quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

Dear Sirs:
When a conversation, either online or on the phone starts out with the Dom asking me "So... Tell me about yourself."  i freeze.  The question is so vague and of course my sense of humor so twisted that my first thought is from the classic Steve Martin movie "The Jerk" and i want to say "i was born a poor black child....."

i have thought to actually write down a "script" of interesting things to say "about myself" and i've tried to recite certain things but it seems awkward and contrived. 

So my question is this:  What kinds of things does the prospective Dom want to know when He says "Tell me about yourself." ?  Do You want to know the basics (i would think by the phone call stage He'd know those) of where i live, my age, sex, location, what i do for a living, what my kinks are?  Is there some other way to recite "something about myself" without sounding like i'm doing an oral report for a class i'm taking?  Should i have some highlights of my life and my BDSM experiences prepared ahead of time?

Any thoughts or opinions will be appreciated.  Thank You.

quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

I have thought to actually write down a "script" of interesting things to say "about myself" and i've tried to recite certain things but it seems awkward and contrived. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

You are so right about that kind of conversation, adaddysgirl.  So often, I'm at a loss for what to do when someone mails me because I don't see where to take the conversation and it never builds any energy or momentum.

In general, I'm more likely to respond to mails in which the Dominant asks some specific questions also.  Or, he tells me something about himself, then asks a more general, "how about you," kind of question. I usually answer in a way that takes off from what he told me.  For example, if he tells me about his experience I tell him mine, if he tells me about his day to day life, my answers focus on my day to day life.

The way I see it, even at this early stage of communication, one important question is how does his supposed ability to dominate manifest itself?  Can he guide and direct a conversation while at the same time making me feel like a full participant?  Or am I at a loss as to what he wants or expects?  Or, and this is just as bad, if not worse, do I feel uneccessary to the conversation, like I'm just a potential object for his desire to dominate?

i just read your profile.  So could you tell me about yourself?  

Sorry, i just couldn't resist 

BTW...i noticed you are from CNY.  i am from the Syracuse area.  Small world, ain't it? 

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ORIGINAL: RedSavageSlave

And you want all this over the phone?

quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

*smiles and waves at adaddysgirl*

Yes, its a very small world!

Waves back 

under general bdsm.  Looks like something i'd receive in my email...lol 

quote:

ORIGINAL: aldarion

I have often been put off by that question myself, especially being a newbie, because I really have no idea what to say to a complete stranger about me(especially ones calling themselves some pretty threatening names)  I don't know what they are looking for me to say, and also, I think to myself:  I took so much time to write that profile, I think any questions should be a little more specific and at least show me you read the thing! *frustrated* It's not easy.

i think if we had blank profiles (as some do)....or a one line profile....we could see someone asking such a question.  Otherwise, read the dang profile and ask me something of substance....sheesh!     And it really doesn't get any better because even after 2 1/2 yrs of being on here, i still get them