Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RUDE submissives


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RUDE submissives Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 3:00:45 PM   
MasterDonfromPA


Posts: 24
Joined: 12/26/2004
Status: offline 		can anyone explain to me the excessive rudeness of SO called Submissives on any site...

I posted a Very well written email To over 100 people Seeking what I wanted Here, and As of this Point almost 50 people have recived them

I got 4 no thank you replies

and thats all, Does ANYONE understand that is simple respect and courtesy?

I read and reply to Every email sent to me
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 3:11:41 PM   
Atavist


Posts: 124
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline 		I couple of things come to mind.

Firstly, I hope those 100 emails were written individually and not a standard (read spam) message. If it was some kind of boilerplate message, you shouldn't be surprised. Apparently there are alot of people doing that. If you can't write a letter directed to an individual, why should they bother to respond?

Secondly, its a matter of numbers. The men outnumber the women (by what ratio I don't know but its probably high). Consequently, many submissives (particularly female) get alot of email and it seems that, for reasons that you may not agree with, many simply don't respond to people they have no interest in. It may be rude, you may not like it, but thats just how it goes. The path of least resistance, etc.

Lastly, on every medium (web/IRC/IM) there are players, pretenders and window shoppers.

If your serious, I suggest you be prepared for a long slog until you find what you're looking for. It's a process of natural selection, those that are serious and can adapt to the environment have better odds.

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 3:48:02 PM   
match2u


Posts: 131
Joined: 11/15/2004
Status: offline



first of all sorry for...

but like said before - players, pretenders etc exist - thats a fact

be sure the the subs has often the same problem with "rude Doms/Masters"

as "get on your knees bitch" is a common expression often seemed in the first note you get - smile -

i totally agree with you about the point of respect - and just talking for myself i always try to send a note - at least - no thanks...

but...

respect is something seems so easy to write (typing - and most profiles at least deal/claim with it) but so hard to live by - for a lot of....

that is life - at least a part of

hug

petra



(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:04:03 PM   
DeadofKnight


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/2/2004
Status: offline 		First, I agree that they may seem rude. But, as Atavist has said, these girls/women get so much mail I am sure it can be burdensome. Having to sift through it all would have to be a labor of love, or the seeking of it. I commend those that do actually take the time to sift thru the mess and take their time to write back.

If you do not meet what they are looking for, well, they are probably not one you would really want anyway. I don't like it when my well thought out and time taken to write an email is deleted unread. But, hey, that is their choice. Who knows, they might just be missing out and not even knowing it. LOL

Also, I agree with the three points Atavist mentioned. Form mailings are just as rude as deleting unopened mail. It is numbers game. One day, if you are true and stick with it, you may find the one you seek. And, of course, the last and biggest problem for women is the pretender, players and HNG mail the get. Gawd, I feel for them.

The only thing I can add to it is be real, keep you expectation low and , maybe talk to one at a time. It has worked for me. I have been at this for over 9 years and I may have just recently met the one for me. Seems like, so far. But, only time will tell the true tale.

Good luck and safe journeys to you.
DoK

< Message edited by DeadofKnight -- 3/5/2005 8:48:03 AM >

_____________________________

Knight
These are my views and my opinions. Please treat them as such.
If you'd like to ask a question of my posts, mail me here on Collarme.
Mutually collared with hesterprynne

(in reply to Atavist)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:15:23 PM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline
As has been said on here, these people get a lot of email. If you sent out 100 messages, it is almost certain they were non personalized. Why would you expect someone who is already overwhelmed to respond to a form letter? If you expect to find someone, get a bit more selective. Actually find some subs that matches you that you seem to match in return and write them well thought out missives. Make sure your mail reflects that you have read their profile. You will still not get 100% response, but I suspect you'll do better than you have. I hate to say it, but I consider form mail rude. If I respond to it, it is usually to tell the person how much I resent being the recipient of it. If I am not special enough to spend time writing to.. do not bother me.


< Message edited by BeachMystress -- 2/6/2005 4:16:03 PM >

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:27:39 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

If your serious, I suggest you be prepared for a long slog until you find what you're looking for. It's a process of natural selection, those that are serious and can adapt to the environment have better odds.



How very well put. I would add "it's a process of natural selection and not a process of elimination; those that are serious and can adapt to the environment have better odds."



_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to Atavist)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:31:20 PM   
SecretDomme


Posts: 152
Joined: 1/21/2004
Status: offline 		"Mass mailings" are just silly in my opinion, and quite obvious too, when I receive them. If you think about how one would approach seeking someone out in a bar or group situation, would one approach 100 people in a night? Just because it's possible online doesn't mean it's going to get you anywhere.

