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missturbation -> Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:43:34 PM)

I'm not sure this is the right place for this or how this discussion will turn out but please i am not looking for people flaming each other. [:D]
After reading a thread in general and  noting the opinion of someone towards obese people it made me think.
Why are we so judgemental of others and what are the causes or what are the reasons we judge them? 
Are you intolerant of anything about a person and if so why? 



Kalira -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:45:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I'm not sure this is the right place for this or how this discussion will turn out but please i am not looking for people flaming each other. [:D]
After reading a thread in general and  noting the opinion of someone towards obese people it made me think.
Why are we so judgemental of others and what are the causes or what are the reasons we judge them? 
Are you intolerant of anything about a person and if so why? 

Actually, I can honestly say that I am intolerant of stupidity. Ignorance is one thing, but stupidity I have absolutly no tolerance for what-so-ever.



missturbation -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:47:41 PM)

But why?
What do you think causes you to feel this way about stupidity?



meatcleaver -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:48:59 PM)

When people proclaim their hionesty, integrity and high moral standards I switch off. Perhaps I've been on this earth too long but not long enough to have met a real saint.



Kalira -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:51:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

But why?
What do you think causes you to feel this way about stupidity?

why..hmm

ok, let me try and explain, never had to analyze it before though

to me, igorance just indicates a lack of knowledge, which can be remedied when handled in the correct way.

stupidity, on the other hand, seems to me to state that a person has no desire to learn anything new, to apply anything that they have learned, or to try and understand that there are always other sides to an issue. To me, that is just something that I have no patience with, no tolerance for. If a person makes an effort to understand, that's different, but one who does not...stay out of my way lol.



proudsub -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:52:30 PM)

quote:

Are you intolerant of anything about a person and if so why? 


Yes, slow golfers in front of me on the course. Why? because they are wasting my time while i wait for them and i lose my rhythm and don't play well.[:o]



LaTigresse -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:55:18 PM)

Narrow mindedness, being judgemental without having a clue about the other person's situation, bad personal hygiene, bad sense of humour.

Those are four things that pop into my head right away. If any of those fit a person I would appreciate they stay away from me.



missturbation -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 3:58:42 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

When people proclaim their hionesty, integrity and high moral standards I switch off. Perhaps I've been on this earth too long but not long enough to have met a real saint.


I'm honest, i have integrity and morals well id like to think they are of a good standard. It doesnt make me a saint though and nor would i proclaim to be. Why would you switch off from a person who as far as i can see has done nothing wrong?
 
Kalira - thank you.
 
Proudsub - lol, but i was actually looking for more weighty things such as intolerance to obesity, accent, habits, skinniness etc.  



missturbation -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:00:10 PM)

Why though?
What is it about those things that really annoys you?



SlaveAkasha -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:04:12 PM)

I think that people are usually intolerant of things they are afraid of in some way.  Maybe it's a quality you see in yourself and you don't like, so it makes you judge another for it.  Maybe it's a way you see your perfect little world, and their view is different, so rather that try and see it from their side, it's easier to just say they are wrong.
 
These are things I have even caught in myself when I have judged someone.  I catch it, and ask myself why I felt the way I did, it was usually one of the above.  I then try and change the way I look at it, or just accept that we are all different and they have as much of a right to their way of life, as I do mine.
 
That's just my opinion though..
Akasha



SexyRed -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:09:51 PM)

Most intolerance stems from fear and insecurity. No one would feel a need to bash others looks, size, ethnicity, tastes, political beliefs, etc. if they were not feeling bad about themselves.

Those who hate obesity for example, either they are afraid of it happening to them or they feel so horrible about themselves that they feel a need to proclaim their hatred for obese people. That is just one example.

Differences are great and preferences I can respect. What I do not respect are those who bash others with hostility just to make themselves feel better and to take out their frustrations and anger on others.

People who do that are pathetic. If you truly love yourself, you feel no need to put down others. Respecting differences and being intolerant are not the same thing. One is positive and the other is completely negative.



Kalira -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:13:17 PM)

quote:

I think that people are usually intolerant of things they are afraid of in some way.  Maybe it's a quality you see in yourself and you don't like, so it makes you judge another for it.

that makes no sense though. What you are saying is that if a person is intolerant of poor hygiene ( for example ) then it is because they suffer it themselves.
Or in my case, since I am intolerant of stupidity, then you are saying that it must be because its a trait I see in myself.

it makes no sense in the way you worded it.

quote:

  Maybe it's a way you see your perfect little world, and their view is different, so rather that try and see it from their side, it's easier to just say they are wrong.


