quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave
I wonder if she ever questioned the genuineness of your feelings for your new master?

Absolutely, and quite openly.

Here is the link to the post where you can read what I wrote and what Cariad responded with:
http://www.collarchat.com/m_669579/mpage_1/key_sister/tm.htm#670228
When master seems pathetic...

quote:


Is your realtionship also online only? Have you met yet? It wasnt too clear, it sounds like he is apart from you, but I am not clear on whether or not u have been together etc.

They haven't been together yet, and I regard their relationship with high suspicion and scrutiny.  Cariad also has a lot more history on the collarme boards so I know a lot more about her personality and how she processes things.

I also regarded Katy's relationship and Julia's relationship and Owned's relationship and Pita's relationship with high suspicion at first.  The good news is with them that they've all proven in time that they simply are who they are and have shown in every way that they are more secure, happy, stable, aware and fulfilled than they have ever been before.

Whether the same will hold true for Cariad, you, or even myself, we can only see in time.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedSavageSlave

For what its worth..

you seem awfully defensive about your situation for someone who doesnt feel you need to defend what you are doing.

quote:

ORIGINAL: babysburnin

Did you agree simply to be someone else's sub (not alone)?  Then the answer is yes. 

I have never understood how people can move from one relationship to another without taking time to reflect and grow between.  ( I take WAY more time than most - so I'm not judging.) 

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I've pretty muched moved from one relationship to another all my life (and I havent' had THAT many relationships)..well cept for one period of my life I spent in soul searching and stuff like that, I've always had a partner.

I met Master online 3 weeks after my husband died, we have been married for nearly 2 years now and still going hot and strong.

Different strokes for different folks.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave

I am also very weary of the whole rebound guy thing and shared those concerns with him, his reply to that was that we are always rebounding from someone, just some of us rebound quicker than others. LOL

quote:

ORIGINAL: babysburnin

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave

I am also very weary of the whole rebound guy thing and shared those concerns with him, his reply to that was that we are always rebounding from someone, just some of us rebound quicker than others. LOL

That's what HE said - what do You say?  That's part of my point - I wait until I'm not rebounding from another (so my head is "on straight"). 

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave

Is this too soon?

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave
BTW if you check the thread you will see someone did the same as me - almost - they met someone online 4 days after one relationship ended and had an online relationship for 3 months before meeting face to face - so I aint so unusual!

You're absolutely right, people repeating their dysfunctional relationship mistakes and going on the rebound with someone they find "safe" are extremely common.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SamKeithsslave

Well for what its worth, I feel as though I have been attacked and no, I dont feel as though I should have to defend myself,

then dont

but I feel as though I have been placed in a situation where I must defend myself.

defend yourself against what? some online persons view of your life? Does online really seem THAT real to you?

The alternative is to say nothing, but unfortunately in todays society to remain silent is all to often taken as compliance to what is being said about one.

This is a discussion board.. not society. No one here knows who you are nor do we for the most part care who you are.. you came and asked a question. Your situation was questionable even to yourself. So why get so upset that not everyone sees it the way you do? If you truly thought everyone would..why did you ask the question in the first place? (please bear in mind these are all kind of rhetorical questions as I already suspect you are going to get very upset in answering them)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedSavageSlave

but I feel as though I have been placed in a situation where I must defend myself.

defend yourself against what? some online persons view of your life? Does online really seem THAT real to you?
 
In my experiences of online forums, yes, they are real. On the few other forums I have and still do belong to, I meet with and have become close and good friends with many members. Those people are REAL, but they all started off as just words on a screen.


The alternative is to say nothing, but unfortunately in todays society to remain silent is all to often taken as compliance to what is being said about one.

This is a discussion board.. not society.
 
Then what are you here for? Discussion? Why? If..............
 
No one here knows who you are nor do we for the most part care who you are
 
So whats the point? Why are you here? Or are you saying its just me that nobody "for the most part" cares about? If so then why should anyone new join?
 
