RE: getting naked for the first time (Full Version)

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lionheart67 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/3/2005 11:07:44 AM)

I think that it is a universal issue alot of us deal with female and male.I am a male and about 40# overwieght it bothers me as well.But there is someone for us all and I am not looking for Pam Anderson to come through my door anytime soon (would be nice though).

But just remember this always "We are always the hardest on ourselves".
Sometimes we worry so much and its really about nothing.

Good luck to you and all of your adventures.



subversiveone -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/4/2005 6:20:05 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: chuk451

u might tremble, but u must strip, and then show ur fat ugly body to him, including ur asshole.


Wow, i think i can already see YOURS ;)



Hiskneelingpet -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/4/2005 8:07:46 PM)


Sirssweet

I too had/have such insecurities...but it is our Master/Mistress who can put a lovely end to it.
My Master gave me one response to my talk of "imperfections" I dared not continue my self pity again...blissfully thankful to him taking control of the situation.

"You have no imperfections and I forbid you to say so"

Thank you Master...



jennel -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/5/2005 2:39:39 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirssweet

I am new in the lfiestyle but have been blessed to meet a wonderful Dom. I am chubby; he is not. We will be getting together soon and I admit to being more nervous about showing him my naked body than I am about the flogger and cuffs. He swears he is enchanted with me and my body will not offend him.

Has anyone ever had "bodfy embarrassement" adn hwo did you deal with it. Thanks!


Sirssweet:

I had the same experience. My Dom loves for me to be naked before Him at all times. It was very disarming and scary at first, but I am most comfortable now. Even before I bared all to Him, we discussed the issue and He helped me form an excersize and diet program where I will be more comfortable with my body for Him. It also emphasizes His powerful role. I am doing it for Him and no one else. It's a very motivating factor.

W/we took baby steps. Little by little, I was wearing less and less. That way it didn't feel like such a huge leap for me to be completely clothed to completely naked.

Basically it comes down to choice. If He is supportive/loving then why not? It is always good to please Him, in my opinion. :)

I hope it works out well for you.

jennel



roughleather -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/6/2005 10:17:43 AM)

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.



harmony3709 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/6/2005 9:48:44 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.


What's the excuse for a "dom" being crass then? Oh yes, that's right, lack of class.


Blessed be,
harmony



jennel -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 2:10:28 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.


Honestly, some Doms may prefer a little more meat on the bones. I know that I don't want a super skinny Master.

I think it may a matter of preference and you're lacking maturity to accept that. :)



littleone35 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 1:14:42 PM)

Well i alway heard it is mor cusion for the pushing. If a Master had a bbw and he is happy with her then wwho is to say it is wrong. I alway say different strokes for different folks.


quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.




Sweeticing -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 1:36:37 PM)

It is very difficult to show your self sometimes. we are so good at concealing the bad spots with clothes. Often it helps to chat with the person and let them know how hard it is for you to do this and hopefully they can make it easier . I remember the first time I had to do it he was sitting in a chair and told me to get undressed the room was slighty dim so that helps but it took me all of 35 min and some whinning to get it done. He never hurried me and praised me when i finnaly done it. He then told me he knew that was hard for me to do.

I hope you have someone like that. Other wise I have found that if you go quickly and act like its no big deal it goes by easier. most people dont just stare at you they go on to what they want to do and you relax and have fun.
Just remember just because you see the flaws and are self concious this person really may like all those special curves. Everyone has a preference I know I like tall husky guys with fuzzy bellies [sm=tongue.gif]



kc692 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 1:41:51 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.



Don't know for sure, because profile specs don't indicate it, picture does though. but to me, looks like you need to be next to the sub, working on that middle, hoss............can a stairmaster teach you some class?????



Pyro -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 7:21:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.



How enlightening. I would like to ask all you people something. Do you think he would stand naked in front of anything including a mirror? And this is probably the most submissive attention he has gotten in a while. We all know how you fall for class acts like that. Unless of course it was meant as a joke and not actually a concious effort to debase the thoughts shown here.

