Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (Full Version)

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flightinthenight -> Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 2:06:47 PM)

Hello Mistresses,

I sincerely hope this post finds you all smiling and doing well. I am writing today out of confusion and perplexity. I belong to several online forums, and Lifestyle message boards and would appreciate the replies of the Women Mistresses here. For the most part the sentiment of Female Superioriety is echoed by most all of the male submissives on these forums. My confusion lies in the fact that the same sentiment ceases to exist here at collarme.com. Simply put, do you feel many of the male submissives on collarme.com are not truly submissive, but in fact bottoms ?  I believe in a difference, do You?  The reason I say this is the fact that having been in the Lifestyle for the past several years, I personally have met and spoke to many true male submissives. The reason I am questioning the majority of "male submissives" upon this site is the absolute common bond all male subs share. That common bond is the absolute undenialable belief in Women being completely superior to the male race. It is the one commonality that the hundreds of male subs I have met in person and online have shared and elated in believing. Then there is collarme.com, where the sentiment is literally polar opposite of most everywhere else, whether online or at Lifestyle parties. Perhaps I am absolutely wrong, I have been numerous times before. I did not just fall off the gullible truck, so I thought I would ask the fine, beautiful dominant Women on this post their thoughts and opinions. Thank you Ladies for instilling the desire within me and all real male submissives to wake every morning, rise , only for the hope to fall to our knees and worship at your beautiful feet. Have a great day, whatever you do, do it with a:) !




Morrigel -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 2:18:18 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: flightinthenight

Hello Mistresses,

I sincerely hope this post finds you all smiling and doing well. I am writing today out of confusion and perplexity. I belong to several online forums, and Lifestyle message boards and would appreciate the replies of the Women Mistresses here. For the most part the sentiment of Female Superioriety is echoed by most all of the male submissives on these forums. My confusion lies in the fact that the same sentiment ceases to exist here at collarme.com.


Collarme.com is...a little different from the BDSM community in public gatherings, at least as I have experienced.  Atmosphere here on the forums seems to be much more similar to what I would expect in the vanilla world, especially where attitudes toward women are concerned.  I would suspect that this site is actually much more popular with newcomers to BDSM than public events are--people feel protected by their Internet anonymity--and these newcomers carry with them the old attitudes and prejudices they have not yet shed.

That said, I have not seen the tenets of Female Supremacy widely discussed or accepted in a lot of other venues either; I just tend to see a lot more acceptance of male submission and female dominance generally, in public.  As well as better social skills.

Can't address the topic of other sites; the only one I'm familiar with is Alt, and there are no free forums there.  Their chatrooms vary by region and the people involved.

--M 




Hercuckslave -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:15:07 PM)

i am a male slave but i do NOT believe in Female Superiority.  by your definition does that make me not a true slave?  or merely a bottom?

for me, i don't believe that anyone is superior to anyone else.  black, white, brown, male, female, etc.  we are all equal human beings.  the fact that i am a slave is not based on me being inferior to my Mistress, but rather upon the both of us choosing to live together under an established and agreed upon heirarchy.  I have chosen to live as her slave, she has chosen to own me.  period.  has nothing to do with superior or inferior.  Merely Dominant and submissive. 

We have several friends in the lifestyle who happen to be male dom, female slave relationships.  again, the female slave is not inferior to her male master, merely subordinate. 

you say with complete certainty that ALL TRUE MALE SUBMISSIVES believe undeniably in female supremacy.  speak for yourself man.  perhaps in online forums where 99% have no clue about real time, but rather live in their little fantasy worlds.  i have been living the lifetsyle for over 20 years and have been the collared slave to Mistress for nearly 6, 24/7 TPE service, submission and slavery.  I find your generalizations to be prejudiced, biased, and frankly, a bit insulting. 

so although i am not a Mistress, i felt compelled to respond.  by your definition, to be a "real" submissive one would have to believe in Female Supremacy.  pretty holier than thou don't you think?  your way is not the only way.  i would be careful about using words like "true" when talking about folks in D/s, or any lifestyle for that matter.  What is true for one, may not be true for another.  There are as many different ways to live D/s as there are people in it.

just one slave's opinion.

M's m




gooddogbenji -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:21:48 PM)

If you have a black manager at work, how can you do what he says without believing in black superiourity?

Makes ya wonder, dunnit?

Yours,


benji




flightinthenight -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:26:39 PM)

TAKE NOTE:  THIS ISNT ABOUT WHETHER A MAN BELIEVES IN  FEMALE SUPERIORITY!