Be well,
Julie

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:39:04 PM   
ProtagonistLily


Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

"Mass mailings" are just silly in my opinion, and quite obvious too, when I receive them.


A month or so ago, I got a very well written note from a submissive male. It was fairly articulate, and seemed to have taken time to write.

So, I went to look at his profile, and he had the exact same text there.

I politely let him know I wasn't interested. He sent me another note to let me know how wrong I was and how perfect he was and "The One" for me he was. This happens to me quite frequently...the begging and the whining. I'm sure it happens to other Dommes too. (I'm gender specific here because I have a feeling that the female subs go about this differantly, and aren't as up front about the begging, but I certainly could be wrong.)

It tires me out after a while...

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to SecretDomme)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:48:14 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily
quote:

"Mass mailings" are just silly in my opinion, and quite obvious too, when I receive them.


A month or so ago, I got a very well written note from a submissive male. It was fairly articulate, and seemed to have taken time to write.

So, I went to look at his profile, and he had the exact same text there.
Lily...

I have received a standardized letter from 2 different subs (very well written) on 2 or 3 different occasions using same letter; I always wonder "are these people retarded?
I don't care if an email is short (saying I like your profile), I will tend to reply any courteous/honest approach; I definitely pass over obvious phonies and people with such bad memory they'd email same (at times not-applicable) email to me over and over. M

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 4:49:50 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Most subs will check a profile when they receive unsolicited mail. Your black print on the dark blue background is very hard to read. If they feel your profile isn't a match for them they may not respond. If you want to catch their attention it might be wise to make a comment about their profile so at least they know you read it and it interested you. JMHO.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 5:01:44 PM   
Sirensong


Posts: 88
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline 		Oh for goodness sake.
These kind people are being WAY to nice to you.
They may be submissive..but they are not YOUR submissive..so therefore owe you diddly.

WHAT makes you think that by not replying they are not submissive ?

They are just not being submissive to YOU..cant say I blame them if this is your attitude to be quite frank.

Many get an AWFUL lot of mail..mostly troll mail from individuals who think that by lobbing a few hundred emails out MIGHT..and I stress might..get them a reply that will be in the positive.
Personaly if you can mail a 100 or so submissives you cannot be amking them very personal..there would be little or no thought involved or indeed effort on your part if this is what you have been doing.
If you cannot be arsed to write a nice email and having read their profile perhaps personalise it in some way..then WHY should they be arsed to email you back.

(in reply to proudsub)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 5:46:23 PM   
Tangwystal


Posts: 121
Joined: 8/18/2004
Status: offline 		If you sent out 100, and every other dom on here sent out 100... can you just imagine how many emails those poor *rude* submissives would have to be responding to?

I have to agree with those who said that form emails are rude. In my mind they are the rudest of rude, followed closely by the person who, without providing any information about themselves, say, "So tell me about you."

For them I have a form email.

Tang

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:15:05 PM   
sanita


Posts: 338
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline 		i must agree with the last few posts here. i have been a member for less than a week, and i have received quite a few emails. only one of the first 20 was an obvious cut and paste... and you know what? when i sent a polite "no thank you" reply, i received no acknowlegement back.

this topic piqued my interest, because of an email i received yesterday. i had added a journal entry stating that i am not advertising for a Dom/me, because i am happily owned. yet the extremely long cookie-cutter email i received was telling me how the man was the one for me. and telling me how he could fill my needs as a sub.

ummmmmmmmmm, can it be more obvious that this person was emailing as many local femsubs as possible, without even reading their profiles?

in all honesty, i have used cut and paste in replies, and in "all about me" emails, but i have not ever sent identical emails. i try to personlaize them, taking information i have read in their profiles, or that they have told me, into account.

back to the one which was obviously someone trolling: yes, i sent a reply. "No thank you. As stated in my journal entry on my profile, i am taken." i saw no reason to explain further, considering he would probably not read past the first three words. and actually, i was really loathe to send even that.

if one is going to try to lure a pet to play, it might behoove that person to pick out a lure specific to the pet they are trying to tempt.

MasterDonfromPA, You may have spent time in finding over 100 profiles that intrigued you. You may have actually been being selective, and reading as much as possible about each of these sub females. You took the time to write a polite, (hopefully) grammatically correct email. but if they saw nothing in there signifying that there was something special about them that caught Your eye... well, maybe they just didn't think they needed to read something non-specific to themselves.

also, during the latter part of 2/3/05, many emails and message board posts were eaten. if You sent Your initial letters of interest out at that time, they may not have even been received.

anyway, i am being very long-winded. i hope no O/one minds.

