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getting naked for the first time - 2/3/2005 12:08:54 PM

Sirssweet

Posts: 26
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline

I am new in the lfiestyle but have been blessed to meet a wonderful Dom. I am chubby; he is not. We will be getting together soon and I admit to being more nervous about showing him my naked body than I am about the flogger and cuffs. He swears he is enchanted with me and my body will not offend him.

Has anyone ever had "bodfy embarrassement" adn hwo did you deal with it. Thanks!

Post #: 1

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/3/2005 12:33:06 PM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

Sirssweet,
Telling you not to worry is akin to telling a first time bungee jumper; "Don't worry no one has died - yet!"

Assuming you have been honest and he knows what to expect when he sees you, trust that he is telling you the truth. Trust is the most important aspect of a lifestyle relationship, and your concern is a good place to begin to have trust in him.

Besides, the most important part of the body you are bringing to the meeting is your mind. Most Doms are more interested in what's between a subs ears then any other part of their body.

Have fun, enjoy the nervous rush of energy at the thought of losing your lifestyle 'virginity'.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 2

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/3/2005 1:55:21 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

This article and replies may help you feel better about your body:

body image

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 3

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/3/2005 1:57:01 PM

Jeshy

Posts: 8
Joined: 12/10/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirssweet

I am new in the lfiestyle but have been blessed to meet a wonderful Dom. I am chubby; he is not. We will be getting together soon and I admit to being more nervous about showing him my naked body than I am about the flogger and cuffs. He swears he is enchanted with me and my body will not offend him.

Has anyone ever had "bodfy embarrassement" adn hwo did you deal with it. Thanks!

Ohhh, I'll be getting together with my Domme as well. And I've been worrying about the same thing as well. But she assured me that she thinks I'm beautiful and all that jazz. Mercnbeth is right, just trust him. I trust my Domme! Whee!

Now I'm just worried about not being able to please her...but that's a whole other topic.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 4

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/4/2005 10:17:02 PM

rubytuesday

Posts: 180
Joined: 10/22/2004
Status: offline

Sirssweet - i know exactly how you feel and the only way around it is to just do it - I found that by being honest online and saying hey Im not small and petite and these are some pics of me and if you dont like them thats fine - well it did make it so much eaiser - in fact the Dom i played with for awhile didnt seem to be turned off by the fact I am a BBW and it certainly didnt make for any difficulty in play. I did struggle when he told me i was sexy and all that sort of thing but then thats my own personal hangup actually beleiving it for myself.

Id love to know how you get on - and good luck - you will be fine - if you need any reassurance please contact me.

smiles
ruby

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 5

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/4/2005 10:23:29 PM

lookingwithin04

Posts: 48
Joined: 7/8/2004
Status: offline

I am also chubby, I always have been since child hood and getting naked for someone new never gets easier from person to person.

I have been with Master for a year and a half, we see each other ever month and a half or so for anywhere from 2 weeks to over a month, and it's hard to take my clothes off that first night no matter how use to it i am and no matter how many times i've done it before. It's hard and the only way i see of dealing with it is loosing a bit of weight. I tend to cover myself up when naked, hiding my chubbyness but when we are not scening i am permitted to wear clothes and i appreciate and am thankful for that because i think that this will be an issue that i as well as many others in the lifestyle will always have a problem with.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 6

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 12:52:36 AM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

You need to keep in mind that not everyone's idea of beauty is skinny. A lot of men prefer BBW. Some men seek out SSBBW. You are someone's idea of a prize. Never forget that. Do not ever let yourself fall into the Madison ave trap of judging your worth by your clothes size. Your worth comes from the type of person you are and how you live your life.

This lifestyle is about trust. This is your first act of trust.. believing him when he tells you he is enchanted by you and wishes to see and use your body. Quit second guessing him. He knows what he wants. What he wants is you. *smiles*

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 7

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 5:34:17 AM

typesgirl

Posts: 102
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

Everyone has given such good advice. Let me just add that after feeling the same way with my Master, having unveiled my body to him I've never felt so beautiful. It did take me a little while to learn to accept that He liked what He saw but once i did it was so freeing.
I feel worshipped and adored, sexy and attractive. But i wouldn't feel those things if i hadn't taken the risk. It's well worth it.
Good luck

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 8

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 6:38:26 AM

onceburned

Posts: 2117
Joined: 1/4/2005
From: Iowa
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: typesgirl
But i wouldn't feel those things if i hadn't taken the risk. It's well worth it.

Yes, absolutely. I was very self-conscious of my body's imperfections and felt a certain dread about revealing it. But doing so, and gaining the acceptance and the approval of my dominant was very liberating. It was an anxiety lifted off my back and I felt better about myself as well.

I think you will find it to be a healthy and a helpful thing.

(in reply to typesgirl)

Post #: 9

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 9:12:30 AM

softysub

Posts: 101
Joined: 10/20/2004
Status: offline

I am a BBW sub and it was the same thing for me the first time my Dom saw me naked. But i was honest with Him so He knew what to expect and He was great about it. He always undresses me now and the way He does it, i dont feel shy.

So its like Mercnbeth said, if you have been honest with Him, then things will be just fine.

Have fun and enjoy

softysub

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 10

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 3:34:21 PM

Shayna

Posts: 205
Joined: 1/16/2005
Status: offline

quote:

You are someone's idea of a prize

Beautifully put :)

(in reply to softysub)

Post #: 11

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 4:49:19 PM

velvetvixen

Posts: 378
Joined: 1/19/2004
Status: offline

If He is enchanted with your body, then you should not be ashamed of it either.

