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I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 11:58:36 AM   
Chellegame


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/28/2006
Status: offline
Ladies, Dommes and Mistresses: I realize ths is silly-soon, but I am quite unhappy, to the point of tears. I posted my profile and picture just yesterday and have over 200 emails... from men. The sole exceptions are several nice trans people, a sub woman writing for her male Dom and three couples where the man wrote the email. Is there any way I might better be noticed by Dommes? I'm bi, but have always had F/f realationships. Please?
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RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:09:07 PM   
Chellegame


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/28/2006
Status: offline
Vanilla!!?? I'm not Vanilla! Oh, no...

(in reply to Chellegame)
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RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:14:16 PM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline
The vanilla sign will disappear after a small number of posts. (See Ranking thread in the general bdsm forum.)
 
The mail deluge will also stop once their attention goes to other, newer members.
 
Perhaps there is some filter that blocks mails from males? I believe that there filters for age and such.

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:15:46 PM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
I'm afraid you may just need to be patient and do some initiating yourself.  As a new female member you are bound to get a lot of emails from men.  Fresh meat and all ;) a lot of Domme females do not often initiate emails, so find profiles you like and email them.  Also, staying active in the forums will get you noticed more.  The vanilla cone is based on post count.  As you post more, it will go away. 

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:18:42 PM   
Chellegame


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/28/2006
Status: offline
Thank you, Rule, I was just rummaging around 'Edit Profile' anout that obnoxious fruit... whew! It's not that I *just* want to hear from women, but the... almost absence is distressing.
That the deluge will cease is also reassuring.

(in reply to Rule)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:18:49 PM   
ShyMistress


Posts: 173
Joined: 6/21/2006
From: your sexiest nightmare ;)
Status: offline
Hello Chellegame...

Welcome to CM ...to be honest in your profile I do not see any real indication that you would prefer women over men to contact you. It is a nice profile though...and a very lovely smile in your pic. Good luck to you here

PS...The ice cream is in relation to the amount of posts you have made so far...not your lifestyle preferences

_____________________________

"Everyone is a potential naked slave to You once You become a Trainer." -Anne Rice-

~*~ Proud Owner of kajiradream, patiently awaiting her return Home ~*~


(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 12:52:28 PM   
LadyFeline


Posts: 13
Joined: 4/18/2006
Status: offline
Well, I agree with MsKatHuston, Dommes do not often approach other females. Reasons for this may differ, but the most common one that I've heard is that there are so few true female subs out there who aren't just looking around for their masters (which is hella annoying). It's also that there are many severely emotionally damaged female subs, and although it's tempting to try and fix them, it's too much hassle. No Domme wants that.

You should take the initiative. Look for profiles you're interested in, and make first contact with them.

(in reply to ShyMistress)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 1:21:01 PM   
Chellegame


Posts: 10
Joined: 10/28/2006
Status: offline
Thank you, Lady Feline, MsKatHusto, Shymistress, and again, Rule.
I didn't think I needed anything specifying women, other than 'bi' though what you said makes sense. I've also seen (after 18 hours) a slowing of the flood. Just 10 an hour.
I still don't even know how anyone would see who was new, or how to look at profiles based on criteria. I'm not vanilla, really, but I'm a beginner in this place.
While I'm here, though.. I'd LOVE to meet a loving Domme.

(in reply to LadyFeline)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 1:37:44 PM   
Rule


Posts: 10479
Joined: 12/5/2005
Status: offline
On the other side, if you are logged in, to the left of the screen are five buttons for new users, favourite users, blocked users, admirers. That is how they know that you are a new user: you are on that list.

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 1:37:44 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline
I will echo what some of the others have said and add to it.  Most dommes I know do not initiate email at all to either gender, at least on the other side.  I do not remember ever even doing a search actually, for male or female.  I will however email someone, male or female, dom/me or sub, if something on this side catches my attention, or something they say on this side makes me check out their profile on the other side.  I have some good friends that way, and others just wanted to share a quick note or ask a question of them.  Unfortunately, smiles, you will probably have to email the dommes on the other side, unless you get noticed here, but this side "ain't all bad", lol.  And yes, the fresh meat smell will leave your email box soon.

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 1:44:04 PM   
sissifytoserve


Posts: 1016
Joined: 8/30/2006
Status: offline
200 men huh???

Wow.

Sure beats the measly amount of dominant women who have contacted me (I could count them on my two hands.)

Any time I try to contact them its always "sorry..not interested in sissy/cds"...or "too old...or.....too young".


Mabye someday i'll hit the lottery.




