RE: Re-negotiating hard limits

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RE: Re-negotiating hard limits - 11/25/2006 8:03:44 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
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Over time I've had to expand my hard limits. It isn't until I've tried something that I know how I will react. You say he felt extreme embarrassment as a result of this. Perhaps what is embarrassment to you is degrading to him and his self esteem. However the fact that you two could not communicate fully the ramifications of this does say that you were correct in your decision to call off the relationship.

(in reply to justLady)

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RE: Re-negotiating hard limits - 11/25/2006 11:10:06 AM

VampX

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Joined: 10/16/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

Over time I've had to expand my hard limits...

Hard limits...what that means? If you had to and if you have decided to expand them, obviously those were not "hard limits".
From my experience, hard limits are HARD LIMITS and, as such, they are not expandable. Just limits, on the other hand, are expandable and negotiable...
There is a difference as fare as I know...but that's just me.

(in reply to Celeste43)

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Post #: 22

RE: Re-negotiating hard limits - 11/25/2006 12:33:28 PM

thetammyjo

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Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VampX

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

Over time I've had to expand my hard limits...

Hard limits...what that means? If you had to and if you have decided to expand them, obviously those were not "hard limits".
From my experience, hard limits are HARD LIMITS and, as such, they are not expandable. Just limits, on the other hand, are expandable and negotiable...
There is a difference as fare as I know...but that's just me.

I believe it means that as new things were tried, new things had to go on the hard limits list. New things probably went onto the soft limits or the "let's do it more" lists too.

How can one list a hard limit, soft limit, or a "must have" until you've tried it is the theory behind this.

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(in reply to VampX)

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RE: Re-negotiating hard limits - 11/25/2006 5:19:13 PM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
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quote:

ORIGINAL: VampX

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

Over time I've had to expand my hard limits...

Hard limits...what that means? If you had to and if you have decided to expand them, obviously those were not "hard limits".
From my experience, hard limits are HARD LIMITS and, as such, they are not expandable. Just limits, on the other hand, are expandable and negotiable...
There is a difference as fare as I know...but that's just me.

Apparantly I was unclear. My apologies. What I meant was that I have added things to my list of hard limits. Things I hadn't known would be harmful to me until I tried them had not, obviously, been on my hard limit list until after I tried them and discovered how very damaging they were.

(in reply to VampX)

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Post #: 24