Master/Dom difference (Full Version)

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Dnomyar -> Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 4:44:12 AM)

I saw this in a profile and I took it that the person is splitting hairs. They state that a Dom is not a true Master. Dom and Master are just titles. Does the word Master sound more majestic than Dom. I think that they both serve the same function. I think that submissives serve either with just as much pashion. Im here to learn so if Im wrong please enlighten me.




Rover -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:04:52 AM)

Language is always evolving.
 
Historically, "Master" indicated the relationship of an individual to their "slave" (ie: it was relative to the two or more people in a specific relationship) in an S/M relationship.  Over the years, terms such as "submissive" and "Dominant" were introduced to the lifestyle lexicon as heterosexuals became more prevalent, and the lifestyle  came to include bondage & discipline, and power exchange relationships.
 
Later some notable science fiction books began to distinguish between "Masters" as a gender oriented label in a particular Master/slave relationship.  Other people began to distinguish between your run of the mill "Dominant" and a "Master" who has demonstrated some particular aptitude at specific skills (as in a "whip Master").  Some (a very few) communities bestowed the title upon those (few) in their group that have made meaningful contributions over the years and have become local icons (in which case the "honorific" is used exclusively within that group). 
 
But by far the largest body of "Masters" are those practicing self-masturbatory adulation, in which they bestow the title upon themselves in an amusing effort to appear more important than they are. 
 
John




BigbadBob1 -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:15:28 AM)

Hmmm I remember reading an article on Literotica that was kind of like that.  I'm probably misquoting but here goes. 

The author was defining Alpha males and listing qualities she would associate with an Alpha.  The funniest part aka what I remeber most was the illiteration to John Wayne as what an alpha male was like.

I'll go looking for that profile you saw but I'm guessing that she is defining a true Master as an alpha.  Think I'll try and find that article and reread it too.




Archer -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:22:39 AM)

Rover covered the topic reasonably well.

I'll only add here that today some folks use Master to denote the difference between a D type in a D/s relationship and an M/s relationship.




Dnomyar -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:24:37 AM)

Ty Rover great reply




Dnomyar -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:29:49 AM)

I agree that some do become true Masters at their craft. The majority here are Masters in their own mind.




mistoferin -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:33:09 AM)

Wait a minute.....you guys can't get off that easy. Although I like Rover's reply. I think though, that there is a requirement when you are trying to define a difference, that you have to have a 17 page thread full of name calling where the end result is that you are chastised for even asking the question and no one comes to a definitive conclusion.




deltadawn -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:36:16 AM)

A Title is a only a title, I agree with Rover on this one.

dawn




adaddysgirl -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 5:43:56 AM)

When i first got into D/s, most responses i would get were from 'Masters'....either it was in their nic...or they signed their correspondences that way.  Really, just out of being naive, i would ask them how they acquired that title because at the time, i did think that was an earned title.  99% of the time, i did not get a response back  [:-]
 
So then i became leery of those who threw that title around so flippantly.  A simple query like 'How did you beome a Master?"  or  "How did you earn that title?"  yielded either no answer, or quite rude responses.  i will still challenge the title but i think that Rover really summed it up when he said "But by far the largest body of "Masters" are those practicing self-masturbatory adulation, in which they bestow the title upon themselves in an amusing effort to appear more important than they are."
 
BTW....i still wonder why CM hasn't added that as an option for the guys here.  The females get to check off if they are a sub or slave but the guys can choose Dom, but not Master.  i wonder why that is?  Now that would be an interesting option to see  [&:]
 
DG





sub4hire -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 6:08:45 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I saw this in a profile and I took it that the person is splitting hairs. They state that a Dom is not a true Master. Dom and Master are just titles. Does the word Master sound more majestic than Dom. I think that they both serve the same function. I think that submissives serve either with just as much pashion. Im here to learn so if Im wrong please enlighten me.


Going on a different tangent than those already here.  Myself, I see a master as being someone who is in a solid relationship with their significant other.  They have sort of mastered that person.
A dom, also seeks a relationship or at least you hope so.  Yet they haven't gotten to that point yet.
Submissives would serve them all with the same passion?  I don't think so.  I think a submissive would serve their master with much more passion as it is a life choice they have made to be with that person.  It has gone deeper than the lust filled relationship all relationships start as.
Of course I also agree it is merely a word..and up for anyone's definition.




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:17:21 AM)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_605383/mpage_1/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#606932
Ms vs Ds

http://www.collarchat.com/m_486719/mpage_1/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#486891
from dom to master

http://www.collarchat.com/m_271859/mpage_2/key_master%252Cdom/tm.htm#272880
dom or master

Master vs Dom




charismagirrl -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:30:46 AM)

i haven't had enough coffee yet so my brain is very slow right now, but... From what i understood about these words was that similar to

All slaves are submissives but not all submissives are slaves.

That...All Masters are Dominants but all Dominants aren't Masters.

i understood that a Master has a slave (s) and a Dominant who isn't a Master has a sub (s)

Is this correct? Or another of the list of things that are difficult to define across the board?




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:32:20 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: charismagirrl
Is this correct? Or another of the list of things that are difficult to define across the board?

The latter.  Some people will agree with what you said, and some people will disagree with everything you said.  Any definition you can come up with, I could present people who claim the opposite is true for them.




juliaoceania -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:37:30 AM)

I do not care what he tells me to call him, it does not change the way I feel about him or my submission to him. Words are often ineffective to convey a feeling or an energy anyways.




thetammyjo -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:38:40 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

I saw this in a profile and I took it that the person is splitting hairs. They state that a Dom is not a true Master. Dom and Master are just titles. Does the word Master sound more majestic than Dom. I think that they both serve the same function. I think that submissives serve either with just as much pashion. Im here to learn so if Im wrong please enlighten me.


