Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: How do I leave Master


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: How do I leave Master Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/18/2006 7:27:00 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Is he aware of the collarme site?...if he is you may also need to not only change name but no longer have your pic as an avatar...Tempting

(in reply to amaidiamond)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/18/2006 9:18:03 PM   
diamonddreamlove


Posts: 770
Joined: 5/19/2006
Status: offline 		For one that has not experienced r/t then online is a good training ground and you have gotten a valuable lesson.  A collar in r/t is quite different than one online.  I did the online thing for about a year and learned a lot.  When i decided to go r/t with my husbands permission it was totaly different.  I will never go back to that alone.  Sir and i talk alot on line or phone we also have about 1 or 2 x a week to spend r/t.  Since that is what you crave and the online is not working then it is time to take another step forward and ditch online completely.  Go to munches and play parties and or meet the Doms/Masters you talk to here in r/t.  Just make sure you are careful and don't accept a collar until you truly know the person.  Oh and by the way i am a sub not a slave but if Sir were to allow me to argue with Him i would be completely shocked.  He does allow me to state my feelings and thoughts then He makes the decisions.  Have to wonder how one can constantly argue with their Master. 

_____________________________

"Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much." Robert Greenleaf

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 8:02:51 AM   
sublizzie


Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline 		Deleting him is a good choice. It can be scary to go from on-line to looking real-time. Real time is just more.....real. On-line can be just as emotionally intense but real time involves even more of you. It will take time for the emotional attachment to be completely severed, but it happens. And there are Dominants in real time who will probably be exactly what you need.

(in reply to sassiefire)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 8:27:21 AM   
zumala


Posts: 1121
Joined: 6/16/2005
Status: offline 		I can offer a little sympathy since I went through emotional hell in a screwed up on-line relationship back when I was 19 and 20 years old.  It can be hard to let go of something, even when it's detrimental to you.
 
But the fact of the matter is that these folks are all right.  YOU have to break the connection.  And I know there will likely be temptation to go back after you leave.  DON'T!  Fight the urge.  Go find yourself some r/t people to hang out with.
 
Best wishes,
 
zuma

(in reply to sublizzie)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 12:16:04 PM   
sweetnsasse


Posts: 8
Joined: 10/3/2006
Status: offline 		i have the same problem. he is my online master, i have asked for release but he wont. says i am not ready. monitors my online time. cheks my pal lists. i have asked for release over and over.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 12:21:30 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		Quit asking and just leave, a slave does have that right. If you really wanted out of this, you'd get yourself out. If you can't then you may consider seeing a mental health professional, it maybe co dependency.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 1:59:45 PM   
afeathr


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/1/2006
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sassiefire

I've talked to him, tried to make him understand it's not working for me. He says I am slave and it doesn't matter what I want, He will not release me. He has been my online dom for 9 months with no r/t and He knew from the beginning I have to have r/t. I am tired of the arguing, I just want to be free. What can i do? Please help!!!


Not that it matters at this point, but... what would happen if this *were* r/t??  You have this much angst over an online relationship (and believe me, I am not knocking it, just making a point), but what if this were the real deal?  How would you deal with it?  At some point, this may happen and you will need to be prepared.  Not every Dom/Master is "the one" and often we have to cut ties and move on.  Given your feelings now, you might want to think about this before moving into a r/t relationship. 

_____________________________

afeathr

-Going where the wind blows me...

(in reply to sassiefire)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 2:01:58 PM   
afeathr


Posts: 248
Joined: 6/1/2006
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnsasse

i have the same problem. he is my online master, i have asked for release but he wont. says i am not ready. monitors my online time. cheks my pal lists. i have asked for release over and over.


Same rule applies... close your online account completely and start over.  That's the beauty of the Internet.

How long must we go on about this before people will realize that you can't *know* someone online??  They could be ANYBODY!!!  You are relying on what they are saying to you without any basis of knowledge.  Would you do that with someone you met at a bar??  I think not.

No one can hold you captive - except you.

_____________________________

afeathr

-Going where the wind blows me...

(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 2:09:04 PM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		change all your passwords and say buh bye

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to afeathr)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 10:04:37 PM   
sweetnsasse


Posts: 8
Joined: 10/3/2006
Status: offline 		i have tried changing my account, he is very good with computers he always knows when i am online. he has all my phone nos and calls me at odd hours just to let me know he is watching

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 10:10:01 PM   
LadySeraphina


Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnsasse

i have tried changing my account, he is very good with computers he always knows when i am online. he has all my phone nos and calls me at odd hours just to let me know he is watching


At this point you need to be more drastic. You may need to speak to a counsellor - try a distress line, they can give you the emotional resources you need. Since he's been calling you, you may want to warn him that you will file a restraining order if he doesn't leave you alone. If you do, you have to be prepared to follow through if needed.

Good luck.

_____________________________

"Men are like wine. They start out as grapes and its up to the woman to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with." -Unknown

www.LadySeraphina.ca

www.SeraphinasToybox.com.

