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Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 7:06:08 AM

submaleslaveuk

Posts: 95
Joined: 7/21/2006
From: Manchester UK
Status: offline

Dear all,

i have been thinking quite a bit recently regarding the topic of cuckolding. Is this becoming more and more popular in the realm of Female Domination? It is something i am beginning to think i will come across and i do not know how i am going to act.

If you deconstuct Femdom then the underlying theme is that the Woman gets what she wants, so if she wants to take another partner then surely that is her choice? Are there many Dommes out there who can still have sub as a equal partner but just Dominant in the bedroom??

Just trying to get my head around the whole aspect of this topic, as i do not want to have any hard limits when i do EVENTUALLY find my Domme partner!

Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

Take care all

submaleslaveuk
darren

Post #: 1

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 7:29:06 AM

demistress

Posts: 391
Joined: 4/24/2006
From: Dela-where?
Status: offline

If I find a life partner who is submissive, that person will be "cuckold" it does not mean I love them any less. I expect them to take joy in the fact that I enjoy sex, and see my pleasure as their pleasure.

I am polyamorous by nature, I currently have 4 people in my life I love, I will not be giving any of them up. As long as my sub or slave is confident in my care for them, it should not be an issue. I will not 'spring' this on someone down the road. I am very open about my being polyamorous at the beginning of correspondence.

_____________________________

Mistress Heather
www.niteflirt.com/MizzSpice

Wether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right!

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 2

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 8:19:35 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleslaveuk

...i have been thinking quite a bit recently regarding the topic of cuckolding. Is this becoming more and more popular in the realm of Female Domination? It is something i am beginning to think i will come across and i do not know how i am going to act...

...Just trying to get my head around the whole aspect of this topic...

...Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

interesting topic.

i've never actually known what the word means so i did some reading. personally, i could not handle it at all. at this point in my life i just could not get my head or my heart around sharing a partner in any way, shape or form.

i commend you on psychologically preparing yourself for such a situation. i really don't know much about the fem dom 'realm' so i can't give you any answers other than my own thoughts and feelings.

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 3

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 8:30:46 AM

wolfhouse

Posts: 2
Joined: 10/17/2006
Status: offline

I have found that I love it when my Ms has a freind. I do love to get every going and then clean them up.
sub greg

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 4

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 8:32:47 AM

UtopianRanger

Posts: 3251
Status: offline

quote:

Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

Yeah.... I thinks its best left for the Pigeons. But many of the lady friends I have who are associated with collarme complain that they receive message after message after message of dudes wanting to engage in this kink. Go figure.

- R

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 5

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 8:41:28 AM

onestandingstill

Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline

Hello There,
I think in the right light having a Cuckold come in and play with you and your Mistress in the humiliation and denying you pleasure mode can be a fun thing.
I think depending on how comfortable you are in your relationship and your own sexual performance decides if it works for the two of you or hinders your relationship.
This type of play has great potential to be hot as hell, and at the same time it can be hurtful depending on the individuals involved.

As I'm a sub this has not come into play in my relationships.
I have done some swinging with a partner once though.
I personally find it incredibly hot to see someone I'm intimate with having sex someone else.
I also think my place in someones heart and desires is not affected with any one else having a place in there too.
Over all it depends on your jealousy and self confidence as to if it can work for you comfortably.
suzanne

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 6

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 9:11:07 AM

submaleslaveuk

Posts: 95
Joined: 7/21/2006
From: Manchester UK
Status: offline

Thanks for the thoughts so far. Many thanks to onestandingstill as i have never really thought about it from the femsub perspective. Thanks for the insight. i know it is different strokes for different folks but if i find my perfect Domme and She is really into the cuckolding scene i do need to prepare myself for that scenario.

Oh by the way gypsylee i would love to hear your thoughts on it too if you are willing to share!!

Thanks all

submaleslaveuk
darren

(in reply to onestandingstill)

Post #: 7

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 9:39:51 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleslaveuk
If you deconstuct Femdom then the underlying theme is that the Woman gets what she wants, so if she wants to take another partner then surely that is her choice? Are there many Dommes out there who can still have sub as a equal partner but just Dominant in the bedroom??

Darren,

Many of us don't just want him submissive to us just in the bedroom...

< Message edited by MisPandora -- 10/18/2006 9:40:57 AM >

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 8

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 9:42:37 AM

gypsylee

Posts: 293
Joined: 9/18/2006
From: Melbournia, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleslaveuk

Oh by the way gypsylee i would love to hear your thoughts on it too if you are willing to share!!

hehe, well i'm willing to share my thoughts, just not my men :)

um. well like i said, i couldn't handle it. i've been in vanilla mff's before, with a guy who i wasn't even really interested in, and i still ended up getting shitty cos i wasn't the centre of attention. i do like playing with girls tho so i'd do it again (at some stage) but i'll damn well make sure i'm the centre of attention ;)

from what i've read, 'traditional' cuckolding involves the introduction of another man without the 'original' man's consent, ie. being unfaithful. then if she fell pregnant to the other man, the 'original' man was humiliated by the people around them.

i dont think this would be much fun for any man. but you are correct in thinking that it's become part of the femdom thing and as UtopianRanger said, it's quite a popular kink.

i don't get it, in fact it'd be my nightmare, but i'm a green-eyed fem sub with claws ;)

_____________________________

You're one twisted fuck... Nup, I'm just an ordinary girl with nothin' to lose.