.. you came and asked a question. Your situation was questionable even to yourself. So why get so upset that not everyone sees it the way you do?
 
<HUGE EXASPERATING SIGH COS YOU AINT GETTING IT> I was not upset because people did not see things as I did. A number of people stated that they believed the time frame was too short, that was fine, I dont believe I responded to any of those, so thats not what 'upset' me. My objection was to the way some assumed to know what I was thinking and feeling. And tried to belittle my feelings etc by claiming they could not be real etc etc. As I have said before I would never presume to tell someone that their feelings could not be genuine and THIS, is what has annoyed me. I really wish people would get all the facts before making incorrect comments.
 
If you truly thought everyone would..why did you ask the question in the first place? (please bear in mind these are all kind of rhetorical questions as I already suspect you are going to get very upset in answering them)
 
No, not upset, simply exasperated that you just dont get it. And again, for the record I corrected the misconception some had that I was specifically directing the question to myself in posts 6 and 7 of this thread. It was a general question, granted I did not make it clear initially, but had you followed the thread you would see what my real intent for asking was and we wouldnt have to be having this discussion now.
God forbid I should start a discussion on a discussion forum about how long people took to decide whether or not to accept a Dom asking them to be theirs.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
Hey there watch it buckarette - - that was me she was talking about!  (and it was 2 months online, not three)

quote:

God forbid I should start a discussion on a discussion forum about how long people took to decide whether or not to accept a Dom asking them to be theirs.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:

God forbid I should start a discussion on a discussion forum about how long people took to decide whether or not to accept a Dom asking them to be theirs.

Well you have that option.  But don't be surprised if such a thread turns into name calling before it dies.  There would be answers all over the place.  Some people decide before they meet in real time, sometimes it works out, other times they come here and cry to us because they rushed and knew better, and were "used", but didn't listen to that little ache in their gut.

quote:

ORIGINAL: RedSavageSlave

<laffin> ok.. I surrender.. mostly because I dont understand what it is you expected to get from this.

That makes two of us. I was, and still are not sure what I can expect. One thing I know for sure is that I didnt expect to have the genuine feelings J have second guessed.

I do find it curious though that you state you are on other discussion boards that are real time friends and yet you posted this question amongst all of us strangers for an answer. Have you posted this on the boards where people DO in fact know you?

I dont believe it to be worthwhile to ask non-doms, non-subs etc a general question about dom/sub relationships. What will they know? You dont buy meat at a bakery. Most of my friends know my lifestyle choice and although they accept it, few understand the choice.

As far as your question of why anyone should join here.. well its kind of simple and I am surprised that you have to even ask.

That was my rhetorial question [:D]
 
Having said all of that.. none of us are perfect.. LA certainly isnt and she would be the first to say that to you <in fact I think she did in this thread> however, she has been on here long enough to see alot of situations that are very similar and has seen the outcome of them. THAT is what she bases her answers on.

I think thats the point. She mentioned 4 individuals whose relationships she initially said she was highly suspect etc of and that over time saw that they ended up being fufilling etc. So if she is basing her opinion of my genuineness in my current and previous relationships on those similar situations it doesnt make sense that she would say what she did.
 
And her personality is "She calls it as she sees it"..

Guess what? So do I. But I draw the line at second guessing peoples feelings.
 
Most here kind of admire that about her.

I'd admire her more if she didnt jump in and make assumptions and asked questions and took a little time to clarify situations before making the outspoken comments she does.
 
Sooo ... consider yourself indoctrinated to the boards..take what you want from it and leave the rest here. Join in on other peoples discussions and questions as you so desire and hopefully it will be with a view to actually help.

I have already taken that advice and joined in on a couple of other discussions.

Either way... we are all simply who we are... your choice is simply to take us or leave us. Hopefully we have not scared you away.

Scared me away, not yet. Though I must admit I am in two minds as to what to do.

Good luck to you!

Thanks, you too.