It IS that simple.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 12

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/5/2005 5:37:03 PM

strongnsubmissiv

Posts: 197
Joined: 9/8/2004
Status: offline

I know exactly how you feel sweet. At one of the few play parties i've been to, the Domme i served wanted me practically naked for the entire evening. Although it was a little easier to deal with, because it was at her request and i had no say, the notion that i'd have to reveal myself to others i did and didn't know was nerve wracking indeed. I'll admit it's something that i still wrestle with.

Here's something i think about alot, and it often helps....

If you've ever been to a party, have you ever noticed somone larger than you, confidently flaunting a half naked body? I know when i see that i say to myself, "good for that person, they are having such a good time, i wish i had that kind of confidence." It's almost like being self concious about dancing in a crowded room because you think everyone is looking at you. The truth is, have you ever looked at someone, who couldn't dance, or who was half naked and a bit on the large size and been repulsed by what you saw? I know i haven't. It's funny how we seem to always ask ourselves "Oh my God, what will people think of me?", when honestly nobody is noticing what we think is the most noticable. We're our own worst critict.

People won't remember you for how bad you "think" you look, but they'll certainly remember you for how much fun you're having.

(still doesn't mean the next time i'm collared, cuffed and half naked in a public place that i won't be sweating bullets... so you're not alone.. lol)

sns

_____________________________

*** Strong and submissive are not contradictions ***

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 13

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/7/2005 9:57:39 AM

liltxsubby

Posts: 328
Joined: 11/18/2004
From: TX
Status: offline

i had posted a response to this a few days back but it seems to be one of the many hit by the thread/email muncher so i'll post again.

I had this same problem the first time i was to get naked. It might help if you get a webcam and let him see you naked through it first. Somehow it's not quite as frightening when he's not actually standing in the same room (at least it was for me). My reasoning was, if he sees on wecam (which does not paint the prettiest picture) and still wants to see the real thing live and in person, then i'm just too hard on myself (who, me? hahaha). Now i sometimes wonder what i was worried about If he likes the way i look, why worry what anyone elses thinks? Besides, as he says "more cushion for the pushing", and him grabbing my hips and pulling me closer certainly never gets any complaints from me.

_____________________________

I'm Japan and Godzilla has taken over.

Laugh with them, or let them laugh at you.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 14

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/7/2005 10:32:32 AM

panthergoddess

Posts: 93
Joined: 1/11/2005
From: Bessemer City, NC USA
Status: offline

I went through the same fears...I really thing we all do in some form or another.

I found that blindfolding me works rather well in that situation.

_____________________________

"No good deed goes unpunished."

(in reply to liltxsubby)

Post #: 15

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/10/2005 6:37:21 AM

Sirssweet

Posts: 26
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline

To all those who were so kind to respond to my desperate question: let me tell you that my first encounter with my Dom was better than anything i could ever have expected. he was truthful yet kind and assured me that me and my body were "just right". But i want to thank all who provided words of wisdom and comfort. Bless each of you.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 16

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/10/2005 6:37:33 AM

Sirssweet

Posts: 26
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline

To all those who were so kind to respond to my desperate question: let me tell you that my first encounter with my Dom was better than anything i could ever have expected. he was truthful yet kind and assured me that me and my body were "just right". But i want to thank all who provided words of wisdom and comfort. Bless each of you.

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 17

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/10/2005 7:36:51 AM

slavedesires

Posts: 669
Joined: 3/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirssweet

I am new in the lfiestyle but have been blessed to meet a wonderful Dom. I am chubby; he is not. We will be getting together soon and I admit to being more nervous about showing him my naked body than I am about the flogger and cuffs. He swears he is enchanted with me and my body will not offend him.

Has anyone ever had "bodfy embarrassement" adn hwo did you deal with it. Thanks!

It's always hard sweet. Trust his words, his trust in you, his respect for you.
i found out later He was just as nervous, but in the fact that He thought i would not like Him and come to realize He was not the superhero most girls think Doms are.

Enjoy and have fun!!

Master Damian's shy
(who is also "chubby" and He continues to encourage my exercise and diet regime, which i began before i even met Him)

_____________________________

i speak only my personal opinion, sometimes O/ours.

"i am the keeper of fragile things and i have kept what is indisolvable."
....the greatest gift.....vulnerability

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 18

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/10/2005 7:27:40 PM

subbiejenn

Posts: 631
Joined: 7/12/2004
Status: offline

I haven't read all the replies to this yet but this is my thoughts :)

Don't worry about it! Noone is perfect, we all have our flaws and not everyone thinks skinny is beautiful.

i for one like BIG Men -- so the perfect GQ model is nice looking for me but not who i would want as a Dom/Lover.

Just be you and i am sure He will love it :) and if not then it wasn't meant to be anyway --

Hugs!
~jenn

_____________________________

~Subspace is my perfect paradise vacation from busy-mind... blessed be to the Dominant who can stamp my ticket there.~

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away"

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 19

RE: getting naked for the first time - 2/10/2005 7:28:51 PM

subbiejenn

Posts: 631
Joined: 7/12/2004
Status: offline

see as always i am late!!

glad it all worked out :)

wish you the best always

~jenn~

_____________________________

~Subspace is my perfect paradise vacation from busy-mind... blessed be to the Dominant who can stamp my ticket there.~

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away"

(in reply to Sirssweet)

Post #: 20

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