No offense but "Just one slave's opinion" was not what I was asking for.  Please respect my thread. I was gearing this to Mistresses.

I want to hear from them whether  there's a differnence between male bottoms and male submissives.

I know you want to say YOU DONT BELIEVE IN FEMALE SUPERIORITY.  but this is not about your opinion on female superiority.   It's about bottoms and subs.  More specifically it is to  Mistresses on male subs versus male bottoms.

I've read yours and other "male subs" opinion on superiority in other titled posts and feel you sufficiently cast your opinions loud and clear there.  REad it.  Get it.  Now if you dont mind I hope to hear from the Mistresses regarding the title of my thread. 

Thank you sincerely.




Lashra -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:26:46 PM)

My sub nor I believe in the superiority of either gender. We believe that both have their strengths and weaknesses. Also that one cannot survive without the other.

~Lashra




Hercuckslave -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:36:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: flightinthenight

TAKE NOTE:  THIS ISNT ABOUT WHETHER A MAN BELIEVES IN  FEMALE SUPERIORITY!


No offense but "Just one slave's opinion" was not what I was asking for.  Please respect my thread. I was gearing this to Mistresses.

I want to hear from them whether  there's a differnence between male bottoms and male submissives.

I know you want to say YOU DONT BELIEVE IN FEMALE SUPERIORITY.  but this is not about your opinion on female superiority.   It's about bottoms and subs.  More specifically it is to  Mistresses on male subs versus male bottoms.

I've read yours and other "male subs" opinion on superiority in other titled posts and feel you sufficiently cast your opinions loud and clear there.  REad it.  Get it.  Now if you dont mind I hope to hear from the Mistresses regarding the title of my thread. 

Thank you sincerely.


i respect your post.  and you do ask about the difference between a bottom and a slave, but predicated that difference upon the belief in female supreriority.  re: in order to be a true slave, one must believe in female supriority.  one slave's opinion....its bull shit.  and you putting "male subs" in quotes referring to those who don't share your belief in female superiority is pure bullshit too.  if i were to venture another opinion, it would be that you have never ventured past the computer and your little fantasy land into the real time FemmeDomme or D/s community. 

i see from your profile that you are African American.  I would think that one who faces the ridiculous notion of white supremacy from those absurd racists and racist groups would be more in tune with the fact that we are all equal under the Lord.

sorry you don't like my opinion, but that's just too bad. 




gooddogbenji -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:42:53 PM)

Aint it ironic that we just had a thread on female superiourity, and this guy appears today and decides that, coincidentally, all men who disagreed in the other thread are now bottoms, not slaves or subs.

Come out, come out, whoever you are.

Yours,


benji




Najakcharmer -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:48:16 PM)

Are you possibly confusing "submissive to one Owner/Mistress/wife/life partner" with "submissive to everything on the planet with tits"?

I don't think that a person's worth, superiority or inferiority has much to do with their genital configuration.  It's a lot more complicated than that in the real world.  There are women who are lying, cheating, stealing, heroin-addicted gutter prostitutes.  Would you deem them "superior" and submit to them unconditionally?  I wouldn't advise it.

The forums here aren't really about roleplaying.  This is real people talking to one another like normal adults in the real world.  We're talking about BDSM, but we're not all doing BDSM with each other.  So people who identify as male dominant, female dominant, gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, etc, can just exchange straight talk on a social and information exchange basis.

I happen to be a female dominant, but I have good friends who are male dominants, both gay and straight.  I don't like it much when people insult my friends by telling them that their entire lifestyle and sexual orientation is wrong.   It isn't wrong; it's just different from mine. 




MistressSassy66 -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 4:57:09 PM)

IMO...a submissive/slave isnt looking for sex.From My own experiences those that identify as bottoms are more into the sexual aspects.A slave is someone who lives with Me.

Here are a couple of definitions from the Urban Dictionary( I included slave as its commonly used also)

Submissive
A person in BDSM who submits to a Dominant person. A submissive can be a slave and/or the bottom (the person being tied up or whipped, etc.).



Bottom
1) Someone who prefers to take a more submissive role in sexual situations. This definition pertains to the B/D/S/M (Bondage and Domination, Domimation and Submission, Sado-Masochism) scene.

2) A homosexual male who either a) enjoys receiving anal penetration or b) is activeluy involved in being anally penetrated.

1) You can tell she's a bottom because she's wearing a collar.