As in all things it is the job of the Dominant or Master to work and help his or her's submissive or slave to be comfortable in all things. It is their job to measure thru communication just what this takes. As it was stated earlier you are not allowed imperfection. I must compliment the Master of HisKneelingPet. A wise and powerful thing to say and correct. Unless you have a really lazy Dominant or Master. Isn't that what you are wanting? To allow someone the power to take this away from you?



EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 8:04:54 PM)

In a sense I actually agree with him- if a sub is insecure about her weight, and it IS over healthy ranges, there's no excuse for the dom not to work to help the situation by getting the sub to lose weight.

I also don't believe that the dom has to do what the sub does. Now, if the dom really was obese and yucky one might say that perhaps he had a bit of a skewed notion of how things are perceived, but generally, if the Owner tells me he wants me to lose weight and be healthier, there is and should not be ANY need or reason for him to do the same.

Ds stands for double standards.



kc692 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 8:30:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Pyro

quote:

ORIGINAL: roughleather

There's no excuse for a fat sub. He needs to put you on a Stairmaster and stand behind you with a singletail.



How enlightening. I would like to ask all you people something. Do you think he would stand naked in front of anything including a mirror? And this is probably the most submissive attention he has gotten in a while. We all know how you fall for class acts like that. Unless of course it was meant as a joke and not actually a concious effort to debase the thoughts shown here.



I personally do not think it was a joke since his profile is only one sentence long. I think we have seen his intellectual being in all its full glory.. and in answer to your question about being in front, why do you think he wants to stand behind, lol? It just galls me when I see a "so-called" dominant acting so rudely to those that we other dominants treasure. There is no excuse for that, but, I don't know why I'm ranting, ya'll seem to be taking his words more rationally than I....maybe you realized before me he's not worth the energy to think about????



chuk451 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/7/2005 11:07:41 PM)

I started to write u a cruel letter.....but i remembered someing in joining that thats not allowed.....if u'd want to get it let me know, i'll send it



SeekingMastery -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/8/2005 1:12:48 AM)

Your concern has always been a concern of mine regardless of the situation. I think honestly it depends on how you feel naked in the presence of that person which you have never done before.

I wish I could say I can tell you how he will respond but I've had various experiences. I've had a fiancee and lover of 5 years say to my face that I was "too fat to f*ck" and I've had one night stands where the person has desired my body so much, I was almost worn out! I've wanted to cover up while they wrap their arms around me and tell how fantastic my body was, how soft my skin was, and almost suffocated me with their desire. There is no consistency, that's what makes us individuals.

Wait until you see how you feel with him. Try not to make assumptions (which is hard I know!) And regardless of how that person feels, continue to love everything about you, the good and the bad.

I have never been thin, but I hold my head high and carry myself with as much confidence as I can. And to be perfectly honest, I get more attention than my tiny thin friends. It might be the huge breasts, or the meaty thighs, or the voluptuous ass, but whatever it is, I make it work for me.

Of course there are things I would like to change about myself - there is no one in this world who doesn't think that way.

However, when you get naked, be proud, embrace your body and flaunt your assets, and once you do that, he won't be thinking about anything else than how master you, body, mind and spirit.

And once that happens, you won't be thinking about anything else as well....apart from enjoying youself....and your body!

