59:49 PM)

Neither me nor my slave ever lie about our age.



DesireDeeva -> RE: lying about yr age (10/15/2006 8:25:18 PM)

Lying about ur age???? what's next...lying about ur height,weight & skin color? lol...then u hafta tell another lie 2 cover the 1st 1...some people should learn 2 just "keep it real"...



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