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AAkasha -> RE: Question About Humiliation (4/19/2005 1:54:32 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
Forgive my intrusion into the Mistress / Domme side of the universe. I've been following this subject and was hoping that someone else would hit upon this point, but since no one has I just had to comment. "Mea Culpa"!
Aakasha has a dilemma, enjoying humiliation scenes but not wanting to be "serving" as a submissive's enabler. This is an occasion for the Master/Mistress to use his/her abilities to turn the situation around so that is serves and pleases the Master/Mistress. It's relatively easy. I'll attempt to illustrate using the examples sited.
Sure the 'non-femme' guy who gets off by cross-dressing wouldn't mind stopping over your apartment and prance around you in a tutu, but demand that in order to get that "pleasure" that he prance around outside in the yard for 15 minutes at the risk of being seen, and he may appreciate 'paying' for the privilege. Sure your little 'pet' wants to be your puppy, but doing it as a moonlight walk along the beach, and include some outdoor fetching or "trick training", and once again the matter of control is back in the hands intended.
I've never had a male sub but I can think of 100's of ways to incorporate his need for humiliation through cross-dressing into very interesting scenes. Imagine requiring a "Macho" man to wear the same red or pink silk panties every day to work between the times that he comes to see you. Most mens rooms don't offer the privacy of individual stalls and just the idea of being caught will keep him in a nervous state.
I don't see any "topping from below" if a slave or sub's fantasies are incorporated into a scene. It's incumbent upon the Master/Mistress to think of how to incorporate the idea into his/her satisfaction. If you only play with your puppy as the puppy wants to be played with; you will have a spoiled puppy. The power dynamic is by taking control of your puppy, and in that persona create a powerful scene for both of you.
My suggestion is, instead of just "going with the flow", use the flow to take you places you may have not visited yet. This type of play is a fantastic tool to develop trust, which leads to expanding limits. Ultimately your sub must trust you and KNOW that you won't pull up to his place of business and make him get out wearing his tutu. But when you drive by and beep the horn, it should get a hell of a reaction from him, and should be the head trip that you want.
It's not really a problem anymore because I did find a man who has the balance I seek -- he's not really a fetishist, he doesn't seek any specific kink, and most people would call him pretty vanilla. But he will do anything to make me wet -- anything to please me -- things he would never do for another soul. That's the kind of submission that I needed.
Regarding the crossdresser outside, etc. I would not ever put my neighbors in that situation. I don't believe in getting outsiders involved. Also, a lot of crossdressers have a huge fetish for being caught, that's part of the thrill. It's not worth the risk of offending an innocent bystander.
And I have the panties-to-work scenario pretty nailed down. My entire "corporate slut" series on my site has been going since 1996 or so, all about stripping a high powered executive of his power by sissifying him under his power suit.
I think there's someone for everyone. I think what happened with me is I got spoiled by feasting on the uneasiness and fear of having a man do embarrassing or humiliating things for me way before I ever met a "submissive" who actually wanted these things done -- asked me to do them -- hell, pressured me to do them. I never experienced topping from the bottom before that, etc.
Akasha
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