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Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 1:37:43 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		When I log on I often see a profile of someone who might fit those search categories we can choose. What I notice is that often the picture is unflattering and I was wondering why today.

For me, I think it is the lack of a smile.

In my picture I am smiling so much it practically breaks the image -- I was very happy when that picture was taken. So if you think I'm too fat or you hate curly, red hair, you get distracted by my sincere grin (I hope).

So why do people choose to use pictures where they are not smiling or even worse where they look so sad and miserable?

Is it some idea that it will make them look more serious or more submissive?

I think it just looks sad and I don't need a sad person in my life, do you?

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 2:09:32 PM   
LordVelvet


Posts: 311
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline 		tammyjo,
I agree with you that a nice smile goes a long way in a photo. As to why other choose not to have one I couldn't say, I choose not to have a photo at all, wonder what that says about ME?

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 2:11:52 PM   
asubiam


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/29/2006
Status: offline 		I also choose not to post a picture, but have no problem sending one if requested.

(in reply to LordVelvet)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 2:11:52 PM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		oh jeez. i'm not smiling in my pic. i hadn't even thought about that.

(in reply to LordVelvet)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 2:49:45 PM   
LuciusAestus


Posts: 26
Joined: 12/12/2006
Status: offline 		I find myself looking stupid when smiling on photos. I don't really think I look good on pictures in general, but my smile seems to magnify this. People usually say I look angry in my pix, I prefer smiling on the inside ;). And in general I guess people have different ways they like to be seen, so some people will smile and some will not and perhaps many on't even think about it. If someone wishes for people to think they're friendly, a smile would be fitting, but perhaps some people want the opposite?

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 4:12:57 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

oh jeez. i'm not smiling in my pic. i hadn't even thought about that.


Yours isn't a close up of your face. I'd say you look thoughtful or that you are listening to someone.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to cjenny)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 4:13:59 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuciusAestus

I find myself looking stupid when smiling on photos. I don't really think I look good on pictures in general, but my smile seems to magnify this. People usually say I look angry in my pix, I prefer smiling on the inside ;). And in general I guess people have different ways they like to be seen, so some people will smile and some will not and perhaps many on't even think about it. If someone wishes for people to think they're friendly, a smile would be fitting, but perhaps some people want the opposite?



That's why I had mine taken when I was very happy.

There was a study a while ago that you can't fake a real smile because while you can make your mouth do the motions, your eyes won't and people can tell the difference.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to LuciusAestus)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 4:14:44 PM   
Rumtiger


Posts: 2634
Joined: 3/4/2006
From: Vegas
Status: offline 		have you seen the pic where I try to smile?

It scares even me sometimes.

_____________________________

Fuck the Pandas!
-Moi

Mmm, I love me some kickboxers, you know why? Cause ya'll cant take a punch!
- Quentin Tarantino.

If they cant take a joke, fuck em.
-Tucker Max

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 7:01:13 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: masterbobandsub

ill even take you to the loo and wipe your botty .

But will you smile while you do that?

(in reply to masterbobandsub)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 8:33:53 PM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline 		I picked my main picture for two reasons.  One, I like the mood I was in when it was taken, and I think at least some of it comes through in my expression.  I'm working with a wild critter that isn't visible in this version of the photo. I am completely focused and intent on what I am doing, with what I would describe as Zen-like calm, and a real sense of pleasure and enjoyment at working with the magnificent animal.   It's not - exactly - a smile, but I think it conveys some of what I want it to.  I could be wrong however.

The second reason I use that as my main profile pic is that it's the plain old me with no makeup and about 50+ lbs heavier than I am now, and that helps filter out some of the assholes that are writing me for the wrong reasons.

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 8:42:25 PM   
kyra


Posts: 30
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		 i love a stern, dominant look. rawr! however, i think there should be a variety of pictures. at least one with a smile ^__^

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 9:18:55 PM   
SmokingGun82


Posts: 575
Joined: 6/19/2004
Status: offline 		I like the picture on my profile... I wasn't paying attention and my roommate at the time was a photographer. Plus, I always look like I'm faking a smile in pictures, no matter how happy I am. 

_____________________________

It frightens me, the awful truth of how sweet life can be.
- Bob Dylan

Proper capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my Uncle Jack off a horse" and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse."