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 9

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 10:32:33 AM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger
Yeah.... I thinks its best left for the Pigeons. But many of the lady friends I have who are associated with collarme complain that they receive message after message after message of dudes wanting to engage in this kink. Go figure. - R

Yes, that has certainly been My experience. I was getting so many of them that I had to make a few changes to My profile. At first, I didn't even list cuckolding as an interest one way or other but now have listed it as one of My "Hates" to discourage these people from contacting Me. Next, I had to put specific instructions in My profile for those seeking a cuckolding relationship NOT to contact Me. Guess what? Some still do, though the numbers have decreased dramatically since those changes.

The truth is that it isn't a hard limit for Me. I have done it in the past (in a vanilla relationship, believe it or not) and may or may not do again. It is only something I would want to explore long into an established relationship, if at all.

If others enjoy this type of relationship, more power to them. I just would really, really prefer that those with this as a primary interest not contact Me at all.

Lady Topaz

(in reply to UtopianRanger)

Post #: 10

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 10:41:18 AM

ToGiveDivine

Posts: 650
Status: offline

You have to have a strong personal relationship to have successful cuckold relationship.

The Domme thinking she can have whoever / whenever is in a position to court disaster. The Domme that is truly committed to their sub, that works with their sub, can make it work and both will get benefit from it.

Something about your partner being with another who is younger, better looking, and/or better hung and knowing that you are still very dear to her and she's not replacing you is interesting and can invoke some deep feelings.

When done right, the trust and respect between the Domme and the sub can become very powerful.

It has been said that every women should have 2 men - one to cook and one to clean LOL

(in reply to gypsylee)

Post #: 11

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 12:35:42 PM

subfever

Posts: 2895
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleslaveuk

Dear all,

i have been thinking quite a bit recently regarding the topic of cuckolding. Is this becoming more and more popular in the realm of Female Domination? It is something i am beginning to think i will come across and i do not know how i am going to act.

If you deconstuct Femdom then the underlying theme is that the Woman gets what she wants, so if she wants to take another partner then surely that is her choice? Are there many Dommes out there who can still have sub as a equal partner but just Dominant in the bedroom??

Just trying to get my head around the whole aspect of this topic, as i do not want to have any hard limits when i do EVENTUALLY find my Domme partner!

Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

Take care all

submaleslaveuk
darren

I think the key is to establish open communication at the onset of any relationship.

Cuckolding within F/m relationships seem to be growing in popularity. So it would probably be wise for you to discuss any such possibilities with your prospective Domme prior to establishing a relationship with her.

If your prosepective Domme states that cuckolding is a possibility in your future, then it's up to you to either accept this or continue looking elsewhere. If she explains that cuckolding is not a possibility, then she's not entitled to change the rules on you at a later date.

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 12

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 12:56:55 PM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

quote:

Is this becoming more and more popular in the realm of Female Domination?

I don't know, I don't have any statistics. However, it is certainly not something new. There are those who want one on one relationships and other who want more of a poly relationship that may or may not involve cuckolding.

quote:

It is something i am beginning to think i will come across and i do not know how i am going to act.

Well, this is one of those things that the reality may be very different than the thought process. You may be all set in your head to be gung ho about it but when it actually happens, you are not as keen on the idea. Whatever you do and whatever you decide, be honest with your partner or potential partner about your feelings and experience. If you think you may be ok with it, tell her that but also tell her that you've never actually experienced it.

quote:

If you deconstuct Femdom then the underlying theme is that the Woman gets what she wants, so if she wants to take another partner then surely that is her choice?

Most of us will be up front about that part. Yes ultimately it is her choice but you also have a choice to accept it or find someone else. Best to be as compatible as possible from the onset. People do grow and change and one may say they want monogamy but years later poly sparks their interest. As usual, communication and honesty is key here.

quote:

Are there many Dommes out there who can still have sub as a equal partner but just Dominant in the bedroom??

I don't know. I have never wanted to be only a bedroom dominant. I think many femdoms want a lot more then play in their relationships. If this is not something you are willing or able to provide, make sure you are up front about that too. Many dominants want an intelligent, interesting, self sufficient submissive. But I would not say most want their D/s dynamic to end in the morning when you go off to work, either. Different strokes and all that. Each person is different.

quote:

Just trying to get my head around the whole aspect of this topic, as i do not want to have any hard limits when i do EVENTUALLY find my Domme partner!