(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 10:23:02 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnsasse

i have tried changing my account, he is very good with computers he always knows when i am online. he has all my phone nos and calls me at odd hours just to let me know he is watching


I am not sure what the stalking laws are in Canada but I would definately check them out. This is stalking.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 10:40:54 PM   
texancutie


Posts: 322
Joined: 7/23/2005
Status: offline 		Having met someone online last year who got all my information...not just all my phone numbers but my real name and home address as well, I can kind of understand.  Don't ask...I was a totally clueless newbie.  It was my first real or should I say surreal experience in this...lol.  But, I met this dude real life, scened my first meet,  and of course learned a valuable lesson from it...to say the least.  I am not going to complain, or say how hurt I was in the forums, or how unfortunate I was.  I learn from my mistakes.  You are lucky this is just online and you learned early.  Just change your profile, remove your picture and change your phone numbers.  I know the changing of phone numbers is an inconvienence but will be worth it in the end.  And don't forget to block him if he is stalking you.  Never return any email or messages.  Slaves can leave their Masters and obviously you have good reason to.  I personally think that once you ask to leave, it is over anyway.  The magic is lost.  Poof.  If one does request to leave, it is always great to remain friends, but in this case it appears you are dealing with a nut.  You can stop all the drama if you want to.  It is within your power to do so.  All these people have given you some great advice.  Now the rest is up to you.

Oh, also be aware that he can always create new profiles and contact you under those.  But just be smart about it.  You can usually tell if you pay attention.  If you suspect it is him, cut communication off.  Especially if you can not deal with the situation.  Eventually he will tire of the game and give up.


< Message edited by texancutie -- 10/19/2006 10:47:20 PM >

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 11:01:32 PM   
zero69u2


Posts: 107
Joined: 7/12/2004
Status: offline 		run to the north.. but runaway slaves will always be captured..
You will be captured, used as a slave, and then taken south and sold as a slave in the nearest city.

your old masters cyber marks and velcro collar will no longer protect you.
as a runaway online slave you will be in the wilderness.. with real men... :)
exciting isn't it.. the possibility of being used and sold.







(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/19/2006 11:12:11 PM   
texancutie


Posts: 322
Joined: 7/23/2005
Status: offline 		lol  zero.....Do real men in the wilderness come with online stds?  If they do I can pass...not that I am anti-Gorean or anything.   Anyway I was taking the inital poster's problem as a real problem for her.  But I appreciate a sense of humor in life.   

(in reply to zero69u2)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/20/2006 12:16:03 AM   
BuxomGoddess321


Posts: 20
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnsasse
i have tried changing my account, he is very good with computers he always knows when i am online. he has all my phone nos and calls me at odd hours just to let me know he is watching


It is watching you online so get off the crack pipe, girl.  Change your phone number or block his, get some therapy and for goodness sake, pull the plug.  You are old enough to know we survived just FINE without this stupid box.  Get off your butt, go outside.  Go to munches and events.  Volunteer at a soup kitchen, work at a cancer center, go hold drug babies, work-out, take some classes, read a book, play an instrument, travel, get a job, do something real and worthwhile for real people or yourself.  Get a real life, meet real people who have real problems.  Play cards with real friends instead of online games with strangers.  You'll feel much better.  Won't have time to ask people you don't know what to do about some imaginary jerk you never met from a virtual world.  If your world has become so small, unplug it.  Get professional help if you can't turn off your computer.  They'll direct you to appropriate support groups.  Real friends give real hugs.

(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/20/2006 5:44:35 AM   
sophia37


Posts: 1433
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline 		Maybe what your looking for is proper closure. Are you a person who believes manners are important? If so then write a polite letter. Something heartfelt with some good thoughts to it. Then you have effectively completed your obligation. Right now youre feeling guilty for a variety of reasons.

Im sure what your waiting for is for the guy to change his mind and let you go, no hard feelings and all that jazz. I get it. Its not bad to want that. But sometimes we must be the ones to find the closure. He's not as strong as he thinks he is, if he cant with good graces give you your due. Why he would even want to be carrying on with a person who doesnt want to carry on with him, is a complete mystery.

It is what it is. So do what you have to do. Youve come away from it having learned a valuable lesson. So see? Theres been good in all of this. Now go mop up the mess. Thats what a good sub would do.

(in reply to BuxomGoddess321)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/20/2006 7:25:55 AM   
Kalira


Posts: 954
Joined: 10/9/2006
From: Fort Wayne Indiana
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnsasse

i have the same problem. he is my online master, i have asked for release but he wont. says i am not ready. monitors my online time. cheks my pal lists. i have asked for release over and over.

Umm, there is such a thing as changing passwords  if he has it that is.

_____________________________

Facilius Per Partes In Cognitionem Totius Adducimur
We are more easily led part by part to an understanding of the whole.
Seneca

Damnant Quod Non Intellegunt

(in reply to sweetnsasse)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/20/2006 7:56:29 AM   
sassiefire


Posts: 9
Joined: 7/27/2006
Status: offline 		sophia, yes I think you hit it right on. Everyone here has said hes a nut, leave him. I've taken the 1st steps, written him a respectful FO letter, blocked his email address. Yes he has other screen names, but his language is very unique and hopefully I will be smart enough to know if he contacts me there.
I'm also clueless as to why he, or anyone for that matter, would want another who quite obviously and has stated verbally and in writing said she is not interested.
Yes a very valuable lesson in what I do not want and more about what I need.
Learning is good.

Grabs the mop. 

(in reply to sophia37)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: How do I leave Master - 10/22/2006 5:34:49 AM   
cillydom


Posts: 332
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline 		Someone that tries to hold on this much seems to me a desperate person without much pride, is that what is wanted in a master?
A dom in control of himself would be willing to walk away and not look back when the time comes.

(in reply to spanklette)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: How do I leave Master Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094