Jealousy

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Jealousy

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Off the Grid >> Jealousy

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Jealousy - 10/14/2006 8:15:06 AM

windy135

Posts: 437
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline

Has anyone ever acted jealous (like that girl/guy they never wanted to act like) and then felt like a complete idiot afterward? There was nothing to be jealous of, your imagination got the best of you. How did you get over it? I don't even know how to approach my boyfriend/Dom. I don't want to be that girl.

Kind of a boring question but I was hoping someone could give me some pointers on how approach my Dominate boy friend (he doesn't know I got as jealous as I did) and how could I control such feelings in the future.

Thank you,
Wendy*

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Jealousy - 10/14/2006 8:24:30 AM

KenDckey

Posts: 4121
Joined: 5/31/2006
Status: offline

Feelings are normal. It is the way we choose to act upon those feelings that is important. I don't think I have a jealous bone in my body. I caught my ex with a guy. I just told him that when he was through he could leave and cloed the door. She was pissed cause he left right then and didn't get off. LOL He never came back either. LOL that kept her pissed even more. Action - Be polite Reaction - she didn't get what she wanted and tortured herself far more than I could.

(in reply to windy135)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Jealousy - 10/14/2006 9:41:48 AM

Kalira

Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: windy135

Has anyone ever acted jealous (like that girl/guy they never wanted to act like) and then felt like a complete idiot afterward? There was nothing to be jealous of, your imagination got the best of you. How did you get over it? I don't even know how to approach my boyfriend/Dom. I don't want to be that girl.

Kind of a boring question but I was hoping someone could give me some pointers on how approach my Dominate boy friend (he doesn't know I got as jealous as I did) and how could I control such feelings in the future.

Thank you,
Wendy*

Jealousy is a natural emotion; and there is nothing wrong with feeling it. What matter is HOW you handle it. If it is handled badly, the relationship will suffer; if it is handled honestly and openly, chances are it will strengthen the relationship.

Your best bet is to tell him how you felt, why you felt that way and then go from there. Be honest and open about it.

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to windy135)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Jealousy - 10/14/2006 10:03:05 AM

SlaveAkasha

Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline

I admit I get jealous sometimes also, so I know how you feel. It's normal to feel that way and there is nothing wrong with it. I agree with others, it's all in how you handle it. It's when jealousy gets ugly and out of hand it's a problem for a relationship. I would just calmly talk to your Sir about why you were jealous, be open with him.

I think a little jealousy is healthy, and can even help a relationship. It makes me feel sort of good when someone I am with feels that way. It might do the same for your Sir, he might actually feel flattered by it.

Masters Akasha

_____________________________

Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry shit continues just shoot me now please.
~ Tank Girl

www.peta.org
www.goveg.com

(in reply to windy135)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Jealousy - 10/14/2006 11:40:13 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

Jealousy, like so many other emotions, is based in fear. And, fear is often the result of an over-active imagination. How many times have we sat and been afraid of what MIGHT happen? I know I have. You've admitted your feelings...that's a big step in getting through it. Talk with the people involved and tell them why you felt this way...perhaps they might have had similar feelings, too, and it will open up the relationship a little.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to windy135)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Jealousy - 10/15/2006 9:57:34 PM

windy135

Posts: 437
Joined: 10/17/2005
Status: offline

Wow thank's everyone. It was one of those moments when you forget what to do. I wish I could just not care as much as I care. Everything is fine now. My reaction to him wasn't crazy but I could have handled it better. Just another thing I will work on. Thanks for the replies.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Jealousy - 10/16/2006 11:45:04 AM

jesskitty

Posts: 185
Joined: 9/4/2006
Status: offline

i think be honest and voice it..i think relationships that have alot of communication and understanding are some of the best ones. everyone gets jealous i belive, its a human emotion. i think the difference between being 'that girl/guy' that's jealous and expressing your jealousy is where you discuss things, find a comfort level and learn not to act crazily aobut it as 'that girl/guy' does.

(in reply to windy135)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Jealousy - 10/16/2006 12:01:06 PM

KatyLied

Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline

I don't have a huge problem with jealousy, but envy strikes a chord with me. I find myself wanting what others have. Of course I tend to romanticize what they have and think it's perfect, all the while not appreciating what I have. I meditate once a week on the subject of negative emotion.

As far as a relationship, I think that jealousy is very harmful. And where does it get you? It can get you a partner who will want to be driven away from you, so it can become self-fulfilling. Jealousy is useless, it won't prevent an unfortunate thing like that happening, and I think in some cases it can speed up the process.

_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to jesskitty)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Jealousy - 10/16/2006 8:45:24 PM

corsetgirl

Posts: 824
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I don't have a huge problem with jealousy, but envy strikes a chord with me. I find myself wanting what others have. Of course I tend to romanticize what they have and think it's perfect, all the while not appreciating what I have. I meditate once a week on the subject of negative emotion.

As far as a relationship, I think that jealousy is very harmful. And where does it get you? It can get you a partner who will want to be driven away from you, so it can become self-fulfilling. Jealousy is useless, it won't prevent an unfortunate thing like that happening, and I think in some cases it can speed up the process.

Excellent statement!