Good luck with that. I have been doing what I do for a looong time and I still have limits. Granted what I had on day one and what I have now are vastly different but there are still some there. Don't think of a limit as a bad thing. The are there for a reason.

quote:

Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

I have a lot of people message me who are interested in just that aspect of play. They will maybe tolerate other forms of play or control as long as they are a cuckold to me. So, it can be someone's fetish in some instances. Others do it as a form of control and others do it as a form of play. There are also varying degrees of how it is implemented. Again, depends on the person :)

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 13

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 4:32:04 PM

UtopianRanger

Posts: 3251
Status: offline

quote:

Yes, that has certainly been My experience. I was getting so many of them that I had to make a few changes to My profile. At first, I didn't even list cuckolding as an interest one way or other but now have listed it as one of My "Hates" to discourage these people from contacting Me. Next, I had to put specific instructions in My profile for those seeking a cuckolding relationship NOT to contact Me. Guess what? Some still do, though the numbers have decreased dramatically since those changes.

*Wink* Whatever happened to the old-fashioned relationship, where there's a lota rough sex, some sweet pain and the guy is just deeply devoted to the lady. They work their asses off, retire by fifty, travel, have more rough sex and sweet pain and laugh at all the neighbors who have to work until they're sixty-five or seventy. Why is there a need to complicate such matters with something obtuse like cuckolding?

- R

_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton

(in reply to MysticFireTopaz)

Post #: 14

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 5:26:27 PM

WhiteRadiance

Posts: 247
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

My suggestion to you is that you express to your future partner your concerns about all of the things you find unappealing. Tell her how you feel and ask her how she feels. Be open to growing in ways you never thought you would.

A Mistress who is very sexually active and not in love with her slave, nor he with her- it is NOT the same as being in a loving, continuing relationship. For a Mistress to have a slave boy present while she is fucked, to watch and clean up- may be a very common kink. It does seem to be a huge fantasy for some subs- moreso than Dommes.

In a relationship where both partners are equally devoted, I think his delight in her pleasure can strengthen the bond. However, I would not condone cuckolding in a relationship where the Mistress fucks any and everyone and treats her slave like dirt. Not only are feelings involved, there are also health issues to consider.

quote:

ORIGINAL: submaleslaveuk

Anybody have any thoughts or theories on the topic of cuckolding??

Take care all

submaleslaveuk
darren

_____________________________

Staci

The drop of rain makes a hole in a stone not by violence, but by often falling.

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 15

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 5:29:14 PM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Why is it always men who ask about cuckolding?

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 16

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 5:34:26 PM

Aubre

Posts: 478
Joined: 12/9/2004
Status: offline

The term for a wife whose husband openly has sex with multiple partners while she does not is called a cuckquean.
Who knows, maybe it is the next big thing.

http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/cuckquean

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 17

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/18/2006 5:51:42 PM

DeviantLady

Posts: 38
Joined: 9/12/2006
Status: offline

Damn and I thought I was the next big thing.

(in reply to Aubre)

Post #: 18

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/19/2006 12:53:38 PM

submaleslaveuk

Posts: 95
Joined: 7/21/2006
From: Manchester UK
Status: offline

You should be the next big thing DeviantLady ;)
Great pic and profile by the way!

submaleslaveuk
darren

(in reply to DeviantLady)

Post #: 19

RE: Cuckolding! - 10/19/2006 1:07:50 PM

LadySeraphina

Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline

I personally - despite being a proDomme - have sex only with my houseboy, as he is my lifemate. I have no desire for sexual contact with anyone else, and if someone tried to make a move on my boy, I would rip them slowly limb from limb. In our relationship I am Dominant in and out of the bedroom, but unless we are specifically playing, it's more a matter of him seeking to please me - cooking, doing errands, giving me massages, and filling my coffee cup. We interact in a way that often appears vanilla to others.

I also have a collared boy who is not my houseboy. His interests lie in chastity play, corporal punishment, and making me happy. He and my houseboy are friends, and we are looking into a home together, where we will all raise my child (I am hoping to conceive next summer).

Interestingly, there are poly aspects, as we are all so very fond of one another, but I only have romantic love for my houseboy, and there is no other sex.

*Okay, that was a much longer rant than I intended, and maybe TMI, but my point is that you can end up in all sorts of relationships with a Domme, and you just need to communicate, and find out what works for both of you. Whether that's monogamy, polyamory, cuckolding, or something else entirely is up to the two (or more) of you to work out. Have fun!

_____________________________

"Men are like wine. They start out as grapes and its up to the woman to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with." -Unknown

www.LadySeraphina.ca

www.SeraphinasToybox.com.

(in reply to submaleslaveuk)

Post #: 20

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