"sanita"

(in reply to Sirensong)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:17:08 PM   
MasterDonfromPA


Posts: 24
Joined: 12/26/2004
Status: offline 		ITs amazing, Talk about RUDE, Most of you ASSUMED they were form emails, with No effort on My part,

I spent 12 HOURS here writing emails

And I am not talking about what is owed me except Basic Courtesy, (you know, what Mummy and daddy obviously failed to teach very well)

if One of the subs I trained ever spoke to someone the way Many here speak, She would be diciplined and Pretty strongly

I train My subs to show basic courtesy till someone shows they do NOT deserve it

SAD SAD SAD people

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:17:33 PM   
Moleculor


Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
Status: offline 		Not answering an email from someone they've never met is not rude. It's just them deciding to spend their time elsewhere on places they feel they have more to gain from.

If you don't recieve an answer, assume it means they said no. (You could always try again, sometimes people forget to respond, but don't hold your breath.)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDonfromPA
And I am not talking about what is owed me except Basic Courtesy, (you know, what Mummy and daddy obviously failed to teach very well)


Bwahaha. Did anyone else spy the obvious oxymoron here?

< Message edited by Moleculor -- 2/6/2005 6:23:59 PM >

(in reply to Tangwystal)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:17:58 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirensong

Many get an AWFUL lot of mail..mostly troll mail from individuals who think that by lobbing a few hundred emails out MIGHT..and I stress might..get them a reply that will be in the positive.

<snip>

If you cannot be arsed to write a nice email and having read their profile perhaps personalise it in some way..then WHY should they be arsed to email you back.



I wondered what his emails read like. I have visions of "Greetings little one, I Am The Lord, thy God; feel my benevolence and fear My wrath..." but who knows? Besides, isn't the general rule for cold calling 100 to 1? If so, then 5 "no thanks yous" is ahead of the curve.






_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to Sirensong)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:24:16 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I have visions of "Greetings little one, I Am The Lord, thy God; feel my benevolence and fear My wrath..." but who knows? Besides, isn't the general rule for cold calling 100 to 1? If so, then 5 "no thanks yous" is ahead of the curve.


You mean something like that doesn't get you all hot and bothered? The impersonal approach. Hey, you could take that to some other heated threads here. Impersonal BDSM. Something I never want to delve into.

(in reply to MizSuz)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:36:24 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDonfromPA

I train My subs to show basic courtesy till someone shows they do NOT deserve it



With that very thought in mind, do tell - do you always plow your way into a social situation (for example a party, a munch, or perhaps even an online forum like this one) by bitching about the people in that social setting? So far all we've seen from you is that you conduct yourself like a bull in a china shop. What part of that is supposed to be respected?


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDonfromPA

I train My subs to show basic courtesy till someone shows they do NOT deserve it



With that very thought in mind - perhaps your original post 'showed you didn't deserve it.'

One would think that someone professing to be a teacher would at least, for the sake of prudence, be circumspect enough to familiarize themself with the forum. But perhaps you are not prudent, and perhaps some people have been trained and learned to be wary of a dominant who isn't prudent.


quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDonfromPA

I train My subs to show basic courtesy till someone shows they do NOT deserve it



With that very thought in mind -

Are you familiar with the Margaret Thatcher quote "Being powerful is like being a lady; if you have to tell people you are, you aren't"?



_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to MasterDonfromPA)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:38:44 PM   
MadameDahlia


Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
I always wonder "are these people retarded?


Hee hee... I can't even begin to count the number of times that very thought has crossed my mind.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Moleculor
Bwahaha. Did anyone else spy the obvious oxymoron here?


If you're talking about what I think you're talking about... then yes! - as I read it I thought, hm... amusing.


_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: RUDE submissives - 2/6/2005 6:44:21 PM   
sanita


Posts: 338
Joined: 1/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterDonfromPA

I posted a Very well written email To over 100 people Seeking what I wanted Here, (...)


maybe that was misunderstood, but to me, that sounds like one email, one hundred times.

quote:

ITs amazing, Talk about RUDE, Most of you ASSUMED they were form emails, with No effort on My part,

I spent 12 HOURS here writing emails


oh, really? well, perhaps it was just not clear.

and respect is subjective. i agree with You. there is a basic level of respect until someone does something to show that they do not deserve it. maybe i should write a note to all the credit card companies that want me to go into debt with them, or call all the telemarketers back, when i see their number on my caller ID. maybe, just maybe the respect is in not responding negatively.

the moment someone called my sumbmissiveness into question (individually, or as a group), and suggests that how my Master controls me is lacking in discipline because they'd do it differently... this without knowing me... well, there you go...

my Master does not mind my speaking up. i won't be rude, but that person will not get my respect.

maybe, by not speaking up, some are avoiding rudeness, because they have nothing to respect.

"sanita"

(in reply to MadameDahlia)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Polls and Other Random Stupidity >> RUDE submissives Page: [1] 2 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094