Now this I would group with my idea of stupidity lol. Someone who acts in this way.



WyrdRich -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:13:43 PM)

    I'm intolerant of intolerance.  If that is hypocrisy, I can live with it.  Otherwise, to each his/her own.



ShiftedJewel -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:17:28 PM)

quote:

Are you intolerant of anything about a person and if so why? 


I'm intolerant of blind tolerance in a lot of people. The pc of it all... Why? Do you really have to ask me? I think I've made that more then clear on many occasions.
 
Jewel



cuddleheart50 -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:22:14 PM)

I am intolerant of liars and thiefs...



michaelGA2 -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:24:39 PM)

i'm intolerant of polititians



SlaveAkasha -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:31:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kalira

quote:

I think that people are usually intolerant of things they are afraid of in some way.  Maybe it's a quality you see in yourself and you don't like, so it makes you judge another for it.

that makes no sense though. What you are saying is that if a person is intolerant of poor hygiene ( for example ) then it is because they suffer it themselves.
Or in my case, since I am intolerant of stupidity, then you are saying that it must be because its a trait I see in myself.

it makes no sense in the way you worded it.

quote:

  Maybe it's a way you see your perfect little world, and their view is different, so rather that try and see it from their side, it's easier to just say they are wrong.


Now this I would group with my idea of stupidity lol. Someone who acts in this way.


What I am saying is that sometimes, (note the "sometimes") we judge others on qualities we see in ourselves and don't like.  For example, I had a friend that can't stand those that are gay, but it was always my thought and a few other peoples, that she herself was gay, and rather than look at herself, she judged others as being wrong in the way they were.
 
That is just one example, I have seen others.  Like maybe the former overweight person that now judges those that are, because they see themselves in that person and they are afraid to go back there.  I have another friend who did her share of drinking, but would judge anyone that went out and partied.  Rather than look at herself and realize she was an alchoholic, she judged those that went out and enjoyed themselves.  There was another one that grew up very poor, didn't really have anything, when she got older and had more things, she sort of looked down her nose at those that didn't.  It was her fear that she might end up back there, or somehow be associated with them in some way.
 
I am sure there a million more examples in just people that I know, including myself at some points, but I think my statement is very clear now.  This is what I meant about seeing yourself in others, and judging them for it.
 
Akasha
 
 



meatcleaver -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:33:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

quote:

ORIGINAL: meatcleaver

When people proclaim their hionesty, integrity and high moral standards I switch off. Perhaps I've been on this earth too long but not long enough to have met a real saint.


I'm honest, i have integrity and morals well id like to think they are of a good standard. It doesnt make me a saint though and nor would i proclaim to be. Why would you switch off from a person who as far as i can see has done nothing wrong?
 


When people talk about their own high standards, from my experience they usually rationalize away the flaws that they condemn other people for. Apart from that, the human condition is too complex to fit snuggly into these virtuous straitjackets and those people that do, tend to become warped, like fundemental religious people are.

Edited to add. - I've had a relationship against my better judgement with a self proclaimed saint and boy oh boy, did she have issues! I'll never go against reason again and have a relationship with another saint.



Quivver -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 4:39:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SlaveAkasha

I think that people are usually intolerant of things they are afraid of in some way.  Maybe it's a quality you see in yourself and you don't like, so it makes you judge another for it.
Akasha
  


My thoughts too, although the fear can be of the unknown of something in them they have yet to discover that they assume they cant face.

Well said Akasha!



BitaTruble -> RE: Opinions of others (10/17/2006 5:03:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

I'm not sure this is the right place for this or how this discussion will turn out but please i am not looking for people flaming each other. [:D]
After reading a thread in general and  noting the opinion of someone towards obese people it made me think.
Why are we so judgemental of others and what are the causes or what are the reasons we judge them? 
Are you intolerant of anything about a person and if so why? 


Most of the things I'm intolerant of are things which breed hate ... racism and other forms of bigotry being chief among them. I'm also intolerant of people who take advantage of others without their consent because it sets a precedent which can have dangerous effects in the long run.

Drama queens & vampires just take too much energy so I try to stay away from them as well but I wouldn't say that I'm intolerant, because they can be amusing on occasion.

And I'm intolerant of people who are nasty just because they can be. It serves no purpose and spoils other people fun, even if you ignore it usually you will have had to at least listen to it until you get away, or, if on the net, you've already read it and then it's too late. I think that's why I use my block button so much.. so I don't have to be exposed to it at all.

I'm sure there's more and I'm sure there are oodles of people who are intolerant of me and mine as well, but I sleep good at night and that's what really matters.

Celeste



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