I think dominant can be a personality trait... master isn't a personality trait but it can be a degree you earn in graduate school.

Both can be roles we take with another person. What those roles entail and mean depends on the person.




LadyOunce -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 7:43:05 AM)

I would like to think a lot depends on how the person came into the lifestyle. Some "traditions" hold to titles more strictly and, as with paganism and witchcraft, there are some that believe you can not hold a title until you have earned the right through practice, initiation and the like. That said:

Most these days bestow it on themselves, take themselves too seriously and are more hung up on how they are perceived than how they present themselves.

Myself, personally, I see Master and Mistress as a much more personal term than I do Dom/me. I would refer to any that present themselves in a dominant position as a Dom/me but rarely do I use Master or Mistress for any that I don't know well enough to know how they carry and present themselves.




Lordandmaster -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 8:03:58 AM)

Generally this is true--with the important exception of that universally admired fellow with the screen name "Lordandmaster."

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

But by far the largest body of "Masters" are those practicing self-masturbatory adulation, in which they bestow the title upon themselves in an amusing effort to appear more important than they are. 




LadyHugs -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 8:11:43 AM)

Dear Dnomyar, Rover, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I do have to agree with Rover's post on the differences between Master and Dominant and the brief summary flow of how Master and Dominant came to past.
 
Being introduced to the lifestyle in the 1970's; there were no titles of "Dominant/submissive."  It was a state of being.  Although the vein of the lifestyle I took, was more towards the Gay Leathermen overseas as a military dependant; the lifestyle was totally different from American Gay Leathermen.  But, I must also mention that there were no support and education groups back then.  It was only word of mouth and a letter of recommendation and an individual vouching for you and your character.  Things we take for granted in the USA, they could not--so, things were still carefully and discreetly done.
 
I also will agree, that the philosophy that I am 'familiar' with from my early exposures to the lifestyle was more M/s then Bondage and or fetish.
 
In addition, I will also agree with Rover; that when heterosexuals became more 'visible' and 'involved,' as the Gay Leather community really were the brinksmanship to 'public acceptance/tolerance' there were some who did not wish to take the same approach, to include protocol, practices and 'roughness' that Leathermen seemingly was excluding but, to that defense--they didn't tolerate wankers or twinkies, femme men and such.  So, I do understand the 'why.'
 
As for my personal journey, I earned my leathers from my peers and my title of "Master" was bestowed overseas in a small leather community of English/American speaking members that mingled with the host countries overseas.  I met my military serving slave there in the 1980s.  When returning to the USA, I earned my leathers again within the Gay Leather Community, as I was an associate member of the International Trident's Association and my association was voted on and approved in Baltimore, MD.  The President of the Baltimore's Chapter was my sponsor as well as bestowing my leather and title as Master.  One of the original Gay Leathermen title holders, to which the title no longer exists, as it has be changed into a different title, has bestowed me with the title of "Master," and see me as a Master in their eyes.  Other Gay Leathermen to whom I hold fond affections for have also recognized me and address me as "Master."  But, in the 1980's the heterosexual leather community wasn't so keen on calling a woman "Master."  So, I straddled two communities and their standards.
Its not as bad now days and it isn't as ugly as it once was.
 
Mind you, I am not Lesbian or even Bi-sexual.  I'm Heterosexual.  But, I will say this in the most gentle of terms; I wish that the Heterosexual Leather community was more gracious to females who identified as a Master or Mistress.  I've been treated more tenderly and loving by the Gay Leathermen overseas and in the USA, then the heterosexual community.  Although I am very forgiving--I don't forget my memories and or experiences.  That is why I am an extremely difficult 'fit' when it comes to finding a slave. 
 
I wish to also add, that the Gay Leathermen seemingly still push hard to give back to the community.  It also needs to be said, that before there were support and education groups; the Gay Leathermen had their supports through Biker groups and associations.  Their seeds of encouragements to the heterosexual and Lesbians have borne good fruits.  We're all a product of growth and accomplishments through inspiration and a sense of community.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
 
 




ExtremeOwnerIL -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 8:24:30 AM)

To LadyHugs:

I very much enjoyed your response and I think you hit upon something very key and important that is missing from the het community (at least the majority of the local community that I formerly took part in) - giving back. Truly giving back, not ego boosting or doing things to boost one's own "status", but truly being part of a community.

The very best thing I took part in was the resurrection of a local leather MC club - done in the traditional ways of pledging and awarding of leathers. If it weren't for the lack of time, that is the only thing I would have remained with. To this day, I still regret not being a part of it.

I think if more "Masters" were those who had given back to the community, rather than tacked on a title to their "online persona", the community would be a much better thing.

Regards to you,
EO




Archer -> RE: Master/Dom difference (11/1/2006 8:37:06 AM)

That resurgence is not confined to your area EO there are pockets all around the country where folks are trying to restart the tradition of earning leathers. I am working doing my part to bring it back locally as well as regionally. The trouble is the concept of earning leathers while talked about alot in the het community was not as easily accessed by them as it was by gay leathermen. Not knowing what they needed to do to earn leathers many just chose not to bother or to claim earning them through some unknown and unreachable group.

Online you can find a few references to earning leathers but they are pretty vauge and seem contradictory until you realize that earning leathers was club specific how you earned them varied in detail from club to club and region to region.

I was presented with my Master's Cap at Southeast Leatherfest 2005 in the back room of the Atlanta Eagle. I can tell you it is humbling and still a little uneasy to hear folks use the honorific.




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