2) Oh, Jeff is such a bottom. As soon as any cute guy walks past he's on his back with his knees by his ears!


Slave
Giving of oneself willfully, openly and completely to another. In a BDSM relationship this is done with trust and honesty between to consenting parties. A slave is also called a bottom in the BSDM world.

He is my Master and I am his Slave, we have entered into this relationship of our own free-will.









flightinthenight -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:07:37 PM)

Hmmm,

Just a thought for those who think they understood what I was trying to convey. What is your definition of a male submissive as opposed to a male bottom ? Do you feel most on collarme.com fall under the category of bottom ? I simply was also making an effort to speak with like minded individuals in an adult forum, respecting each and everyone's likes, differences and opinions. I find it ironic, that on several posts the fact of my being black or as the good ole boys politically correct way of speaking African American has been included in their response to my post. I am not African American as I was born in Ireland. I am simply a black, Irishman who firmly believes Women truly are superior to men. Imagine your shock if at the end of the rainbow, this Leprachan who is a brother asked you if want a pair of gold teeth !!!! I would have a battle of wits with you, but contrary to popular belief this black man would never attack an unarmed man.




flightinthenight -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:09:55 PM)

Just wanted to say thank you for your factual, educated response. You understand exactly what I was speaking about.




flightinthenight -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:12:15 PM)

I think you misunderstood my comment, and opinion. I was not attacking anyone personally merely discussing what I have experienced and the opinion of others that may have or have not experienced the same. If you were offended, please understand the reasoning for my post. Have a great day !




orfunboi -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:18:18 PM)

i am curious as to why you felt the need to create a new id to post this question. Obviously you have been on CM for a while, or you would not have formed an opinion on how most of the male subs here feel. Yet your profile says you joined today.




flightinthenight -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:24:14 PM)

Doesnt take too long to read the hottest lastest threads.




Hercuckslave -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:28:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: flightinthenight

Doesnt take too long to read the hottest lastest threads.


especially when reading them with a closed mind.




undergroundsea -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:30:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: flightinthenight
The reason I say this is the fact that having been in the Lifestyle for the past several years, I personally have met and spoke to many true male submissives. The reason I am questioning the majority of "male submissives" upon this site is the absolute common bond all male subs share. That common bond is the absolute undenialable belief in Women being completely superior to the male race.


quote:

TAKE NOTE:  THIS ISNT ABOUT WHETHER A MAN BELIEVES IN  FEMALE SUPERIORITY!


Alrighty then. This post is not about whether I believe in female superiority. But it is about whether male submission is contingent upon a belief in female superiority at a universal level, which is what you ask.

My experience from attending hundreds of BDSM events (munches, fetish nights, play parties, educational events, and weekend conventions) across at least 12 cities shows me a reality different than the one you know. I am active on another major BDSM site with people from multiple countries and the reality you describe does not exist there. Sure, there are people of each sex who believe in female superiority. Sure, there are events or groups with a culture that leans towards female supremacy (which does not universally equate to female superiority). But I do not see the absolute, undeniable belief you describe as a common bond.

My experience is that most people who claim to know what a true submissive or slave is themselves have limited knowledge about the matter and the diversity that exists within BDSM.

Cheers,

Sea




Najakcharmer -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:40:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: flightinthenight

I think you misunderstood my comment, and opinion. I was not attacking anyone personally merely discussing what I have experienced and the opinion of others that may have or have not experienced the same. If you were offended, please understand the reasoning for my post. Have a great day !


I'm sorry if it seemed that I was stating that you were attacking anyone directly.  That line you didn't cross.  However some points of view are pretty difficult to discuss without being more or less automatically offensive.  White supremacy for one, (insert gender here) supremacy for another.  I'm not honestly sure I see much difference between any type of "supremacy" where people are judged for accidents of birth rather than how they conduct themselves and what they are able to achieve in life. 




CoonInTheNoon -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:42:31 PM)

hey man!!!!

sorry, i just couldn't resist.  [sm=biggrin.gif]




Najakcharmer -> RE: Male bottoms versus Male submissives- Mistress advice wanted (11/14/2006 5:42:33 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea
My experience is that most people who claim to know what a true submissive or slave is themselves have limited knowledge about the matter and the diversity that exists within BDSM.


But I thought it was all written in the Big Leather Book of Answers, on page 42.  Along with the 87 True Slave Positions and the 1,498 True Slave Rules.  [8D]




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