< Message edited by sissifytoserve -- 10/29/2006 1:53:12 PM >


_____________________________

A great mind must be androgynous
Samuel Coleridge

The uniting of the feminine and the masculine is the highest form of human development Carl Jung

(in reply to kc692)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 5:40:14 PM   
LadyAlexa


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2005
Status: offline
To adjust mail flow:
Click on Read Mail icon on left side.  In the next window click on Mail Controls.  You can then click on whatever limits you want.  The messages go into a bulk folder that you can check from time to time and delete.   You might get message there that are 'just saying hello and welcome' from those that don't fit what you haven't checked. 

As others have said: fresh meat always brings out the vultures.  Some Dommes will initiate emails some won't.     You can always post here a draft letter of what you would write to a Domme if you want us to critique it for you.

Good luck in your search.

_____________________________

Lady Alexa
[amber]

Submission is key not gender.

GLBT approved.

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 5:43:32 PM   
LadyAlexa


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Chellegame

Thank you, Lady Feline, MsKatHusto, Shymistress, and again, Rule.
I didn't think I needed anything specifying women, other than 'bi' though what you said makes sense. I've also seen (after 18 hours) a slowing of the flood. Just 10 an hour.
I still don't even know how anyone would see who was new, or how to look at profiles based on criteria. I'm not vanilla, really, but I'm a beginner in this place.
While I'm here, though.. I'd LOVE to meet a loving Domme.


In your profile you have checked off that you are seeking Dominant Women, Men or Trans.  I'd suggest you alter that if you want to attract just Dommes.  Too bad Manitoba is so far away  :)  course I"ve never been that far west in Canada.

_____________________________

Lady Alexa
[amber]

Submission is key not gender.

GLBT approved.

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 5:49:43 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
I am bi and have been looking for a fem for me for a looong time. Men just want to watch. I have found it hard to find someone that is honest, so I will keep looking. Just delete and move on. Good luck to you.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 5:55:09 PM   
LadyAlexa


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

I am bi and have been looking for a fem for me for a looong time. Men just want to watch. I have found it hard to find someone that is honest, so I will keep looking. Just delete and move on. Good luck to you.


sweetnurse:  ok your signarture says you are collared! So color me confused.

_____________________________

Lady Alexa
[amber]

Submission is key not gender.

GLBT approved.

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 5:57:32 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
I am bi and we are looking for a fem for me. I like to be with women sometimes. I do not think that is hard to understand. Being with another woman doesnt mean it has to be a sub/slave.

< Message edited by sweetnurseBBW -- 10/29/2006 6:00:21 PM >


_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to LadyAlexa)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 6:00:42 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, you were on the new users list as of last night...don't know when you left it today..........I know cause I was scoping.........I figured you were getting 90 billion inane emails per nanosecond and my little Howdy! pretty lady hellova smile-- wouldn't have done anything to brighten your day, it is pretty certain that would not be the first time you heard it. 

I agree with most of the women here,  now that you are off the list it will slow down  somewhat, as you are well aware  if you stop to consider it, most women are somewhat more circumspect in  personal relations than a man is given to.  They will search specifics and hunt you down in time...........alotta men just shotgun the perimiters and hope to haul off alotta dead...........

Hang in there, it gets better!!!!!!  But never completely subsides as you can easily learn by seaching the dearth of threads on this very subject.......LOLOLOL.

Sincerely,
Ron


_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to Chellegame)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 6:08:42 PM   
LadyAlexa


Posts: 141
Joined: 1/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

I am bi and we are looking for a fem for me. I like to be with women sometimes. I do not think that is hard to understand. Being with another woman doesnt mean it has to be a sub/slave.

ahhh now it's clear  :)  thanks for the explanation.  No it's not hard to understand at all. 

_____________________________

Lady Alexa
[amber]

Submission is key not gender.

GLBT approved.

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 6:13:21 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
No problem

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to LadyAlexa)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: I'm bi, but ONLY men have emailed re my profile - 10/29/2006 6:37:47 PM   
MstrssScarlet


Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline
I agree with just about everyone on here....I'm a domme (Pro Domme actually) and I never contact subs or slaves.  Partly because of the "Pro" part.  I don't want anyone thinking I'm after them for 'business' purposes.  Even though we are looking for a 24/7 female sub (I am bi also), I rarely contact anyone on this site unless it's something along the lines of  "Great pictures!" or "Just be patient and keep your chin up".  If you wanted to get to know me, you would have to initiate the contact.  I'm too far of course...just adding my 2 cents.
Mistress Scarlet

_____________________________

"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
Jean Harlow in The Beast of the City

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 20
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