"The ultimate desire is to be ultimately desired."



magiqnapa -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/29/2005 10:35:13 AM)

Honey,
don't be embarassed about your body. I have had subs that were very large, and I didn't care. I care about what is inside my subs head and what his body can do for me, not how it looks. Take pride in yourself.....good grooming, dress up for your Master or Mistress in something that makes you feel sexy the first time you meet with them, ect. I would take a big maybe over-weight guy over some skinny little stick I am going to break in half with the flogger any day!



cheryl707 -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/30/2005 9:06:24 AM)

i would really like to chat with u about being a sub



softandshy -> RE: getting naked for the first time (6/30/2005 4:26:46 PM)

Wonderful thread!

i am so glad that things worked out well for you, sweet.

i'm very new myself and have yet to do this, but i can tell you that the worry is universal. i'm actually slim bordering on "feed that girl" and yet i'm concerned about what the Mistress may think of me as well. Will i be tight enough (in musculature, i'm sure i'll hear about this comment, :) ), strong enough for Her? Am i proportionate (you read about this a lot in the profiles and it does make you wonder if most of us are shaped like monkeys rather than humans or some such, :D )? And then i've wondered if the fact that i am scarred will get in the way even when i did tell Her about it. It's always something, i think, most of us are trained to mistrust our bodies from childhood.

The blindfold sounds like a good idea, though i will confess to a great deal of curiosity about the Mistress also. No, it wouldn't bother me if the person i was with did not have a "perfect" or "classical" body. i haven't actually ever seen anyone that did. There was a reason Pygmalion sculpted the ideal woman, his ideal woman. Past experience has shown me this, those you love (even in the heat of a moment) are beautiful. i understand this clearly now in regard to how i think of others, but i still have questions about what She may think.

However, i have thought about what the Mistress might be thinking about Herself also. It can't be easy to be the Dom/me either. What will the sub/slave be thinking about You? Here is someone with some rather high expectations of You and now You're in a place that actually makes You vulnerable to critique also, even if it is only in his/her head. Actually, that may make it worse as You may have to work, or at least ask, to find out what the sub thinks of Your body. The sub, on the other hand, will know if he/she has displeased with the way he/she looks quite quickly, i imagine. :) i think it would take a great deal of self confidence for that not to occur to a Dom/me at all.

Be well, sweet, and thank you.



dominmd -> RE: getting naked for the first time (7/1/2005 3:36:41 PM)

A good dom and/or sub will make their subbie or dom feel good about themselves regardless of imperfection. I dated a vanilla girl from my childhood. Skinny as a rail, I could see bones. I was more afraid of hurting her than anything else just by having vanilla sex. From then on I liked girls that were healthy sized, toned, but no bones visable when her clothes came off. I have my own way of breaking the ice when it comes to taking off the clothes for the first time. Both taking our clothing off each other, and getting into a hot bath or shower. You learn each other's bodies, it is more intimate. It says to a woman be she into BDSM or vanilla "I like what I see". And lets face it, if you did not care for one another the clothes would not get close to coming off.

As for me, I am 200 pounds down from 300 from a year and a half ago. I did it for my health not for anyone else. Granted I get more looks now than 2 years ago. I am targeted to 165 pounds, I will get there on my own. I carry just a belly and I need muscle toning, but if someone really is into me then this does not matter. I love people for who they are, for that brain and heart they have. Looks are superficial when it comes down to it.

Another example, I met a woman I really have to come to like. She is georgeous in my eyes, wonderful personality, intelligent, etc etc. Well I always took her to be my height maybe a bit taller. Not long ago, when I saw her at work but she was shorter than I thought, I liked her even more. She is still attractive in my eyes because looks are not everything. I feel that I connect with her on a lot of things like past experiences, likes and dislikes and life in general. And I have only to let my shyness go to do something about it, and ask her out already. I may be more of a dom, but dom's can still be nervous too.

My point is this, everyone has their likes and dislikes. We find each other by happenstance, luck and fate. When it happens you will know it. Be yourself, that is all anybody should, could, would ever ask.



Knot4YOU -> RE: getting naked for the first time (7/2/2005 4:34:35 PM)

The first time i took it all off for my SIR i was scared.. my body was no where near what i had desired it to me... Pealing my clothes off only increased my desire to please him... i struggled over the next year to lose weight and it worked... Tell you SIR that you desire HIS help if you dont consider you body to be up to par.... Having what you put in your mouth controled can be a ture turn on....



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