(in reply to kyra)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/14/2006 9:45:53 PM   
pixelslave


Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline 		In general, I have to agree with you Tammy Jo.  A photo says a lot about a person to me.  If it isn't either warm, thoughtful, sensuous, or otherwise appealing for one reason or another, I'm not going to be attracted to it.  Photos of people who appear angry, disinterested, sad, lonely, stern, vicious, extreme, etc., aren't at all appealing to me.  I want to be with someone who is warm and inviting. 

When we get to the point where we know each other and are ready to begin a scene together, she can show me the other parts that can be nasty, wicked, strict, and for other reasons quite exciting.  Until then, I want to know the person behind that persona who I'd want to spend a lot of time with.  That's just my opinion, your mileage may vary.

- pixel

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 12:15:35 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline 		I wouldn't mind some feedback on the expression in my profile pic.  What does it convey?  Does it qualify as a smile or not?  I know what I'm doing in the pic and how I'm feeling, but I'm less sure of how well it might be translating to other folks who see it.  Especially since this version of the pic doesn't actually show anything other than the facial expression.

(in reply to pixelslave)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 12:23:35 AM   
DanceDreaming


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/2/2006
Status: offline 		Yours is kinda -like- a smile Najak. It's pretty inviting, and warm, even if it isn't a beaming smile like TammyJo. Mine isn't a smile, but I still love the pic. Going to have to upload a cleaner copy though... that one got mangled somehow.

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 12:32:18 AM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline 		I try not to smile because then the police might recognize my picture.

I actually just listened to a graduate student give a final paper presentation on the literature involving why interpersonal communication often leads to situations where smiling is frowned upon, for lack of better wording. There's a belief in a lot of communities that people who smile look ridiculous because they are not used to seeing themselves smile very often. As such, they frown when they take pictures, because they are used to seeing that reaction in themselves and don't want to look ridiculous (even though they don't really). Even I don't smile that often in pictures. I'm just as guilty as everyone else.


_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 1:11:42 AM   
Najakcharmer


Posts: 2121
Joined: 5/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DanceDreaming

Yours is kinda -like- a smile Najak. It's pretty inviting, and warm, even if it isn't a beaming smile like TammyJo. Mine isn't a smile, but I still love the pic. Going to have to upload a cleaner copy though... that one got mangled somehow.


Thanks for the feedback!

People who see the rest of the photo either never see the expression or they do a major double take when they do. That's one of the reasons I don't show the whole thing.  The critter I've got my hands on in this picture is arguably among the world's most dangerous animals, and it is clearly signalling defensive intent.   I feel a Zen-like calm and a deep focus inside the mind of the animal, so that I am aware of its intentions and reactions almost before it is.  This focus allows me to stay literally one step ahead of it as I work at very close quarters.  Also I am thinking how beautiful the animal is and how rewarding it is to work with this particular species, and concerned for the animal's safety and comfort.

I tend to be extremely camera shy and prefer to avoid audiences in circumstances like these, as I don't believe that wild animals should be used to bolster human ego and there's far too much of that type of annoying drama around already.  So I don't have a lot of photos of me that capture the "perfectly calm, controlled and centered" mindset.  That's why I keep this one, even though it's a bit outdated.  

(in reply to DanceDreaming)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 1:39:09 AM   
beltainefaerie


Posts: 610
Joined: 4/15/2006
Status: offline 		I definitely like the smiles, but I think some people are trying to look serious and are afraid smiling will make them look goofy.

cjenny, you aren't smiling, but you look pleasantly wistful, as opposed to some of the sad, bored or confused-looking pics that I think the OP was referring to.

< Message edited by beltainefaerie -- 12/15/2006 1:43:36 AM >

(in reply to cjenny)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 4:50:09 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline 		I have to be honest - I'm just happy when they're smart enough to send a face shot and not one of their genitalia.



_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to beltainefaerie)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Profile pictures and smiles - 12/15/2006 7:09:38 AM   
pinkkeith


Posts: 605
Joined: 11/26/2006
From: Illinois
Status: offline 		I think my smiles look goofy when I see it in a photograph.

One thing that gets me when looking at a photo is that it never looks like the person I see in the mirror.

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 20
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